Scared One Shot
Requested by Anonymous
Pairings: Lena Luthor x Reader
Tags: Dom!Lena, Sub!Reader, Angst, Fluff, Affection, Comfort
Additional Notes : There might be an unhealthy element of the relationship described in this fic that can potentially trouble some readers. Please read with caution and be safe
Everything Taglist: @sammy90682 @nobody13 @owloftheshadows @captain-josslett @camslightstories @worldovart @finleyfray
You knew you messed up the moment it happened, and the look on Lena’s face was nothing short of acute fury and masked hurt. There you were, at work, sandwiched between your current girlfriend and your former, and Lena was just now finding out that you had a former girlfriend, who was actually your coworker. There was only one real thing that Lena required in their relationship: total and complete honesty. She had made it known since day one, and for her to find out from Kara that you and she had dated previously, illicit a response that you had dreaded the day you found out about her history of betrayal. The way her lush green eyes shifted angrily between you and Kara had you both shifting uncomfortably under her increasingly scrutinizing gaze. Kara laughed nervously, the act completely devoid of any humor as she scratched the back of her head nervously. You watched as she fiddled with a pen that she grabbed off her desk.
“I take it that you didn’t know?” she asked quietly, and Lena crossed her arms in front of her chest tightly.
“No.”
The response wasn’t clipped, but it did allow a small modicum of her disappointment to seep through, and it had you swallowing the growing lump in your throat. Her eyes swung to you and you couldn’t bring yourself to meet her gaze. You should have admitted to her that you had a relationship with Kara previously, and you definitely should had said something the day Kara asked if you would be willing to try their relationship again. Lena only found out because Kara had asked her how to ask you out again after the relationship had ended poorly. When she first asked you, all you could do was laugh and run away from the situation as fast as your legs would let you. You should have told Lena then. You should have, and now here you were, on the receiving end of her anger and disappointment. The full force of the latter emotion crashed into you like turbulent ocean waves and you knew that there would be an argument about it later tonight. Kara looked desperately at her desk and began to move things around.
“Oh look, here’s an assignment I must have missed,” she mumbled as she, more or less, excused herself from the situation.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. You, Kara, and Lena all knew that she was completely caught up with all of her assignments for the day. If she wanted to, she could have called it an early day.
“Lena-” you began but she shook her head slowly at you, and you choked on your words. She didn’t say another word. Lena turned on her heels, and with her head held high, and also with an elegance that you’ve come to love about her, marched away from you and into her office. Maybe she didn’t mean for you to see it, but as she began to close the office door, her shoulders slumped sadly and she held her forehead with her other hand. You knew, the moment you witnessed it happen, that you had hurt her.
Lena avoided you all day today. For the first couple of hours, you didn’t see her at all. If anything, you kept running into Kara and with each time you saw her, she gave you a sympathetic look that slowly turned into worry. Eventually she did approach you and almost gave you a hug but thought better of it.
“Y/n, I’m so sorry about Lena. I wish I had known or else I wouldn’t have said something.”
You sighed. “Don’t worry. It’s my fault. I should have told her from the beginning.”
Kara nodded but still looked worried. “Why didn’t you say that you were taken?”
All you could do was shrug. “I don’t know. I guess I was just scared. All the previous emotions from our relationship came bubbling up…and it was too much to handle.”
Kara looked guilty and you could tell that if she could take it back, she would have. “I wouldn’t worry about Lena too much. She’ll come around,” Kara said hoping it would calm you.
It was evident that Lena wouldn’t come around today. She was scarcely seen and when she was, it was always with someone else or during business meetings. You saw that it wouldn’t matter if you two were in the same room with a handful of other people, the moment she saw you, she would excuse herself and leave. You just wanted a chance to explain yourself, to explain your line of thinking. Was it too much to want to share your side of the story? You wanted nothing more than to pull her aside and just spill your guts, but you also realized that you couldn’t attack her with a barrage of explanations at any given moment. So, you decided that you would make her dinner. She would need a chance to decompress for a little before the conversation, and secretly, you knew that she was more amiable with a full stomach.
Later that night you were the first one home, and you crossed the threshold into your shared apartment with your girlfriend feeling heavy and apprehensive. Late nights like this were a guarantee especially when you worked at Catco, and for the time being, when Lena was your boss. It wasn’t like she assigned you copious amounts of work, it just so happened that there was always so much to do. However, thoughts of your busy day were immediately abandoned. You wanted everything to be perfect for when Lena came home. So, you cooked and cleaned, the cleaning one of your immediate outlets for your nervous energy, and once you were done, you waited. And waited….and waited. The minutes ticked on and slowly accumulated into hours. You checked the clock on the stove to see that it was well past one in the morning and the dinner that you had prepared was well past cold. You sighed as you cleaned and put everything away. It would seem that Lena wouldn’t come home tonight, and the assumption was made true when you slept in your shared bed alone.
The next day was very much the same. Lena was nowhere to be seen, and you found that you were having a hard time focusing on your work when your girlfriend was still livid with you. You hated it and you hated being here knowing that you couldn’t fix things the way you wanted, not when there were so many people around. When it was lunch time, you packed your belongings and decided to take all your work home. At least you would be able to cry in the privacy of your own place. You could see the sympathetic looks that Kara kept shooting your way and after a while, it was getting harder and harder to swallow down your tears. You had to leave, and you were almost completely packed up when Kara stopped at your desk.
“Y/n, can I treat you to lunch?” she asked timidly. You smiled, finding solace in her efforts to help, but you still shook her head.
“No thank you, I really should get out of here.”
Kara nodded and helped with your things, escorting you to the elevator and waving goodbye before the doors closed.
Within 30 minutes you were home, your work and shoes abandoned on the kitchen counter. The moment you walked through the door, it was like something inside of you snapped. You couldn’t stop the tears from falling, and before you knew it, you were in the bed, sobbing, with the blankets wrapped around you. You hated that Lena was so furious at you. There was absolutely nothing inside of you that wanted her mad, but for her to be angry for something you did had you shaking with terrified adrenaline. Everything inside of you wanted to make it better. You wanted to kiss and hug her and apologize until you either died or she told you to stop.
You were so deep into your regret that you didn’t hear a key unlocking the door, and the sound of Lena’s heels sounding off in the other room made you freeze.
“Y/n? Are you here?”
You didn’t know how to answer. If you said something, she would know that you were crying, but if you said nothing at all, then maybe she would think that you were hiding from her. It didn’t matter what you would have decided anyway. Lena was already on her way to the room where she saw you buried underneath the warm layers that were cocooning you inside.
“Y/n?”
You swallowed thickly. “Yeah?”
You heard her freeze before the bed dipped as she took a seat next to you. Her hands pulled the covers away and you held your breath when you face was reveled. Lena caressed your cheek before climbing inside your makeshift burrow and holding you close. You couldn’t help yourself as you cuddled into her as close as you could.
“Talk to me,” she offered.
You sniffed and nodded. Lena was kind and soft, patient and loving. Never once did she rush you, and you took a few deep breaths to make sure to speak as clearly as possible.
“I was so scared that you were disappointed in me, and when I didn’t see you yesterday or today, I thought that maybe you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore.”
Lena listened as you talked, and once she thought that you were done, she kissed your temple and smoothed some lose strands of your hair behind your ear. She was about to speak but you rambled on, getting more and more distressed.
“You can do whatever you want to me Lena. You can use me however you want. If you want to yell at me, you can. If you want to spank me, I’ll let you do it! You can do whatever you want, but please, please, don’t go silent on me again! I can’t take it!”
Lena’s grip on your body was still incredibly soft but went firm and steady as she still held you close.
“Y/n.”
Her voice was clear, precise. It rang with pristine and familiar authority, and before you could even comprehend what happened, your jaw snapped closed, and you were silent.
“I’m sorry that I scared you like that. Truly I am. My silence was never to teach you a lesson, but to calm myself down. I was so mad when I found out that you had been with Kara the same way that I am with you, and when she asked me advice on how to get you back, I don’t know. I assumed the worst. I assumed that you didn’t want to be with me anymore and that you couldn’t find a way to tell me.”
You shook your head. “No, no. I want to stay with you. I love you.”
Lena turned you around to face her and on her beautiful face, was the whitest and most flawless smile that you had ever seen. And right now, it was directed towards you. You heart skipped a beat, and you held your breath.
“I know that now. Today I realized how silly I’ve been, and how I’ve almost let past insecurities almost ruin what I have now. I have a beautiful relationship with you,” she whispered and then kissed you sweetly, almost softly. You returned the kiss eagerly, your hands pulling her closer to you by her clothes. Lena giggled.
“I wanted to talk to you last night, but I got hung up at work. Morgan Edge decided he wanted to try and discredit one of my inventions. I got swamped with so much paperwork and I was so exhausted that I passed out at my desk. Then today, I was bombarded by meetings all day from the board of directors. Today was…well, it was something.” Lena pulled you in closer and nuzzled you.
“This was not how I wanted your day to go and I’m so, so sorry that I couldn’t find you sooner. I’m sorry that I made you cry when I promised to always take care of you. You’re my number one priority but I didn’t treat you like that. I promise you this. The next time I’m angry, I won’t go silent on you again. I’ll do my very best to voice what’s on my mind, good or bad.”
You nodded and she cocked her eyebrow as her eyes gradually darkened. Her hands began to travel down your back until her fingers curled around the soft but firm muscle of your bottom.
“Naughty or nice.”
You squeaked when she gave you a playful squeeze. Lena laughed and kissed your tears away before rolling on to her back and taking you with her. Now, you rested on her chest, and she pulled the blankets over you to keep you warm and snuggled. You cuddled her close, burying your face into her neck and breathing in her scent. She smelled of expensive perfume and shampoo, and everything about it comforted you. Lena continued to rub your back and kiss your hairline until you drifted off into a relaxed sleep knowing that Lena Luthor, the love of your life, wasn’t going anywhere. She still wanted you, and there was nothing you could do to change that.
As your eyes drifted close, you heard her whisper into your ear. The words were soft and gentle, and they made you hum contentedly as you floated towards calm unconsciousness.
“I love you too.”
