I wrote a drabble inspired by this post by @unidentifiedseacreature. Enjoy ❤️
The biggest, scariest, most life-changing thing Eddie’s ever carried inside his heart is finally out there.
For years, it had lived in him like a secret pulse - something shapeless and heavy, always just under the surface. He didn’t have a name for it at first, unsure exactly what it was, but knowing it was something. A warmth he didn’t want to look at too closely. And then one day, it had a name. He knew what it was, but the knowing of it scared him so bad he’d shoved it deep down and built walls around it.
But this last year has been a goddamn shit show.
Chris leaving. Saying goodbye to Buck and the 118 and packing up his life to move back to Texas - back to the life that had felt like a prison. Finally standing up to his parents. Watching Bobby almost die, then retire. Moving back to LA. Watching Buck move out. Then Athena and Hen going to space and almost dying.
And through it all, Eddie kept thinking. Kept picking through the wreckage of his life, holding things up to the light.
He’d gone back to see Father Brian a few times which had opened up a whole other can of worms that had Eddie going right back to therapy and having many late night conversations with Hen, who somehow always asked the questions he was afraid to.
Bit by bit, he stopped running from the thing. Stopped pretending it wasn’t there and actually acknowledged it.
And once he’d accepted it, it was like it started breathing on its own, like he’d given it life. Like his heart had grown a living thing that wriggled around and pressed against his ribs, begging to be free.
It became too much to contain, and Eddie didn’t want to hold it in anymore.
He’d done enough repressing and masking to last a lifetime, and he’d promised Hen, his therapist, himself, that he’d do his best to stop.
So early one morning after a long shift, as the golden light was spilling in through the kitchen window and gently caressing Buck’s face, Eddie finally opened up his heart and set it free.
He told Buck he was in love with him.
Because Buck hasn’t said anything. Hasn’t moved, hasn’t uttered a single sound to interrupt him, and Eddie’s still talking, rambling, tripping over his own heart, afraid that if he stops, he’ll shatter.
His chest tightens, breath catching where moments ago it had flowed so easily. He risks a glance at Buck — just a glance — and it’s enough to knock the air right out of him.
Not just smiling — beaming. A smile so wide it has his eyes crinkling, his cheeks turning that lovely shade of punk that matches his birthmark.
He’s the most beautiful thing Eddie’s ever seen.
“Yeah?” Buck asks, voice soft and small, like he’s afraid to believe it.
Buck swipes a hand over his face, huffing a laugh like he’s trying to keep himself together. “I love you too. God, Eddie, I love you so much it hurts.”
“It doesn’t have to hurt anymore,” Eddie whispers as he steps closer, finally allowing himself to reach out and touch. He gently cups Buck's face between his hands, thumbs stroking softly over his cheek bones. “We can have this. We can love each other loudly. Let me love you loudly, Buck”.
Buck answers by leaning in and capturing Eddie’s lips in a kiss. Soft and shaking and real. It’s so full of love and devotion, it nearly brings Eddie to his knees - but there are arms around him, holding him up, keeping him safe. Like they always have.
Buck breaks the kiss first, pressing their forehead together, their breaths mingling in the quiet.
“I’m gonna love you so loudly, you’ll get sick of me.”
He says it like a joke, but Eddie hears the tremor under it. The old fear. The “what if I’m too much?” that Buck has carried since childhood.
So Eddie kisses him again, slow and sure, and when he pulls back, he lets the promise fall against Buck’s lips like a prayer.
