Jan 1, 2018
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! FUCK YOU 2017 AND WELCOME 2018!
And some advise for you all. Forgot to make resolutions? Just write out everything you’re doing or planning to do tonight and at the beginning add the word “stop” before it.
seen from Italy
seen from Russia
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from United States
seen from India
seen from Guyana
seen from Russia
seen from Russia
seen from China
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Colombia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! FUCK YOU 2017 AND WELCOME 2018!
And some advise for you all. Forgot to make resolutions? Just write out everything you’re doing or planning to do tonight and at the beginning add the word “stop” before it.
God Bless Australia
Alex's comment "Your breath smells of paint stripper. What have you had to drink?!"
My poor long-suffering fiancee everyone. I need to give him a hug!
Huuuuge shout out to my wonderful Husband @turva-auto for putting up with me for Eurovision! Love you Eric!!!!!!
Ah, as always it’s time for the official hazycosmicchild Eurovision score card from last night! pints are out of 10. And as always you can pinpoint the moment the alcohol kicked in.
1. Ukraine - 6 points for the piano catching fire! 2. Spain - 2 points because I was bored during it. 3. Slovenia - 6 points. I took points off for the stupid fake music stop. 4. Lithuania - 0 points for another boring song. Bring on the strippers and glitter! 5. Austria - 4 points. Not the best song ever but not the worst. 6. Estonia - 5 points. Her high pitched singing scared my bunny rabbit! 7. Norway - 9 points! And Eurvision royalty has graced us again! 8. Portugal - 2 points. You’re not allowed to win two years in a row! 9. UK - 10 POINTS BECAUSE IT US AND WE GOT STAGE INVADED!!! 10. Serbia - 6 points. They have a crazy scientist playing the recorder! 11. Germany - 4 points. I hate Ed Sheeran wannabies! 12. Albania - 5 points. The screeching scared me a bit in it. 13. France- 5 points. I’m too drunk right now to translate the French in this. 14. Czech Republic - 6 points. I think that kid has to go to school after this. 15. Denmark - 10 points. I would let those Vikings do bad bad things to me. 16. Australia - 10 points. An Aussie accent is like a bat signal for my vagina. 17. Finland - 6 points. I’m just pissed it’s not Kimi Raikkonen on stage singing! 18. Bulgaria - 4 points. This is just a little crap. I expected better from Euro Sia. 19. Moldova - 8 points. That staging is so Eurovision! 20. Sweden - 8 points. I’m getting “sex you up.” vibes. Different song though! 21. Hungary - 10 points. This is a standard Saturday night for me! 22. Israel - 6 points because I'm distracted by the lucky cats in the background! 23. The Netherlands- 10 MY DUTCH BRETHERINE ARE PLAYING!!!!!! 24. Ireland- 2 points. Still not forgiving you for making me suffer Jedward. 25. Cyprus - 2 points. She’s a knock off Beyonce! I am not feeling it! 26. Italy - 10 POINTS MY ITALIAN COUSINS!!!
Ah the morning after Eurovision. Better known as check all my social media accounts to see what drunk me has been posting.
I demand to represent the UK at Eutovision next year! (And yes I’m hella drunk!)
Ah Eurovision. The only time I acknowledge my Anglo-Dutch-Italian heritage in the hopes one of my nations will win!