Alone with You Inside My Mind - Yandere!Commodus x Reader
Pairing: Yandere!Commodus x Reader
Word Count: 2,071
Summary: Commodus becomes madly obsessed with the reader after the reader appears in his dreams and comforts the touch-starved prince longing for affection.
"Stay with me tonight?"
"You know I will not." Lucilla sat on the edge of her brother's bed and gently stroked his dark hair, flecked with golden dust. Oh, how Commodus loved her touch. Ever since he lost his mother, the prince had found comfort and solace in his elder sister's embrace. It was the only thing that kept him from scolding the gods for taking his mother away. "Commodus…"
"Yes?"
"Father has arranged it. I am to be married soon."
Commodus looked up, his eyes meeting hers. Her sweet, icy voice cut him like daggers. "But…that's impossible…I-I-I…I need you. Father can't do this."
As if she were comforting a child, Lucilla wiped his eyes with her fingertips. "It's for the good of this family."
"Tearing us apart?"
She sighed. It was no use convincing him, or trying to reason with him. Commodus was always driven by his emotions, despite their father being a stoic. If Commodus's mind were a chariot, it would be driven by a four-year-old wearing a lion skin who cried at the slightest obstacle. Lucilla brought her hands to Commodus's hair and kissed his forehead.
"Sleep well, dear brother."
Commodus watched her leave, his peridot eyes fighting back tears. He thought she would understand his night terrors, his fear of the darkness that wasn't simply a childish trait.
She knew what his darkness entailed. She knew, having comforted him for years as a little boy, letting him sleep in her bed chambers when he was barely up to her knee. And it all came to a halt one day, when their father deemed it inappropriate for a growing prince to 'take shelter from those he ought to be protecting'. His father was certainly right, to a degree; Commodus needed to protect his sister from the evils that could harm them. But how could he protect her when the world insisted on tearing them apart? How could he protect her when she refused to stay by his side, instead of remaining close to her dear brother?
Relentlessly ruminating, Commodus sighed and ambled towards the golden vanity in his chambers. He dipped his fingers into a small pot of lavender-scented oil and dabbed it behind his ears, before covering his face with a thin layer of cream, specifically meant to eliminate blemishes of any kind.
Adjusting his night toga one last time, the prince climbed into bed, under the covers, still engrossed in the memory of his dear sister comforting him in his childhood. Why did she have to go? He closed his eyes, curled into fetal position, shivering in anticipation of the nightmare that would come for him, just as it had always come.
"Commodus…its time…" The demonic, high-pitched voice gleefully teased the prince.
Commodus felt his arms and his legs being bound by something strong, something tight…it couldn't be rope. They could only be demons, holding him at each limb. He felt himself being lifted, glancing down to find nothing but gray cement below him and maniacal laughter everywhere else.
"Where am I going?! Who are you, why are you taking me?" He asked aloud, the panic in his voice increasing with each word. "What's happening? Tell me!"
His pleas were met with even more maniacal laughter…and numerous pairs of red and yellow eyes staring at him with glee. They continued to laugh as they swung Commodus side to side before flinging him into a pit.
"NO! No, please! NO!!!"
The prince was thrown, only to land with a clatter. Commodus gasped, his eyes darting about…was he surrounded by bones? But before he could look any more, he heard the sound of growling. Commodus turned his head to find jackals and wolves advancing towards him, growling menacingly with every step they took, their yellow eyes fairly conspicuous against the darkness.
The hairs on the back of Commodus's neck began to stand up straight, his limbs began to shiver, and his voice fell to a mere whimper. "No…p-p-p-p-please, no…" He backed into a corner as they continued to growl. One of the wolves licked their lips, and its predatorial gaze met the prince's wide, horrified eyes.
Commodus grabbed one of the bones to use as a makeshift weapon, only for the jackals to knock it away with its paw.
"Someone, help!" Commodus shrieked, his eyes welling with tears. "PLEASE! ANYBODY! HELP ME! HELP ME!!!" Tears streamed down his cheeks.
A howl pierced through the night, and it was followed by a laugh…Lucilla's?!
Commodus caught a glimpse from the corner of his eye, and found them all standing there like spectators in the Colosseum - his father, Lucilla, his brothers, his mother…even that stupid Spaniard Lucilla and his father fawned over, all of them smirking at him with glee.
"You were never strong enough, Commodus." Commodus's father declared with an emotionless expression.
Just then, a jackal caught the fabric of Commodus's toga between his teeth and ripped the garment with a swift motion. Lucilla laughed again, louder and merrier. Then, the rest of the pack joined in the carnage, ripping and tearing into his clothing and flesh. And all the prince could do was scream and cry, begging for mercy until….
everything disappeared in an instant.
Commodus blinked his eyes again. This time, he awoke in a modest yet comfortable, cream-colored bed, covered in bedsheets softer than feathers. There were no spectators, there were no wolves or jackals, there was only…you.
"You're awake!" You entered the chamber, which was dimly lit by a few candles, wearing a white stola.
The prince sat up in bed, now realizing that he was wearing nothing but a loincloth. "Where am I? The wolves, the jackals,…Lucilla?"
"No," you replied. "They are not here now."
Commodus's eyes followed you as you poured a glass of water and brought it to his bedside. So beautiful…and so kind to him, a complete stranger. Surely you must be a goddess, for no human would take such compassion upon someone they have not known. He took a sip from the glass, letting the cool liquid calm him.
"You have nothing to fear, Commodus," you gently continued, "No one will harm us now. You are safe with me." You took his free hand in yours and brought his knuckles to your lips.
Commodus blinked yet again, this time out of surprise that you knew his name and were so bold as to touch him. It was not until that kiss that he realized how much he needed your touch. He shuddered with delight for a moment as your gentle, soft fingers brushed against the back of his hand. And your smile…so simple and pure, nothing like the fake smiles the Senate gave when he came to the Forum with his father, or when he excitedly told Lucilla his dreams about being the greatest Emperor.
"Tell me who you are," Commodus begged, silently admiring each and every aspect of your beauty. But before you answered, there was a knock at the door.
"I must go."
"No, wait…"
His toga drenched with sweat and his limbs aching, Commodus sat up in bed, rudely awakened by the sound of a guard knocking at his door who announced breakfast.
Commodus begrudgingly opened the door and let his servants help him get dressed for the day. Yet in the corner of his eye, while a servant put a golden arm cuff on Commodus's wrist, he saw you - it couldn't have been anyone else - pouring a glass of water and coyly offering him a smile, just as you did in the dream.
The rest of the day was nothing short of painful. When Commodus broke his fast with his father and sister, all they were talking about were new developments in the wars with Germania. And of course they talked more about a Spaniard named Maximus who would be joining the palace. For what reason, Commodus didn't know.
Then, Commodus intervened the conversation and asked his father if, when he left for Germania again, if Commodus could lead his own legion into battle. All he received was yet another version of the same admonishment - that Commodus was too young and not mature enough for battle. It was awful, to say the least; how was he, Commodus, the only living son of Emperor Marcus Aurelius, supposed to become a great emperor without being acquainted with the armies?! How long would he treat Commodus like a little boy, even as Commodus was nearing the age of nineteen?
The prince took his frustrations out in his weaponry classes, defeating every one of his opponents to the ground after rounds of vigorous fighting, only to be admonished again by his tutor, who reprimanded Commodus for his anger. According to the tutor, anger was a warrior's greatest enemy, for it clouded a warrior's judgement and led to rash mistakes.
Exhausted - both mentally and physically - Commodus found himself collapsing into bed again, after his nightly routine of drops of perfume and a faceful of cream.
That night, the wolves and the jackals attacked him again, and Lucilla and his father laughed again, and - much to the prince's surprise - you were there to comfort him again. But this time, before you could leave to answer the knock, Commodus caught your wrist and stared into your eyes.
"Tell me who you are," he repeated, slightly more demanding. "You do have a name?"
You replied with a soft kiss to his cheek. "We'll meet soon, Commodus." Another knock, and you were gone.
Commodus woke up, disgruntled, and barked at the guards this time when they announced breakfast.
This went on for at least two more weeks. Every night, Commodus would endure the same nightmare of being attacked while others mocked him only to find himself in your chamber, being comforted by you in the same way a faithful lover comforts their dearest beloved. And every night, you left before he could learn your name, leaving him with nothing but memories and images of you.
Commodus cursed Venus aloud every morning when he woke from this dream, demanding to know why She would bring you, so lovely and divine, and never reveal your name. Why would Venus be so cruel to make you invade his dreams and his thoughts, and yet keep you away from being in his arms?
He couldn't stop keep you away from his mind, even while he was dining with his family or practicing with his sword and shield. He wanted, no, needed to know who you were, whether you were a goddess or a human, whether you were living in the empire, whether you were married or engaged to someone else.
"Commodus, you cannot go on like this." Lucilla chastised him one day when he was caught at breakfast mulling over his dreams about you. "You need to see Galen, it has been a while." Lucilla sighed and snapped her fingers, bringing her brother away from his thoughts.
Commodus relented, agreeing to see the physician based on Lucilla's claim that Commodus was not of sound health. Galen had never been able to help Commodus completely stop seeing nightmares, though he was capable of producing a tonic or two that would make Commodus sleep like a corpse for twelve hours straight.
When Commodus approached Galen and the physician asked for his reason for coming, the prince immediately narrated each and every nightmare of his. He expounded upon your appearance in all of those dreams, how you comforted him with your soft touch, how you enchanted him with your loveliness.
The physician was visibly taken aback, not expecting to hear what in his mind seemed irrelevant for a diagnosis.
"I suppose I can give you the tonic we've used before…" Galen hesitantly began to look around his apothecary for ingredients.
Commodus shook his head. "Tell me about dreams, Galen. What do they mean?"
"Imperator, dreams can be either a message from the gods, or a symbol of something that is to come in the future. Perhaps both."
The prince nodded slowly. "Then I must find her, Galen. I must find the one who has come to me in my dreams, for surely she is meant to be mine. That is why the gods have shown her to me. I need to find her, and claim her as mine."
"Don't you see it? You will love me, as I love you. And you will stay by my side, to be mine forever."
trigger warning: mentions of stalking, smut, violent thoughts
• Commodus would be a possessive, jealous, and protective type of yandere
• He knew that you were the one for him when he couldn't sleep the night after your first meeting
• Perhaps you were a close friend of his sister Lucilla, perhaps the daughter or niece of a senator, or even a citizen who happened to catch his eye at the Games
• Either way, your face was etched into Commodus's mind as if an imaginary sculptor had engraved it with a chisel. Every detail was engraved - the color and texture of your hair, the way your eyes moved when his gaze turned to you, the way your body trembled in his presence.
• Mental images of you smiling, laying in his bed like an ethereal goddess, haunted him until the late hours of sunrise. You were dressed in white, making you look innocent and pure - the beauty to the monster awakening inside the Emperor of Rome.
• His obsession with you quickly consumed him like wildfire in a forest of dry trees. Every waking thought began to center around you: where you might be at the moment, whom you would be living with, whether you had another paramour (not that it mattered), and - more importantly - what you thought of him. Did you love him too? Did you fear him?
• He needed to see you again. More than that, he needed you to fall in love with him in the same way he believed himself to be in love with you
• Before making his presence known, Commodus intently watched you from afar (he'd make time in his busy schedule as Caesar) and tries to remember every little thing he can about you.
• Perhaps you might even acknowledge him first, before he can call your name, and this would delight him all the more. It was a sign his beloved immediately knew to whom she belonged to
• In the midst of becoming obsessed with your numerous charms, Commodus would lavish you with luxurious gifts of all kinds - imported delicacies, fine silks, expensive jewels, anything to win your affections.
• Commodus easily convinced your family to arrange your marriage to him. After all, why would anyone turn down a proposal from the Emperor of Rome, the most powerful man in the world? Unless, of course, they needed a different form of coercion. For your sake, Commodus would never hurt your family but he would threaten them, if necessary
• After you are married to Commodus, he would take even more offense at anyone who tries to get close to you. If he caught them going too far with you, there is nothing that would stop him from ordering their executions.
• He would also be very indulgent in bed, worshipping your body with hungry, passionate kisses and feral bites. Every time you were together, he'd hold you close and growl how you belong to him, and no one else.
• You are the only one who can calm him during his fits of rage, paranoia, and/or jealousy
• Commodus would never let you leave his sight, even for a few moments. He might be wary of the servants' intentions, so he would personally watch over your every movement. If you wished to take a stroll in the city, he'd take your arm and accompany you.
Summary: A sixteen-year-old Commodus agrees to sneak out of the palace with his friends Cleander and Saoterus for the first time to join the celebrations of Saturnalia in disguise.
"Absolutely not."
Commodus grimaced at the pale yellow stola before him. His good friend and chamberlain Cleander made a face as he adjusted his own veil. The two of them, along with their other friend Saoterus stood in the young emperor's chambers and were readying themselves join the celebrations in the streets of Rome.
"Come now, imperator, when are you going to let go of that stick up your arse?" Cleander used the term 'imperator' as if it were a joke rather than a title. "Io Saturnalia!"
"My father will be furious if he comes to know of this." Commodus pursed his lips only for Saoterus to paint them with a coat of rouge.
"Then we'll just tell him that Lucia Commodus was out at the festival, and you were in your chambers, studying like a good boy," Saoterus moved the brush intricately with a twinkle in his eye.
"Lucia Commodus?" Commodus scoffed, "If you're going to give me an alias, could it be a bit more original perhaps? Say…Hercules?" The other two men groaned lightly and continued to adorn themselves with kohl and other cosmetics. For a long time in Rome, it was tradition for the roles to be reversed during Saturnalia; the men could dress as women and vice versa. And Cleander and Saoterus were hell bent on taking advantage of this opportunity to enjoy themselves - they even had a few ornaments custom-made for the occasion! The only problem was getting their wealthy, handsome, and usually-goofy friend to sneak away from his overbearing family for a little while.
"I'll tell you what, Commodus." Saoterus clapped the seventeen-year-old imperator on the back while Cleander wiped off his own rouge. Disappointed with the hue, the chamberlain insisted on mixing three different shades to find the perfect one that suited him. "You can be Herculia, the female version of Hercules. We'll get you something else to wear, not pale yellow, and a lion's skin to…complete the whole thing." Saoterus thrust a dark red stola into Commodus's hands.
"Fine. Just don't put too much on my face…otherwise Cleander will have no more rouge to try on." Commodus snickered, and was promptly met with cheers from his two friends.
And so, wearing a dark red stola with golden embroidery, 'Herculia' snuck out of the palace with kohl-lined eyes and an innocent pout that easily fooled the guards. Then again, most of the guards were far too interested in the festivities themselves to carry out their duties with their usual level of vigilance.
Commodus couldn't quite believe it - his first outing from the palace without Praetorians carrying weapons, and without his parents whispering instructions into his ear. His stomach fluttered and the hairs upon his arms stood straight. Saoterus even had to remind Commodus to stop being so self-conscious about his lionskin; no one was going to even recognize them.
The three of them passed by a group of raucous gamblers near one of the banks, a sight the mensarii would've proudly frowned upon…if one of them wasn't involved in the game themselves. A gambler rolled a few bones as makeshift dice. Commodus wasn't sure what the result of that was, but it couldn't have been good. The gambler seized a bag of jewels while the rest of the players threw their hands up and groaned. One of the "losers" even bashed a bottle of wine against the stone wall of the bank. Commodus scrunched his nose and shuddered at the maroon stain left by the contents of the bottle.
Almost as if on cue, Cleander hustled Commodus towards the middle of the street, away from a feud that was about to get worse. "That's too much for your tender eyes. Saoterus, go find some wine for us. But remember to stay away from whatever Horatius is dealing. It'll be too strong for Hercules."
"Nothing is too strong for Hercules!" Commodus scoffed, throwing his chest out, "I've drank more types of wine than you have." Neither Cleander nor Saoterus looked convinced. A few moments later, the latter returned with three cups of sweet, honeyed wine supposedly infused with pomegranates. With another cry of "Io Saturnalia", Commodus, Cleander, and Saoterus downed the contents of their cups within seconds.
"If my wife should die, come to me. We shall marry, nay?"
"In your dreams, idiot." You threw your drink in the face of a drunken Senator who had just tried to hit on you. That concoction pretending to be wine was never that good anyway.
You huffed and began to walk away as quickly as you could, hopefully before the Senator could insult you. Just then, your eyes widened at the sight of a strange man singing in the middle of a forum. He seemed to have oily black hair, wore green clothing, and…mainly crooned in a foreign tongue, yet everyone was mumbling along. The only words you could recognize were, "When she sings, she sings 'come home'. When she sings, she sings 'come home'. "
"Is that the Saturnalicius princeps**?" Cleander slurred, his arm around Commodus.
"Apparently."
"You know him?"
"I…don't think so."
"Well, know that we're talking, I think I ought to know your name." The chamberlain cheekily retorted. "I'm Cleander, that's my friend Saoterus, and this is - "
"Hercules," you surmised with a smirk. "Splendid costume."
"It's Herculia," Commodus softly corrected, fighting the color in his cheeks.
Cleander and Saoterus gladly invited you to walk along with them, entertaining you with small talk and silly stunts like Saoterus's attempt to juggle fruits.
Commodus, for his part, was too busy awing at the colorful celebrations and the intensity to which people were dancing, drinking, singing, lovemaking in public. This was truly was life was supposed to be like - uninhibited, natural, fun. It wasn't supposed to be stoic, uptight, and book-bound. Why couldn't life always be like a celebration of Saturnalia? Perhaps it could - once he became the sole emperor of Rome, he could do anything he wanted. What use was having power if it could not be enjoyed to the fullest?
Meanwhile, Cleander and Saoterus had noticed their friend's mind wandering away from the present. Saoterus had an idea, and quickly whispered something into your ear. He dared you to kiss Herculia.
Perhaps it was the wine you'd had earlier, the spirit of the festivities, or simply how handsome Herculia seemed to you, but you readily accepted, even though you'd just met this trio. You walked up to Herculia, placed his hands on his cheeks, and quickly pecked him on the lips.
"Io Saturnalia, Herculia" you teased.
Commodus gulped for a moment, surprised and delighted at the same time. It was…fun. "Another?"
"Plenty of time for that later," Cleander led him forward, with you and Saoterus following them, "it's time to watch the chariot races!"
But Commodus couldn't stop turning around to glance at you - little did you know, you'd just become an Emperor's first kiss.
Hmm, alright...Since I am so excited about the book getting here soon. Can I have an imagine with Commodus, please ?
I was thinking the activities or the gifts given sounds like good fun!
Here you go dear! it's quite short but I hope you will enjoy it^^
♟: What kinds of activities do you like to do together?
I always imagined horse riding, Commodus loves it, it makes him feel free, he is independent, able to do what he wants and even in the palace when the praetorians want to escort him, he refuses, he is an excellent fighter and he's not alone, he has you and doesn't need anything else. Something I love with Commodus is cuddling with him while he read papers for work, it soothes him, his hands distractingly caressing your arm, you are nuzzled against his chest, lulled by his calm heartbeat. I personnally love doing it with him, he knows it soothes my anxiety and usually I fall asleep feeling completely safe in his arms.
🥀: What kinds of gifts has your F/O given you? What kinds of gifts have you given them?
You know how passionate Commodus is, he would do anything for his lovers. He has given me so many gifts and yet only have marked me because they were truly unique. The others were mostly a reflection of his need to show how much he loves me (and it's adorable). He has given a matching tunic and palla matching his favorite colors, meaning the tunic being white and ornated with gold threads and the palla being violet. I love to wear it when we go watch the games together. Other than that he gave me some more extravagants and yet very romantic gifts, he had a marble statue made of me, telling me he wanted the world to know the goddess he loved for eternity.
My gifts more modests but just as meaningful. I love writing poems for him, and then I watch him read it, enjoying the joy forming on his face. Sometimes, I would tell them to him, it always made him blush, it was so sweet for the feared Emperor.
