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paul & julian, julian & paul
rare sight of paul without glasses...
“He wanted to tear through Julian’s skin and map the shapes of liver and lungs, to memorize the path of every artery with his fingertips. He wanted to break Julian’s body open and move inside it alongside him, rib cages interlaced around a single heart.” These Violent Delights (Micah Nemerever)
Digital Illustration, 2025 Gorchart
I'm so not ok after reading this book! Paul Fleischer, when I catch you ricky jesus fucking chriisstttt
Was suddenly reminded of how much I really loved the book These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever. This is a cover I made for my own homemade hardback version of the book, but I kinda don't want to show it bc its...uhhh it was my first time trying to do such a thing and it's...not the best LOL. But I'm pretty proud of it regardless.
julian was lowkey lucky to have been in the 70s, cause just imagine the shit Paul would be pulling if they had modern telephones. "why didnt you answer my texts?" "why are you following these people on instagram? i bet you like them better an me" "who are you texting? are you cheating on me?"
If you're a fan of queer dark academia, thrillers, or toxic co-dependent murder-husbands, you've probably heard of Micah Nemerever's debut novel from 2017, These Violent Delights in which two teenage boys living in 1970s Pittsburg trap each other in an all-consuming, ever-escalating relationship.
Paul is insecure, sensitive, and currently grieving over the recent death of his father. More than anything, he wants to create something beautiful and leave an everlasting mark on the world to prove his life has meaning.
When he meets Julian, an effortlessly charming and magnetic classmate who takes notice of Paul's unique view on the world, Paul feels he's being truly seen for the first time in his life. He believes Julian sees his potential for brilliance and will do anything to prove himself worthy—of Julian's love, his expectations, and his expectations of himself.
When nothing ever feels good enough, Julian begins cautiously encouraging the dark glimpse he catches of a hidden side of Paul's personality—an uncontrollable, involuntary penchant for violence.
As the strain of their relationship threatens to break, they decide that the only thing to save it is to plan something irreversible together—something violent and therefore beautiful.
***
I have to say, I'm VERY proud and pleased with how this personal dream project of mine came out!! A big goal of mine is to design the visual elements for a queer academia thriller, and for someone who hasn't properly drawn people in over a year—let alone in a more realistic style like this—it couldn't have come out better!
I lost sleep agonizing over little elements like accidentally drawing Paul instead of Julian with freckles, remembering Julian's eyebrow scar, and getting Paul's glasses right (I originally gave him some very dashing and historically accurate double-bar aviator wire frames), and after a week of not being able to break my terrible habit of leaning closer to the screen instead of zooming appropriately my eyes, neck, and shoulders could all use a break, lol. But overall, I'm very happy to finally have this project in my publishing art portfolio!
I'll spend the rest of 2024 sharing my process screenshots, alternate versions, the audiobook mockup, and favorite quotes from the novel itself—or you could take a look at everything right now over on my ko-fi page!
a thing I will always cherish about my book's readership is the significant venn diagram overlap between "people who ship it" and "people who want to set Paul on fire"