Summary: You were an unusual young lad, the Avengers could all agree on that. You were undeniably a strong and bright young independent individual, but there was something you greatly lacked— confidence. It wasn’t that you didn’t feel your abilities and skills were good enough, you were among the best in combat. It was just… an aching feeling that remained for far too long, at the worst of times. So, you’ve had stress-relievers to help you along the way. One day you’re on another mission with Loki, and your anxiety strikes back, so you quickly began to do something to distress. Something, Loki didn’t expect someone would do in the midst of a mission.
Word Count: Roughly 1000-1500 words
A/n: It’s a bit rushed, I apologize. I tried to make it seem better but overall I think I messed up a bit in some parts. Thank you for taking the time to read.
Being an Avenger didn’t mean you had problems normal people had, sometimes they were on a much higher scale. And this time, it defiantly was.
You, were someone dependable in the Avengers, earning your spot for not only your wits but for your combat-style and technique. You weren’t very magical, either, you knew a few decent spells to help aid you psychically, but that was about it. Nothing fancy.
Everyone was grateful that you were apart of the team, but there was something they all had to help you with; something that had been bothering you for a while.
Your anxiety, and stress levels…
It wasn’t always bad, it wasn’t. There were plenty of times that were accompanied by great, treasurable memories that will forever remain between you all. You could be having the best day of your life…
But anything in the world could trigger it, unfortunately.
You’ve tried for years. When you revealed it to the Avengers Tony had attempted almost every fast, and easier ways to handle it.
Deep breathing exercises. Calming and soothing sounds. Essential oils. Positivity classes. Yoga. Focus sessions. Journaling/writing, poetry. Considerable well-known outlets to reduce stress (music, art, reading, etc.), but it seemed none had really helped. You had taken a personal liking to some, but none seemed overly helpful when your stress came daunting you.
Weirdly enough, food helped you. Water, food, sweets, had. It wasn’t necessarily healthy, you knew that, but the combination of food and your sessions of calming helped tremendously; the Avengers never questioned your random sessions, since it was just something they’d have grown accustomed to over the years. Everyone had their own problems in The Avengers, it was just the fact that yours was much more visible, especially throughout the rough years you’ve had.
But this. This was an entirely different story because it seemed nothing was working.
You were on a mission with the Avengers and assigned along with Loki to venture out and prevent a planned assassination, while the others would distract and handle the rest at hand.
However, in the midst of fighting and protecting the so-called man, you somehow managed to lose him. You and Loki had your hands tied around your backs fighting, and his dumbass ran off.
So of course, the first wave of anxiety and stress rushed through you, like an electric shock; sending signals to every nerve in your body to have a full-fledged panic. You were almost paralyzed, staring at the rocks and the distant sounds of battle, racking your brain for any type of way to not breakdown. Your fingers began to intertwine with one another, focusing on your breathing as Loki raged out loud with a series of curses.
“You’d think that if we were protecting the man, he’d be smart enough to stay put. No wonder they wanted to kill the man, he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, now is he? I can’t believe he’d--”
Loki turned to you after he noticed your stunned silence, and gaped.
“Oh dear, are you alright?” He questioned, watching you quizzically as you suddenly blinked, breath being knocked out of you suddenly. You stared up at Loki’s frame, gripping your hair.
“Where is he? I don’t know where he is? Why would he suddenly run off? What if he’s dead because I couldn’t get there in time? Why am I still here?” You began ranting, hands rotating/flailing around in circular motions as you tried to gain air, walking back and forth in the process.
“Wait, what’s going on? Are you okay?” He asked again, unaware that you were having a panic attack, mixed with a nervous breakdown (poor loki). Funny thing was, Loki didn’t know how to calm someone, nor did he know your situation currently (that, was pretty obvious though). His eyes tore away from your face as you dove into the light fanny-pack, wondering what you could contain in there that would help you. He stuttered over his words at the sight.
“Did… did you bring chocolate on this mission?!?” He asked, his voice louder than he intended it to be. You seemed to flinch at the sudden pitch, before turning your attention back to the
“It’s stress… chocolate,” you muttered, opening the package and proceeding to take nibble while Loki fumed.
“BUT WHY? AT A TIME LIKE THIS?!” Loki roared back, genuinely confused and astonished that you’d be thinking about eating at a time like this.
“ASSASSINATIONS STRESS ME OUT, OKAY?! WHETHER I’M PROTECTING OR THE VICTIM!” You barked at him, “AND IT DOESN’T HELP WHEN I’VE SCREWED UP. I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE I AM, NOR DO I KNOW WHERE HE IS...” You carried on, liquid just barely forming among the corners of your eyes.
Loki gulped uncomfortably, hands raising up wearily as he approached you. “I apologize, but I need you to calm down. It’s not all, entirely, your fault,” he spoke, hoping to gain a small laugh from you. Instead, a scoff was thrown his way.
“I can’t, that’s the problem.” You grumbled out, “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but nothing’s helped. One way or another, my stress gets the getter of me…”
“Take deep breaths.”
Your eyes widened as you stared at Loki, before curving down into an unsettling look. “I’ve done that already, it doesn’t work—“
“Just do it.” He growled, easily making you comply within a second. You closed your eyes, trying your best to relax your shoulders as you sharply inhaled through your nose. You stopped again and began to block the sounds of gunshots as you exhale through your parted lips.
“Keep doing it, ignore everything else around you, and focus on your breaths,” Loki instructed, as you nodded slowly, breathing again.
Out of nowhere, you felt a pair of cool, soothing hands brush against the temples of your head; your breath hitched.
“Relax, continue your breathing method.” You tried your best, continuing on for a bit more until you heard his voice again.
“I can help you, darling. But I’d have to help you with this problem mentally. And of course, I can’t do that without your permission… may I?”
You would be lying if you said you hadn’t thought of this as a trap or some type of joke. Maybe a chance for potential blackmail in the future? Loki, the God of Mischief, had asked permission to not only look inside your mind but help you?
“Sure,” you croaked out, hopeful that you wouldn’t regret your decision. Loki let out a small sigh before you felt his hands off your head again.
“Alright. Continue your breathing, and if you feel uncomfortable you can tell me to stop at any given moment.” He explained you nodded as you started again.
This time, his touch felt different. It was not only cool but strangely more gentle. Promptly, you felt heat. Golden, would be a strange way to put it, but exactly it.
Despite his cool fingers, it remained a soft, warm feeling. It felt addicting, exhilarating, in fact. Soon enough, he had drawn away, and you opened your eyes slowly.
Face-to-face with him, you stared into his tempting irises, before turning away. “Unfortunately it won’t be forever, it was a simple mind trick to help you a bit after the mission, I’m afraid. It will stop, and your stress will come back—“
You did it unexpectedly. Your arms wrapped around him, pure bliss igniting within you. “Thank you,” you whispered to him. “Thank you.” You spoke again.
And for the first time, you weren’t afraid. You weren’t scared.
