summary: Dan’s boyfriend breaks up with him, and Phil does his very best to get Dan to realize they’re perfect for each other. Unfortunately, Dan’s oblivious and his dog, Colin, is out to ruin Phil’s plans.
word count: 2200
warnings: slight angst in the beginning, heavy kissing, slight presmut, i swear like a sailor
prompt: “something where dnp are best friends when they are younger (maybe high school age) and dan has a dog that phil doesn't like but eventually warms up to as he falls in love with dan or something lame like that”
Listen to the playlist here
Phil loves his best friend Dan - honestly, he does.
They’ve been friends since primary school - so basically as long as Phil can remember. Dan is smart and talented and hilarious, always there to help Phil with his calculus homework (despite being younger than him), sing High School Musical with him (despite the fact that Phil can’t sing) and be player two in Crash Bandicoot. Basically, Dan is the best friend ever.
Except for one thing. Dan’s dog Colin.
Ever since Dan’s family had brought home Colin - Dan had showed Phil over Skype - the dog has had it out for him. Among various transgressions, the dog has literally eaten Phil’s homework (imagine explaining that to your teacher), pissed on his drama script (again, a fun explanation), and has eaten half of Phil’s very expensive sandwich.
And then there’s the fact that Phil cannot get within five feet of the thing without having a sneezing fit. On top of everything Colin has done to him, Phil’s allergic. Which is a blast.
He often has to take Benadryl just to be in Dan’s house. Which is why he’s in Tesco’s after school when he should be at home or at Dan’s - pretending to do his homework while he plays video games instead.
His phone chimes in his back pocket with a text, but he ignores it as he looks over the labels. He’s considering getting extra strength Benadryl in case Colin attacks him when his phone chimes again. And again. And then it rings.
He answers without looking. “Holy shit, what do you want?”
“Phil?” It’s Dan’s voice, but softer, shakier sounding. Phil’s been friends with Dan for long enough to know what he sounds like on the verge of tears, and his heart instantly breaks into a million different pieces.
“Dan,” he says softly. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. What’s wrong?”
“It’s-” Dan gives a little sob and Phil picks up the Benadryl, walks onto the queue where he’s behind an elderly woman with two full baskets, good lord. “It’s Chris.”
Chris, as in Dan’s boyfriend. Phil knew Chris was no good for him, but he had never interfered before because Dan seemed so happy. Now, he feels miserable. “Oh god,” Phil says. He looks at the old lady in front of him, who seems to be moving so slowly that Phil wonders if he entered the fucking Matrix, and then back down at the box of Benadryl.
He sighs. “I’m coming to you, okay? Stay there.” He hangs up the phone and puts the box down, then books it out of Tesco’s as fast as he can without looking suspicious.
He drives to Dan’s house perhaps a little faster than legal. Luckily, he doesn’t get pulled over before he pulls up to Dan’s house. He gets out of his car and barely even knocks at the front door before Dan answers - drowning in a hoodie, his face red with tears.
Phil pulls him into a hug. “Hey,” he says into Dan’s hair. “Let’s get you inside.”
They somehow manage to stumble inside and Phil closes the door behind them. Dan leads Phil wordlessly to the kitchen and doesn’t sit in a chair - instead slides to the floor with his head in his hands. Phil doesn’t even think about the possibility of Colin coming to attack him, he just sits next to Dan and wraps an arm around him.
“What happened?” Phil asks after a long silence.
Dan sniffles. “H-he said that he could do better than me.” His voice barely shakes on the words but he sounds so defeated - almost like he believes the asshole. Phil has never wanted to go to someone’s house and punch them in the face more. “I’ll never be good enough for anyone.”
That’s enough to get Phil out of his head. “Hey, that’s not true,” he says softly. He wipes the tears from Dan’s eyes with the back of his thumb. “You’re amazing, Dan. Any guy that can’t see that is an asshole.”
In a moment akin to a romcom, Dan looks up at Phil through his tears. Phil pushes a piece of Dan’s hair back so he can look Dan in the eyes. The two of them stare at each other for a second and Phil can’t believe he’s never noticed how beautiful Dan’s eyes are. He gets a hand under Dan’s chin and the two of them lean in.
At that exact moment, Colin decides to jump on Dan and knock him away from Phil. Dan laughs and Phil would be mad at Colin if Dan’s laugh hadn’t made him so happy.
Phil stands up quickly and clears his throat. Dan looks up at him from where he’s sitting on the floor playing with Colin. “I-” Phil clears his throat, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. “I’m going to get Starbucks. Do you want anything?”
“Yeah,” Dan says. “You know what I like.” That sentence leaves a stunning realization in Phil’s chest. How could he have never noticed just how perfect they were for each other before?
“Of course,” he says instead, and quickly makes his way out of Dan’s house.
Dan and Phil have been best friends for as long as Phil can remember. Phil can’t remember ever having romantic feelings for his best friend. Sure, they have a much more physical relationship than male friends usually do, but he had always chalked that up to the two of them being more fluid in their sexuality than typical friends.
Still, all the hugs and cheek kisses, cuddling and late night movie sessions, Phil can’t help but think those would be so much better if he could lean over and pull Dan into a kiss.
Phil comes back with the two cups of coffee and a firm resolution to tell Dan how he feels. However, that plan goes out the window as soon as he walks in. Dan is asleep on the couch, cuddling with Colin. It’s cute, sure, but Phil can’t help but sigh a little in disappointment.
He swears, Colin gives him a smug look.
It seems after that, Colin is out to sabotage his relationship with Dan before it even begins.
Phil stops by a florist after school to buy flowers for Dan. He’s personally never understood the appeal, but they make Dan smile and that’s what he’s going for. He knows that Dan’s commute home is a little longer than his as Dan takes the bus, so Phil sits in Dan’s living room with the flowers and waits.
Unfortunately, he forgets that he’s put the flowers down, and it isn’t until Colin returns with a rose stem that Phil realizes that the flowers have been torn apart.
The next time Phil tries to impress Dan, he writes him a poem in drama. To be fair, he’s not the world’s best writer, but it’s from his heart and Phil hopes that’s all that matters. He’s been sitting in Dan’s room for a while, the both of them listening to music and working separately on different homework assignments, when Phil remembers the poem.
“I’ll be right back, I wanna show you something,” he says, and if Dan notices the way his heart is beating out of his skin, he doesn’t say anything. Phil walks to the corridor where he left his bookbag leaning against Colin. He goes to pick it up and Colin latches onto the handle. When Phil tries to grab it from him, all the papers spill.
Colin then proceeds to stand over the pile and piss.
“Hey, what’s taking so-” Dan stops from where he’s moved to the doorway and gasps. “Oh, bad doggie!” He says. He shoos Colin away and grabs some paper towels. He’s cleaning the mess when he looks up at Phil and says, “I’m so sorry. I hope there was nothing important.”
Phil breaks out of his stunned silence and leans down to help Dan pick up the piss-soaked papers. Gross. “It’s fine,” he lies.
When the mess is done and they both wash their hands, Dan turns to Phil. “So,” he says. “What did you wanna show me?”
Phil sighs. “It’s nothing,” he answers.
At that point, Phil decides to throw all of his plans out the window. They’re stupid anyway. He decides he’s just going to be direct - wait until a moment when Dan’s eye catches his and they’re staring at each other and Phil can get a hand on Dan’s cheek and pull him into a beautiful first kiss.
Dan will fall for him for sure.
The first perfect moment, they’re watching a movie. Phil makes a joke and Dan laughs. He turns to Phil, and his eyes are shining in the gentle moonlight streaming through the window. Phil actually feels his heart catch in his throat and he swears Dan moves in closer. He brings a shaking hand to move Dan’s hair out of his face and gets a hand under his chin. His heart is pounding hard as he moves in and-
Colin jumps in between them. Dan lets out an awkward little laugh and pets Colin’s head. He throws Phil an apologetic look and turns back to the movie as if nothing ever happened.
Phil’s not sure if Dan’s completely clueless or just fucking with him at this point, honestly.
The next perfect moment, they’re eating dinner on the floor like responsible, mature people with a table. Dan tells Phil he’s got an eyelash on his cheek and Phil asks him to get it. With the gentle back of his thumb, Dan gets the eyelash from Phil’s cheek and offers the thumb to Phil. “Blow it away, make a wish,” Dan says under his breath.
Phil takes Dan’s outstretched hand and moves in closer, closes his eyes and wishes for at least a shot with Dan. He blows it away and opens his eyes again, and finds Dan’s eyes transfixed on his lips. He decides that’s as sure of a sign as any from the gods that he should go for it. He moves in close, almost connects their lips.
And Colin jumps on Dan, knocks him out of the way like a sports play. And that’s the exact moment when Phil decides he’s done fucking around with Colin.
Phil waits a few days before he goes over Dan’s again. He takes a deep breath before he walks in - he doesn’t need to knock - and makes a beeline for Dan.
“Dan,” he starts. His best friend looks up, vaguely startled by Phil’s resolute expression. He’s got books spread out in front of him - clearly working on some sort of project for school. “I need to talk to you about something.”
“Okay,” Dan says slowly. He takes his earbud out of his ear and places it on the table. “I’m all yours.”
Phil takes a deep breath. “I-” Then he spots Colin sitting around the corner, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. He looks between Dan and the dog and says, “excuse me.”
With sheer willpower, he manages to get Colin into Dan’s room and he locks the door. Pleased with himself, he returns to the kitchen and sits across from Dan. “Dan, I-”
They’re both startled by the sound of Colin barking. Dan laughs a little bit and stands. “I should let him out,” he reasons.
Phil almost watches him go, really, he does. But then he decides ‘fuck it’, because it’s now or never, and he drags Dan into his lap and kisses him.
Dan doesn’t respond for a second, which scares Phil, but then he’s kissing back with the force of a man who’s been denied something for way too long. He gets a hand into Phil’s hair and sinks into Phil’s lap. Phil wraps an arm around Dan’s waist and pulls him in closer. Dan makes a little noise in the back of his throat that Phil wants a fucking audio recording of - honestly.
Phil picks Dan up - quite a feat considering they’re the same height - and stands. He gets a hand under Dan’s ass to support him but doesn’t break the kiss. Dan’s arms move to around Phil’s neck so at least it’s easier to stay still as they kiss. Phil walks them to Dan’s bedroom slowly and kicks the door open with his foot.
Of course, Colin attacks almost as soon as the door is open. He jumps on them, and Phil is so startled that he falls backwards with Dan on top of him. Dan rolls off in shock, and Colin immediately takes his place, licking Phil’s face and clawing at his chest.
Dan starts laughing - Phil supposes it is funny, in hindsight - as Phil tries to wrestle the dog off of him. “Colin-” Dan wheezes through laughter, his cheeks red and his eyes watering. “Colin, Colin, bad. Leave-” he’s laughing too hard to continue.
Phil immediately manages to get Colin off of him and sits up. And, as he watches his best friend laugh, he finds he doesn’t really care that Colin interrupted them this time.
Even as his allergies kick in.
AUTHOR’S NOTE
so maddi is the first place winner of my fanfic giveaway! it finished at the end of june and i’m just now getting around to writing this fic i know i’m a horrible human being i had school lmao
it really was so fun working with them! they’re so nice and their blog is so beautiful, i definitely recommend checking them out and giving them a little follow!
i asked them for their music taste and they said they wanted feel good pop songs, which i hope i delivered. check out the playlist, it was super fun to put together and i binged it while writing this.
if you liked this please, please consider giving it a reblog. those help the blog to grow and give me motivation to actually write instead of binging netflix lmao.
check out the rest of my writing here.
thank you i love you
-hunt <3
p.s. i’m sorry this took so long pls don’t hate me bye
