#eeeeehhhhhh

[theelderhazelnut]

What if I go to sleep a little bit earlier tonight? Will I have the enrgy I want for tomorrow? Who knows…

[thats-how-you-eurovision]

Time for my opinion that no one asked for re: the American song contest!!!! Because I live in America unfortunately so I feel I can give an opinion on this

As an american.... I don't wanna get my hopes up tbh I've got a feeling it's going to be like every other singing competition show we have already, none of which i care for, and it's just going to be however many hours of people trying too hard

Like.... Idk it probably gonna be more over-produced nonsense?? Like what most music TV stuff is over here?

Not that other countries don't also overproduction their music shows/competitions but it just feels especially pervasive in American media (maybe bc I've been exposed to it for so long just by living here but it feels like it's everywhere)

I'll likely still watch it but I'm going to try and remain neutral about it till it airs. I want to be hopeful but I also want to be cautious in case it ends up being a raging dumpster fire

[minuitdanslalune]

[aparticularbandit]

Mental Health Challenge - Day 29: Indulge

she’d never been one for indulgences of any type.  after they’d left her father, money had been tight.  they’d moved far enough away so that he couldn’t find them, in a big enough city that even if he pinpointed their location they could easily escape into crowds – emma’d certainly gained her mind from her mother, not her sperm donor – but in spite of her mother’s paranoia, or perhaps because of it, they’d never really needed to worry about his return.

her mother had taken shady jobs in shady locations.  she’d never allowed emma to visit her, and the jobs themselves had never been exactly lucrative.  her employers had taken more than their fair share of her pay and only allowed them enough to scrape by.  even their little cottage wasn’t really their own, paid for by the people who kept her mother employed.  sometimes, when she was older, long after her mother was gone, she wondered if her mother had been in some sort of drug business, but just as often she thought it was rittenhouse invading her life years before she was of use to them.

maybe she’d done that herself.  time travel was an interesting thing.

but there were a lot of small things she missed as a result.  they rarely had enough money for special extras – starbucks was far out of their price range, ben & jerry’s, camping trips required more gas than they could afford.  she’d spent her summers indulging her mind instead of her body – experiments, mechanics, tearing things apart and putting them back together in much more effective manners.  kids at school talked about disneyland and new roller coasters and she heard it but ignored.  what was the point?  she would never go.  besides, she was more interested in seeing how the coasters worked than riding them anyway.

living in the frontier changed all that.

emma was best equipped for dealing with less.  they knew that when they sent her instead of any of a thousand other sleeper agents they could have sent.  she questioned them, not for leaving someone there but for leaving her.  a pilot.  sure, rufus, anthony, but the latter was not as deep as she was and rufus—

wouldn’t it be better to make sure they had a pilot fully committed to their cause?

maybe they questioned her even then.  of course they did.  rittenhouse questioned everyone who wasn’t born of their blood because somehow blood meant that they were allies upon birth even after moment of moment and instance of instance of failure and dispute.  rittenhouse lived and died by its allegiance to blood.

she would have fixed that.  allegiance only to those who were loyal to them.  no one else deserved it.  fuck blood.  she knew better than anyone that blood could betray you just as easily as it helped you.

indulge me she’d told flynn, he couldn’t be seen; his face was caught by cameras when he stole the mothership.  anthony couldn’t be seen either; he was supposed to be captured and if he was seen they’d know he wasn’t really captured.  even if they already knew that to some extent.

but she could leave their little hovel and experience the real world for the first time in at least a decade.  (she liked calling it a decade.  it had more weight that way.  ten years wasn’t near as heavy as a decade.  or maybe that was simply a carryover from the frontier.  they used words like that.  nowadays, she wasn’t sure people knew they existed.)

unlike the later nicholas, she was born in this time.  to her, this life wasn’t as indulgent as he thought it was.  it was a natural progression of having.  and when she was allowed to finally leave their little hovel – primarily as their grocery person because they realized she could – there was more than enough money for her to get whatever she wanted.

and while she never told them, she always came back with something she hadn’t been able to find in the frontier, something she hadn’t known to miss until it was gone. a good beer was one thing (and she didn’t drink often, given the alcoholism running in her father’s blood), but chocolate.  that she hid away so that flynn couldn’t give her a hard time on basis of her obvious womanhood.

she didn’t realize until later that he likely wouldn’t have cared.  he knew all too well what it meant to lose something and finally have it within grasp again.  but then, men like him were odd.  there should have been easier ways to save his family than to destroy rittenhouse, but, then, that was indulgent of him, wasn’t it?

[msmemaaaa]

I WANNA GO TO SHINHWA CONCERRRRRRRRRRRT 😡

[theoldandinactive]

When you’re mouthing “This Is the Moment” by the Jekyll & Hyde Musical, and you start to get really into it, and then realize your dad was watching you cause he woke up and you just immediately sink into your chair” 😅

[ao-xingyume1987]

"Coma"

[2pnyofinlands-gh]

Fuckin gr8 m8s

Stomach hurts, chest feels empty, lungs are feeling weird again, I feel like I’m about to throw up, I’m cold as shit, what tthe fuck-