#dildos?

[emostonergorl]

dildos just don't get the job done the way a dick can

[iamayeti]

(Scene, the roomie grabs a fourth go-gurt and wants to do the name and two nouns herself this time)

Roomie: Don Juan, dildo, and whore will be the words.

Me: I like the sequel going here

Roomie: Don Juan wore a dildo on his whore

[madsbluroses]

Hildalgo

My sis and I are watching hidalgo and she keeps saying hidaldo and I keep hearing Hildildo... What even

[laundromatlament-blog]

There is a peculiar vibrating noise coming from behind my roommate's door, but I'm slightly confused because he's a boy?

[pikachuchickpika]

Me: Get me a 52" screen TV on black friday!

Boyfriend: You don't suck my cock enough to have that! How about this.. you stick that dildo in the room, into your ass starting from today, to Friday, then I'll do that!

Me: Nothing is going up my ass

Boyfriend: Exactly. You're not getting a big screen tv from me.

Me: FINE GET ME A $20 LAPTOP AT WALMART! Or a few things at Hot topic!

Boyfriend: Maybe. What kind of laptops they have on sale?

Me: HP and Acers for only $20 on black Friday!

Boyfriend: Damn. I may grab 3 laptops then.

Me: Oh damn. We'll be laptop rich!

Boyfriend: Shut up wise ass.

Me: Big screen tv!

Boyfriend: Start shovin that dildo up your ass if you want that tv!

Me: I'll be happy with a laptop.

Boyfriend: Good. Good choice, girl.

[scruffyprincess]

where do you even get a 24 inch horse dildo? and what did I even do to you?