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One million pounds to the writer of this caption in the Guardian please
One of these has the moral standing of a cartoon villain, the other might save the country.
Welcome to British politics.
Is Tumblr aware of Count Binface, current hope for our nation?
Let me explain:
Grotesque fascist grifter, Nigel Farage, is the leader of Reform, the racist far right party he created because UKIP got what it wanted (Brexit) and it sucked.
Having tried and failed to be an MP many times (but somehow getting more screentime than any Liberal Democrat or Green politician), he finally succeeded in the last election because people were so overwhelmingly pissed off with the Conservatives, and many right-wing people saw Reform as the new Conservative Party; partly because it's full of rejects from the Conservative Party.
Speculation: he doesn't really want to be an MP, he wants to be a fascist grifter. He's annoyed by suggestions he do things like Be In His Constituency and Serve His Constituents.
He's recently been caught having accepted a VERY large amount of money from some unsavory people that he insists was a totally legitimate 'donation' and not breaking any rules.
Only it did break the rules and it's very clear that it did and things are in motion to hold him to account.
To avoid this, he has resigned as an MP, saying this is a protest at his treatment by the 'establisment' (he is a rich fascist grifter, but he likes to cosplay as a Man of the People). This has triggered a by-election, in which he is standing, with the hope that the people of his constituency will either elect him in a resounding win, indicating they don't care that he's corrupt (having not heard everything the investigation is uncovering), or someone from Labour or the Conservatives will win and he can swan off to America, free to grift again because of what the 'establishment' did to him.
Only, all the major political parties have agreed not to stand, stating openly that this is an obvious stunt and they won't legitimise it. So if he doesn't win, he can't say it was because he was too much of a rebel and the Establishment went against him, he'll just be a loser, which doesn't play too well with the right-wingers he wants to grift. And if he does get back in the investigation will go forward without any kind of 'mandate' from his constituency buoying him up.
But. There is another option.
COUNT BINFACE IS RUNNING.
Count Binface is part of the grand British tradition of joke candidates who stand as a protest option. They usually don't get enough votes to get their deposit back (which is supposed to deter unserious people) but they don't care, because DEMOCRACY.
Of course, Count Binface has never won, but it is hilarious to see a completely serious pathetic fascist concede defeat while standing next to a man with a bin on his head to whom they are democratically equal.
But if nobody else is standing. And if enough people in Clacton-on-Sea are finally cheesed off enough with Farage not doing anything for them, there is just a chance that one of the funniest things to ever happen in politics will happen.
Imagine. Imagine for just a moment that the Grotesque Fascist not only loses, but loses to Count Binface.
3rd place in a 1v1 🥀
Far be it of me to comment on the politics of another nation, but the Binface thing is so fucking funny. I just saw an attempted smear article against Binface in the Telegraph. It was basically just like THIS JOKE IS NOT FUNNY IT IS STUPID ALSO A DIFFERENT GOOFY POLITICIAN WHO DID A SIMILAR BIT KILLED THEMSELVES (stay classy Telegraph) AND ALSO DID YOU KNOW BINFACE IS LIBERAL!?!?!?!?!?
I'm reminded of a time in high school during student body elections, when some of my friends began posting signs around the school to encourage students to write in a vote for the pokemon blastoise. And no one really took it seriously until the school did a psa over the morning intercom not to vote for blastoise and to take the election seriously.
After that everyone in the school, now realizing they had the ability to actually mildly disrupt the proceedings of those in power, agressively and obsessively began campaigning for blastoise. 'A vote for blastoise is a vote for blastoise. Vote Blastoise.' Became the most common thing to hear in the hallway. Some people even made tshirts with a tshirt press. Eventually a human was elected but only because the school didnt count the blastoise votes. Real voter fraud happening here. I bet the boring human class president only got like 3 votes in total but I'll never know how much my hero Blastoise was cheated.
Anyway a vote for Binface is a vote for Binface. Vote binface.
Count Binface oozes more confidence and charisma in this 52 second clip than Farage ever has in his entire life and I'm actually going to be genuinely upset if he doesn't win.
Vote Binface
I love Count Binface for many reasons, but this perfect parody of dodgy election leaflet bar charts is pretty high up the list.