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"Slytherin Chaser Kevin Mulciber scored ten points, passing the quaffle past the Gryffindor keeper."
"Is that Sirius Black on the field, in a skirt? I do not know what the bloody hell-"
"Language, Mr.Pettigrew!"
"Yes, Professor. I do not know what is happening today, but it seems to be distracting the Slytherin team. Gryffindor Chaser James Potter just scored another fifty points for his team while Slytherin Keeper Evan McRosiar was distracted by Sirius Black, dancing in the field. The score is now one hundred and fifty to thirty, in favor of the Gryffindor team.
"Sirius Black seems to be wearing a muggle cheer outfit and waving pom-poms, effectively distracting the Slytherin Keeper and Chasers. Oh, and now it seems that his brother, Regulus Black, Slytherin Seeker, is now flying down to yell at him. And now- ooh, that had to hurt! Gryffindor Beater Frank Longbottom just sent a bludger towards him, and he is out! Sirius Black revived him, and Regulus now seems to be slowly getting back up.
"Gryffindor Seeker Phoebe Dawson has apparently spotted the snitch, as she is now flying upwards into the sky. And Remus Lupin has now run onto the field and appears to be heading to Sirius Black. I believe he is going to attack him as Remus has now tackled him. No- nope. He is not attacking him he seems to be snogging Sirius Black senseless. And now James Potter has stopped looking for the quaffle and is now attempting to pull apart the snogging couple. And Sirius just punched him for trying to stop them. James Potter is now sporting a bloody nose and is flying back to score more goals for his team.
"It seems Regulus Black has spotted something Phobe Dawson hasn't. Oh, and Poebe spotted something else, now she is speeding to the gound, and-
"SHE CAUGHT THE SNITCH! GRYFFINDOR WINS, THREE HUNDRED TO THIRTY!"
"Mr.Pettigrew! Stop Dancing!"
"Yes, professor. And it appears that Remus and Sirius have disappeared from the field, we all now what that means. Wink, wink."