It reminded me of when I got to go to dances - or socials - in middle school. I didn’t hang out with friends too much outside of school, but I always looked forward to socials. There would be a DJ and dancing, and I got to be with my friends at night. I got excited to bring home that neon colored permission slip and looked forward to every dance, only to have it go by too fast and wishing it wouldn’t end. Each started with dancing in the shower.
Saturday morning I woke up, and my sister still hadn’t had her baby. Oh yeah, there was a chance I’d have to skip the wedding with Matt. I texted him that I was basically “on-call” ready to leave at any moment and of course he was very supportive. My sister wanted me to have this fun day with Matt, and there was no way I’d miss the birth of my niece - so we kept in close contact.
I think I saw this as a first date, no. I think I saw this as a second shot? or maybe hitting the F5 key to see if the page had refreshed and maybe he’d see me differently, maybe. Either way, I’ve only seen Matt briefly at Bumbershoot and Sunset Tavern since January, so I was excited to be in a wedding atmosphere with him.
I picked him up a quarter passed 10am. He was running behind and gave me the code to his apartment. I knocked and he opened the door wearing navy slacks, a button down, tie with clip and a gray blazer. He looked really dapper. I called a Lyft and we chatted the whole time and caught up in the car ride on our way to Newcastle Golf course as if a moment hadn’t passed.
We arrived and just as expected, I knew no one for the first half. We got some coffee and water and stood by a cocktail table and just talked - no awkward silences, just comfortable conversation. I made jokes about him being the only white man at an all Asian wedding, and he bantered back. We took our seats before the ceremony and obviously I cried. We laughed as we could hear golfers being loud and oblivious to the fact a wedding was occurring.
It was time for cocktails and passed apps where someone from high school came up to us that recognized me and we talked for a bit. Matt was a solid date, making good eye contact with others as we talked, polite, engaged. I dropped some food and he picked it up and held my garbage, he was a gentleman - I enjoyed him being there. We made our way to the bar for another drink, and then went to check out the view. Some lady asked us to take her picture, then offered it in return which I was so glad she did. I noticed the first pose: Matt had his hands behind his back, like a polite grandpa and gently leaned in. The second pose he put his arm around my shoulder which was a bit friendlier. We went in to get our name cards and sit at the table.
“Can I put you in my Instagram story?” he asked? I wish you would! I thought to myself. It was one of those nothings that made me giddy to be a part of his public social media newsfeed. But hey, when I see free happies I take ‘em. The post ceremony portion was quick with the first dance and daughter/father dance, and only one speech. I introduced Matt to folks and he could carry his own. I remembered him telling me his ex would leave him alone at a party and would berate him for not being as social. He had asked me how I would act in a situation, and true to form with what I said months ago, i was attentive. I am attentive - I feel being a good date is important and I take pride in. Likewise, Matt got us more drinks, on top of the few glasses of wine we had for lunch.
As the first part of the event came to a close, I asked Matt if he could do a quick song for me: the first few lines of Copacabana as my soon to be niece was to be named Lola. He did, I took a video, and again I swooned.
I called a Lyft and we headed to our recess activity. We had about 6 hours to kill, and he was game for hanging out as long as the “I” in him got a nap in - I being for Introvert. So we went to the Garage on Broadway - a bowling alley bar/restaurant with pool tables and shuffle board. I also knew it was close to his house so thought it would be more convenient as well. We ordered shoes and a few games and he paid, which was very kind. We played a total of 3 games - after each one he’d ask, “Another?” and I was giddy again, I had just wanted to bowl over a 100 once - I think the final game I may have gotten 103. He was better at bowling than I was - and it was fun to play in dressed up attire. We each had a few cocktails so I was feeling pretty good.
Then it was nap-time. Matt went home to take care of some things, and I went home to change into street clothes, then head to my sister’s house to pick up some things, then head to the hospital to visit her. I only had about 30 minutes to give her the low down of the first half of the day, and make sure she was doing fine.
How does it feel so far? We’ve only been on 4 dates earlier in the year, and it felt very similar to that. Matt has not been very flirty, but the conversations and ease was there, as well as comfort-ability. The new attributes were that ‘of’ a date, as in dressing up and being attentive to one another. It was really nice, and I was looking forward to the second half of the day.
