#dra 222

[shakespeareanthoughts]

Ranking of Hamlet Characters

Horatio: what a guy, 10/10 fulfills bff role

Laertes: just lookin’ out for his sister, decent guy just does not know what the hell is going on

Polonius: tries his best, does not get treated too well by Hamlet

Rozencrantz and Guildenstern: neutral neutral

Hamlet: snappy burns, has some issues he needs to work out

Gertrude: also does not know what’s going on, doesn’t think too much before she acts

Ophelia: don’t even get me started

Claudius: wtf dude not cool don’t kill your brother and marry his widow

I have concluded I am indifferent to 97% of these characters and this is a terrible ranking

[shakespeareanthoughts]

To be, or not to be: that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them. To die, to sleep-- No more--and by a sleep to say we end The heartache, and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to! 'Tis a consummation Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep-- To sleep--perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub, For in that sleep of death what dreams may come When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, Must give us pause.

Hamlet, Hamlet (3.1.56-68)

[shakespeareanthoughts]

Take you me for a sponge, my lord?

Rosencrantz, Hamlet (4.2.14)

[shakespeareanthoughts]

Ranking of A Midsummer Night’s Dream Characters

The Mechanicals: pretty swell guys, would definitely want to be friends with them

Hermia: just wants to marry the guy she loves

Lysander: just wants to marry the girl he loves, whole “loving Helena” is not his fault

Helena: bit of an inferiority complex, endearing and just wants to be loved

Hippolyta: kind of just there, seems like a nice lady

Theseus: a bit too concerned with his wedding vs the possibility of a girl dying, was in a bit of a tight spot and did his best to get around it

The Fairies: just following orders, not much personality there

Titania: just wants to have her changeling boy (which I do not condone and therefore she is lower on the list than need be but you gotta admit there are a lot of reasonable and not terrible characters in this play)

Philostrate: has a pretty good speech about all the possible performances

Demetrius: he’s a prick

Puck: kind of creepy

Nick Bottom: obnoxious, overbearing, and loud

Oberon: what is your deal man you just left the potion in Demetrius’ eyes without his consent, also not a great “person” in general

Egeus: terrible father, not the worst in Shakespeare’s cannon but he’s up there, why would you want your daughter to die???

[shakespeareanthoughts]

If we shadows have offended, Think but this, and all is mended: That you have but slumb'red here, While these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, No more yielding but a dream, Gentles, do not reprehend: If you pardon, we will mend. And, as I am an honest Puck, If we have unearnèd luck Now to scape the serpent's tongue, We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call: So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends.

Puck, A Midsummer Night’s Dream (5.1.425-440)

[shakespeareanthoughts]

Madness in great ones must not unwatched go.

Claudius, Hamlet (3.1.191)

[shakespeareanthoughts]

Now cracks a noble heart. Good night, sweet Prince

Horatio, Hamlet (5.2.359-360)

[shakespeareanthoughts]

There's never a villain dwelling in all Denmark But he's an arrant knave.

Hamlet, Hamlet (1.5.123-124)