in one of your ask you talked about Brain going home with the guy from the market as another story. would you elaborate on that love hearing your thoughts and opinions
Hey anon, thank you even though it's mostly a mess of thoughts and rambling!
I just find the whole of 2x06 such an interesting composition of Brian's fears about hypothetical relationship standards versus how he's subconsciously been in one and doesn't even realise it. Like the actual day to day realities of being with someone doesn't seem to phase him. He will flirt, kiss, manhandle Justin in front of everyone no problem. He goes to clubs with him, family dinners with his friends and has no issue being seen with him. And yet the moment someone mentions the dreaded word 'relationship' he freaks the fuck OUT.
This episode tackles him doing exactly that but also let's us see him work through his issues via help from Debbie and self reflect on what he wants and that's so satisfying for me as a fan of his character but also someone who relates to him very much. Ultimately we get him coming to a mature decision by laying all his cards on the table and telling Justin how he feels by being kinda romantic about it without purposefully trying to. Letting him know what to expect from being with him but also setting his own boundaries and comfort levels. That's what we call growth ladies and gentlemen!
When we see britin grocery shopping that's when Brian meets the trick and they're checking each other out. Here we get a taste of Justin's jealousy and uncertainty and Brian's uneasiness over no longer being seen as the stud of liberty avenue when he overhears the trick gossiping about him to another customer. We also hear the dreaded word - RELATIONSHIP.
Cue Justin walking in on them and being crushed as he thought they were actually heading towards being in one. The next morning Brian tries to flirt with Justin at the diner and it's business as usual for him but Justin gives him the cold shoulder. Leading to the conversation where Brian admits the guy meant nothing he doesn't even remember it. Such a huge part of his identity is linked to sex. He enjoys it, the thrill of the chase and being wanted but he also uses it to mask his pain and a way to hurt himself as he admits to Ted in 5x08 when he says he's redefined promiscuity and it doesn't help. This is an example of that Brian's hurt so he uses sex as a way to solve it, Brian only decides to take the guy home AFTER he overhears what he says about him. It wasn't through some intense attraction or desire to be with him like it is with Justin it was simply to ease his bruised ego. This is why I have such an issue with never getting scenes with Britin being emotionally vulnerable with each other and having deep meaningful conversations that don't revolve around their relationship. Any moments where Brian is crying, in pain and allowing himself to seek comfort are with Michael - his dad's return/dad's death/ the cancer speech on the Liberty Ride etc. It would've added so much depth to them and allowed Justin to understand why Brian behaved the way he did sometimes and his reliance on his sexual identity being a mask for his own insecurities.
The ending scene with the rules is one of my favourite moments in their story arc this episode. Brian actually surprises us by admitting to Debbie that he does love Justin and takes her advice on board doing something about it.
I love the whole speech he gives but special mention to the line " The reason I took you in was because you took a bat to head but it's not the reason I want you to stay. Brian's mind is so in fear of relationships and his definition and experience of them ie society/friends/ his parents he doesn't realise the magnitude behind that line of dialogue. He's not just saying that he wants to keep seeing Justin but that he wants him to keep living with him. Back to displaying the merits of being in a relationship and wanting those traits but averse to admitting it. I'm proud of him because he's fully open and honest no bullshit and no lies. He upholds these rules even after their breakup. Just think if the roles were reversed and Brian was the one who cheated on Justin how would he have been treated? The group and Justin don't ever know the extent to which he kept his promise and how much he used the rules as a way to showcase his love as someone who'd never experienced it before. Therefore it wasn't the stereotypical 'I love you' with words he showed it through his actions. So Justin thinking he didn't give a damn and not realising how much he cared was painful :(
The most fascinating parts of Brian's journey for me are the moments where we see him try and come to terms with opening up himself to love, recognising that and taking control of his life and allowing himself to be happy. Learning that being vulnerable or showing his feelings doesn't make him weak but that it makes him strong. Strong enough to overcome his past and choose his own future whatever that may be. What can I say emotionally repressed asshole characters with a heart of gold are my jam <3
