ticci toby headcanons☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★
before I get started with this thingie, it's probably gonna end up long, so please find the patience 🧡 I've had hyperfixation on this man since I was 8 and am a total nerd about him. also I do view him as a 17 year old boy so like-
enjoy 🧡
look-wise:
dark eyes, dark brown hair with slight curls and the haircut = tobs, I make him look similarly in my art:
definitely lots of freckles, scars from tics/previous bullying and beating from his father.
music:
loud music most of the time, quieter when having a depressive episode (bipolar disorder) or if he can feel a tic attack comin
by loud music I mean either scene/emo, numetal, punk or artists like RomancePlanet.
Get scared, PtV, Set it off, Falling in reverse, sex pistols are definitely the bands I cannot imagine Toby without.
considering his disorders:
I sure hope we all know that its confirmed (i think) that he has Bipolar disorder (imo mix of BP 1 and BP 2, leaning to BP 1 tho), Tourettes syndrome (tic disorder that can be diagnosed during young teen years after lasting for over a year, it's a mix of verbal and motor involuntary and repeated movements. sometimes these tics can graduate to a tic attack, which is a state where the tics worsen, can be more violent- lasts from few minutes to hours) and CIPA (congenital insensitivity to pain with anhidrosis, rare disorder of the nervous system which prevents the feeling of pain or temperature [cant sweat and feel extreme temperatures], these signs of CIPA are present from infancy. )
I dont know if its also canon that he has schizophrenia, but Id rather say that most of his psychosis comes from bipolar disorder [manic episodes]
I love to talk about his disorders, theyre really interesting 🧡
i also think he has hypermobility, even if in the slightest. + I think that he still has body issues even if he cant feel pain. like his body will just give out, making him fall sometimes, faint, sleep for excessive bit of time.
personality and a bit of his life:
it was stated that he doesn't have a certain personality, very chaotic at best. but I do have my own little interpretation. Toby was a relatively calm baby and child, due to the fact that he really couldn't feel most shit and where he was raised it was very quiet at times. his mother and lyra were the one that raised him, his father either wasn't there physically, which was almost always, well and when he was, he was drunk and beat the living crap out of them all.
tho when Toby was like 10 or so, all of his disorders just kept worsening on him. tics got more unbearable, he developed a stress disorder of some kind at least, school was a shithole where he was mocked every second of his existence. (his bipolar definitely got diagnosed around 13 and his tics at like 10) that's why he dropped out if school and was home schooled. during these years, before the accident, he was the definition of a sarcastic dipshit, took stuff seriously only sometimes, was pretty much numb to other people's emotions except the ones he was emotionally connected to (mom and Lyra). after the accident, well, he was even worse, genuinely barked our sarcastic shit at everyone round him, got severely depressed, to the point of derealization and psychosis (linked to bipolar)
general headcanons, all smushed into one:
• not straight but doesn't label (most of the people he was interested in were men) , he/him pronouns
• he was definitely extremely smart. people interpret him as stupid due to his disabilities but he's very smart, both academically and in general.
• if we're talking about being smart, he was basically a doctor at that point. he knew most disorders, disabilities, illnesses. most of them he learned just for himself, but also to understand other people (the misunderstood not wanting to misunderstand others)
• bro could calm a person with a panic attack in less than 10-20 minutes
• he had shit ton of interests, took his mind to a different place. he could also draw well and was damn good in interior design? (dont even ask)
• his room, both at home and slender mansion were comfortable. big beds with duvets, many pillows, plushies, rugs, he had dim lights, and other shit. small rooms always but comfortable enough for when his disorders act up.
• deffo has 'safe people'. the only ones that can touch him, be with him when shit gets bad, talks to them everyday without breaks, just can be himself. other people are a big no and he wont show a single speck of his personality.
• loves supernatural/horror movies, stories, games, anything with ghosts, entities, killers, shit like that.
• really bad stutters, linked to tourettes id say. bro will stutter 10 times in 3 word sentence and look at you like it's your fault. dead in the eyes.
• manic laughter or the smallest giggle. nothin in between btw
• bro CAN be nice but won't until something is really bad/ unless he's in a very good mood
• no he does not like waffles. guys can we not. Id say his favorite food would be something salty/spicy actually. or fucking pizza 🥀. also he's lowkey picky with food. like sure he cant feel pain but bro will get personally offended if something tastes like shit.
• bro has immaculate style, fight with the wall.
• only half German but he knows the languages fluently, even has a small accent.
• oh and there are stimulants in his room btw. not only dim light, no no, he has candles, diffusers (is that how u call it?) fidget toys, and even some silly lights (night sky lamp, trust.)
• NERD. NERD NERD NERD. something caught his interest? he's in. deep.[sybau]
• loves animals. and big dogs.
• comfort game: Sally face, fight with the wall, relates to Sal to some extent
knows this song word for word and sings it everyday (for years on end)
thats all for now I think, will deffo write shit ton about him tho ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚
also definitely suffers from loneliness if u get me
