Sometimes I get a little dreamy about Voyager and how things could have been for some people…
What if that Q who wanted to commit suicide had never died and had stayed on Voyager? I think he would have been a great contribution to the crew, besides providing some really funny moments…
What if Denara had been cured of phagia and had been integrated into the crew too? She and the Doctor could have developed a relationship…
What if Janeway and Chakotay had had more time on New Earth to develop a relationship and after that they could no longer run away from their love? They would have been the most perfect command couple in the Delta Quadrant and they certainly both would have been so happy!
What if, by some irony of fate, Seven could have met Axum again? They could have learned about humanity together and had a very comfortable and learning relationship.
And everything would have been in its place… I think I'm going to cry now.
Me and my romanticizing mania!
Summary: The Doctor comforts Denara when she worries about returning home.
Pairing: The Doctor x Denara
Warnings: Mentions of illness
Word Count: 741
A/N: Thank you again to@faerhardyn-the-raging-ethereal for another request!! I am so excited to be getting requests so definitely keep 'em coming! Hope you enjoy!
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The medbay of Voyager was quiet, something that very rarely happened. In the past, The Doctor had always taken advantage of these few quiet moments to continue his studies, whether that be his medical studies or his personal ones. There was never a time The Doctor wasn’t busy doing something, somewhere; he didn’t require rest, after all.
However, that changed when Denara boarded the ship.
Since her arrival, he felt like his life had been turned upside down in all the best ways. As a hologram, he had never imagined being able to get a spare moment to himself, let alone be able to leave medbay to spend time with someone he cared for. Yet, there they lay in the holosuite surrounded by the mirage of a starry field.
“This is beautiful. It reminds me of the first time we did this.” Denara sighed, looking up at the multitude of stars. “I forgot that the stars seem so much grander from down here.”
The Doctor nodded, tightening his arm around her waist and pointing up at one of the constellations. “From here, you can see them as constellations, like the Big Dipper, and just over there is the Little Dipper.”
“Are they truly named after cutlery?” She chuckled, turning her gaze to look up at The Doctor instead.
“Yes, but they’re part of larger constellations called Ursa Major and Ursa Minor. They’re shaped like an animal found on Earth.”
“Ah, I see.”
“But you’re not looking at them anymore,” he pointed out, although he could really have cared less. The loving gaze she was sending his way made his chest swell with pride, and he caressed her face gently. “Though I suppose I could forgive you just this once.”
She giggled, wrapping her arms around his torso and resting her head against his chest. “You suppose?”
“I couldn’t possibly get upset with you.”
They lapsed into a comfortable silence, basking in each other’s company. It wasn’t long before she would have to leave Voyager, but the less said about that, the better. Focusing on the soft grass swaying around them and the milky way above them was much nicer, and the scenery was much less crushing.
It wasn’t until The Doctor began to feel a slight dampness on his chest that he looked down to find Denara crying, and he hurriedly took her face in his hands to wipe away the tears. “Denara, what’s wrong?”
“I…” She paused to gather her thoughts, tears still streaming down her face. “I will miss this, miss you. Even though I know I have to return to my colony, it still hurts.”
“I know, but at least we have this time together. We can make the most of the time that we do have.”
“What if we had more?” Her eyes explored his imploringly. “Time, I mean?”
The Doctor gave her a bittersweet smile, shaking his head. “But we can’t. Without you, there’s no hope of beating the Phage.”
She nodded, already knowing that to be the case. The sadness that had lodged itself inside her only continued to grow as the tears continued to stream down her face. Why was the one person in her life who saw her for exactly who she was the one person she couldn’t be with? She felt that fate had played a cruel trick on her, one even worse than when she had contracted the Phage in the first place.
The Doctor could tell that her mind was racing with only negative thoughts that would serve to spiral her into a depression more profound, and he began to hum “I Only Have Eyes for You.” He continued to whisk away the tears as soon as they would fall on her cheeks, not allowing them to stay for a moment. The fact that their time would eventually expire hurt him too, but he couldn’t manage to dwell on it. Not when he had her in his arms. As a physician and as her lover, he felt it was his duty to make sure that as long as she was with him on Voyager, her time was spent laughing and having fun.
When she quieted, almost starting to doze off, he whispered, “Even if we’re apart, I will always love you, so no tears. I want to remember all the good things.”
“No tears,” she agreed. Her eyes slipped shut, and her breathing evened out as she fell fast asleep.
Items listed in chronological order from time they were posted. Will be updated as more are posted.
I’m Not Leaving You - Tara has lost almost everything there is to lose. Luckily, there's one thing left that's promised to always stay. Tara/Rosita, 6.2k. TWs: panic attacks, trauma, slight nsfw.
The Look of Mischief In Your Eyes - Rosita hasn’t seen Tara’s smile in days. All she wants is for her to wake up. Tara/Rosita, 2.1k. TWs: None.
If I’m Going To Go Crazy, I’m Glad It’s With You - A particularly hard day drags Rosita down. Luckily, Tara is there to pick her back up. Tara/Rosita, 1k. TWs: none.
All I've Ever Known Is How To Hold My Own, But Now I Want To Hold You, Too - Ten people went missing from the fair. Nine heads were found on the pikes. Somewhere out there, Tara is still alive - but for how long?Back at the Kingdom, Rosita is already gathering an army to get her back. But Tara is in the clutches of the Whisperers, a people who have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Rosita is determined to save her, but at what cost? Tara/Rosita, 18k. TWs: PTSD, nightmares, graphic violence.
We Stick Together And We See It Through - Wounds this deep take a long time to heal. Having friends like Jesus helps. Tara & Jesus, 1.4k. TWs: mentioned character death.
Crimson and Clover - Glenn and Tara both need some help. He doesn't want to care about her, but something about Tara makes that hard. Glenn & Tara, 1k. TWs: graphic injury depiction.
Something to Stay For - An ambush has many unexpected consequences. Tara/Rosita, Tara & Rick, 3.7k. TWs: graphic injury and assault.
Everything To Me - In which Tara never left Alexandria, and finds Rosita injured after fleeing the Whisperers. (9x07) Tara/Rosita, 1.2k. TWs: graphic injury.
You Matter To Me - Tara can't sleep when it storms. But she doesn't mind being awake. Tara/Denise, 489 words. TWs: none.
It's One Hell of a Ride (HIATUS) - Three years after a terrible accident involving a future police officer serving his probationary period with seasoned officer Rick Grimes, Rick is again thrown into the training saddle. This time, he's paired up with Tara Chambler, three days out of the police academy, extremely optimistic, and absolutely clueless. Rick is determined not to get attached. Tara asks far too many questions and he's probably just going to lose her anyway. But Tara has an extremely irritating way of getting people to like her, and Rick slowly finds himself to be no exception. Tara & Rick, Tara/Rosita, Rick/Michonne, 33.3k. TWs: graphic injury, character death.
see how the world could be (in spite of the way that it is) - Tara has always had an unusual relationship with death. She's not afraid to die. But that doesn't mean she has to die alone. Tara & Glenn, Tara & Jesus, Tara/Denise, 3.1k. TWs: violence, graphic injury, and major character death.
till it all feels so small - Maggie and Glenn's baby is about to make an entrance and Tara doesn't know how to feel. Tara & Glenn, Tara & Maggie, Glenn/Maggie, 1.4k. TWs: mentioned character death.
Five Times Daryl Dixon Said No Homo, and One Time He Didn't - Daryl/Jesus, Daryl & Tara, 2k.
you learn to live like an animal in the jungle where we play - Tara isn't like anyone Denise has ever known. Maybe that's what makes her so precious. Denise/Tara, 1.5k. TWs: PTSD, nightmares, past trauma.
just keep your hand in mine (your hand feels so grand in mine) - When Maggie starts to wonder if she's pregnant, all she feels is dread instead of joy. Until Glenn steps in. Maggie/Glenn, 2.2k. TWs: past trauma, some past violence.
the sight of you will prove to me i'm still alive - Someone needs to take Tara to bed, and Maggie appears to be the only person sober enough for the job. Maggie & Tara, Maggie/Glenn, 2.7k. TWs: Past trauma, past character death.
just a few more - Tara’s teaching Denise to fight, but Denise isn’t suited to it at all. She is, however, pretty suited to Tara Chambler. Denise/Tara, 542 words. TWs: none.
Put An End To My Suffering - Tara's sick and insists she's got nothing less serious than the Black Death. At least she has a pretty great roommate. Tara & Jesus, 754 words. TWs: vomiting.
ex-lifeguard - The plan was supposed to be simple. Then all hell broke loose. Tara & Jesus, Jesus & Maggie, Tara & Maggie, Tara & Daryl, 2.1k. TWs: drowning.
take my hand (take my whole life too) - Glenn is gone and it hurts. But Tara's made him a promise, and she intends to keep it. Just maybe not in the way anyone expected. Maggie/Tara, Tara & Glenn, 6.9k. TWs: past character death, suicide thoughts.
here you come again - They can't seem to stop meeting like this. A crowded bar, a drink that Denise had to get her brother to order for her, and the strangest girl she's ever known, with a funny-looking cocktail and a tattoo of a little ghost on her arm. It's the same every time. Tara is a comforting familiarity that still knocks Denise off her feet, every single time. Denise/Tara, 3.7k. TWs: nsfw, sexual content, anxiety.
Meaning of the name Denara: “Child of Heaven & Earth”.
A feminine variation of Denis, deriving from the Greek mythological name Dionysius. Dionysius was the god of wine and partying, he is also known as Bacchus. He was the son of Zeus, king of the gods, and Semele, a mortal woman, making him a demigod. He is known for being born twice, once on Earth and then again in Heaven after being grafted to Zeus’ thigh and finishing his gestation/regrowing. It is a strange story which you can read more about here.
