Mar 7, 2025
We Had to be Better...
Chrysler Laser XE, 1985
seen from United States
seen from Spain
seen from Türkiye
seen from Hungary
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from Philippines
seen from United States
We Had to be Better...
Chrysler Laser XE, 1985
Hello! question for you? do you have a favorite car lock/unlock chime?
Hello! Answer for you:
That's a very hard opinion for me to form because here cars don't have them, we just trust car owners to be able to tell that the car that made the clunking sound and indicators flash it does when it locks its doors locked its doors. Which is partly why this answer comes to you well over two weeks after your asked me, as I just didn't know what to do with it.
So I could answer that my favorite chime is around 6:38 in this video, which I recommend you don't skip to because the rest of the video is great too...
...but if that feels like cheating to you, well, I'm out of answers.
So I will just talk horns and chimes some more until you're satisfied.
My mother's Citroën had this seatbelt chime, which I found pretty endearing, but without the peculiarity herein described. (It should start at 11:41, just in case it doesn't for you.)
My father's Audi had this calm, soothing chime which perfectly suited its soothing comfort, yet always reminded me of something...
2000s Renaults had a talking vehicle computer!
And if that sounds like a very 80s thing, well, you're absolutely right!
Chrysler's Electronic Voice Alert, or EVA, was an option made available in the mid-80s that used the Texas Instruments' LPC Speech Chip you know and love from the Speak & Spell.
Unfortunately, while that was just a warnings list, many of those were spoken quite frequently, in part due to the vehicles in question being mid-80s Chrysler products, leading to the system swiftly getting on people's nerves, and in the models before a switch to turn it off was included owners resorted to pulling the fuse, which in some cases disabled the fuel gauge. Welp.
But that was not the only system nor first system of its kind: there was, in 1983, the MG Maestro's system.
If that voice sounds familiar, its voice actress Nicolette McKenzie had starred in John Sichel's Merchant Of Venice. If you're not from that side of Tumblr, she also starred in Horizon: Zero Dawn. A monotonous career path sure doesn't seem to be among her problems.
But this system was not the first either: some '81 to '84 Nissans (or Datsuns, as those were the very years that brand name, created for American shores, was getting phased out) used a Voice Warning system that used an even earlier technology than TI's chip (that's Texas Instrument's LPC speech synthesizing integrated circuits, not the money of trap music pioneer T.I.): a phonograph.
This wasn't a novel approach either, phonograph-based warning systems being used in late '70s-early '80s appliances and toys, and in-car record players having been a thing even prior!
In fact, to paraphrase Dr. Doofenshmirtz, If I had a nickel for every time I wrote about in-car phonographs, I'd have two nickels - which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?
Although in 1985 Nissan too went electronic for their voice warning system - here's the warnings from those systems over a bad MIDI cover of Thrift Shop.
And that's without even getting into custom door chimes!
And boy will I ever get into custom chimes once I get to that section of my Miata Mod Master Mᴉsɥlᴉsʇ (that's "Wishlist" upside down), which by my estimations should be about April 2024. So keep your eyes peeled!
Links in blue are posts of mine about the topic in question - if you liked this post, you might like those!
Not many know about this car, but one of my favorite 80s cars, the #ChryslerLaser
My design/sketch of what could be if it was still being made
Based it on the current 300, Challenger, Chrysler's K-Cars and the original
#Stellantis #Design #AutomotiveDesign #Mopar #Chrysler #Pentastar #KCar #80s
1984 Chrysler Laser "The Competition is Good We Had to Be Better" TV Commercial
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