⭐️ can you tell us more about tommy fighting with excel??
My job consists of a lot of spreadsheets, and sometimes all the functions in Excel work like they should, and sometimes I make a mistake that I then have to painstakingly go through the cells to find to fix, and sometimes Excel just refuses to do something for no fucking reason! I hate it so much!
Since Tommy is my little guy I thought it’d be a fun joke to also have him frustrated at Excel and all its bullshit. And we all know that Clipboard Buck is absolutely a spreadsheet guy. Look at him. He gets so exited over color coding the cells.
“You gotta keep calm,” Evan said as he highlighted several rows and typed in an equation that was as Lovecraftain as it was incomprehensible. “Excel can smell your fear.”
“Jesus Christ,” Tommy said, “you’re like a horse girl but for spreadsheets.”
Buck’s generous mouth hooked into a filthy smirk. "Are you going to try to pretend that doesn't do it for you?"
Tommy sighed, and said, “Save that file and take off your pants.”
One of the most intriguing fics of all times is your "A Moon lit in Paradise" for me. The idea of using the opulent, expansive descriptions of rooms – in which the hero only appears at the very end like yet another decorative element – to convey Fenris’s desperate situation is brilliant. And i love all these exquisite (!!) descriptions. I’ve certainly not read nearly enough fanfiction, but it seems to me that detailed descriptions of settings are a rare thing. Where did you draw your inspiration from—firstly, in terms of the overall concept, and secondly, regarding the individual, vivid and intense descriptions? Do they just flow from your mind, or do you need time to find them, or is it a mixture? What do you pay particular attention to, what is important to you? 💖⭐️💖⭐️💖⭐️💖❣️
Oooh, this is a hard one 🙊😳🙈 I'm gonna give it my best okay? 😅
Firstly, thank you for sending this 💗 as always I'm speechless and don't know what to say 🖤
I thought about answering this only in a private message because talking about this feels very... intimate for me. 🤯 But since I guess no one except you's going to read this anyways I'm posting this publicly lol
😳 See for my (way too) long answer under the cut!
This is a hard one... 🤔 I'm pretty bad at talking about (my own) writing or remembering from where I drew inspiration from.
Because this is so long I tried to structure it a bit
Inspiration
Almost all of my works are inspired through 3 things, namely music and nature. Most scenes start to play out like a movie (I guess this is true for most writers!) while walking in nature listening to music. It must be a new song and somehow while walking (or riding my bike) that combination of movement/light exercise and new melodies just... starts something. A scene. A character's facial expression. A character's movement. Anything.
Also, often nature starts something like watching a beautiful sundown or the sway of grassy fields. I often walk in the evening and often study the colors of the sky and sinking sun very closely for future references and ponder how I would describe it with words. I tend to observe the moon, its light and clouds very acutely for future reference, too! I do the same with flowers or trees in the woods or flowing water in the river... I just love watching natural movements or colors.
I've been trying to put into words what I see and feel from early kindergarten on 🙈
I cannot remember a time when I wasn't fascinated by nature and words or when I didn't think about how to tell or describe something. I was a strange kid who thought about (easy) morphology (though I had no word for it back then XD) at a very young age. At the supermarket I always pretended to "read" the magazines there to show people I knew how to read already (which I totally didn't 😂) and couldn't wait to go to school so I could actually learn it! I often begged my parents to teach me read and write but they said I was too young lol.
But I was very lucky to have a dad who read many, many books to us children and even harder ones when I begged him (my sister wasn't that enthusiastic about it though and didn't always like me for it XD.)
So this... zest and excitement for (written) words has always been pretty crazy with me XD 🤣
The third thing that inspires me is simple: READING
I love books and written words. When I want to write a poem, I read poems first to get me in the right mood (and make my brain think in iambs and rhymes XDDD). If I want to write in German, I read a German book, if I want to write in English i read an English novel (again to make my brain switch languages and think they way I want it to).
While reading I almost always get inspired (as long as my mind is not too busy with work or worries which it is most of the times hence the long periods of time i take writing...). Now you would think I get inspired by what I actually read, and sometimes it is, the mood, the atmosphere... but more often it's just a single word. A simple noun or verb or adjective. Like "skin" or "soar" or "lit" (these are more recent examples). From this one word often springs a single simile or metaphor or something like it... I have tons of bits of paper everywhere and note pads lying around, even in my bathroom and in every book to write everything down I come up with XD
And most often a fic or scene evolves from this simple word or simile or metaphor. I remember it when I go for a walk and if I hit the right song... it just evolves. I can't describe it very well >.< but I guess this is what it's like for many if not most authors!!! <3 🖤
(btw the music bit also works when I'm driving my car so I have a simple audio record app on my phone to record any fragments I come up with lest I forget them again and they're gone forever! To be honest it's a bit dangerous XD but I usually stop pull over so I can stop and record with full concentration. More often than not I note things down by writing because I'm way better with written words than spoken ones!)
(Chaotic) Writing Process
Finally, I end up with a thousand (rather more) snippets of papers, sometimes with only a few sentences or words on them, sometimes many with cohesive scenes on them!
This happens before I actually start writing a chapter/fic and while writing.
More often than not I don't start writing right away but let a new idea simmer and evolve with more of that same music and some more walks.
Another curious thing is that I almost never start writing something before I have a title (for fics that is) because... without a title I haven't found the "Leitmotiv" for the fic yet and thus don't know yet what it's actually going to be about. 🤔
Most often, the title is one of the very first things I come up with when letting the first idea simmer and develop.
Haha, that was a lot of rambling without actually answering your quesitons!!! 🙈😳
A Moon Lit in Paradise
So about "A Moon lit in Paradise":
Due to all the things mentioned above it's very hard for me to reconstruct my own writing process in the aftermath especially when I'm in the middle of another process for another fic/story/chapter.
But I remember two incidents:
Every summer my family and I drive to a small lake outside town to watch the Perseids meteor shower. A few years ago I suffered from a disc prolapse in my lower back so I couldn't lie on the ground for long so I started walking and listening to music in the moonlight. I remember the moon being so bright I could actually observe my own shadow and those of the trees moving in the azure-blue night which was absolutely fascinating.
Around that time I also read a particular scene in a book by one of my favorite Indian authors. I specifically remember reading the word "moonlight" and somehow these two events resulted in that fic.
I tried to find the actual handwritten documents with the fic to reconstruct more of the process and show you but my apartment is such a mess of papers and tons of writing pads and "Schulhefte" scribbled over with stuff I gave up finding it 😅🤣😅
I don't even remember which song it was that inspired me but should I hear it again I shall know in an instant because I listened to it all the time while writing!
While a part of my writing process is very chaotic... well, once I sit down it becomes more structured. I know where to insert all the little parts and longer scenes I wrote down haphazardly on any paper available because the whole text is structured out in my head. Although that doesn't mean that when actually writing new things don't add themselvevs to the text... this actually happens every time! (certainly true for all writer out there 🖤).
Like.... I think a lot about every word, every sentence and every part. About the sequence of sentences and scenes.
I love literary devices, I actually squeal internally whenever I read one, so I deliberately use a lot of them. A lot of times I create more versions of a simile/metaphor/allegory/etc because I don't only want it to be vivid and visually persuasive but also FITTING regarding metre, vowels and first letters (as in assonance and alliteration), syntax and order of ideas (e.g. chiasmus or hysteron-proteron ) but also overall imagery. It should fit not only the sentence at hand but the overall chapter/fic and atmosphere and the characters, of course.
Sound and rythm and content and vibrance overall matching imagery is all very, very important to me.
Which means I rewrite and rewrite things a lot and have many versions to choose from in the end XDDDD
The last step is when I finally sit down in front of my laptop to type everything in a simple word document. This is the last stage when I combine and fuse all those handwritten versions and choose what words to use exactly. It also takes a lot of time with me because I read all things again and again to make sure they fit my taste... and even here several versions still crop up! Only just before publishing I will obliterate all other versions and choose the one I think are most appropriate which can take... again a lot of time XDDD
So here you go, that's why I'm the slowest writer in the universe 😆🌌 (and also because I can only write when I'm relaxed and not stressed out from work which... doesn't happen so often)
You asked about the descriptions 💗 and I must admit that those who've read my original writing tend to mock me for my descriptions a lot 😂😂😂 I love reading/creating dense atmosphere and it shows! In addition, I love symbolism and psychologizing the surroundings and objects to elucidate a character's inner life and emotions, especially surpressed emotions.
So most of my writing is full of waaaaay to long and detailed descriptions (in order to write them I look at things very closely in real life especially while writing).
My sister likes to joke "Oh, a new chapter? I bet it begins with a sundown and ends with a curtain moving in some... way. And that's it. That's the whole chapter. 100 pages of sundown and moving curtains. Ah yes, we will also have detailed info on which funiture crowds the room and how the faiding ligh of said sundown looks on it. The main character's name will be.... noted. Once. Yep. That's going to be the whole freaking chapter of 200 pages. " 😂🤣
I tone this down for my angbang fics because I in my opinion it's not really fitting Melkor's voice and perception of the world. He will certainly describe things he's in awe of - like Mairon and his own work - in great detail but I would never introtuce him like in "A Moon Lit in Paradise" because his focus is so much different (mostly on himself) because he's a divine being and perceives time and places much differently from normal human beings.
But with Fenris and Hawke who are completely normal (elven and human) beings... especially Fenris who is a deeply traumatized character I can use things like this <3 not only because it's a favorite literary device of mine but also because there are things like dissassociation in psychology (but I don't want to go into detail on this lest this text gets longer than the Lord of the Rings and the Silmarillion combined XD).
Btw, another one of my favorite literary devices is synesthesia 🖤 which you probably knew! 🤣😂
Like I said, when I describe a scene... it's very vivid in my mind and I try to study things like wood or marble in real life in order to be able to find words for them. I... can't describe it any better 😭 so sorry!
That all being said, I feel like I answered your questions in a very haphazard, nebulous and vague manner 😔 I'm so sorry that I can't make myself any clearer!
If you're still reading you've earned yourself PRIZE STICKER!!! 😘😘😘
AND some sweets!!!
You earned them!!!
Also sorry for rambling so much and explaining all of this in the most vague and longest way possible XD
Chongqing (End of an Era) — Director’s Commentary Transcript
Chongqing has always been one of my favorite missions — and one that I think is really underrated in terms of storytelling.
You can really tell from the director’s commentary how much thought and depth the devs put into this mission — they truly got it.
I couldn’t find this director’s commentary anywhere on the wikis, so I took some time to transcribe it myself.
[Director’s Commentary]
Welcome to Chongqing and the mission where Agent 47 is about to kill his past.
We want this to be our in-city level.But a different one.
In a big Chinese metropolis,you could expect big dense crowds but we felt like going in a direction that would better match the mood and feel of this mission.
We have two targets,but this is more or less a hit on the ICA;we are here to take them down for good and forever break all the ties with the institution that gave Agent 47 purpose for so long.
Coming from a booming rave with big crowd,we wanted something more serene and calm.
A night mission,backstreets.Very noir,very secretive.And the rain,of course.
Not only there to give us location variety,but also to enhance the feeling that after this mission,there is no going back to how things were before;it is a point of no return.
There are no more ICA-sanctioned targets after this mission.
But it is also another very important step for 47 and his path to his own agency.
The hope is that also reflected in the composed music,with the church-like choir.
Somewhere in this location is a big ICA facility,hiding away in plain sight.
We wanted player to explore and look around spending time in the rain before finding their way in.
So,at the surface this mission is a bit harder with entrance that are not always so easy to find.
It‘s a location where shady things are going on-and the player is encouraged to explore and discover.
We have two different fortresses in this location,and while they share a theme of being very high tech and futuristic,they still very different in their nature.
The actual ICA facility is clean,professional and focused.
It’s about big data and it’s the space where the target,Royce,resides and where she is conducting her experiments,trying to bring the ICA into the future.
The other fortress is wilder and more rough,where shady experiments are taking place,not sanctioned at all by the ICA.
It’s an adhoc,improvised space,a place where the other target,Hush,is trying to realize his vision of the future of the ICA….and he definitely has a different approach than that of Royce.
But in line with the themes of the Hitman games,they both,in slightly different ways,are about control,agency and predictability.
This is also something we lean into with the story arc of 47.
There is always somewhere telling him what to do.
We wanted to really show the relationship between Diana and 47 in this mission,and we do that in the ICA dat core hack event.
In this moment,47 looks back at his past and is starting to realize the type of relationship he has with Diana.
Who is in control here?
And also,what is she doing in this very moment?
It is supposed to be part nostalgic and part forward moving as 47 deletes all of these moments and then uploads the rest of the ICA files,exposing them to the world-killing his past.
the neon lights, the endless rain, and the only time we saw the quiet solitude of 47 standing alone. It’s a mission about endings, identity, and a strange kind of peace. I hope this transcript reaches others who feel the same way.
“No one does that if they don’t care.”
As the world spins and an era comes to an end, we can still catch a glimpse of connection that feel almost eternal.
I saw your recent reblog about director’s commentary. Will you do one on M&P? I’d like to hear how you balance present events with flashbacks.
Yep, that's why I reblogged it!
For the present events & flashbacks, I usually do
1. Flashback at beginning of chapter
2. Flashback at end of chapter
3. Flashback in middle of chapter
First two are the easiest, they get their own sections and they can work on their own without a "trigger"
Flashbacks in middle of chapter are ones that are let's say "triggered" by what is happening in the present, something that Reader connects with Rosinante (or Law) or some thought she has makes her remember a moment with Rosinante or Law in her life.
Such as food (cabbage, pancakes, riceballs), a picture (such as when Reader saw Rosinante looking cool sitting beside Doflamingo in a picture in Ch8 — ch9 for those who read M&P on AO3 — it reminded her of how cool he looked when he defended her in Water 7 and shoved that guy down and what happened between them after that event), or a thought of "oh Rosi would like this" or "Rosi would/wouldn't do that".
I try to show that it's very hard for Reader to spend so much time with Doflamingo bcs of the simple fact she's spending time with Rosinante's brother but also Rosinante's killer. He's a walking "Rosinante memory" trigger cus she keeps thinking how Rosinante would do things that Doflamingo does.
I try to purposefully NOT have Reader refer to Doflamingo as her brother-in-law that many times in the story cus currently her view of him is more connected to Rosinante's relationship with Doflamingo than her relationship with Doflamingo. Which, of course, as her relationship with Doflamingo extends, she'll start seeing Doflamingo as her connection more and as an individual more.
I always try to connect the flashback that happens in the middle of the chapter to something - a thought Doflamingo or Reader have, a feeling they feel, a picture they see, even a book (for example Law's Human Anatomy book may trigger a memory in Doflamingo) can have a flashback follow it. Memories have emotions attached to them, so even an emotion can trigger a flashback.
So that's pretty much how I try to "connect" the present events and the flashbacks.
And the flashbacks at beginning or end of chapter are either 1) Doflamingo's POV 2) Reader's POV 3) Law's POV 4) a little of Rosinante's POV I try to limit him cus he's DEAD but I do love writing his POV he's so sweet 🥹
This is one of my absolute favorite clips from the behind the scenes of an episode of Stargate Atlantis that was a crossover with the original Stargate series, where Daniel Jackson comes to the Atlantis base.
Sorry, I should've included the link in my first post. I also realize now looking back it was a reblog, not your original post so I suppose that's why there's no source.
It was this post: https://www.tumblr.com/dianaburnwood/643397944055332865/diana-47-exist-ioi-does-literally-everything
No problem!
@greengoldfish here’s the link from kind anon!
Unfortunately I don’t know where the quote’s from, it might be the poster’s own quote. @diseven might remember!
It’s not the same thing but you might be interested in this director’s commentary of the Mendoza mission which raises the same kind of point: https://www.tumblr.com/dianaburnwood/660934008280104960/dianaburnwood-ummm-excuse-me-i-just
Y’all are gonna make me tap the “director commentary” sign huh
If ppl don’t believe the game’s director, they’re not gonna believe my cute
