Nights like this just make me question my very existence. Who am I? What am I supposed to do in this world? Why am I feeling so disconnected with the world? How am I supposed to live my life? Where am I going?

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Nights like this just make me question my very existence. Who am I? What am I supposed to do in this world? Why am I feeling so disconnected with the world? How am I supposed to live my life? Where am I going?
This week has been really rough for me. Personal ranting about my health and the US health system under the break.
My first day home, Saturday, went okay until the evening when my period started... a week early. Besides being early, not fun, it’s been extremely heavy and has really exhausted me.
I had a doctor’s appointment Monday to figure out what to do since my old treatment plan isn’t going to work for the long term. We decided to at least temporarily try a lower dose birth control while running some blood tests and an ultrasound to check for anything new (cysts, thyroid disease, etc.)
So when I got home I dropped off my prescription at the pharmacy to be filled. I figured it wouldn’t be super expensive. It was a relatively common drug. Then I got a call with the co-pay... $200.
We finally did some finagling and got it down to $75 for a one month supply (the $200 was for a three month supply, and in the past I haven’t done well with birth control pills due to reactions with synthetic estrogen.) I asked my dad, a veterinarian with experience with pharmaceuticals, why the hell a fairly basic birth control pill costs so much. Apparently the given excuse is “research and development”.
Fuck you.
I understand that some research needs to go into these drugs to make them better and stuff. I understand that it costs money. But I don’t think it costs you the exorbitant amount you charged me.
In fact, fuck you for charging so much for a drug that’s currently my only hope of finishing up the semester.
Also, fuck the patriarchy for not researching gynecological issues more. You’d think we would’ve come up with solutions better than IUDs, birth control pills (which isn’t specifically designed for gynecological health issues because... you know... the name), and NSAIDs in the past thirty years.
DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE TOLD ME TO TAKE NSAIDS FOR THIS?!?! DO YOU?!?! I AM WELL AWARE IBUPROPHEN IS A THING THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!!
Just fuck.
Midol
I really don't know what am I going to do without this medicine every time I'm on my period. A numbing pain from my belly woke me up yesterday, and since my period just started the night before, I immediately knew it was dysmennorhea. So I quickly eat a light breakfast for me to be able to take the medicine. And after a few minutes, I was relieved from the pain.
Midol was introduced to me by a friend from college, and since then, I have always relied on this medication every time I experience menstrual cramps. Unlike other pain-relievers, this medicine targeted pain due to menstruation. Though the old hot compress is still dependable, I would still suggest Midol for women who want a fast-acting solution and who do not want to be disrupted by dysmennorhea.
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