#diary core

[poetrybylila]

i relapsed.

i smoked 🍃 for the first time since november of 2024.

everything got too much; the world swallowing me whole; my gut emptying to hollow; my heart beating frantically at the trapping of a vice.

so i succumbed to the relief. erased months of perseverance, strength, growth.

at least now I’ve got more to write about.

- the dangers of romanticising pain as a poet

[poetrybylila]

someday, someone will read what i wrote and they’ll feel it in their bones. and when that day comes, i hope they feel a little freer than the day before it.

[poetrybylila]

to live without art is to live without breath.

[poetrybylila]

my heart lurches into my throat and lodges at the back like a jagged-edge stone. my lungs sprout wings and fly away.

the aching of their absence in my chest is heavy, despite my rib cage housing hollow. my skin jumps and begs to rip free.

i wake, and it is not a dream. my body is running from me, yet my mind will not free itself- it delights in it's cranial prison.

i wake, and your body is still rotting 6 feet under, your heart and lungs and skin and mind no more- but i cannot gift mine.

[poetrybylila]

the time has come. i am now debuting on substack. go find me and give me some love!

it’s about damn time.

young australian woman who masquerades as a poet joins substack. i hope you like my mini, one-cut vibe.

[poetrybylila]

performing an aesthetic, @ home, by myself.

yikes.

[pixelruins]

i don’t know what this is yet.

maybe a diary. maybe a landfill.

maybe just a place to feel something quietly.

this is for the things i don’t say out loud.

the blurry thoughts, the midnight versions of me,

and all the broken pixels that still glow.

[stxrfaced]

Low key consider detransitioning to be a cute girl again (/nsrs)

LIKE I LOOK SO GOOD. I couldn't live like this tho. Maybe I could? Idk I know in every fantasy I've ever had I'm a guy. I wish I could be a guy all along because I miss being a girl bc I did this and I looked this good for actual YEARS. 16 yrs of this. If I didn't have that I wouldn't ever miss it. Sighs.