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so serious when i say that was the most academically difficult and jargony thing i have seen in my life. when i read legalese my eyes glaze over but with pedagogy talk its worse because i speak the language now so it makes me feel gross. but like all things challenging, towards the end i started to get excited and proud of myself in an awesome perverted way. if i could suck myself off for the feat i just accomplished i would

#edenpost #just had a euphoria of leaning back seeing the rest of myselves and realizing i had been very alone scared and stressed for the past days #amazing that we only had another dissociative split once in this past month. tbh

the school im still placed at until the end of the semester is going to for some reason starting next week make students have to mark their bathroom trips with some schoolwide system in their chromebooks (which not all of them remember to bring) (which die quickly by 5th period) and is limiting them to 2 per day but the admin is like "oh dont worry teachers just do your usual routines as normal" meanwhile i just know we are going to be the ones fielding complaints and having class interrupted and i know im going to just be saying i dont care just sign out take the pass and go because oh my god idc if a few people are irresponsible with it i actually think its evil to expect me to tell people they can only piss twice a day if they arent speedy in the 5 minute passing period when it takes 5 minutes to walk across campus. and god forbid a 13 year old has ibs flareups or some shit. and i feel like im the only one who thinks this is evil

#sooo many students come into class early n go i need to go but theres not enough time left #im like baby just take the pass and go i wont mark you late idc idc idc #btw another thing is if a student is late they have to go to the office so the system marks them late #the art room is right by the office but in most other classrooms this takes like 6 minutes to go there and back #so its like whats the POINT #the point isnt to streamline instruction its literally to control #and the best teachers ive met at this school have hated all of this and just made up their own class policies #edenpost #id just rather have students be comfortable and not afraid and in class i know thats a fucking novel concept

feeling something embarrassing. kill me

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my seating chart pushed a student to be friends with two people i thought they would get along with and its workingggg its working they came into class the other day all 3 of them holding hands. its adorable.

#I DID THAT they did that but it was my MACHINATIONS #edenpost

havent been posting selfies because i often feel like i really can just never look like myself. always drawing self portraits in an endless egotistical effort to communicate whatever is going on and always getting it wrong anyway. still gonna draw myself too often tho

#actually i hate posting my face who is that LOL #edenpost #just needed to say hiii to the mutuals

always trying to decide if im crazy or uptight or whatever just the way people talk about sex is so odd and offputting and simplifying (and also personally triggering to me for various reasons) specifically topping/bottoming i hate the internet

#my evilposting MY EVILPOSTING #edenpost #'everyone who isnt cishet realized bottoming is more fun' WHAT DOES THAT MEAAAAN #FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF EVERYONE SHOULD BE HAVING FUN!!!!#i feel like i cant even be like oh i do like bottoming without the reception being like oh of course because youre a short tboy #and i cant even claim to like topping without needing to show my resume or some shit and nobody would believe me #and then its also like ok well wheres the line and whats the point #and i keep seeing the take that switches are bottoms who are lying #maybe sex is like a collaborative effort that people involved should be involved in to the level they want and that can changr #change* and maybe hard labels dont fucking fit when trans ppl also #have a lot!!! of hangups and nerves and fear about their bodies!!!! and a lot of us struggle to feel attractive!!!#maybe instead of all this bullshit we can focus on making each other feel hot and good OK OK OK OK OK THANKS #absolutely pointless ramble but i needed it bless xoxo #SORRY NOOO ITS LIKE. the implication that topping is a chore and inherently less fun and the short end of the stick is so frustrating #im saying all this as a puppyboy who wants to be dragged around on a leash ok i contain multitudes #i think its literally just that online gays are insecure and want guidance / someone else to lead which is literally like. yeah! ok! fine!#whats the point of generalizing though 😊😊😊 i feel violent

"evil alters" not a thing except for the 14 year old who doesnt like speaking directly to anyone but makes me emotionally withholding and angry all the time

#i know its got a lot of shit i love the freak WHATEVER. but omg we are too close rn i want to be able to be kind again #edenpost

get weirder

yes

masturbatory repressive shame spiral for the rest of your life

Voting ended onApr 5, 2025

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