#double meh

[the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond]

Feelings a little bit down right meow...

Hime getting better, but not full recovery and my vet said That the chance for the "second option" is very high now. So if it s That, there is nothing to be done. *sigh*

And I very frustrating because sometimes I could be very shy and I don t... Achieve to get close to the People That I wish to be more closer. A aaaw we all can be so bad with our link with other People fjzbdvvs ! X)

Still a meh body That I always Wonder where is my energyyyy ?... Can it be possible to didn t have pain for one minute ? :v

And That hurts me so bad, nearly one month and still hadn t be able to draw Theron again. I don t know if I will go beyond That. I don't think so, I m so stuck to this. It s like you love hot chocolate, it was one thing to bring you smile instantly but you have became intolerant to Milk and you can not drink it anymore (my life since 4years XD).

But I still be able to see some positive things, like in less one month I will see again Orphaned Land, some supportative friend but the ratio meh/yeay lean on more on the meh side. It s like the snake feeding on his own tails...

[the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond]

Okay, I don t like complain but that's totally what I will doing.

I m on "vacation" in my parent's house since two days because I need some medical assist and living alone is complicated for now because of that. Even if my cats are happy here because they is a garden and and a lot of fun there, the little fluffy one (Hime) had pain with her articulation and it broke my heart.

But the worst part is that my parents are always arguing, ans try to use me to choose a side for everything and everytime. :v And of course, because I m not trolling too much, there is no internet here (well, normandy's internet so that s the same) and I cannot go outside. ~ I also don t have my material so I cannot sewing for killing time... *facepalm*

This month will be even more longer and complicated that I was thinking ! XD

One positive thing: a friend send me a bouquet of roses. (okay it s a mess too because he send me on my appartement and I wasn t here ! X) Poor guy...)

At least I will focus on drawing when my health allow me to do it. :v

[miezermiezmiez]

Woke up at 5:30 am, read some fanfic, and somehow managed to fall asleep again. Now I'm awake again and wonder why I didn't get up at 5:30, because now I sure as hell don't want to.

[vied-amour]

I’m going to watch City of Bones because I am actually that bored

[theredhairing40]

11 Hours and 37 mins later

Apparently I need to look at my ratings for films on the message board carefully.

The idea of going 1 out 10 with a rating such as an example of:

Paprika 9.8/10

Or 

Plan Nine from Outerspace 2.7/10

I just need to be objective enough... without changing the rating at the last minute.

Sigh.... I learned my lesson.

I hope :(

[zombiedisco5150]

I find it both weird and challenging to talk to folks. Even people I know on here personally (well I kinda know 1 person) I find it hard to say something as simple as  "hey, how's your day going?" ... I dunno, I've spent pretty much of the last 30 or so minutes trying to think of something to say without sounding like a complete tool.

This is why I find it terrifying interacting with anyone (whether it is on here or out there)  'cos I'm always continuously wondering what the other persons response will be.....

[zombiedisco5150]

If I could just get that confirmation I can be done with this shit. I can't be an adult I don't know how to be. It's like Billy West jokingly said "growing old isn't for pussies" and honestly if I'm to do this by myself...I might as well get it over with....

I just-just can't stomach being lonely anymore. I don't want to be alone

[zombiedisco5150]

So it would seem that today I'm in the business of blowing up bridges, and business is good...... fuck seriously I don't think I've lost so many friends in the space of 2 hours ever...