deepdarkthought replied to your post “¦my mom thinks that i have a sound mental health… hoooooo boy, is she...”
Same here, my mum only know a very small part of my problems, but the judgmental voice/face she got when I told her that part makes me never want to tell her anything like that ever again.
I am so sorry to hear that.
But at least we can find some comfort in knowing that we’re not alone??
This, “revelation” of sorts, or whatever it is you want to call it, actually started a few years ago, when I was just in the starting process of working out exactly what my problems was. I have social anxiety and am extremely introverted, and no not deal well with crowds at all. And we were at this charity running event with her co-workers, and there was this event pit that was crowded. And it was just so loud and there was too many people, I got a sensory overload and had a minor panic attack. I managed to keep her off my back the entire evening, but as we sat on the buss back home, an oh so casual comment about how I was not comfortable with that much people around me managed to slip out. And mom wasted no time before jumping on me with that spiteful attitude and going “well I guess we need to get you medicated then”.
And that’s not what a confused 15 year old needs to hear.
Now I’m not speaking bad of medication!! I’m actually doing the opposite! Medication is great! I have actually considered having the possibility of going on meds myself investigated a million times, but there’s also a million reasons to why I haven’t. What I’m trying to say is that when the idea of it was first introduced with that judgement and hostility, it just reinforced the idea that there was something severely wrong with me. That I was an abnormality that had to be fixed. And yes, I’m sick, but there’s not something necessarily wrong with that. And I just... Oh, wow, I’m crying, this is not cool.
You didn’t ask to hear my sob story, but I just... This is such a dilemma, because I do love my mother, I really do. But I just feel like I’m never going to be able to trust her with this part of my life. Which is frustrating.
And I’ll stop rambling now. But I guess I just wanted you to know that I’m here? I know what you’re going through, and I’m always here to support. We can be each other’s mom’s and help each other when our own mother’s can’t.
And remember to take care of yourself! <3
