"Doctor? What are you doing?" Sparks and swearing, or at least what sounded like swearing echoed under the main floor.
"Trying to incorporate a new method of working to the linguistic process of the Time and Relative Dimension in Space."
He repeated, exasperated.
"I iterated, I am endeavoring myself with the technicalities of the language network of the time and relative space situated in the cosmos. A thing you desserting cerebrum should do as well, you never ponder before proclaiming." She stared, not understanding why he thought his answer made any sense.
"Are yoooou having a stoke?"
This time, he sounded angry. Well, angrier than his usual grumpy. "What the underground of suffering do you imply?"
"Doctor, I have no idea what you’re doing but I think you’re making it worse."
Il ne put s’empêcher de grogner. « N’importe quoi. C’est juste que je comprends pas pourquoi maintenant je peux mettre qu’une seule langue source ! ».
She couldn’t help the surprised look that showed on her face. He tinkered once again with the TARDIS, or at least that’s what Clara concluded since she still couldn’t see him from where she was standing. The doctor always warned her against getting close to the heart of the TARDIS. She did try once to ask him why but the forlorn look he gave her in return was enough of an answer to not pry further.
But this time would have to be an exception. The TARDIS roared and flames sprung up from under the deck. Clara rushed to the ladder, trying to get to the Doctor as quickly as possible. On her way, she grabbed on the dresser the extinguisher he used as a coat rack. He lost the rack in 1923 when he argued with the TARDIS about cable management in the 12th dining room. She never told him where she hid it and he never asked her, too proud to ask for her help.
Before he could finish his thought, Clara removed the security lock on the extinguisher and covered him in foam. She then got to work and managed to tame the flames coming from the control panel. Once everything was under control, she stared at him, her expression a mix of worry and repressed anger.
"What are YOU doing? I’m soaking now and those flames just meant I was on the right track!"
She was about to answer but stopped suddenly. She couldn’t help but start grinning. He looked dumbly at her, one eyebrow raised. "Doctor. Is this an accent I hear?" she said, amused.
He just stood there, baffled. But he couldn’t help the sarcasm dripping from his voice.
"Of course it is, I haven’t gotten Scottish in the last ten seconds."
She shook her head, her smile getting bigger.
"I know you’re Scottish. But you got an accent. As if you weren’t a native speaker. You pronounce words like a Scottish, you sound Scottish but you got an accent!"
He frowned and looked at the panel again.
"Must have turned off the autotune", he whispered to himself, annoyed.
Her smile was getting so big that her eyes almost looked normal sized.
"Don’t tell me the TARDIS usually fixes your accent! Does that mean you actually speak English to me? She isn’t translating your language to mine?"
He almost looked bashful, his usual confidence tinted with a tiny pinch of self-consciousness. "Well of course. I did tell you I spoke five billion languages".
She rolled her eyes, "Which is an obvious lie but I didn’t know you actually spoke to me! I was so sure you were using the TARDIS for translation. That’s why you can make accents and speak foreign languages, the TARDIS doesn’t actually translate what you’re saying!".
The secret was out. He never meant for Clara to know that. He knew he shouldn’t have tried to add that stupid AI feature everyone was talking about. But sometimes the TARDIS was feeling petty and that’s why he almost got executed in 1554 France for talking to the king with "peasant-like and blasphemous words". She translated his words but not quite. And his formal old French was definitively not good enough to not use the TARDIS’ translation. At least that AI feature would have made his words formal, even when she was sabotaging his attempts at being respectful (but honestly, when wasn’t he? People were just easily offended).
Clara got his attention again when she said with indignation in her voice "wait, does that mean you can choose to disable her translation tool? Doctor, I studied French for ten years for my literary studies! Why couldn’t I speak French in France? You said you couldn’t disable it!".
He rolled his eyes as well.
"Because I didn’t want you to embarrass me with your mock French accent"
"It IS a real French accent! You don’t get to tell me it’s not when you use autotune"
He sighed, his eyes shooting daggers at the TARDIS who was subtly scoffing.
"I’m going to fix the autotune. And you get to speak French next time we go to France", she scream-whispered a delighted yes at that. "But you never mention my accent again."
She pondered for a second.
He recovered his tools and meant to go back to the panel when she added,
"It’s a shame though. You sound very cute that way".
He would never admit his cheeks got a bit red at that comment.
He got back to work, assessing the damage. Before focusing on his repairs, he made a mental note to himself to never go to France with Clara ever again.