#cpaby2018

[queenbzzz]

End of the journey

Yes. Tapos na. Isang araw nalang lalabas na yung results.

The past months, you know everytime I close my eyes to pray I always tell Him "Your will be done, I will accept anything" but parang di ko kayang panindigan. I can't fail.

I grew up showing them I am an achiever. I didn't know I'll end up a failure. I don't know the results yet but hayy kinakabahan ako ng sobra. Ayoko isipin but kinakabahan ako. What will I do if I failed? I don't know if I can't take it. Tho I wouldn't end my life. But it will leave a big scar in my life for sure.

I hope after a long recovery I'll accept whatever the outcome will be. Hayy

[queenbzzz]

Start of a new beginning

Here it goes.

05/24/2018

4 days from now and I will start my review for my CPALE. Obviously, kinakabahan ako. As in real na kaba this time. Pinaka kabang kaba na time ko to unlike sa kaba na naramdaman ko dati tuwing finals.

I know kulang ako sa effort this summer. Wala akong nagawa or whatsoever na makakapagcontribute sa review ko. Puro gala kasi ayun nga. Live life to the fullest. Whatever. Haha. So syempre cramming to the max nanaman.

Anyway, I don't know how to be ready. I am so not ready to enter the world wherein I will be judge in so many ways.

Dumadating ako sa point na iniisip ko anong mangyayari if maging CPA na ko and anong mangyayari if hindi ako pumasa.

Mahirap idisappoint yung parents ko. I know kahit di nila ipakita, disappointed sila m grumaduate akong walang award. And it hurts. It hurts na kahit anong effort mo if you grew up an achiever lagi silang may expectations at yun yung mahirap sa part ko.

In this stage of my life, I swear I will do my best. I need to be good this time. Not just good but super duper magaling para maging CPA.

Dati sinasabi ko, "baka ayoko talaga maging CPA" or "baka napipilitan lang ako. Gusto ko ba talaga to". Pero ngayon, I've made my decision. GUSTO KO MAGING CPA!!!

And I will do my very very best. I will exert all my effort. I will sacrifice everything just to be a CPA. I know this will pay off in the end.

Guide me and bless me please Lord.

MAGIGING CPA AKOOOOOO!!!

Joanna Marie B Martinez

CPA by 2018

[queenbzzz]

Joanna Marie B Martinez-Bachelor of Science in Accountancy

April 14, 2018

I am officially a graduate of San Sebastian College-Recoletos Canlubang with a degree in Accountancy.

I must say that 5 years of continuous studying is so damn hard. Specially with my course it is really hard. I had those sleepless nights and stressful days with my books. I experienced having cups of coffee that almost acted as my blood because it's the only liquid that I am taking all night. But that's not the hardest part. The hardest part is that even you have those sleepless and stressful days and nights you still fail. I reached the point in my life wherein I don't have any choice but to just cry. I cried in front of my mommy which is the rarest thing I did. I cried because I'm so afraid to be a disappointment in the family.

I am disappointed with myself, although I graduated there still something missing. During my sister's grad. I holding my tears. I literally wanted to cry. Seeing how proud they are to my sister because of her awards I really feel so disappointed with myself. I should have done better.

A month from now, I'll be entering review school. Idk what to feel. Mixed emotions. I have to be a CPA. I have no choice but to be a CPA. This time I will do better. I will be better. No more distractions.