This is for @nevcolleil, who said they liked misunderstandings with happy endings, so here is chapter one of a Much Ado About Nothing inspired fic! Merry Christmas and I hope you enjoy!
Seek Not to Alter Me (2695 words) by Daisyishedwig
Chapters: 1/?
Fandom: Glee (TV 2009), Hollyoaks (TV)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe
Characters: Blaine Anderson, Sebastian Smythe, Mark "Dodger" Savage, Ash Kane, Barney Harper-Mcbride, Annalise Appleton, Texas Longford
Additional Tags: Friends to Enemies to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Inspired by Much Ado About Nothing, References to Shakespeare, Discussions of Addiction, Past Klaine, Not the most Kurt friendly, but he isn't mentioned /that/ often
Summary:
Blaine Anderson needed space. And, cruel as it was to his (now ex) boyfriend, going to school on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean seemed to be the best way to get it. But it’s hard to forget about everyone from back home when Sebastian Smythe seems determined to worm his way back into Blaine’s life.
Ugh, the desire to write Hollyoaks fic when I know I don't know enough yet to properly do so is killing me.
Like, I simply need a fic where Brendan doesn't find out Simon is undercover and he continues with his plan to make Brendan love him, and oops it works and oops maybe Simon is having a hard time reminding himself he doesn't actually love Brendan and it's all angsty and conflicted Simon who keeps blowing ops on instinct to protect Brendan but can't understand why.
And I also need a fic (honestly, could be the same one) where Brendan and Simon continue having sex and Simon just disassociates every time until Brendan notices. I found one kind of like this where Simon was using sex for self harm to punish himself, but then Brendan started being softer and gentler and he started enjoying it, but I really want one where Brendan actually realizes what's going on, but also like... I want it to take a good number of times before he does. For the angst.
But like, what if instead of creating OCs for this fic I'm writing where Blaine is studying abroad in England, what if I just steal a bunch of Hollyoaks characters? Who's gonna fight me if I decide that Dodger and Texas and Ashe and Barney are all actually Seblaine's besties? Who doesnt want to see psych student Ashe Kane psychoanalysing Sebastian and Blaine and all of their tension? Or bisexual disaster Dodger Savage who definitely didn't fuck Sebastian the first night they met *wink wink*. And Barney's just there because I think we need someone genuinely wholesome around and Texas and Dodger are just a package deal in my head.
Here, have some more Seblaine angst.
tw: internalized transphobia
Sebastian’s eyes narrowed. “Don't lie to me,” the warning was low, and Blaine saw a flash of frustration behind his eyes. “There is a difference between omitting the truth and lying to my face.” There was a sharp edge to his voice.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Blaine insisted.
“Yes, you do.”
“Sebastian,” Blaine tried again.
“Don’t,” Sebastian cut him off. “You can stop hiding, Blaine. I know, okay? I know.”
Blaine’s heart was in his stomach like a stone. Sebastian was angry, practically quivering with rage. He’d expected him to be upset, furious he’d been lied to, tricked, for months. But he never would have expected this… concern. The same aggravation Blaine regularly saw in Nick’s eyes reflected in Sebastian’s tenfold. Because he knew. He felt the knots in Blaine’s back, saw the winces of pain, becoming more and more frequent the longer they were together. Could recognize the moments when Blaine succumbed to the pain, falling limp underneath him or curling up in a ball, trying to catch his breath against the constriction of his binder.
Panic attacks, he called it. Chronic muscle tension. Hereditary, nothing he could do about it, so there was nothing for Sebastian to worry about. But now he knew, Blaine had been doing this to himself, and in a twisted fucked up way, he’d been doing it for Sebastian. So he’d stay. So Blaine could keep him.
I'll tag @calsvoid, @lusthurts, @wowbright, @backslashdelta, @bitbybitwrites
@fallevs, @annepi-blog, @kurtsascot, and @leydhawk as well as an open tag to anyone else who would like to share what they're working on.
I was tagged by @cryscendo, @backslashdelta, and @sperrywink on Sunday but I didn't have anything share, but now it's Wednesday and I do.
But first, a bit of an explanation for this snippet. I tend to look at writing as a bit of an exorcism, there are words in my brain and they must get on a page or I'll go mad. This is why I tend to have so many WIPs at once, because I simply can't ignore scenes when they come into my head.
Now this fic is not a WIP I'm actively working on, it's an idea I had probably a decade ago that I might maybe one day write, but probably not for a while. But when a scene must be exorcised, it doesn't matter what my plans are, so I wrote like 1200 words for this yesterday.
It is a Starklaine D/s universe AU, if you want to hear more about it, I do have a post I made way back when that breaks down the basic concept, if you're interested. But for now, enjoy some angst!
Another harsh, cut off sob made Kurt’s heart clench and before he knew it he was knocking on the door. “Blaine,” he called, and he heard a sudden commotion as Blaine startled, scrambling to make himself presentable. “I’m coming in,” he gave the warning, knowing he should ask for permission, but Blaine still struggled with answering questions about his personal space, never knowing if they were simply asking to be polite, or if they really wanted Blaine’s opinion.
Blaine was standing in the middle of the room when Kurt entered, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. His face was tear streaked, his hair rumpled and sleep mussed. His arms were out away from his body like he wasn’t sure what to do with them, half raised in defense or placation.
Kurt gave him a soft smile and Blaine’s face twitched in some approximation of a smile that was so forced it looked downright painful. “You can sit, Blaine,” Kurt said, leaving the door open behind him, “do whatever makes you comfortable.”
Blaine’s brow furrowed and he finally wrapped his arms around himself and dropped to his knees on the floor. Kurt gasped quietly and took a step back. Of course, he’d seen Blaine on his knees a number of times before, it seemed to be his default position when he didn’t know what to do. But this left a strange feeling in his gut because it felt like… well it felt like Blaine was kneeling for him.
Blaine was watching him closely and noticed Kurt’s backward glance, like he too wanted to cut and run from this situation. He shifted backwards until his butt hit the floor and instead hugged his knees to his chest. Kurt frowned but visibly relaxed before he lowered himself to the floor, sitting crosslegged a few feet from Blaine.
Blaine fought the urge to lower himself further, conflicted about being on the same level as Kurt. When they were standing it didn’t feel so distinct, since Kurt had a few inches on him, but sitting on the floor made them the same. Blaine didn’t like it.
“I heard you crying,” Kurt started, tilting his head to catch Blaine’s eye. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, Sir,” Blaine blurted, even though he knew his tear stained cheeks showed that that was a lie.
Kurt’s gaze darkened slightly, his breath hitching in his chest. The twinge in his gut grew stronger, and Kurt tried to push it away. He’d spent too many years believing he was a dom, that had to be what it was. “You don’t have to call me Sir, Blaine,” he said and noted the flush that started high in Blaine’s cheeks, “but I would rather that you not lie to me.”
Blaine took in a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Kurt,” he said, eyes trained on his feet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kurt asked.
Blaine shrugged. “You don’t have to, I’ll be okay.”
“And if I want you to talk about it?”
Blaine let a short breath out through his nose and it was the closest thing to a scoff that Kurt thought he was capable of. “You don’t even like me,” Blaine said, “you don’t have to comfort me.”
Kurt’s jaw dropped slightly and he opened and closed his mouth a few times before he cleared his throat. “I don’t… dislike you,” Kurt started. “I have issues… with the situation. But that’s a me problem, not a you problem, okay? I’ll get used to it… eventually.”
Blaine blinked at him with dull eyes.
“Look, I’m– I can be possessive. And jealous. And I’m not wild about the fact that my boyfriend has another sub living with him, okay? It stings. Especially when you’re like, the epitome of a perfect sub and I tend to make him fight for control.”
Blaine frowned. “Elliot loves you.”
Kurt shrugged. “Not all doms like having a brat for a sub.”
“But Elliot does.”
Kurt twisted his leather bracelet around his wrist, not sure how to express to Blaine how long he’d felt broken, unsure of himself, staring at his blank wrist like he could will it to tell him who he was. How submission didn’t come instinctively to him, it was an art he’d had to learn, and Elliot had painstakingly trained him through months of Kurt feeling so lost, but knowing one thing and one thing only: he liked kneeling for Elliot. But Blaine didn’t know he was unmarked and he could count on one had the people who did.
“Hey,” Kurt scolded gently, “I came in here to comfort you, not the other way around.”
The corner of Blaine’s mouth quirked up in a wry smile.
“So stop deflecting, and tell me what’s wrong.”
Blaine’s spine straightened and Kurt noted how much that sounded like and order, but Blaine was speaking before he could correct it into a question.
“It’s stupid, really. I don’t even…” Blaine took a frustrated breath, “I don’t understand why it set me off. Why it keeps setting me off.”
“It’s not stupid. If it’s hurting you, it’s important.”
Blaine’s lower lip trembled and he looked away, his eyes wet. “Elliot’s so good with you,” he said quietly, “he’s patient and kind, even when you’re fighting. Watching you two… it hurts.”
Kurt frowned. “He’s like that with you too.”
Blaine laughed wetly. “I know. I know he is. And it’s easier to… settle into it when it’s directed at me. It feels good, and right. But when I’m watching, I just get stuck in my own head and I spiral into all these thoughts–” he cut himself off with a shuddering breath. “Elliot makes it looks so easy with you. To be patient, to be kind, to care. So what about me made it so hard for him to be kind?”
I know it's late, but I'll tag @kurtsascot, @fallevs, @bitbybitwrites, @annepi-blog
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/?
Fandom: Glee (TV 2009)
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Characters: Blaine Anderson, Sebastian Smythe, Kurt Hummel, Santana Lopez, Elliott "Starchild" Gilbert, Sam Evans (Glee)
Additional Tags: Haunting, Angst, Ghost!Blaine, Past Klaine, Ghost Sex, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Depression
Summary:
Sebastian has been seeing ghosts since he was a child, so when he sees a specter lingering around his apartment, he doesn't think much of it. Prepares for the worst, hopes for the best, and ends up caring far more for the sad, lonely spirit living with him than he thought he was capable of.
“Have you scared off a lot of tenants?”
“Not intentionally,” the boy assured. “I think… I think I just make the place feel weird. Cold and dark, you know.”
I haven't posted one of these in so long I don't even know how many tags I've missed, but the last one I can see is from @bitbybitwrites
Have a snippet from my Trans!Blaine fic that will be posted whenever my brain stops fighting me over it.
David was sitting on Blaine’s porch when he turned down his driveway, his head leaning against the side of Blaine’s house, eyes closed. He jolted awake when Blaine stomped his way up the steps.
“Why are you here?” Blaine grumbled as he unlocked his door.
“Sebastian called.” David pushed to his feet and followed Blaine through his front door.
“Why you?” Blaine dropped his bag in the doorway, kicking of his shoes a little harder than necessary. One bounced down the hallway and the other richocheted off the wall, hitting him in the shin.
“I live closer, you’d have been home by the time Nick or Jeff got here. We needed to have eyes on you before you locked yourself away to brood.”
“So this is a welfare check then,” Blaine scoffed.
“A long overdue one, it seems. You should change, I’m confiscating your binders.”
Blaine blanched. “What?”
“Not forever, just for the week. You need a break from them and none of us can trust you to take one. It’s spring break, you can hide in your house the whole week while your body recovers from the abuse you’ve been putting it through. Though Nick and Jeff are probably going to try to convince you to go to Chicago with them.”
“And you’re doing this because Sebastian asked you to?”
“No,” David stated firmly. “Sebastian simply asked me to make sure you got home safe. But when pressed he said you’d gotten in a fight over your binders. We all knew you’d been wearing them for longer than you should, wearing them at practice even, but only he knew the extent.”
and the last set of tags today will be: @lusthurts, @calsvoid, @annepi-blog, @backslashdelta, @wowbright, and @fallevs
I was tagged by @bitbybitwrites and I'm so excited to get back into writing this year. Last year I set a crazy reading goal for myself and did almost nothing else, but this year I want to get back into my other hobbies, writing especially, so hopefully you'll see more of these!
This is from a little something I've been messing around with, it doesn't have a title yet, but it's currently labeled as "Ghost!Blaine AU" in my files.
The second time Sebastian brought a boy home they made it all the way to the bedroom before he heard a loud crash from the kitchen and had to pull himself away from the tangle of limbs to investigate. All of his cabinets were open and the contents had been dumped on the floor. Bowls, plates, cups, food, all of it. The boy was standing in the middle of it, looking shaky and breathing heavily.
“Out,” he barked, and it was the first time Sebastian had ever heard him speak. His eyes flickered with rage and when all the lights went out, Sebastian’s date, once again, ran for the hills.
Sebastian closed the door behind him and leaned against it heavily for a moment before he steeled himself and moved swiftly to his room. Rifling through the few unpacked boxes in his closet he retrieved a small but ornate box and a rosary. He stalked back to the kitchen and walked right up to the boy still standing among the wreckage, his shoes crunching on broken glass.
“Do you know what this is?” Sebastian asked, presenting the box. The boy startled back a few steps when Sebastian locked eyes with him. The lights flickered with the boy’s unsteady breathing.
“I-I–”
“It’s a sealing box, currently empty, purchased the day I signed the lease to this place.”
The boy’s eyes were wide and terrified. He backed up a few more paces but Sebastian followed until he was backed into the cabinet behind him, his back bent at an awkward angle as he tried to lean further away from Sebastian, but all that did was give Sebastian more height to tower over the cowering ghost.
“It’s a lot of work to exoricse a spirit, work I wasn’t particularly keen on doing when you seemed harmless, but now?”
“I’m-I’m sorry,” the boy said, his voice nearly a whimper.
“Do I have to use it? Or can you keep your blatant homophobia in check?”
“Im not… that’s not–”
Sebastian raised an eyebrow at him but he wouldn’t meet Sebastian’s expectant stare.
“It won’t happen again,” he said softly.
“Good,” Sebastian said sharply.
He opened the box and dropped the rosary back inside before setting it on the counter. The boy flinched but didn’t do more than straighten up when Sebastian moved away from him.
This week I'll tag @calsvoid, @lusthurts, @kurtsascot, @sperrywink, @fallevs
