Start Another Story. Short version: I have problems being in the car so I'm doing a selfie project to try to overcome the trauma. Long version: I have agoraphobia. I have always had agoraphobia, I just didn't know it because I thought it was the fear of wide open spaces (it's more complicated than that, and actually is more the fear of being trapped somewhere you can't get out of, like, say, traffic). Waiting in lines, getting stuck in traffic, being in music venues and movie theaters, these are all agoraphobia triggers for me. Lately the traffic thing has been worse than usual, thanks to another driver, uh, triggering my emetophobia (YAY, TWO PHOBIAS IN ONE!!!). I have a minor panic attack every time I'm stopped at a light. I immediately feel my stomach squeeze and I either want to rip all my skin off or jump out of the car. I guess it goes without saying that this response is not okay. I talked about it with my therapist and she said that people who have to face their trauma all the time (or 7 times on the way home from therapy, whatever) need to try to figure out how to start another story. Story: I went to therapy and back. It was raining lightly. I could see well because the storm wasn't dark. The worst thing that happened was I missed a green light twice because people ahead of me are confused about operating accelerator pedals. Each trip took about 10 minutes. I was listening to selections from Fight Like a Girl by Emilie Autumn, because "Start Another Story," duh. I seriously considered turning around and going home four times on my way there but convinced myself not to. Someone had the disabled spot again, but I parked across the street and I don't have to pay because of my disabled parking placard. I got a little wet in the rain, but I'm fine. #agoraphobia #scaredofdriving #panicattacks #anxietydisorders #realphobias #phobiasarenotfunny #phobiasarenotjokes #dealingwithtrauma #mentalhealthcare #startanotherstory
