#divorcematsu

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Osomatsu-san AU OCs' designs!

(More infos about my AU in pinned <3)

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Divorcematsu AU relationships!

Also some UGLY relationship charts ;)

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Her cunt

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Since I am very normal about this au, I was thinking about Tomiko and Totty

As in, they are kinda similar, both in their presentation and in a role they take in their family as the weak one, being used and discarded

Therefore, my question is, does Todomatsu sometimes see his past self in Tomiko? If yes, does he despise it in her? Or kind of enjoys finally being the one who gets to hurt the weak one?

DAMN, YOU THINKING ABOUT THIS WAY DEEPER THAN I AM ADJSIAFDJASOFDASOP

I now declare it's canon that Totty sees his past self in her, but he doesn't despise her, more like both annoyed and glad for her existence at the same time. He would've not choose her if she was any different than now, because her being so gulliable and easy to gaslight and manipulate—while also being rich—is what made him approach her. He sees her more as a wallet and a doll; he always liked being spoiled, so having someone who has the money to spoil him is enough for him. Probably yes, he also finds satisfaction into being the one that is "superior" and stronger, but it's more a side thing, especially since he ignores her most of the time and gives her the bare minimum to keep the relationship up.

They've been together quite a while, but both of them know very little of each other. It's kind of like they're roommates who met just a week a go all the time.

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So, i had a question about Karamatsu's fishnet tank top. Obviously, hot as hell, what is the point of going on family reunion if you don't look sizzling hot and slutty. But Amelia just seems like a woman who wants to seem respectable and serious, so it's hard to imagine her buying Karamatsu something like this and she also makes all the money so he can't really buy it on his own...... That is to say, my ask is, did Kara just put this tank top with other clothes they were buying like a mischievous child would try to sneak candies in his mothers grocery cart OR does Amelia actually like dressing Kara up in cunty little outfits?

You seriously think Amelia saw a cunty man with the fattest ass trapped in the tightest lather pants ever and thought she had to cover those up? His cuntiness was one of the reasons she fell in love with him (yes, she is straight forward when it comes to having sex, but that doesn't mean she doesn't feel sexual attraction or that she represses her sexuality; she just normally has a lower libido - or at least lower than Kara).

IF he had a job like hers or was her coworker, absolutely she'd be dressing him more elegantly, but he's usually in a room at her hotel or at home or around, he doesn't accompany her to meetings or similar, so she doesn't really care. And yes, she buys outfits for him, or just lets him choose what he wants when they go shopping together. She loves fashion too and sees Karamatsu's choices as either or both fashionable and/or sexy (depending on the outfit).

Also, Amelia believes in body autonomy lol. Not everything in their marriage sucks, otherwise they wouldn't be married in the first place.

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Why is Tsubame so hung on fixing Oso? You wrote on the chart that she had bad exes, is it connected somehow? From the biggest Tsubame fan

While her exes were just assholes that think about sex and nothing else, Oso was pathetic enough to show actual emotions and vulnerability (while drunk, but still). She saw actual struggles and problems and she thought that, for once, a guy could change for the better. Basically, she saw something in him that is not exactly correct ("oh he cares so much about his family and just doesn't want to be alone :( i can give him everything he needs and we'll both be happy then!" ← so fucking WRONG)

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WAIT DO THE WIVES KNOW ABOUT MATSUS HIGHSCHOOL SELVES???? HOW WOULD THEY REACT ON SEEING THEIR PHOTOS FROM HIGH SCHOOL????

Wepp, time to answer for each wifey :D

Tsubame: She knows SHIT about Osomatsu's past. She always had to connect the dots to understand him and take bits out of his drunk talks, so uh, nope. She never saw an old photo of him either, since Oso keeps his photos way too closely, but she'd find him cute if she did.

Amelia: She knows some bits, has seen some photos of Kara as a teen, mostly group photos because Kara was too shy back then. She finds him adorable and cute, makes her soft to think about him all small and shy, but that's mostly romanticization; she knows she'd hate him a FUCKTON if he was still like that.

Aguri: Choromatsu lied about his past, of course. Mostly in front of Aguri's parents to win their daughter's hand. So now, when Aguri sees an old photo of Choro, she thinks he was cutely nerdy and respectable, a top student that looked and was actually smart and that had a glow up after highschool (she's totally brainwashed, somebody help her).

Minako: Ichi is SO embarrassed about his old self, he talked about it very little and always very nervously. Minako never questioned and just accepted to not bring that up much (of course she noticed all the forced smiles in his old pictures, of course she connected the dots), she's glad he's himself now :)

Homura: Jyushi is just as embarrassed as Ichi, but Jyushi hides it less, because he and Homura actually like to laugh about it (with affection). Jyushi sometimes acts like "a big bad guy" with his children to play with them.

Tomiko: Totty will DIE before telling Tomiko SHIT about himself, in general. All he said to her were LIES without even trying to make a backup and proofs like Choro did.

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It's so sad that Kara doesn't have children of his own, i know he would be...decent, at the very least. He would love his children for sure. Why isn't he a dad? Does he spend time with his nephews and nieces at least?

Amelia isn't sure about becoming a mother, but either way she doesn't want to get pregnant. They are talking about adopting, but still, Amelia is a very busy woman, Kara often sleeps in her hotel just to be able to see her.

He does ask often for photos and updates on his nephews and nieces' lives, but since he lives so far away (and so do the others) he doesn't really have the occasion to go and meet them. "But he doesn't have a job, he can just take a train and go" - he's dependent on Amelia for money, and she's the one in charge of regulating how much they spend and where. Also, his brothers and their partners do have jobs and their children are at the daycare, kindergarten or school etc. So it's not that easy to organize.