#dumb dick

[half-eaten-deodorant]

Dumb D!ck

[riftenriffraff]

"You are a clotpole." (Idek what that is but I'm assuming it's rude xD)

[Prompt]

“You would be the expert, wouldn’t you?”

[shibajoo]

alright im gonna check out my new followers' blogs

[misfit-perfection]

Lmfao my mom is considering therapy.

[vandalizeme]

I really just want to love someone with 100% of my heart again. 

[feofool]

Yeah fuck me for being soooo mean while yourrr boy only likes shit that other people like. Im so hardcore but now I have to recite rap lyrics.

[garethsbale]

You and the stranger both like fc barcelona.

Stranger: hi

You: hey

You: u like barca?

Stranger: yep

You: whos your fav player

Stranger: all of them

Stranger: yours?

You: whole real madrid team man

You: hala madrid

Stranger: suck cristiano's dick

You: suck messi's non existence dick

Stranger: whoa cristiano is the girl he probably has a vagaina

You: wow you're so creative man

You: he is together with irina shayk she's flawless

Stranger: she's only with him for his money

You: no they love each other irina loves cristiano jr dont you see it man are you blind

Stranger: he doesn't want people to know that he's a woman

You: you're laughing at him he laughs at your bank account

You: you're just jelly

You: he has everything you want

Stranger: i have a perfect life

You: you dont lol

You: cristiano's is much better trust me

Stranger: yes with putting on lipstick

You: he hasnt lipstick man

You: at least he isnt ugly as99% of barca

Stranger: IT'S FOOTBALL

Stranger: who the fuck cares about how they look like

You: IKR! HE IS THE BEST

Stranger: it's not a model contest

You: you just said that cristiano puts on lipstick

You: but he doesnt

You: and he's the best in footie

You: his skills are flawless

Stranger: FORCA BARCA bye

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[boobsandbravado]

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This is how I'm feeling at 2:56am. Judge me, if you must.