Syzygy - An AU of Infundo (post-Infundo Chronicles).
Chapter 2: Phase I Trials
Chapter 2 Summary: Talking through the baby steps. Together.
Link to Chapter 1
Author notes: This a ridiculously short chapter, so no “read more” tags needed. Also my posting schedule will be Tuesdays, until I’m stuck in the story and haven’t caught up to my writing schedule.
****
Truth was they couldn't start right away, not without enough data. It took a good two months of Tony and Bruce meticulously analyzing Bruce's metabolism. After tirelessly testing his food consumption, mobility, and sleep habits - and adjusting Bed with different "supplements" Bruce could enjoy throughout the day - they pinpointed the handful theories holding some promise.
"You know," Tony said, eyes scanning the floaty blue diagram of Bruce's body. "We haven't taken one thing into account."
Bruce spread his fingers, further blowing up his body's image while concentrating on the data. He noted a few interesting nuances but his thoughts floated in and out of reality so he didn't pick up on Tony's brainstorm. "I thought you agreed with me on the finer details."
"In theory, I guess, but you didn't like my other suggestion. You know it'd help, in the long run."
Bruce nibbled his lip and cautiously turned his effigy on its axis. His belly became a mountain, high and proud, rising above all the data points. "I'm not sure it would. There's a good chance it'll aggravate the Other Guy, resulting in an unscheduled Code Green."
"True, true." Tony nodded and fiddled with another data stream. "But speed, Brucie. It's a faster way. What we have right now might work, sure. But it may take a while before we get close. Years, even. You wanna wait that long?"
Bruce grimaced and spun his figure around, unnecessarily. "You know I don't. But I've put the cart before the horse before and the results weren't pretty."
"I dunno. Green still suits you."
Bruce glowered over the schematic readings, ignoring him.
"I'm just sayin', Bruce. Think about it."
Bruce remained mum but Tony knew he'd planted the seed.
**
Although the first test week was adequate, Bruce didn't get the results he'd wanted.
"Less than a kilogram? That's it?"
"Well, we're fightin' nature, Big Guy. I can adjust the formulas of the current weight gain drinks and powders but you still need to consume it fast enough to override your body's heightened abilities."
"It's still not...bad," Steve murmured. "It's some gain, right?" But even he looked a little disappointed.
"I know, I know." Bruce ran a hand through his curls and they toppled over his scalp like loose springs. "There has to be a faster way, though."
Steve gestured at the data pulled from Jarvis. "Is there anything else we could do? I mean, it doesn't look appetizing but you could try one of those heavy duty Vitamix blenders and liquefy your solid foods."
Bruce made a face. "I'd rather not vomit, thanks." He grimaced at his boyfriends. "The problem is trying to eat beyond my point of feeling stuffed. We have to increase my caloric intake but the gains don't last when I'm not physically able to eat enough or fast enough."
Tony rocked on his heels, leveling his steeliest gaze in Bruce's direction. "You know my thoughts, Banner."
Bruce held up a stern hand. "No. I refuse. I told you before it's not safe."
Steve frowned. "What's not safe?"
Bruce briefly glanced at Tony who made a curt go ahead, tell him gesture. "It's...possibly faster."
"Guaranteed faster."
"Allegedly faster," Bruce said a little louder, in case Tony didn't hear him the first time. "I'm not risking massive property damage just to gain a pound or two."
"We could use the Green Room in the basement."
Bruce rolled his eyes. "Not you too, Steve."
"Well maybe I want in on the secrets. The two of you can't keep discussing options without me, because I'm as much a part of our family as you two are."
Bruce and Tony traded uncomfortable glances. "Sorry," Bruce muttered.
"Agreed. We should've included you in the science stuff." Tony made a face at Bruce. "We might as well tell him, mind if I--?"
Bruce sighed testily. "Be my guest. You were going to, anyway."
"Right," Tony murmured, and for penance from pushing his portly bf a little too much he gave Bruce a small peck on his forehead. "It's one option that yields good results: fasting."
"Fasting?" A scowl marred Steve's features. "Isn't that the opposite of what we're trying to do?"
"Yes and no. If we do it right it'll make Bruce hungrier and he'll overeat, even beyond the levels he's eating now. Every five days we can switch up his eating routine."
"And beyond that," Bruce said, sheepishly glancing down. "I've been...working on a few experimental compounds to quicken the results. But I haven't tested my hypothesis and I'm a little unsure of the outcome.
"But fasting..." Bruce paused and sighed. He ran a chubby hand through his curls and nibbled his bottom lip. "Fasting is problematic because it potentially riles the Other Guy. I hope the compound I'm developing works because I'm hesitant to try anything that threatens my calm."
Tony rolled his eyes. "We've got this, hon'. You know we do. We have the Hulk pod in the basement, and you could even stay down there while you get hungry. Not that you'd want to. And Steve and I'll get your favorite take out, after we're done. Double portions of everything."
Bruce's eyes narrowed, and Tony swore he saw a little green. "We've never tested the containment pod. I've never had a need to, and I've never felt in danger since I've been here. I'd rather not unless there are no other options."
"Suit yourself," Tony said, shrugging. "Five years is an awfully long wait for a goal weight, though."
Bruce made another face. "Too long."
"So go for broke," Steve sighed.
"Exactly,” Tony said. “What harm could it do?"
Bruce locked eyes with Tony. "You don't want the answer to that question."
Having heard enough, Steve sauntered over to his favorite scientists. He slung an arm over both their shoulders (though his reach strained over Bruce’s wide back), and gave both a peck on the cheek. "I think the answer is staring all of us in the face," he told them, and both Tony and Bruce gave him the side-eye.
"It is?"
"You know something we don't?” Tony snarked. “Impossible."
Steve chuckled softly. "Bruce, I know It's not something you really like doing, but the Hulk is part of you. And you eat more after a Hulk-out, don't you?"
Bruce folded his arms and planted his feet, as unyielding as a marble statue of himself. "But I also use up a lot of calories. It's a zero-sum game."
Steve nudged Bruce with his chin and immediately Bruce settled into his warm arms. "Muffin. I think both you and Tony will come up with a plan that'll work, but I don't want either of you over-stressing." His gaze flickered to Tony, who finally caved, lips breaking into a small smile. "We'll figure it out. I'm thinkin' maybe we try a little of everything, yeah? Can we start out slowly, just to see what'll happen? We have time. The answer doesn't have to come today."
"Hmm," Bruce sighed. "I guess so."
"Yeah, okay," Tony grumbled. "I guess he's right."
"You're welcome." He kissed Bruce's temple and held out his other hand for Tony to take it. "Tonight, let's enjoy each other's company. A little food, and fun."
"Don't have to tell me twice," Tony said, quickly shutting down their work station.
* *
Part three: https://burlybanner.tumblr.com/post/186018435219/syzygy-3
Syzygy - An AU of Infundo (post-Infundo Chronicles).
Chapter 5: Phase Trials 2
Chapter 5 Summary: Dr. Banner and Mr. Hulk.
Link to Chapter 1, 2, 3, 4
**
Giving Hulk control wasn't as easy as just saying it, though. Bruce definitely wanted Steve to observe - preferably Steve and Tony both. "He hasn't earned this level of trust," he admitted. "And I'm not comfortable with him in the driving seat."
"He knows that," Tony huffed. Tony seemed a lot more at ease with the prospect that Bruce ever would be. "He's been itchin' to come out, sure, but he knows the two of you have to share the one body. He's more okay with it than you give him credit for."
Bruce grit his teeth. "I know you trust him, since he saved your life and all - "
"You both did."
"Nevertheless," Bruce said, cutting him off. "He's very unpredictable. Even with my resolve he has moments of wanting to break free and I will never, ever feel comfortable giving him control. The whole 'give an inch' idiom is extremely à propos. Give him an inch, and he'll take a fucking planet. You have to watch him."
"Yeah, yeah. Okay, Banner."
"I mean it." Of course Hulk vehemently disagreed, but Bruce stuffed him down. "This isn't a game, it's my life. And by proxy, his. You can't fuck around."
Tony quieted at the urgency Bruce pressed on him and rubbed the back of his neck. "Fine, we'll 'watch' him, or whatever. But I'll prove to you that there's nothing to worry about. You'll see."
"I intend to," Bruce said. Part of the compromise included wearing a body camera every night, to see what Hulk saw and hear what Hulk heard. "I'll review the data each morning. And if I see anything untoward, the experiment's over. Done. No second chances."
Tony almost rolled his eyes but chose not to after Bruce shot him a deadly glare. "It'll be fine," he said.
"I hope so," Bruce muttered. But even if they tried it, he wasn't one hundred percent sure Hulk wouldn't do something against his will. Regardless of what he told the others.
**
"Is everything set?"
"For the fiftieth time, Banner--!"
"Stop." Steve felt Tony's shoulder's tense; he was practically vibrating. While Bruce thought Tony was acting cocky, Steve knew Tony's worry was equally high - he just had a weird way of showing it. "We're ready. D'you think you're relaxed enough to sleep?"
"I kinda have to be, don't I?" The nervous chuckle Bruce gave was less than reassuring. "I mean, unless he can take over when I'm wide awake, without me knowing."
Bruce was half-kidding and they could hear his gallows humor loud and clear. Ultimately losing himself to Hulk scared Bruce most, whether or not he voiced it. "We've got this, Muffin," Steve said, and he wrapped his arms as far as they could go around Bruce's midsection. "I'll take point tonight, Tony tomorrow night."
Bruce pointed to Tony. "You're sleeping in your nanosuit, right?"
Tony tapped his chest, and the lights woven into his shirt fabric glowed. "Not as comfy as I'd like, but I'm on backup. Trust us, Pooh. We got this."
"And I'm all set," Steve said, tugging his earlobe. "Jarvis has me connected. I won't miss anything."
"Okay...okay."
Bruce was anything but okay, though, so Steve held out his hands. "C'mon, let's try it," he said, waiting for Bruce to take his hands. He gently guided them back to their bed, crawled on top of the sheets, and motioned between his legs. "Sit."
Bruce's cheeks pinked up, but he swallowed and lumbered across the sheets to settle between Steve's legs. "Now lay back."
"Steve--"
"Do it."
Bruce huffed, but followed Captain America's command. Steve hid his smile; he'd unearthed small ways that calmed his boys, and as much as Bruce fought against the truth he loved Steve cuddling and nurturing him. He initially pretend not to, but Steve felt how quickly tension left Bruce's body when he took control and treated Bruce special. Bruce only accepted the whole, "I'm in charge, I can handle you" treatment from Steve.
And boy, did he take to it.
Steve widened his stance a little more, feeling his body respond as Bruce nestled in. Over the past few weeks he'd noticed Bruce's broadening backside, even if Bruce didn't. "That's it," Steve whispered. Bruce let out a small sigh as Steve cocooned him as much as he could. His arms couldn't reach around like they used to, but they could cuddle.
"Can I be jealous? I think I've got room to be jealous."
Steve chuckled and patted the bed’s edge. "There's plenty of room for both of you on this bed, Tony."
"Mm," Bruce let out a lengthy sigh. Steve could feel Bruce's body sink into his as they all flirted with sleep. He lightly fingered Bruce's curls, easing him further in. "Not for long."
Steve snorted and grabbed a pillow so Tony could lean against his left side. "Not for long," he agreed. "We'll make you into a marshmallow man yet."
"Now that I'd like to see," Tony said, yawning.
Me too, Steve thought, but he didn't voice it.
**
Captain Rogers.
Steve stirred. What--?
Steve. Captain Rogers.
"Uh?" He blinked. What time was it?
Sorry to disturb you, but you did ask me to alert you.
Steve tapped his ear as he became fully conscious. "Jarvis?"
Yes, Captain Rogers. I'm speaking from your earpiece. You asked me to alert you when Doctor Banner woke - he is currently on the move, and headed for the nearest kitchen.
"Oh, right. On my way."
Steve frowned; he should've felt Hulk’s movements, at the very least. Glancing at the other side of the bed Tony was snoring up a storm. Hulk hadn't disturbed Tony either, apparently.
"Jarvis?" He whispered. "Is Bruce...Bruce right now, or Hulk?"
The AI paused.
Apologies, sir. It's impossible to determine at this time.
Great. What the hell did that mean?
"Okay..." Steve made a face and put on his sweats before heading towards the north kitchen. Guess he'd figure it out when he got there. If it was bad he'd tell Jarvis to alert Tony, but he honestly had no clue what to expect.
In hindsight, they really should've asked Hulk more questions when he showed up.
**
As Steve skittered around the kitchen corner, the only thing he noticed was the wide-open fridge door. He'd come from the opposite side expecting to see Hulk towering over the kitchen island, but he didn't see Hulk. He heard intense munching from inside the refrigerator instead.
"Bruce?" He whispered.
"Grrah... No Banner! Hulk!"
What on earth...?
Steve padded over cautiously and peered over the fridge door. It certainly looked like Bruce, crouched and hunched inside the icebox. But there was something...animalistic about Bruce’s demeanor. Large crumbs and half-eaten empty dishes surrounded him while a mountain of food detritus stained the front of his shirt. He hunkered over a casserole dish with a turkey leg, and used said turkey leg to scoop up whatever existed in the casserole dish.
"Is Hulk!" He repeated loudly, spewing food in every direction. He glared at Steve from half-slit eyes and dug his turkey leg into the dish, taking another huge bite. Food bits fell off the turkey and down his robe.
Steve's mouth flew open. He couldn't help but stare a few beats before speaking. "Uh, wow. Now I see it." Hulk was in charge, but he'd kept Bruce small.
Incredible, Steve thought.
"Hmm!" Hulk-Bruce grunted and slammed the turkey leg into his chest as if asserting dominance. "Banner isn't Hulk. Hulk is Hulk. Hulk will make Banner like Hulk!"
Steve couldn't help the grin that suddenly teased the corners of his lips. "You're doing a great job, Hulk," he told him, and Hulk nodded proudly before tearing into the meat.
"Banner's still too puny," Hulk laughed. His voice was a hybrid between Bruce and Hulk's, low and rough with Bruce's timbre. "Hulk can make Banner all chubby, like Banner wants. But Hulk wants real food."
Steve scratched his chin, trying to decipher what Hulk meant. "Do you mean you like different things?"
Hulk grunted and used the turkey leg as a pointer. "Like that,” he growled, pointing to a casserole. “And that. Those are good. Not this." He pointed to a cake.
"Hmm." Steve pursed his lips, musing over the new information. It looked like Hulk liked meat and fried foods, but Bruce typically went for sweets. "Got it. We can have it ready tomorrow, Br--er, Hulk. Just tell us what you want."
"Mm. Good," Hulk muttered. He used the back of his arm to wipe away the food covering his chin and lips. "More of that," he said, pointing to cold fried chicken. "More grease."
"Anything else?" Steve started taking notes in his head. "You can have anything you want."
Hulk perked up, eyes widening. "Anything?"
Within reason, Steve thought, but he wasn't going to deny Hulk if he kept eating like this. "Sure," Steve said. "Name it."
**
"Oh my God." Bruce held his head in his hands as he reviewed the footage early next morning. "Steve, why the hell did you tell him--"
"C’mon, it's not that bad, Pooh Bear."
Bruce's eyebrow quirked as he glared at Tony.
"You're kidding, right?"
Tony shrugged. "It's not impossible."
Steve wrinkled his nose. "I can't understand how he knew."
"He sees everything I do, but he doesn't understand it. That's the problem." Bruce belched and rubbed his tummy. The stuffing from Hulk's night raid hurt, but he hoped to be hungry for lunch later. "There’s no way we can get all that crap. Even if we did, who the fuck could cook it?"
Tony smirked. "Leave it to me. I've got four-star chefs in my back pocket. If anyone knows, they will."
"He'd never know," Bruce muttered, even as Hulk roared in his head. "You could cook anything. He'd eat it."
Tony held up a hand. "Nothin' doin'. My Green Bean wants what he wants, and I'll get it for him hell or high water."
"That's what I'm afraid of," Bruce said, sighing miserably.
Christ. He felt ill.
**
Steve turned off the Hulk footage after viewing it with Tony for the third time. They both agreed it was practically pornographic, but they needed to see it again. For research.
Yep. Research.
"So? Thoughts?"
Tony shrugged, bumping Steve's shoulder. Feeling frisky Tony ran his stocking foot up Steve's leg and Steve had a feeling the three of them would enjoy themselves later.
"It's not as dire as Bruce makes it and honestly, I bet he's secretly pleased. Hulk totally behaved himself, totally stuffed our boy with some high dollar menu items. I have a feeling we'll appreciate the results in a pretty short time."
Steve grinned as his face got hot. "You should've been there, Tony. Hulk's an eating dynamo, nothin’ stopping him. He got filthy, though. Made him take a shower before we went back to bed."
"Bet Hulkie loved that," Tony laughed. "Can't imagine him wanting to take a shower, by any stretch."
"Nah. It was okay. He liked me scrubbing him down. In fact, I think...well."
Tony perked up and maneuvered his body to catch Steve's eye. "What?"
Steve scratched his neck and sheepishly looked away. "I think Hulk enjoys sharing Bruce's body, like last night. It gives him another perspective he doesn't normally have. I got the feeling he wants to take over Bruce’s body more often."
"Hm." Tony's expression sobered. "Don't let Bruce hear you say that. He'll go apeshit."
"I know. He's already concerned about their boundaries and this sharing thing is stressful for Bruce. But is it bad? I mean, Hulk would still be 'out' more or less. But there wouldn't be any property damage. Bruce wouldn't have to worry about Hulk making a mess."
"But he's also blind to Hulk’s actions," Tony countered. "And there's no guarantee Hulk wouldn't take over their body and swell it green if he got mad enough." Tony tsked between his teeth. "I dunno, Steve. I'd keep that between you and me. If Bruce decides he wants more he'll tell us, but I'm kinda iffy on that front."
"Yeah," Steve sighed. "Maybe you're right."
"I am," Tony said. He clasped Steve's arm. "Don't fall into the trap. Hulk is a good bro but Bruce is right; you've gotta watch him. He'll take whatever you give him, and weasel for more."
"Like what he wants for dinner," Steve moaned.
Tony laughed. "Yeah. Like that. I got it set up, though. The caterers'll have it ready by 11 tonight. Just in time for our Green Bean to dig in."
"Can't believe you found someone to cook that...stuff," Steve mumbled. He ran a hand down his face. "You got it so damn fast."
"Oh? Didn't you know?" Tony plastered on his sharkiest, snarkiest grin and held out his hand. "Hi, I'm Tony Stark. I get shit done."
Syzygy - An AU of Infundo (post-Infundo Chronicles).
Chapter 4: Food for Thought
Chapter 4 Summary: Test results and lots of fast food bring about dangerous breakthroughs and cautious conclusions.
Link to Chapter 1, 2, 3
**
With the three of them working more earnestly than before, Bruce allowed a few tests that week that he would've normally nixed. Like using Tony's idea of fasting, which worked. A little too well, actually, since yes Hulk did make an appearance. Hulk was none too happy about starving "chubby Banner" ("Hey, at least he didn't say 'puny,'" Tony told Bruce, after the fact). Some small comfort, he supposed.
"What did I say?" Bruce growled. It wasn't much of a growl, though. He was too tired to be any more menacing than a kitten. "Now we're back to square one."
"No, we're not."
“According to what logic?”
Tony had that look in his eye, the one Bruce hated, the one of foreboding and horribly dark mysteries. Tony tapped his lip as he paced the Hulk Room. "Well, you were out, so you didn't hear all of us talking."
Bruce blinked blearily at him. "Who?"
"Me, Steve, and Hulk. We had a long conversation."
Bruce stared at him like he'd grown a third head. "You what?"
"Oh, don't act like that. You know he's nowhere near as clueless as you'd like him to be and he knows exactly what we're doing. Exactly."
Bruce gulped when Tony came nearly nose-to-nose with him while sporting a maniacal grin. "And I think he understands 'your' body better than you do."
"He most certainly does not," Bruce fired back, affronted and downright indignant. "I'd like to see his degrees in biochemistry and biophysics."
"Hah. He doesn't need 'em," Tony said. He winked at Bruce and pulled back from Bruce's space. "He just told me he's Santa Claus. 'Cause he sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake."
"That's not at all ominous." Bruce ran a hand under his chin, "feeling" the Hulk's deep chuckle inside his core. At the same time Steve sauntered in carrying no fewer than ten take-out bags, and Bruce's hunger took over. "Gimme," he commanded, grasping the air.
Grinning, Steve tossed a bag over and Bruce tore into the first sandwich he found. He ravenously wolfed down three large bites before saying another word. "Mmm. Yes. And Tony, I was already goin' over it in my head--"
"Sure ya were."
"Shut up. I was." Bruce realized he was being mean but he was starving, dammit. He shoved the rest of the burger in his mouth and groped for fries. "Did you get--"
"Shakes," Steve said, handing him a nondescript bag, suspiciously different from the others. But Bruce didn’t care and tore into the bag, immediately clutching hold of a frosty shake. He began gulping it like water and missed the small exchange between Tony and Steve.
"Mmm," Bruce moaned. He ogled the container. "Why's this so delicious?"
"Additives," Tony said, grinning at Steve. "Courtesy of Mean Green. He knew you'd like 'em."
"Swirled in sweetened condensed milk," Steve admitted. "With malted milk powder, melted fudge, flavored syrup and a heavy cream whip."
"And the pièce de résistance, two scoops of the gainer recipe you invented."
Bruce knit his brows and paused as he slurped down the dregs of the frozen treat. "I was still analyzing the compounds."
"Well, fine, but Hulk knew your formula was ready to go, chilling in your office fridge. He told us so we could put your hypothesis to good use when you shrunk back."
"He had no right," Bruce growled, but he rooted around another bag for some fries. "Wasn't finished with the clinical trials."
"Probably thought you needed a push," Tony said, smirking. He fed Bruce another hamburger so he could two-fist his fries with a burger.
"Hulk gave us some good ideas," Steve said, and his face was flushed as he watched Bruce down his food with gusto. "Including the sleeping problem."
"Wha' sheepin' prob'em?" It was tough to understand Bruce with his fat cheeks chipmunk full, and the angry look on his face bordered on comical.
"He knows how to make you sleepwalk," Tony said.
"And sleep eat," Steve clarified. "In fact, he's done it before."
Bruce's eyes shrunk to angry slits as he swallowed his mouthful. He chomped into his fries, ferociously shaking his head. "That's abusive. I didn't consent."
"He said he only did it once, when you were passed out from hunger in India, or some other remote place. He had to, or you'd've died." Bruce tore into his sandwich, jaw working bitterly at Tony's revelation. "He can still access that part of your brain but he promised not to, unless you're willing to let him."
"That's an unacceptably high risk," Bruce complained. Steve offered him a soda and he snatched it from him. "That fuckin' sneaky motherfucker--"
"Bruce," Tony sighed. "He's asking you now. He could've done it without you but he told us, so we could ask on his behalf. So do you want his help, or not?"
Bruce made a face, even as Steve handed him fries and another shake, and he swirled his fries in the thick chocolate malt. "That's not the point," Bruce said, pouting.
"I think you're just mad he came up with it and you didn't."
Bruce rolled his eyes and screwed up his face, looking way closer to the Hulk than Tony figured Bruce would've liked. "Not. Even. Remotely. True."
"Quit fussing and finish your food," Steve said, not unkindly. But he was hiding his laugh.
Bruce fumed and suffered silently as he systematically worked through the food bags, but he begrudgingly agreed with their assessment. It solved an issue he'd been mulling over, regarding the night feedings. He'd originally considered an IV but Hulk's admission could potentially produce a better result. But doing so meant giving Hulk unconscious control, and Bruce scoffed at the very notion. He and Hulk had boundaries for a reason. Giving Him absolute control wore those boundaries painfully thin.
"Let me think about it," He murmured while forlornly poking the depleted bags of food. "But is there...any more? I'm, ah. I think I'm still pretty hungry."
"Sure there is," Steve said. He smirked at Tony while tossing another bag to Bruce.
Bruce's eyes widened. Along with extra burgers and fries Steve added one of his favorites, Shake Shack's specialty frozen concrete dessert.
Yum.
"Mmm," he sighed, finally calming down. He hiccuped twice and rubbed his belly. Well, he supposed he could conclude that the gainer formula worked better than he expected - he was definitely hungrier than after a normal Hulk-out, and he could choke down twice as much (the double-SmokeShack burgers and sodas, fries, shakes, and desserts barely made a dent).
But only time would tell if nightly feedings would help or harm.
**
The week's next weigh-in yielded better results and Bruce was nearly satisfied.
"There we go," Tony crowed. "Two and a half kilos. That's definitely progress. At this rate, you'll be where you want in twenty or so months. Not bad."
Steve was over the moon while sporting a goofy grin and Bruce, although quite pleased, realized he had more options.
"Good," he huffed. He tugged at his tighter belt, determined that this would be the last week he could fit in his current khakis. "But I can do better. So I'm in."
"In, as in--?"
"Hulk and I agreed. I'm gonna let him take the reins," he said. "Starting tonight."
Syzygy - An AU of Infundo (post-Infundo Chronicles).
Chapter 3: Indulgences and Definitions
Chapter 3 Summary: Bruce has two individual epiphanies with his partners.
Link to Chapter 1, 2
Author notes: Sorry for the last minute late post - but yes, still keeping the posting schedule to Tuesdays for the most part.
**
Bruce stirred from sleep still a bit stuffed and rubbed his belly. He was sore all over from everything they'd done but it was a good feeling; he felt warm, loved, and safe...and maybe a little hungry? Was it possible he felt hungry and stuffed at -- he glanced at the clock -- 3:30 in the morning?
He pondered it before preparing to roll himself from the bed. In the beginning of their relationship he'd slept between Steve and Tony, but as big as he’d gotten he clung to their bed’s edges now, becoming the big or (not-so) little spoon to them. Because he was so huge it was impossible not to wake Tony or Steve if he got up in the middle of the night.
He loved their ridiculously comfortable bed though, and had second thoughts about leaving it despite his hunger pangs. A tiny smirk teased his lips. We'll need a sturdier bed later. Random future thoughts of bed-bound joy shot tiny, happy currents of electricity through his body. It took longer than average to do every day tasks like getting out of bed or sitting down despite being mostly mobile now. But future him wouldn't need to worry about such nonsense things.
Bruce’s gut rumbled and groaned, echoing his greedy, lustful appetite. Giving his stomach a small placating pat, Bruce rocked, scooted and shifted his demanding body off the mattress. When Tony softly grunted and Steve's breathing hitched Bruce froze, wondering if he'd woken them. But no. He sighed softly as they returned to their regular sleeping patterns after a beat. Besides, if they did wake for whatever reason they'd know where he'd be and they could join him in the kitchen.
He grabbed his robe (a robe that barely fit, the same robe Tony and Steve swaddled on cold nights) and slowly shuffled to the closest kitchen. He'd be out of breath halfway, but no matter; he had a feeling Tony would cobble together a kitchenette off their bedroom, once walking became too bothersome.
Humming, Bruce grabbed fried chicken, gravy, mashed potato leftovers and the corn casserole from the fridge and loaded his plate. For good measure he also grabbed ice cream, chocolate cake, and a spoon, nibbling on the sweets while the dinner foods warmed in the microwave. His mind wandered as he waited. A nightly feeding routine had merit. Doing would exhaust him, but he’d consider it. He could sleep during the day. Or catnap.
Alternately, he could modify a sumo wrestler’s diet to fit his needs, but he had a sneaking suspicion he was already consuming more calories than the average sumo, just to maintain his weight.
Steve was right. The answer was in front of them, somewhere. So maybe, if he combined Tony and Steve's ideas with his own, and reexamined the Hulk threshold, maybe adding a nightly feeding schedule to boot...
Hmm. It might work.
"Muffin?"
Bruce smiled at Steve's sleepy grin and popped another spoonful of chocolate cake and ice cream in his mouth. "Just got a little peckish."
"So I see." Steve's sleepy grin morphed into something diabolical. "Sit," he said, gesturing at a bar stool at the kitchen island. "You shouldn't waste extra energy by preparing your own meals." Bruce's stool was a little more squat than the others and heavily reinforced. Tony threatened to make the other stools the same for symmetry's sake but he'd never gotten around to it. Bruce honestly didn't mind. He liked having his "own" kitchen seat.
He snorted at Steve's quip and calmly watched the man grab a bowl from the cabinet; Steve wouldn't let him off the hook until he sat and obeyed him.
"So, Bruce. What's got you up at this hour, besides food?"
"Is it that obvious?"
"More than." He grabbed the hot food from the microwave as Bruce piled ice cream into a bowl and added his toppings - the "good" ice cream toppings, according to Tony.
Steve put the ice cream back in the freezer and gestured to Bruce's food. "Eat up. And tell me what's bothering you."
Bruce hummed appreciatively. He took time to answer, though. He wolfed down half his food before gently clearing his throat. "The pros and cons, I suppose," he murmured.
"Of what Tony's proposing?"
Nodding, Bruce took a few big bites from the chicken before loading up his spoon with the corn dish. "That, and more. I have some ideas, and I think I have something that might work."
"Oh?"
Bruce smirked and shoveled the corn casserole into his mouth. "Mmf," he said, mouth half full. "It's half of what's bugging me."
Steve watched him finish his chicken and casserole before silently piling more mashed potatoes to his plate. "Thanks."
Steve went to the fridge and dumped shredded cheese and butter pats to the rest of Bruce's heated mashed potatoes. "What's the other half, then?"
Bruce twirled his fork through the cheese and fluffed it together, and as he ate small contented noises rose from his throat. "Ooh, yeah. Perfect," he snuffled before scarfing it. "Mm. 'Kay. So...it's cosmetic."
"Cosmetic?"
"Yeah." Bruce’s fork scraped across his empty plate and he mechanically dug into the cake and ice cream, missing Steve slyly replenishing his dessert whenever Bruce looked close enough to finishing. "It took me this long to appear 'human' to people; to be normal. Sure, I'm pretty hefty, but I'm still functionally normal." He belched behind a curved fist before returning to his plate. He tucked into his next helping of cake and spoke with his mouth full. "I get a few odd stares now, but they're the stares guys my size normally get. I kinda get a kick out of that, to be honest."
Steve chuckled right along with him and grabbed chocolate sauce from the fridge. "So? What's the real issue?"
"The real issue," Bruce sighed, loading up his fork. "Is the monster I see myself bec...oh, that is amazing." He finally realized Steve heated up the chocolate sauce, then poured it over his cake and ice cream. His double chin quivered as he shoved giant bites in his mouth, trying to get in every last crumb of deliciousness.
"Don't choke yourself," Steve teased. But his small smile quickly faded. "You're not a monster. You know that."
Bruce shrugged, but he didn't say anything else until his fork clattered across the empty dessert plate. "Not consciously, no. But I've gotta ask myself, am I coming to terms with it? Is it so bad to be one, really? To own it? I'm not a hundred percent human - and neither are you," he amended, when Steve tried interrupting. "Or half of the Avengers, if we really think about it. Even Tony's genius puts him out of the human category, into something more like super...hm. Super humanity."
"Super human?"
"No. That phrase is trite and beyond overdone. Super humanity has more heart, and creates a space for people like us, as well as others." He pat his full stomach, feeling more at ease, momentarily mesmerized at how his huge belly jiggled with each pat. "I've begun owning the word 'fat,'" he mumbled, squeezing his rolls beneath his strained pajama top. "Maybe I can reclaim the word 'monster,' too."
"I'm sure you can, if anyone can do it," Steve said. He opened the freezer back up and took out the ice cream, and grabbed a fresh spoon. "But you're still my Muffin regardless. So let me make sure you're good and full before you wake up again, because you’re hungry."
Bruce smiled softly and opened his mouth as Steve spoon fed him the rest of the ice cream.
***
Still, that night got Bruce thinking; the key wasn't one individualized goal. Maybe, like a monster, he could go all out. Let the journey take flight on its own. He could hang on for the ride and chart its progress.
Dangerous thinking, Banner, he cautioned. The last time he metaphorically let it ride, he had a Hulk for his trouble. But maybe having three consciences would bring out better circumstances. Among the three of them he had a brain, a heart, and a moral compass...which was a darn sight better than just a brain.
"Earth to Bruce. Again."
"Hm?" Bruce snapped up from the book he wasn't reading. His head was nestled in Tony's lap, while Tony played with his curls. Steve had risen from the other end of the couch to gather snacks from the kitchen, so their dog occupied the warm divot Steve's butt left behind.
"You were saying?"
"I said," Tony murmured, kissing Bruce's forehead. "That I noticed you and Spangles made a small night of it. Without me."
"I wouldn't go that far," Bruce said honestly. "I got hungry and Steve and I talked over a few things."
"Oh, really?" Bruce could feel Tony's jealous streak rearing up. He put his book down, and took Tony's hand.
"Nothing major, promise. I told him I wanted to reclaim the word 'monster.' To use it, but in my own way."
"You're not--"
"No, wait. Hear me out." He'd already made peace with the word after his discussion with Steve, but he should've told Tony sooner. It was wrong of him not to. "I'm going to become someone 'otherworldly.' Monstrously huge’, as it were. But I want the opportunity to put my humanity on equal footing with the Hulk. It sounds...weird, but I don't know how else to describe it." He sighed, suddenly wanting another plate of cookies. "I guess I'm making peace with the Other Guy by becoming more like him, in human form. I'm almost excited at the prospect, to be honest. Maybe it'll help us understand one another more."
"Huh," Tony murmured after a long beat. A crooked smile passed on his lips. "I never thought about it that way."
"So...it's not such a crazy idea?" Bruce grunted. Some of his apprehension drained away with Tony’s approval. "There's merit to it, right?"
"Absolutely." Tony squeezed his shoulder. "But now that we're all on the same page, it's time to kick this into full gear. It's been a while since you used yourself as a live test subject - and I know your concerns," Tony interrupted, seeing the deepening crease across Bruce's brow. "But we've got this, babe. Let's pour through your notes and come up with some cool ideas."
* *
Part four: https://burlybanner.tumblr.com/post/186177528669/syzygy-4
Author Notes - this can be read as a conclusion to Infundo Chronicles but I’ll probably still write more in this universe from time to time. When I set out to write this particular story I didn’t expect it to be the last, but it seemed fitting. Stories and universes can sometimes close on their own and as a writer I can respect that, but I do love this version of Bruce, Tony, and Steve together. So it’s a peaceful place to stop.
I’ll still answer questions about them (and maybe do a little RPing if people want) but for now, I wish them well.
***
Full Circle, an Infundo Fic (Stark Spangled Chubby!Banner)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2480
Warnings: None
***
Non, rien de rien
Non, je ne regrette rien
C'est payé, balayé, oublié
Je me fous du passé !
--Michel Vaucaire (sung by Edith Piaf)
They respected his right to keep his past tightly-guarded. They also knew he never discussed his adolescence, apart from what they’d already read in public files. And yes, to be fair all three of them had “issues,” but their conversations would end in a Fort Knox lockdown if they nagged him for answers about his past. And somewhere dark in him, Bruce figured Hulk’s creation could’ve stemmed from crushing daddy issues (Brian Banner’s uxoricide and atrocities guaranteed a life of depression and suicidal ideation, too).
The public treated him like a circus sideshow before the Hulk emerged, even since he was a little kid, so yeah Tony and Steve guessed he still had a few unvoiced problems. Yet they never pressed him to talk unless his depression took a sudden dive.
He loved them for that.
“Did you know?” Bruce whispered softly. His low voice trembled in Tony’s ear, causing Tony to grunt and tighten a grip on “his” portion of Bruce’s prodigious paunch. Trailers from the last movie streamed mutely to the sleepy thirds, recommending movies Bruce put on his “to view later” list.
On his left Steve’s snores teased a giggle from Bruce’s throat. He’d gotten much too fat to comfortably view Steve from his side unless he moved his entire body (which he wouldn’t, for fear of waking him), but Bruce could feel the ebb and flow of Steve’s chest with each breath. The noises calmed Bruce and kept him comfortably grounded.
But apart from the grunt, Tony had barely moved. Bruce’s excess body heat had turned their ridiculously wide couch into pockets of therapeutic warmth, perfect for the chilly morn, and Tony refused to shift off of Bruce’s lap. The sectional was nearly as comfortable as their bed but on nights when they ate junk and stayed up late watching quadruple features, everyone elected to sleep on the couch.
“Shh, Brucie,” Tony slurred. He sighed as Bruce finger combed his hair. “Sleep now, dear. Muse later.”
“Mhm.” Bruce chuckled when Tony snuggled deeper into his stomach, squeezing and fluffing the fat like his own personal pillow. In response Bruce swirled his sausage-thick fingers through Tony’s hair, lulling the engineer back to sleep.
“I saw that very movie in college,” Bruce mumbled once Tony snuffled in his sleep. “Back when I finally won enough scholarship money for my books, tuition, housing, and a seven-day meal plan.” His fingers methodically and unconsciously tapped Tony’s scalp. “Betty and I argued a lot back then but our arguments waned after we saw that movie. ‘Of course I still love you,’ she’d said, ‘but you’ve got to do something. You look way too much like him.’“
Bruce frowned and gentled his hands in Tony’s hair. If he got too rough Tony’d wake and he didn’t want that. “That’s when I made some tough decisions,” he murmured. “Looking back, I honestly don’t think I wanted to. But I changed anyway. For her.”
Confessing--well half-confessing, since he hoped his words were vague enough so no one would understand him--helped loosen the gut-knot he’d ignored for years.
Go figure.
Bruce ran a hand beneath his glasses, sighing. He really should turn in. The clock on the TV read four-something-am and yeah, it was technically Saturday, but still--
“Wait, what?”
Nuts. Bruce swallowed. “Um...you’re dreaming. Go back to sleep, Tony.”
“Nuh, uh, no. We’re not playing that card.” Tony yawned and rolled up like a cat, propping his elbow behind the couch so he could stare Bruce eye to bloodshot eye. Bruce smiled a little and pulled back one of Tony’s stray hairs to de-emphasize his lover’s bedhead.
“There’s no card. We need get some decent sleep because we stay up too late on weekends as it is. So next time, I say we stick to double features when teaching Steve twentieth century culture. And we start earlier in the day.”
“The eighties rule, and those movies’re Lays potato chips - try to watch just one, I dare you.” Bruce smirked, conceding Tony’s point. “But that’s neither here nor there, big guy. And you’re forgetting that One, I’m a light sleeper. And Two, a genius.”
“A genius at staying up way too late.”
“And a genius at peering through other geniuses smokescreens.”
“Touche.”
“Hey, hey,” Steve grumbled. Bruce shut his eyes, internally groaning. He could verbally spar with Tony to get him off the scent, but not him and Steve.
Steve sniffed and hid a yawn in a curved fist. “What time is it?”
“Between astronomical and civil dawn.”
Steve blinked. “What--?”
“4:30 a.m-ish,” Tony translated. He gave Bruce a hard stare. “And our boy Brucie is playing dumb while attempting to evade my questions.”
Steve looked adorably rumpled and rather childlike the seconds before fully wakening, but his clueless innocence didn’t last long. Bruce sank lower into the couch as concern and anger clouded Steve’s expression.
“Why?”
“I’m thinkin’ it had something to do with the last movie, but he’s not budging.”
“The movie with that really cute guy, with the cute name?”
Tony grinned. “Yeah.”
“C’mon, that had to be a stage name.”
“What, John Candy? Nope. Real name.”
“Son of a gun.”
Bruce hoped they’d continue, or at least leave him alone enough so they’d ignore him. “I’m just tired,” he deflected, yawning for emphasis. “We should table this for another time - really, it’s nothing.”
“No we’re gonna have it out now, because you’re too good at diverting us from the truth.” Bruce rolled his eyes. “Stop it. I know your game, Banner. You might as well ‘fess up.”
Worse, Steve kneaded Bruce’s side like a giant soothing cat, breaking concentration and resolve. “C’mon, muffin,” Steve sang, softly kissing Bruce’s jawline. “No judgments here.”
Bruce exchanged gazes with both of the men. “All right, all right. Fine...but don’t make a giant deal out of this, okay?”
“Promise,” Tony said, and Bruce glared daggers. “I said I wouldn’t! Sheesh.”
Bruce ignored his retort. “Steve...?”
“I’ll try,” Steve mumbled.
Bruce thinned his lips and ran his hands through his hair, hardening his expression. “This is tough for me, okay? So don’t...blow this out of proportion.”
“We won’t, we won’t,” Tony growled. He made the universal, “hurry up” gesture with his hand. “Just spit it out.”
Bruce glowered at his partners once before staring at his hands. “O...kay. Okay. For a year or two in college,” he breathed, mentally preparing himself, “I was...pretty tubby.” His gaze shot up as Steve squeaked, but when he saw delight marching across his lover’s faces he held up a hand. “Ah, no! I told you, don’t make a big deal out of this!”
“Like...how tubby?” Tony asked, and his nefarious grin nearly split his skull. Steve nervously chewed his lips, not daring to make another sound. “Big as you are now? Or--”
Bruce shut his eyes. “I don’t even know why I bother,” he mumbled. Then, “Almost, maybe. Since one of my scholarships provided unlimited cafeteria meals as long as I maintained my honors GPA, I made up for my strict childhood by gobbling up every fried, sugary, and fatty treat I could get my hands on. I took full advantage of the all-you-can-eat buffets on campus including the ones open after midnight, and I was determined to get my money’s worth.”
He quietly fiddled with the hem on his shirt cuff, thankful that his partners kept quiet after his rebuff. “Maybe in one sense I was afraid. Afraid that someone had made a clerical error, and I’d lose my literal meal ticket. I justified the gorging, telling myself the free food was temporary. When you’re poor,” he said, suddenly solemn, “you don’t question ‘free’ or ‘extra.’ You take what you can, when you can.”
The room stilled, and Bruce suddenly heard the quiet background noises of their home; Lily lapping from her water dish, Jarvis’ temperature modulations, the exhales of surprise from his companions.
Time to change the atmosphere.
“In short,” Bruce said lightly, attempting to brighten the mood, “I gained the freshman two fifteen instead of the freshman fifteen.”
“And Betty wasn’t happy about it.”
Bruce shook his head. “I didn’t want to lose her, so I slimmed down until she was happy with me again. And anyway,” he muttered, shifting awkwardly on the couch, “thrift stores didn’t really carry my size and I couldn’t afford anything new. So that ended that.”
“But you liked it,” Steve murmured, his voice caught somewhere between awe and reverence. Bruce wasn’t sure if the awe came from him being 215+ pounds overweight in college or something else. “That’s what it was, wasn’t it? You liked being fat.”
Bruce shifted again. “I...um. Well, honestly? ‘Like’ isn’t a strong enough word. I...ah. I loved it.” He stared at his thick hands, feeling the embarrassment flood him, even now. “It felt great to be that chubby. I felt powerful. I felt in charge of my destiny and in control of my life. I...enjoyed how my mass shifted and jiggled with each footfall. How my steps caused furniture to quake and rattle. How people couldn’t ignore me.” He heard a small squeak, and immediately narrowed his eyes. “Steve. Don’t turn this into something weird.”
“I’m not, I--It’s just, it’s--um...it’s--”
“Nah, you broke him, Pooh Bear.” Tony grinned like a shark and tweaked Bruce’s double chin before sobering. “I could make some quip about the Hulk, but I won’t. And while I’m sorry Betty made you lose your weight class and you went back to fighting featherweight--”
“Lightweight.”
“--whatever weight, it was still wrong of her to force it on you. I like that you liked bein’ a hunky chunky and that you’re finally getting to enjoy it, twenty-plus years later.” He rubbed the back of his neck and got quiet. “Makes me feel less like a creeper, anyway.”
Both Steve and Bruce frowned but only Bruce responded. “A...what? Why?”
Tony paused as an uncharacteristic blush tinted his cheeks. “Hm. Well...I ran my own little tests on you, Banner. My mind loved watching your weight shoot up so I casually recommended some meal ideas to our cooks. I told them to tweak the recipes to keep you large, and in charge.”
Bruce gently reached for Tony’s hand and gave him a gentle peck on the lips. “Thanks for telling me but if I’d minded I would’ve said something.” Tony snorted, looking bashfully at a corner of the room. “Trust me, my taste buds are so heightened that I can tell if there’s extra cream or another additive. It makes my meals extra delicious so I enjoy overeating to savor every bite.”
“Ohhh...” An unconscious moan dropped from Steve’s lips. Tony rolled his eyes even as Bruce grabbed Steve’s hand.
“You’re both ridiculous,” Bruce huffed. “But I love you anyway.” Bruce brought both their hands to his lips, kissing them. “I was destined to blow up. I just had to have the right company and the right motivation.”
“So...you’re not mad?”
Bruce looked pensive. “No, not really. Maybe disappointed you weren’t initially up front with me, but it’s okay. But let me know from here on out.
“In fact,” he sighed again, shifting his belly. He briefly pawed it, smirking at the bounce in his lap. “I think I’m nearing the point where I want to level out.”
“Aw, honest?”
“Steve, don’t be too upset.” A small smile pinked Bruce’s lips. “It was inevitable; you know I can’t keep gaining forever.” He gently rubbed Steve’s hand. “My human body is hitting some hard limits and it’s becoming difficult to move comfortably. I can’t walk too far - and running’s definitely out - but I’d like to be able to at walk around the house without a variety of ambulatory aids, y’know?”
“Yeah, I get it.” Steve pouted, causing Bruce to laugh. “I’ll miss measurement nights, though.”
Bruce winked at him. “I might not want to actively gain but I’m not planning on losing anything. So feel free to keep me in this range, plus or minus ten pounds.”
Steve’s expression brightened. “That I could do.”
“It’s a compromise, I’m sure. But I consider myself fluffy enough for your whims.”
“Stop,” Tony interrupted, laughing at their schmaltz. “No more, I’m done. I’m going to bed.”
“I think we should all turn in. It’s pretty late.”
“Early, you mean.” Steve offered his hand. Bruce took the help, rocking back and forth so the momentum could launch him from the couch’s deep divots. Steve smiled softly. His expression lingered on Bruce’s massive torso and on the button-down shirt with strained seams. “You need some new work shirts, Muffin.”
“Yeah. Maybe later today or tomorrow.”
“Shopping?” Tony yawned grandly and wrapped his arms around Bruce’s sides, though his fingers were more than a foot from connecting. Bruce chuckled as Tony slammed his head into his back, snuggling close. “Shopping’s my second favorite hobby.”
“And your first?”
“You blind, Banner? It’s you. And Steve, in a pinch.”
“In a pinch, huh? Thanks.”
“You two,” Bruce murmured. He motioned Steve over and stilled as both men wrapped around him in a cocoon of arm warmth. “My guys.”
“Always and forever,” Steve mumbled, and Bruce felt Tony nod against his back.
“Sleep now,” Tony said. “It’s chilly, and I need my Bruce-powered bed warmer.”
“You got it.”
They changed into comfortable clothes and tumbled into bed with Bruce between them. Bruce exhaled a loud, contented sigh as both Tony and Steve scooted into his body, cuddling snugly into his fat. He briefly reminiscent about his life, about the beginning of their time as a trio until now, and realized he was happier than he had any right to be. “Love you,” he whispered to them. He smiled after feeling a gentle whump while Lily found her sleep spot, completing their family.
Bruce mouthed you too to their pup, then settled into his own peaceful slumber.
Dose Bruce ever fell asleep while eating ( I actually done that in primary school it got me more builled) also dose lilly ever bit Bruce's fat like a little toy also what nicknames dose Tony or Steve or heck even lilly have for Brucie's big fabulous gut ( that Imagined in my school because I got know pillows so it felt like it)
I think if Bruce pushes himself in his lab (and does marathon science with Tony), there’s a good chance he might fall asleep while eating snacks - or if he stays up way too late watching a movie with the guys and dozes off, he might have something in his hands, but for the most part he probably doesn’t.
Lily doesn’t bite Bruce’s flab but she does like cuddling into it. He’s really warm, and the perfect sized pillow for her!
When Bruce’s tummy growls Steve’s the first to take notice (”oh, we’d better take care of that, right now” or “”Hmm, someone’s hungry…we can’t let that go on too long.”). He sometimes calls Bruce’s tum “Mr. Fluffy” when they’re going to bed and he wants to lay on his chest, but Tony gives him a hard time when he says it.
( haha thx dude but one boy at school who is in my class is cool~ and I go to a special needs school i hate yelling and loud noises so it help the teachers are real funny and nice and 2 love marvel one actually stop the class to talk marvel with me because he saw my drawings bruce and Tony ) also what dose happen when they make are chubby brucie wait for his food
(Any time, m’dear!(.
Ooh, it is *not* a good idea to make Bruce wait for food these days.
If it happens, he usually has a shorter temper and it’s harder for him to control the Hulk (the Hulk doesn’t like waiting for food either, and he’s become accustomed to Bruce’s daily feeding schedule). Bruce won’t throw a tantrum, per se, but he won’t be happy about it. There’s a Snickers commercial about people not being themselves when they’re hungry. That’s Bruce, times 11.
And when Bruce does eat, he usually eats more than usual…to make up for the lost calories from waiting so long.
thx my school is just full of FUCKIN BITCHES) dose lily and Bruce ever eat together like Bruce waiting for his i diot and his ice cream pop and him lilly might eat a meat pizzes and a couple of ice pops get it anyway love your tumblr you were actually one of the first ones I ever followed and I read all your story's top to bottem and they make me so happy because a couple of months ago I heard what I thought weremy friends talking behind my back in the locker room and I still see at school
(I’m sorry you’re having so many issues at school! That can be the worst. :( I’m rooting for you, though - if you can get through this, you can get through anything. You’re strong! If it helps, imagine chubby!Bruce with you, holding you tight and protecting you from the people who don’t know any better. Sending him your way for protection!)
If neither Tony nor Steve are home when he arrives (rare, but it sometimes happens), Bruce usually cooks - but it takes too long to wait for dinner. Usually he’ll get into the snacks before food is ready, and feed Lily her dinner, then he’ll take her for a quick stroll to do her “business” (he’s usually munching on a light snack or a sandwich then, too). By the time he gets back with Lily he’s really hungry, and hopefully the food is ready, too. If not…well, another “quick” snack won’t hurt any.
It’s hard to keep Bruce full these days, so grazing is usually what he does all day if he’s not doing research, teaching or sleeping. And he eats in the lab - which he really shouldn’t do - but he makes sure the food won’t create crumbs or hurt any of his experiments. Bags of M&Ms are easy to dump in his mouth after opening - and they create very little mess.
