#eden:task

[theedenproject-rp-blog]

punishment time

Due to the fact many of you haven’t done the previous task, it is time to announce the punishment. For the next week, each of you will be a slave to those who have done the task and must do everything they say. If you fail to do what is told, the week will extend. Those that are paired up must also live together for the week. Here is the list below:

Slave -> Master

Rosalie -> Bentley

Sienna -> Adelaide

Tara -> Arielle

Callie -> Everett

Hallie -> Elliot

Hadley -> Van

Alex -> Nellie

Jase -> Kristalena

Meg -> Hope

Cole -> Victoria

Andrew -> Jaymee

Aaron -> Arya

Dontae -> Willa

Miles -> Genevieve

Marcel -> Mikayla

Taka -> Rylie

Drew -> Freya

like this post if you have read it

[jaymeepsullivan-blog]

                                jaymee sullivan | beast inside

I didn’t use to fear anything. I used to be the one that others feared. But now fear has taken over. I wake up every day afraid that I made the wrong choice when I gave up my son for adoption. I know in my head that he’ll have a better life with a family that can take care of him in a way I couldn’t on my own. I’m afraid that he’ll grow up hating me, the mother that gave him up. Or possibly worse, that he will never know I exist. I’m also afraid that I’ll never get to be happy--truly happy--again. It feels selfish to be happy. And what if I have another child one day? I’m afraid of everything.

[eve-rett-blog]

                              everett ericson | beast inside

So, we’re supposed to write about our fears? I think since I first arrived here my fears have changed. Or maybe it’s more so that my goals have changed and my fear is simply failing. When I first arrived here, I feared failing my parents and their memory. I wanted to be the best, the smartest, and the one to finish what they started. I wanted to change the world. Until she changed me. I still want to honor my parents, but since I’ve gotten to know Willa, I’ve started to understand that science will always exist and technology will continue to advance, but the people in our lives are only with us for a limited amount of time and we have to make the most of it. When Willa got hurt, it was terrible, but it help me put things in perspective. And I’m afraid of anything like that happening to her again. 

[bentleybeau-blog]

                          bentley beaumont | beast inside

I can’t say I’ve been excited about this. I like reading, but writing about my inner demons? It’s not really something I wanted to do. Even writing a song would be much different than a journal like this. I try to stay positive and optimistic. I try to tell myself that the darkness is behind me now and no one can hurt me again. But I guess when I try to self-examine my fears, I worry that it’s really not over. I worry that I’ll lose more of my family. I worry that I’ll lose Adelaide like I lost my parents. I don’t know if I could take it if someone kidnapped her like they did to my mom. The searching, the heartache, and then all the lost time I missed when I was held captive there myself. I can’t imagine going through all that again. I honestly don’t know if I’m strong enough to take it. 

That’s my deepest fear. 

[elliot--sinclair-blog]

                                     elliot sinclair | beast inside

It’s a bit ironic that I sit here writing a journal about my fears when one of my fears just came true. I’m not “afraid” per say of Drew, but I suppose I’m still haunted by the life he reminds me of. I didn’t think I was. I thought I was past that. I thought that if I just had courage and remained kind that it would get me through and I wouldn’t have to worry about them anymore now that I’m not trapped there anymore. But now, I can’t stop hearing his voice in my head. 

                      “ You don’t deserve to have love in your life. ” 

                                             “ Everyone you love always dies. ” 

And now, Hope isn’t talking to me. What if he was right? Is it best to just let her go now so nothing bad happens to her? Am I just meant to be alone? I don't want to leave her. But now it seems selfish not to... 

[adelaidebea]

Suicidal... Relapse - Task | | Beast Inside

I’m not one to express my feelings, not unless it’s in song. But I guess this is new for me. I don’t write diaries or journals, I honestly find it harder than writing a song. Everyone knows me as a beast. I came here being a total monster and shutting everyone out. I was too afraid that I would end up losing someone else I would care about or more so.. That I would hurt them. But here I am, with an amazing boyfriend and friends. Crazy right? I don’t believe it either. My attitude has changed, shockingly, but that doesn’t mean I’m a whole different person. In fact, I think of myself as one with even more secrets. I may seem happier in front of people, but honestly, I feel even more sad than ever.

I’m afraid that people will find out that I take therapy for my anger. I mean only very little know, but I’m afraid everyone else will find out how much of a fucked up person I am that I have to take therapy to figure my shit out. I’m afraid Bentley will find out how afraid I am. I’m scared he will find out that I’m afraid to relapse. I still want to kill myself, I still want to harm myself, more now than ever. I can’t let him know that. I’m afraid if we ever break up that I would stop everything and become the monster I already am. I am a monster and I can never let Bentley know that I still want to kill myself. I’m afraid that my inner monster will come out to play again. I just can’t let it happen. I want to change, but I'm afraid I'm already too deep.

[theedenproject-rp-blog]

Jobs & Tasks

Everyone’s jobs this week will be to clean the room of a certain couple in Eden.

Maxine Gobin - Jaymee & Van

Hope Holland - Adelaide & Bentley

Rylie Flinn - Kristalena & Andrew

Mikayla Wazowski - Alex & Arielle

Cole Naley - Sienna & Meg

Aaron Cruise - Genie & Jase

Tara Grant - Nellie & Dontae

The tasks this week is for each castoff to choose one person on the island who they truly trust, or believe they could one day possibly trust, and tell them something personal about you that they would be surprised to find out. 

Tag this post eden:task.