Okay, so 3 am happened and so did a little scene of a Crossover That Will Never Happen. Okay, so maybe it will happen if I get enough ideas for it, but for now, this is just... I am subjecting you to my stupidity.
Cross-post to Lost Technology for Lost Technology.
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power meets Trigun Stampede.
(No title, just “Entrapta entraptas the hell out of another mysterious artificial humanoid with cyborg aspects)
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His reflexes were like a cat’s (better than a cat’s, according to Catra) as he ducked and dodged, but the whirling dervish of purple hair kept pace and kept him trapped, blocking off all avenues of escape. The short scientist was giving him a barrage of questions. Her tall and clearly alien lab partner crossed his armored arms from where he stood under the shade of a rock outcropping, his ears pinned back and his face in a sour expression.
Catra and Glimmer were much more comfortable standing near the dark-haired lady reporter who was taking notes, the guy taking a long drag on a cigarette and the guy with the mustache who was sighing and drinking from a flask. The three seemed saner, although the two who were journalists had been peppering them with questions of their own for the last few days.
Right now, all eyes were on the bouncing ball of purple hair and the tall guy in a red coat who was yelping and squeaking and trying in vain to keep tendrils of prehensile hair brandishing a variety of tools from “examining” his cybernetic arm. Again. Also from grabbing his other arm and drawing his whole person too close to her.
“This looks like some advanced technology! I’ve gotta look at it! For science! You promised I’d get to see your arm at least!”
“Aaaaieeeee! Yah!”
Adora and Bow were just standing by, exchanging glances and trying to figure out a way to calm Entrapta down before she gave their new friend a heart-attack.
Funny how they’d ended up here. Adora – She-Ra of Etheria – and her friends (and an enemy? Frienmy? / ambiguous friend / a warlord who was receptive to reform and whom she was eager to help reform in the case of Hordak) had been on their mission traveling interstellar space and jumping through wormholes to distant worlds in their quest to restore magic to the universe. It seemed that they had found a world that likely had never had magic, although Adora could swear that she felt *something* coming from large, scraplike structures on the distant horizon – and the guy in the red coat.
Darla, their ship, had what Entrapta called “a little hiccup” in her fuel-crystal processing. They’d gotten caught in the gravitational pull of this world and had made an emergency stop. They were essentially out of gas and stuck here until they could locate some fuel crystals or some alternative means of propulsion.
And they’d been immediately greeted by bandits who’d wanted everything on the landed ship, the clothes on their backs, and by the looks in their eyes, licking of lips and some off-color comments, to do some pretty nasty things to them all.
And that was where the reporter, the drunk, the nicotine addict and the crazy guy with bushy hair and a prosthetic arm had come in. The last one had rushed to their aid, brandishing an enormous gun… which he did not shoot and instead seemed to prefer using as a club. (Glimmer was impressed. She also teleported everywhere and kicked bandits left and right in the shins and jaws). Adora had immediately transformed into She-Ra and found herself fighting back to back with the mysterious gunman, hitting assailants with the flat of her sword. Bow had brought out his goop-arrows and the cigarette-man had unwrapped the enormous cross-shape object he carried – a high-powered weapon, to the yelping and pleading of the gunman in red not to use it.
All in all, the fighting was brief and nobody died, but needless to say, everyone was very confused.
Even more so were people who had never encountered Etherian-magic before when Entrapta gave them all her octopus-hair. Explanations had been lengthy.
Introductions had happened all around. Vash – that was the guy in red. Roberto – he was the guy who wasn’t going to share his flask with Hordak. Nicholas Wolfwood – the guy with the huge cross-weapon. Meryl Stryfe, junior reporter for the Bernardelli News Agency. The planet? It had a few different names, most commonly “Gunsmoke” as a bitter joke. Occasionally “Hell.” Mostly “Noman’s Land.”
The Etherians had been stuck for days. The Noman’s Landers were not familiar with the fuel crystals that they were seeking.
Apparently, Horde Prime and the Galactic Horde had never been here. Hordak had confirmed that this sector of the universe was yet unknown and thus had never been ruled by the erstwhile self-proclaimed Ruler of the Seven Skies and Promised One of A Thousand Suns.
Entrapta had been asking many questions and after answering some that they had about her hair and Glimmer’s teleporting and Adora’s transformation and what Catra was and the HELL Hordak even was, the pint-sized scientist had not left Vash alone this entire time. Every time she seemed to get calm and they all had a moment’s rest, one aspect or another of him would draw her attention.
Hordak wasn’t jealous…oh, not at all!
He’d been grinding his sharp teeth a lot and pinning his ears back more than usual.
The first thing Entrapta had noticed was the man’s rather conspicuous prosthetic arm which, much like Hordak’s natural? Cyborg-clone arms? had a bone-like structural appearance. It was made out of some kind of mysterious metal or crystalline substance. As they’d all learned in the near-deadly encounter with the bandits, it had the ability to act as a handy shield to block projectiles. After that, Entrapta had developed a fascination with his reflexes.
Now, well, it seemed that when Adora stood close to him, strange glowing patterns emerged on his skin.
“No! It’s nothing!” Vash insisted. “Old tattoos I got with glowing ink? Aren’t they neat? Anyway, I think we all need to go our separate ways now!”
“Oh, you aren’t getting away!” Entrapta insisted. “I HAVE TO STUDY THIS! There is obviously something technological to this! I can feel it! What if this is FIRST ONES TECH?! I promise I won’t hurt you a bit! AND IT’S FOR SCIENCE!”
Hordak let out a deep, disturbing laugh when Entrapta mentioned “not hurting.”
Everyone knew that Date Night for the Lab Partners often consisted of surgeries. The Best Friends Squad was rather appalled at this, even though the old spacebat insisted that very few of them were merely exploratory, they generally were to his benefit (“to fix the numerous problems with my genetically defective carcass” he’d explained), and of course, everything between them was consensual.
She was careful, but occasionally screwed up. Catra rubbed the back of her neck and looked at the ground uncomfortably.
“Please, no! Really!” Vash insisted. “I really can’t stick around! Maybe Roberto and Meryl might like to help you find your fuel? I..uh….I…”
Entrapta’s eyes were bright. “Oh, just hold still!”
Adora was about to speak up. She could feel…something…coming off of Vash. It was like a pulse…something she could not explain – like an exchange of feelings. Was this her magic? Was this because of her status as a First One? She looked at Hordak, silently imploring him for an answer (since he had once been a part of a hive mind). Was something similar, albeit low-level going on?
Entrapta’s chipper voice chimed up. “Maybe you’re ALL tech! But I’ll have to take you apart to be sure!”
WHAM!
Adora suddenly felt ice cold.
Vash had fallen to the sand and was scrambling backwards, his eyes pin-points. His hand twitched, reaching for his gun, which he gripped tightly, but did not draw. It was obvious that he was ready to, however.
Entrapta brought her hair back into two limp ponytails at her sides and stood still for a moment before she tipped her mask down over her face. Vash stared at her, panting.
“It…it was just a joke,” Entrapta said forlornly. She turned away. “I’m sorry.”
Adora stared at Vash with her own eyes wide.
“Vash?” she asked gently. “Who is Tessla?”
