Summary: From the beginning, Dean and Cas continue to find their way together over and over.
Chuck keeps erasing it.
Commentary: What if, simmilarly to the way some of the SPN crew tried to make Dean and Cas show their feelings on screen, only to be cut or eddited out, Dean and Cas tried again and again to be together, only to have Chuck rewritte over them?
This story is basically tons of first kisses and first times, over all the seasons, tying together on a very satisfying and well thought out ending.
I find myself coming back to this fanfic again and again to read some of my favorite scenes. I love the way it is written and I love the expansion on lore - it ties in with canon so nicely! Chuck wins, but they find a way.
word count: 1.1k, i’m so sorry i don’t know what this mess is like this is all over the place
He had always loved the way the sun glinted off her windshields. He’d be walking out from a frustrating interview, zero leads in sight, and stop to admire her. All golden in the light, the silver glinting on the wheels blinding him. He could stare at her for hours, get lost in the solid black finish.
The best part about her was that he didn’t have as many bad memories tied to her. Well, not childhood ones anyway. John was normally in a good mood while they were driving. He would let Dean pick out the tapes and smile when he always chose Zeppelin.
Inside that car, he was safe.
It wasn’t like the motel rooms. Every time he walked into them the stench of whiskey hit him and he could see himself laying on the floor, hands above his head, trying to fend off his father’s angry blows. He could feel the fear, the shame, the blinding pain. He would still look behind him and make sure Sammy was okay. Every single time they walked into a shoddy motel room. Because they reminded him… he had to keep Sam safe. Even from the people that were supposed to protect them.
Baby wasn’t like the dirty truckstop bathrooms they were forced to stop in. Sam didn’t know that every time he walked into them he could feel himself being forced to his knees. Could feel the tears start to spike in his eyes while he forced himself to remember that he had to do this. He had to put food on the table for Sam. So it didn’t matter. Didn’t matter if they went too far, didn’t listen to him, had him gasping for air. He did it anyway. He had to.
She was safe. Away from the hurt, the trauma, everything he kept bottled up. It wasn’t like nothing bad had ever happened in Baby. But mostly, the bad memories, the fights, they were just words. And even words were safe here.
Maybe that was why it was in the Impala Dean had finally decided to tell Sam all those years ago. Why he’d looked over at him, one day while they were driving, and blurted out that he liked men as well as women. It had felt safe. Sam had smiled, said something about how he supported Dean no matter what and he was proud of him. When they’d gotten out of the car, though, they’d left it there. Every time Sam tried to bring it up he shut it down. The Impala was safe. Outside, he could never be himself.
Baby was his safe place. Which is why it was only fitting that she was the last thing Chuck took away.
First it was the world. Sam, Dean, Cas, and Jack watched it go up in smoke. Then, it was the angels. And once they were gone, Heaven collapsed in a flash of blinding light. Hell was right after that, and Chuck didn’t even blink twice when he snapped it out of existence. Purgatory had gone when all the monsters were gone, and likewise, the Empty followed suit. Billie along with it.
Chuck had kept his promise. This really was the end. No resurrections, no last minute plans, no saving the world. There wasn’t a world to save. They just couldn’t stop him. He was all-powerful, more so than they’d ever imagined. After he’d tricked Amara into captivity, he’d had free reign to play with his toys, make them suffer in every way imaginable.
But he was tired of playing now. Dean looked into his eyes, trying to steal himself. He wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. Wouldn’t let him know that he had already broke them. Wouldn’t let him know that he would give anything to be snapped out of existence right now. Before Chuck took his family too. Before he burned this tiny little patch of Earth that he had left standing. Before he took his safe space, the one that was still sort of glowing, even with the sun gone.
Maybe Chuck heard his thoughts, because he turned to him and smiled. Then he snapped again, and Sam and Jack blinked away.
“No!” Dean screamed, finally breaking his silence.
“It’s gone, Dean. It’s all gone. You lost,” Chuck said. “And now, I’m going to take Castiel. He loved you, you know? That’s how he could have been truly happy, not that the deal matters anymore. Dean turned to Cas, saw the angel’s eyes filled with tears, but before he could answer Chuck snapped again.
“I’m bored. So bored with all of these little worlds, all of your little problems. Earth was my worst idea. Creation wasn’t. So it’s time to start again. You get it, right? I mean, you never really thought you had a chance against me, did you?”
“Go to hell,” Dean muttered.
Chuck snorted. “Right. I’ll just,” he looked around and spread his hands wide, “get to it.”
Dean didn’t answer. Maybe he was too numb to speak at this point. Chuck walked over to the car and patted her hood fondly. “Bet you’re wondering why I kept her to the end.”
“Not really,” Dean spat. Maybe he had some breath in him still. Or maybe it hadn’t hit him yet. That Sam, Jack, Cas, the entire world was all gone.
“I love this car, Dean. You and Sam were a great story, but Baby,” Dean cringed at the word. It sounded so vile in his mouth. “Well, she was a stroke of genius. I mean,” he took a deep breath, looking up at the sky of nothing, “the poetry of you and Sam being each other’s home. Of always being on the road. Of this car being your only constant… well, I was proud of that.”
Dean didn’t answer, just stared at him, frozen in place.
“But it’s time to start over. So I guess I have to say goodbye.” He rubbed his hand over the car again, smiling almost softly at her. But it wasn’t soft, because behind his eyes there was fire. Pure hatred, lack of any sort of human love. He had created humanity, but he didn’t have any.
Dean took a shaky step toward him. He knew it was pointless, so goddamn pointless, but he had to fight. And Chuck just laughed. A full-body, chilling thing. The sound rang in Dean’s ears, but he took another step. Almost in slow motion, he watched as Chuck raised his fingers to snap.
Chuck stopped laughing, and looked at him in pity. “Goodbye, Dean,” he said with a snap. And with that, the world was gone. The heroes that had fought to save it were no more. It was time to start again.
tag list: [ask to be added or removed... srry for the hot mess y’all]
