So this applies physically, mentally, emotionally, and even financially. If you don’t take care of you like the king/ queen that you should know you are, people are just not going to be as attracted to you. Sometimes we need to stop and ask ourselves “am I even being my best self, if I’m honest with myself?”. And if the answer, deep down, is no, well then... how do you expect people to feel attracted to you?
Are you physically healthy? Not to be confused with body size--I’m talking health. Health encompasses your physical wellness, your diet, your habits like do you do drugs or drink a lot, do you binge on sugar or fast food too often? Do you exercise? Do you get enough sleep and rest/ are you overworked? How is your mental health? Are you riddled with anxiety or stress? Do you care about your physical appearance? Are there any aspects of your physical appearance that you can admit, need some TLC? Do you groom and dress like a person who respects themselves? If you look lazy and sloppy, what people can expect from your treatment of them is “lazy and sloppy”. Eventually as things relax, OK it’s fine if a few shirts you have done hard work in or adventured in have some holes or whatever. But for first impressions, it is clear who cares about themselves, and who does not.
Are you emotionally healthy? Are there past hurts you need to address? How do you treat others? Are you kind, and peaceful? Are there any parts of yourself you feel insecure about? Are you in touch with your own emotions and feelings? Is there any aspect of your life that “haunts” your emotions? Do you need therapy for any past trauma? (therapy is the new sexy, BTW. A person who knows themselves and is constantly exploring who they are and who they stand to become is a fantastic person to date). Are you good at knowing how to manage your own emotional hardships in mature and healthy ways? I’m in my 30s and I am just now realizing that I actually had and have a lot of work to do around developing emotional self-reliance. And yes, I’m totally in therapy and it is one of the best supports I could possibly have b/c my therapist is SO good and I’m seeing a lot of growth.
Are you financially healthy? This absolutely matters because when you are in relationship with another person, all the aspects of your life will become exposed. You can’t hide it from your partner forever if you are not financially fit. Dating also isn’t free; and your lifestyle will determine what becomes possible for you both as a couple, and how well you can love and support another person.
