‘I’m a cute psycho killer, isn’t it obvious?’ x Dan Howell
yes, this is a halloween one shot, YES I KNOW IT’S ONLY SEPTEMBER LEAVE ME ALONE. anyway, enjoy xx (side note : Y/F/N = your friend’s name)
You never were a big fan of dress up parties, especially when they were Halloween themed. All the fake blood, open gushing wounds and other way too explicit make-up just made you nauseous. And all the people who decided to be an absolute douche and dress up as a killer clown, didn’t make it any better. But, you never had a choice when it came to whether you’d go or not go to a party. Your best friend, [Y/F/N], just knocked on your door, basically threw an outfit in your face, and dragged you along. (That was one of the reasons you always made sure your phone was on full battery in the evening in the weekends.) Tonight was yet another one of those nights. [Y/F/N] had texted you, saying she would be at your apartment in ten minutes to pick you up for some Halloween party somewhere on the other side of London. And now you had to improvise some sort of Halloween attire. Something that wasn’t too obvious, since you weren’t really about going all out with costumes. So you decided on wearing simple jeans, some boots and a shirt that had an embroidered text on it, saying ‘cute but psycho’. A small bow clip in your hair and some plastic knife with red stains made your outfit complete. But when you saw [Y/F/N]’s outfit, you immediately felt quit underdressed. ‘Oh, c’mon, [Y/N],’ she sighed, rolling her eyes that looked plain white because of the contacts she was wearing. ‘Couldn’t you try a little harder?’ I raised the knife I was holding in my hands, grinning sheepishly. ‘You know I’m not that into Halloween.’ I shrugged, and then looked, a bit disturbed, at the fake blood that covered half of [Y/F/N]’s face. ‘The only thing I like about it is that I can watch ‘Nightmare before Christmas’.’ ‘I really don’t get why we are friends,’ [Y/F/N] sighed, but then smiled, which looked really upsetting because of her ripped mouth. ‘Let’s just go, maybe I can convince you to get some fake blood here and there.’ ‘Not going to happen.’ You smiled at her, taking your phone and keys, and following her outside. You had no clue how someone got away with a house party in a London suburb, but they had made it happen. Loads of people were dressed from head to toe, fake blood was seen on almost every visible body part, and there was a wide range of creepy masks. And, of course, those damn killer clowns. You suddenly wished you had brought a real knife, just to feel a bit safer around the pale faced and red painted lips demons. And the pounding music that seemed to raise your heartbeat even more, didn’t quit help with the whole situation. So, you quickly followed [Y/F/N] inside, avoiding eye contact with everyone while clinging tightly onto your plastic knife, that felt really stupid compared to the really realistic looking torture instruments. Why couldn’t people just dress up as cats and pumpkins like in the good old days? The music only got louder as you got closer to the house, and it seemed almost unbearable once you were inside. But you couldn’t tell if it was really the music, or the nauseous making smell and creepy faces staring at you. (Or that was what they did in your imagination. In reality, they were all laughing, drinking, and dancing. An odd combination with the masks and make-up.) [Y/F/N] handed you a blue cup, smiling. ‘Drink up, I know how nervous you are. And don’t worry, I’m not drinking so we’ll get home safely.’ You smiled thankfully at her and took a careful sip, glad that it was one of your favorite drinks. ‘I’m going to say hi to some people, you’ll be okay?’ You just nodded and smiled again. You’d became pretty good at being alone at parties this big. But this was better than to tag alone with [Y/F/N] and have to go through all the awkward introductions. And she knew you preferred staying behind. With a quick wave, she disappeared in the crowd of dancing costumes. You found a good spot in the kitchen, right next to the snack table, where the music wasn’t too loud. And you didn’t seem to be the only person that was searching for company in food. He was awkwardly shoving a handful of crisps into his mouth, when you made eye contact. He looked to say at least horrified that I had ‘busted’ him, and wanted to say something, but when he opened up his mouth, half of the crisps fell out his mouth again. You tried really hard to not laugh at him, but it was kinda hard not to. ‘I’m sorry,’ you said, apologizing for laughing at his awkward moment. He quickly munched away at the remaining crisps, while walking over to you. ‘That’s okay. Guess we’re in this together huh?’ He grinned, pointing at his ‘outfit’. He was wearing a black jeans, along with a black, long sleeved shirt. ‘Are you dressed as an emo kid?’ You frowned, looking at his hair that clearly once used to be a fringe. ‘I guess,’ he shrugged. ‘And you are?’ ‘A cute psycho killer, duh.’ You said, dangerously swinging your plastic knife around, while pointing at your bow in your hair. ‘Obviously,’ he chuckled. ‘Hi, I’m Dan, the emo kid. And what is your name, cute psycho killer?’ ‘[Y/N],’ you smiled. ‘What’s your excuse for not wearing a costume?’ ‘Partly didn’t get the memo it was supposed to be a dress up kinda thing. Kinda played video games until the last minute and got too lazy to put on something else. You?’ Dan smiled, rolling up his sleeves ‘till they reached his elbows, leaving some left over crumbs of the crisps on his sleeves. ‘I don’t really like Halloween.’ ‘What?!’ Dan said, gasping dramatically. ‘But the Spooky Season is the best season! I’m sorry, but we really can’t be friends.’ ‘Spooky Season?’ You laughed. ‘That sounds way cuter than Halloween really is. I mean, look at the people around you. They all look like they are murdered, or are about to murder someone. That’s not spooky anymore. That’s straight up psycho.’ ‘Says the girl dressed as a ‘cute psycho’.’ Dan grinned, pointing at my bow. ‘Damn, you got me there.’ You laughed. ‘Anyway, if you hate Halloween, why are you here?’ ‘Because my best friend basically drags me to every party. I know what you’re thinking, what a cruel friend, but otherwise she’d go alone, so I’d rather go with her so at least I’m here if she does something stupid.’ ‘That’s actually really nice of you, … For a psycho killer.’ Dan added, laughing. You just roll your eyes and take a big sip of your drink. ‘It doesn’t look like you’re having the best time either.’ You raised an eyebrow at him, and quickly glanced at the dancing crowd, to see if [Y/F/N] had returned yet. ‘Once again, kinda in the same situation.’ Dan smiled, and then looked behind him when someone shouted his name. ‘It looks like my friend is ready to go. But hey, give me your number. Maybe I could convince you that Spooky Season in fact is very fun.’ ‘I’d doubt you could do that, Dan, but I’m willing to give you a chance.’ You laughed, motioning him to give you his phone so you could add your number. ‘I’ll text you,’ Dan said, winking and snapping his fingers at you, in an obvious ironically way, making you laugh. ‘Don’t kill to many people, cute psycho.’ ‘And you don’t cry too much over My Chemical Romance. Watch out, or I will play that one note.’ ‘Nice one,’ Dan laughed, going for another grab in the crisps bowl, waving with his other hand, while walking away. And of course, he stumbled against someone, spilling all the crisps on the floor. You chuckled, while he looked back at you, hoping as if you wouldn’t have seen it. He shrugged and then quickly walked out of the house. ‘Hey! You okay?’ [Y/F/N] stood suddenly in front of you, smiling. ‘Yeah, I’m okay.’ You smiled back at her. ‘What happened?’ She asked, looking suspiciously at you. ‘Nothing special.’ But you couldn’t stop smiling for some silly reason. And when you felt your phone violently vibrating in your pocket, that smile was there to stay. Maybe ‘Spooky Season’ wasn’t that bad after all. If you’d count out the creepy clowns, bloody make-up and masks, and kept in the awkward, tall, emo guys.
