#crixcyy

[crixcyy]

Awaiting TXT’s Comeback

So, I wanted to talk about TXT’s new comeback. It’s so exciting. I have to say the days leading up to their comeback are always so pleasant for me because their music and album are promoted so well. I still remember their debut teasers and I knew I would love them and their music. And the same thing is happening now. I just love what BigHit is doing with the concept trailer and I especially love the teasers they put out with each member and a snippet of their title song. 

I love how they show the song’s development with each new teaser. And I just know I’ll love ‘Can’t You See Me?’ which is their title song. I must say I always love their title songs and especially the teasers. Goodness knows how many times I watched and listened to the teaser for Run Away and Crown. I think they really polish their title songs well, they sound very pop and are pleasant to the ears, oh I’m so in love. 

And hearing the teasers so far, I really want to hear the title song. It was stuck in my head and I kept trying to go listen to it but then realised it hasn’t been released; I’m deceiving myself because it sounds so good. Until May 18, I’ll be listening to the teasers in anticipation of the full version of the title song. I just know I will love it. And I’ll love them even more.

[crixcyy]

Thoughts during lockdown

This is just something I thought about one day while practicing social distancing at home. For me, I usually randomly think this way and write my thoughts down and I liked this one when I wrote it so I’m posting it here:

Because I’ve been thinking about Emily Dickinson recently after watching some episodes from the show ‘Dickinson’, I felt a strong urge to go read and look over some of her poems which I have encountered before. I remember being struck by all the dashes and also the content. I couldn’t forget one of her poems because it was about death and there was a ‘bee’ in one of them that I read and it stuck me as a strange combination. So this evening I pulled out my Norton anthology to look over them and some of the poems that appear in the show were there. I’ve been ruminating over one of them this evening. The first two lines go:

Because I could not stop for death - 

He kindly stopped for me - 

And these two lines were stuck in my head for a while this evening. Especially the part about death; the word ‘kindly’ seems unfitting here as a description of death’s role. To me ‘kindly’ portrays death as having this ‘warmth’ that I just cannot reconcile with death. 

Of course, death can be kind in certain situations and in all we need death to end this pleasant existence of ours which would become dreadful without death, so in that sense of course death can be kind. 

But the idea that death itself is intentionally kind is difficult for me to come to terms with and this intrigues me because of course I don’t know much about death and until then I can only make assumptions as to what death can be and its intentions. 

For me, it seems that death could not ‘kindly’ stop for one because it’s death’s duty to stop anyway and that’s the fact of the matter. So, death will stop for one regardless which nullifies the ‘kindly’ in that line because it was going to stop anyway. What has ‘kindly’ got to do with it? This is just something I’ve had a jolly time thinking about this evening and even now I am amused by it. That death in Dickinson’s poem of course has a personality and is romanticised is of course clear but I find it interesting that I refuse to let it get lost on me that ‘kindly’ could be attached to death. Anyway, that’s the food for thought I had this evening. I suppose Dickinson wanted one to have fun with it; I see the appeal.

[crixcyy]

Currently watching: ‘Itaewon Class’

I recently binge watched the available episodes of ‘Itaewon Class’ on Netflix because I got hooked. Although I had an idea of how good it would be, I was struck because it turned out to be much better than I could imagine. Here are some thoughts I had while watching as I wait for the last two episodes to air next week:

Park Seo Jun, is definitely the right person to play the main character, I believe only he could pull off Park Sae Roy so well and in such an agreeable way. The casting on that part is impeccable and the rest of the cast too actually are very charming and they definitely draw you in because they play their parts well.

I am a huge fan of words and this drama has great dialogue so I was really soaking up all that was happening, from the emotions to the atmosphere, the dialogue between the characters is attractive and I am applauding the writers and I guess the original webtoon. When most of the fight in a drama is in words, you can really appreciate the character’s internal makeup; what makes them tick? what moves them? there’s much to be grasped from their words to each other. And that’s what made me decided to watch this drama, the trailer encapsulated the kinds of characters Yi Seo and Soo Ah would be from each of their lines.

One fun thing I thought was how in the beginning Park Sae Roy was this lone wolf character whose potential you could see and feel. And his values are so strong he manages to gather his own pack in which he is the alpha. It’s interesting to see how he moves and works through situations through this ‘pack’ and alpha wolf lens.

And I absolutely love the two female leads, they are both well fleshed out and they are quite different. It’s lovely to see how these two women are incredibly competent and confident in what they do and yet have opposing views which does not diminish their value in any way; they are focused. 

And finally, my favourite thing about this drama is how you can appreciate all the characters. Even the villainous ones, they play their parts so well and believe in their principles so strongly that if you follow their train of thoughts it’s easy to get lost and end up on their side. Only CEO Jang, with his strong authoritative views and the best food business could be a competent match for Saeroyi. And while it’s easy to dislike CEO Jang, I think it’s also easy to acknowledge and appreciate his love for his business and his background. Of course these do not justify the horrible things he’s done but it definitely makes an interesting watch where you anticipate what each character will do because they are so well versed in their beliefs you almost crave their reaction. Because of that, I have had the best time watching and I can’t wait for the last two episodes. It will be sad to have no more episodes but I will move on with my heart filled.

[crixcyy]

BTS Concept Photos - Map Of The Soul: 7

The concept photos for their upcoming album have all been released finally this week and it just means the album release is around the corner.

All the photos have definitely left me with strong impressions and I am now highly anticipating the album.

Version 1:

If I’m being honest, this version made me feel uncomfortable and that’s mainly because of the huge hole in the floor. Also, their legs hanging in that hole made it worse. But after some reflection, I realise that the image is probably supposed to evoke discomfort in the audience. As their pre-released songs such as ‘Black Swan’ and ‘Shadow’ have made clear, not all is rosy and sparkly in the lifestyle of overwhelming success, despite its shine. So, I think that’s what the version 1 photos capture. 

The members in white have this celestial essence about them with the feathers that surround them but this is offset by the gaping black hole. And of course, BTS captures your attention but so does the hole and they are around and halfway in it which is quite troubling. I think the message is, no matter how bright you shine, you cannot escape the shadows. And that’s their reality which is difficult to deal with and also almost impossible to deal with. I mean, note my discomfort with these images as an outsider and what they have to deal with, I imagine is worse. And the hole leaves the impression that it will increase in size with time and it threatens to swallow the members. But it’s reassuring nonetheless that they are not engulfed by it and some of the members are standing while the ones sitting down appear to be unbothered. As troubling as these photos seem, there is some hope in the idea that the members are familiar with the hole; they are aware it’s there and may have even confronted it. These photos might be my favourite now in spite of my first impression. They contain a truth to them that is inconvenient to admit. That they’ve made me acknowledge this, is why I love them all the more.

[crixcyy]

[MyLoves] Song Review Corner

‘Can’t We Just Leave The Monster Alive?’ [track 5]

It’s been a while since I posted a song review from TXT’s ‘The Dream Chapter: Magic’ album so I’m posting another one to continue the series.

This song usually comes to the back of my mind whenever I though about posting another review for a song on this album. And I think that has a lot to do with how the song itself sounds to me; there’s this lovely melody that stays in the back of your mind. It’s not suffocating or intrusive, just a mellow sound filling me up with warmth, it’s very touching.

I tend to categorise songs based on how they make me feel and this song goes in the ‘evokes soft and tender feelings’ category because I can’t think of it without my heart softening at the thought of it. Right from the start, the slow, elongated, lulling croon that opens the song is very comforting. I find it difficult not to be touched by that opening. And I think it gives the idea that this song is meant to be consoling. The lyrics do exactly that throughout by repeating ‘It will be alright, alright, alright, alright’ in the chorus along with that same soothing melody you hear in the beginning. Check out the English translation of the lyrics here: 

https://txtonnews.wordpress.com/2019/10/22/cant-we-just-keep-the-monster-alive/

Hence, the song is reinforcing what it set out to do in the first place; offer warmth and solace by being consistent in reassuring you that ‘it will be alright.’ And throughout, I am convinced that ‘it will be alright’. And this track itself is about reassuring yourself and your friends that all will be fine especially for young adults, growing up can be a stressful time so reassurance is needed.

The members’ voices also help support this message to trust that everything will be okay. They too sing in a soft register that blends well with the tone of the song and they deliver the emotions well. They are communicating the song’s message and as the title suggests, even the ‘monster’ deserves to be alright hence maybe we can avoid killing it. Although the literal monster they are referring to is the one you find in a game, you can apply it to real life struggles. It’s reassuring us that it’s okay to be kinder, to forgive easily because after all, it’s alright.

When this song comes on I am always comforted, it’s doing something that’s moving and it works. It’s magic!

[crixcyy]

Movie Review: Moonlight (2016) (side note post)

This post is totally unrelated to my previous post about reviewing songs but I recently watched the movie ‘Moonlight’ and felt like posting my thoughts and feelings about it. And of course my Love for it.

I was surprised by how much I enjoyed and Loved Moonlight because I remember seeing the trailer ages ago and not being sure what it was about and forgetting about it. Luckily I watched it and loved it.

Key Points: (moments I was struck by)

Spoiler Alert!

I loved the content - gay black boy/man coming to terms with his identity in a world where gay and being black does not correspond well with masculinity especially black masculinity. Of course, it was heart-wrenching to watch how Chiron is constantly bullied about it. What struck me the most about this is how Chiron is introduced in the movie as gay which we the viewers and Chiron are stuck with throughout the movie because of course we watch as he grows into this man who is trying to deal with this label. And it was interesting to see how just about everyone around Chiron was aware of his sexual identity possibly before he even realised it. It made me think that any sign of difference a black man shows is probably noticed by everyone else because to me, Chiron seemed no different than any other boys so it was striking to see how he was targeted  for this intangible difference by others.

Arguably, one of the most satisfying scenes for me in the movie is when Chiron hits his main bully with a chair. Especially as this comes after the scene where he is beaten up. Of course, that satisfaction only lasted a few seconds when I realised the bully was not moving on the floor. Violence is definitely not the answer regardless of how much he possibly deserved to be hit by Chiron. And I was also struck (pun not intended) by how much anger and frustration Chiron must have felt to resort to violence which also shapes how he grows up into this macho black man protected by his armour of masculinity all traces of young, gentle Chiron gone.

I found Chiron’s relationship with his mother moving. Now, to be honest, it was difficult to like his mother because she was just not a great parental figure for Chiron. It makes you wonder if Chiron had not met Juan and Teresa, how he would have turned out or coped with his mother’s drug addiction and mistreatment of him. What I found the most interesting about their relationship was how much it was surrounded with the word ‘hate’. It was shocking to hear Chiron express his ‘hate’ for his mother even at a young age. He seemed certain of it. And later on, his mother also mirrors this to him. It was strange to see how most of their relationship was encased in this ‘hate’ for each other. Through their reconciliation later in the movie, I hope that that ‘hate’ only comes from their reluctance to trust and love each other.

 And finally, it was lovely to see how Chiron and Kevin grow. It’s nice that Chiron had a friend who did not question his sexuality but treated him as Chiron. Their long friendship, cut short of course by Kevin giving in to the bully’s request to beat Chiron is powerful. Despite not seeing each other for years they are able to pick up where they left off. It really warms up the movie and my heart too. You get to see how Kevin draws out Chiron’s gentle character that we are accustomed to from his childhood and teen years. Their reconciliation and where Chiron rests his head on Kevin at the end is a soft moment that is still present in my mind.

Another final point; I love Chiron. I didn’t realise it but through the whole movie I was constantly anxious and worried for him. And yes, I know that is expected as he is the main character. Regardless, I loved watching him. Despite the troubles in his life, he radiated with so much warmth that I was touched throughout the whole movie. The real Chiron always shone through. I could spot him anywhere.

So, to conclude, it may not be clear as there are plenty complex key points above, but these are some of the reasons why I Love ‘Moonlight’.