Don't let the white noise distract you . . . .
There are days when I am not sure what my topic will be and others when the passage practically writes itself. Today is the latter.
When I go to my gym I want it to be peaceful and serene. Yes I know I am there to tear it up on the steel but I don't want to be bothered and I certainly don't want confrontations with other gym members. I live in Los Angeles, there is enough bullish*t I have to deal with on a day-to-day basis that once I enter the sanctuary of the gym - where I go to better myself and elevate stress - I want it to be as hassle free as possible.
Most of us understand the etiquette of the gym scene or should . . . Don't walk in the space of someone actively working out, don't sit on a machine and play with your phone or otherwise take to much of a rest break, put the weights up when you are finished. One that I take very seriously is be friendly and don't take up a selfish amount of time on a machine or with a particular weight or dumbbell.
I do circuit training and in accordance with such training it is expected that you complete as many reps of 2-3 exercises in a given amount of time. Today I was getting ready to start my 2nd circuit of three. The movements were: dumbbell reverse lunge, dumbbell front shoulder raise and dumbbell flat chest press. I needed to do them in that order, 4-6 reps per movement and complete as many sets as possible in six minutes. I set up the circuit with 40lbs for reverse lunge, 35lbs for front shoulder raise and 70lbs for chest press.
This is where I make my point so pay attention . . . A man walks up and asks if I'm using all six dumbbells placed around me. I state I am doing a circuit and will be done with the weights after a 6 minute on, 6 minute off, 6 minute on pattern totaling 18 minutes in duration. He is not happy about this and announces his displeasure with the amount of dumbbells I want to take up for my workout. Calling me selfish, I retort with, "you're being rude," and after some similar banter back and forth where he calls me selfish and says I can't use all these weights at once and tells me I should at the very least give him one of the 35 or 40 pounders so he can do his exercise. I tell him that I need all these weights and will be done with them shortly . . 18 minutes might seem like a long time but if your not following a program, which I have much experience with, then usually you can move around the exercises you're planning to do based on availability of the weight or apparatus you need. There were duplicate weights about 30 feet away that were also being used at the time so he decided rather than wait he would make it a huge confrontation and hassle.
He goes and gets a gym employee and brings her in to interrupt my workout. By the time they both enter my space I am about three minutes in to the six minute circuit and my heart rate and intensity are perfectly harmonized to really get the most out of this circuit. The woman and man make me stop so he can again voice his displeasure with what I am doing. I tell her, like I told him, that I would be done in 18 minutes (in fact, if the set had continued unimpeded I would have been ready to move up in weight without losing my six rep goal I had set for myself before the circuit started. I was feeling great and would have been done with the 35's - at this point - in three minutes.)
He states he wants the 40's (though later I'd see him using the 35's across the gym) and that I am again being selfish. I do not hold my cool and say, "fine take them I'll lunge with 45s!" I toss the 40s aside as he NOW decides to walk away and leave me alone. I switch to the 45's and continue on. I am pissed off. I lost two minutes in my circuit, heart rate down and weights switched mid way through to appease a stranger whom couldn't understand that I was doing this circuit and would be done soon.
It's all I can do to not call him a bitch in public but I know better than to loose my cool. I know I'd have been tossed from the gym that very minute and perhaps subjugated to disciplinary action. But here, in this blog, I will call him a little cry baby bitch! Even now I am getting pissed of again about this dudes BS way of reacting to my workout procedure.
Wow . . so many words to express my displeasure. I did not expect this essay to go on so long. I'll leave that bitch, baby and BS part in the blog just to allow my true emotions to play out in this project Alpha of mine.
This man upset me so much I could barely concentrate on the rest of my workout. I did not eclipse the markers I was on pace for when they both approached me. The rest of the workout was beneficial but ultimately I was not able to let this incident out of my head. I had to write this blog about the experience just to leave it behind me. I am not a "drama" dude and will forget all about this by tomorrow's session and honestly, I couldn't point the guy out in a lineup and this just occurred two hours ago.
In conclusion: It seems the whole incident could have been passively resolved if the man would have been forthright with what weights he needed instead of going straight at me with "selfish" accusations. I could have asked what it was he needed and then deduced if it were possible to change what I was going to use to help him accomplish what it was I wanted which was to better myself and lift some steel.
Instead neither of us did that and frankly I didn't want to. I wanted to do what it was I had planned and be left the hell alone! I make concessions so often for people in this city. Every where I go there is someone in my damn way. People everywhere. It's the world we live in. Always someone in our way wanting what we want.
I will look back on this in a day or two and not be happy with myself. Not because I didn't help this man but because I pride myself on being the better person. I believe in KARMA and doing unto others as you would have them do to you. The funny thing . . . . as I was leaving the gym and walking though the parking garage to my car a senior couple drove in to the garage and as they were passing me stopped and asked if I worked there. I replied snidely, "do I look like I work here," then immediately said, "how can I help you?" They wanted to know where to park for the movie theater in the same complex as the gym. I gave them directions and told them to have a good time. I even showed them where the working elevators were located. I'm not sure if that makes karmic amends for my actions in the gym but it did allow me to feel helpful and kind to strangers.
Etiquette, common sense and common courtesy are not common in our world any longer and I do not wish to find myself a part of that negative movement. That being said, in the gym understand if someone gets to the equipment before you and it's not possible for you to work in without disrupting their synchronicity then move on or figure something else out that doesn't require a confrontation. I certainly have had to adapt during this Alpha program and surely I am not the only person capable of adaptation in this city . . . . somedays it just seems that way.
