I know it has been awhile since my last blog entry...but things had gotten pretty hectic, preventing me from making an entry. So I would like to apologize to those that read my blog. I will try and update what has happened. Whether you believe it to be true, or not. First off I have been working pretty hard on creating a few computer and system viruses. What for you ask? Well...I can’t really say, but I can say trust me, this is a good thing. It is not just for a immature jerk online, it is for something much greater.
Think, I Robot and you will be pretty close to the answer.
Anyway. So I got my job back as an IT for RoEnterprises. I am working to get a bigger position...but I would have to exploit a few things that I don’t think the company is ready for. Heh...
So in getting my job back, well, I never really lost it, it just took RoE time to get back to normal after the Kraang invasion. Yes, it did happen!
Getting my job back I have been busy and haven’t been able to see friends I really wished to see. I did come into contact with a friend who I felt needed to hear my views on what happened between us. Let him know that I held no ill will toward him, that I didn’t blame him for what happened and that I forgave him. The whole situation sucks! Because my emotions were in a way contradicting what I was saying...I was feeling nervous, not because of him...but because of the fresh memory of what had happened. It sucked...he didn’t need to see me nervous around him like that...
This is where being a Vulcan would come in very handy.
I did get to say what I wanted to say...so I hoped that at least helped. Time will tell I guess.
I found out about what was going on...cause days before I swore I was in the new Avengers movie...at first I thought that it was just me thinking about the movie, you know, how you get a song stuck in your head that you heard in a movie? This song was “I Have No Strings” it played over my computer. I know now that it wasn’t just my computer either. Someone, more to the point, something had hacked into the net. I had an ongoing battle with this thing using codes and firewalls to try to keep it away from my own computer. It hadn’t worked. My computer had literally fried...
My Tower of Galroth...gone...
I worked hard on building that computer! With help from Lenny...but it was my first personally built computer. This AI is going to get it. Not only because of that...but because of the many things that I have heard that it has done to my friends...very recently Donatello...who had to take heavy meds to keep away from the pain he was in. This thing, need to be taken out.
In all this commotion I also have taken on a new responsibility. A pet...if I may say so. A little creature that looks to me, like a favorite anime pet I have seen in a movie. Nausicca of the Valley of the Wind. And because of that I am highly thinking of calling the little thing Teto. Anyway! It is believed to be a mutant, I found it choking on a chicken bone...had to step in and help it. And after taking it to Donatello to look it over, it is back in my apartment, sleeping as I type this.
I was also able to spend the last of my night with Casey. Which helped me out of the funk I was in. We went out to get what was needed for my new little friend. I’m starting to feel a little more comfortable around him. I’m still not all that sure if his side of this is him being flirty. I have been told that he’s into me. Fuji even told me that “he wants to rock my socks off.”. I’m just so worried that he’ll start to learn things about me and...it will change things between us. I’m not a very open person when it comes to my personal life. The things that are in a way hidden behind the fun geeky me.
That side that is so damaged...over thinks things.
I am working on being open with him, cause...I do honestly believe that there could be something there. I want to get to know him more. To do that, I need to let him know about me. Even the insecurities.
This entry is going to be one of my cryptic ones again...just for a fair warning. Yesterday I had found out something...disturbing. I rather not go into full detail about it, in case it could get back to the source I had gotten it from.
So with that said...
Yesterday morning I had gotten up and done something I do this time every year. I go see my mother at the cemetery...always bringing her daisies. They were her favorite flower, and in turn had become mine. Daises are beautiful and fun flowers. After placing them on her grave I sit down on the bench nearby and start telling her about the year that had gone by. If anyone had been listening they would think I was crazy and possibly want to check my into an asylum. I told her about what had happened between me and my father. The Invasion. Having had to say goodbye to Lenny, I even told her about my new friends. One in particular.
Casey had texted me while I was there, and we got to talking about plans for Vivi's Gala. When we were going and just a few of the details with it.
I knew that he was most likely at the lair with his best friend Raphael. It was one of the things that made him attractive to me, taking care of his friends, especially one as stubborn as Raphael. He told me that he had changed bandages on the giant turtle. The whole situation was...crappy to say the least. And I really do want to help, but I am not sure what my presence would do for him. We hardly know one another and I am not sure that I have his trust. It is a little complicated. But I am not going to allow him to believe that I blame him for anything that happened, especially between the two of us. It was terrifying. But I don't blame him.
Anyway...after the talk with my mother, I said my goodbyes and headed back to my apartment, where I played my video games, namely Grim Fandango Remastered on the XBox 360. Up until I needed to get ready.
The dress I was going to wear was one that was my mother's...I saw it appropriate for this occasion. And it was a very pretty dress. I was stumped for a time whether I was going to wear my glasses, or suffer the contacts. It was bad enough getting my hair up in a bun, I have done up wigs many times, so doing it to my own hair wasn't so bad. But it was a bit of a struggle.
When I heard the door, I decided to just go with the glasses. Upon opening the door I saw a very pleasant surprise. Casey Jones was in a suit, a nice classy suit, hair slicked back, I hardly recognized him. But I am a sucker for a man in a suit. Casey Jones pulled it of nicely, very handsome. He surprised me again when he had pulled out the corsage to go with my dress...I couldn't believe my eyes when what I saw was so close to a daisy...I never told him my favorite flower. I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek for the beautiful gift.
It wasn't long after that, that we were on our way. Fashionably late.
Arriving there we found that the place looked like a museum. Inside was incredibly fancy! Vivi was at the door welcoming guests along side what looked like a body guard. This Gala was already raising red flags, especially after telling Casey what it was for. A Gala to Rebuild New York, creating a safer and happier big apple. The people inside were definitely upper class. It was so weird to see Vivi in this surrounding, I knew she was high class...but this...I couldn't understand how someone could be happy in that type of life.
Casey and I found out from Vivi that it had been a grand to get into the Gala...again, red flags, and the food they were serving along with appetizers...was duck, with gold fleck garnish. They were even having a silent auction. It was just all too bizarre. Casey and I were talking about doing some dancing, but it never happened cause things had taken a turn. Vivi had been taken away by a man and her...bodyguard.
And as if we were on the same mind wave...we both talked about going to spy. Only problem was there were guards at the door. Casey had come up with an idea, he was going to become a distraction and get the guards away. I was very impressed by the manner in which he had accomplished the mission. He had both of the guards escort him to the bathroom. It was brilliant. I knew that there was a bodyguard and a fiancee that was in the room with Vivi, so I too had to do some improv. Thank you Drama class! I went into the room pretending to be distraught and disturbed, using my upper class dialect I told the two men that there was a young man in the woman's bathroom harassing me, giving the threat of calling the police.
Luckily Vivi caught onto what I was doing and had pretty much ordered them to go check out what was going on. More red flags...it took me to fabricate a story to talk to my friend.
And talk we did...and what was said...I can't exactly repeat here on my blog. Just know that there is major corruption going on in the city. I only wished that I could help her from the predicament that she was in. Having to be forced into a marriage...to help New York City.
After we talked...I told her it was best that I get going...cause from the text Casey had sent me it was possible that we were made...we had to get out of there, and I knew it wouldn't be long that her bodyguard and fiancee would find that I had lied. So Casey and I got out of there. Heading back to my apartment where he dropped me off. Giving him another kiss to the cheek he was on his way.
After I got myself ready for bed, I decided to call Slim and tell him all about the Gala and what I had found out. I tell you, if we had the motivation, he and I could rule the world. We have come up with a pretty clever scheme ourselves to counter the scandal that was going on. We were going to turn this around and take away money, which would take away power. It was a perfect plan. With a program and codes, it was going to be untraceable. Sure had me all excited.
If you know me at all, when I get myself involved with something I don't exactly let up. I do fear that one of these days I am going to tick off the wrong person. But hey, you got to live life to the fullest. And break a few rules along the way, and mess with a few people.
I had gotten back home and was getting ready for my very first real date. I tell you my nerves were on high alert as I got on my costume. Thinking that maybe it was a little much to go as Black Widow. I had thought maybe to change it up to the costume I had worn to Comic-con last year, which was Pepper Potts. But I finally told myself that Casey already knew that I was going as Black Widow, I had the costume and had been wearing the correct contacts all day...so I needed to stick with it. I was going as Black Widow. The costume was a little loose due to my size and height. This was not all that new to me though. I was able to fix it up as best I could. Getting the costume on I then worked on the makeup and finally the wig. Which was the hardest part of the entire costume! But in the end it was not coming off.
I got a text from Casey who told me that he hadn't been able to find a wig that would work for his Hawkeye costume, so he had used baby powder and temp-hair dye. Stating that he looked like he had old man hair. I doubted that.
We decided to meet at the mini mart to get snacks before we would meet up with Donatello and get the hat camera that was needed. Not going to go into detail on that one. We got the snacks and met up with Donatello. Which was tough work getting to the rooftops. I don't know how the actresses moved around in the tight costumes they wore!
After getting on the roof, we got to talking about a few subjects, one was prepping and how Donatello still wanted me to show him how to prepare a location with storage and what was needed in a bug in location. He didn't want to do a bug out, he wanted to stay in his location and create what was needed there. Which was a good idea considering where he lived. I didn't mention that I had a bug out location, outside the city. That would be talk for another day. It was equipped for the zombie apocalypse.
We also got to talking about cosplaying. It made me happy to hear him say that he believed that Fuji and I would become best friends, noting that she was into cosplaying as well. This made me happy because I have never had a friend who was a girl before. And I really like Fuji, highly respect her, she is unlike others I have met. A class on her own. Plus the accent. I bet there are a lot of things that she and I could talk about.
The next thing that Donatello had done, was take up the role, in a mocking way as my parent, telling Casey to get me home at a decent time. I know he was mocking, but...I was touched by it in my own way and couldn't help but give him a hug for it. Mock concern or not. I needed it.
Anyway, Casey and I left with the realization from Donatello that there could be a line of 'campers' at the theater. Sure enough there were, but it wasn't as bad as we had feared. It was a fairly long line when we got there, and it just grew. Was awesome to see the many people that dressed up, got me all excited. Casey and I talked about this and that about one another. Even got into some conversation and a little bit of a debate with Marvel fans. The famous "who would win in a fight" discussion. Ah fanboys.
Though we had snuck in some snacks we had gotten popcorn and soda, which was pricy. As always. We made sure that our seats were in the middle a perfect location for Donatello's camera hat. Which I am hoping did exactly what it was made to do. Though I have no real doubt that it wouldn't. The things he could make.
The camera went on soon as the movie started. I was so excited, my nervousness sort of took a backseat in that moment. I won't start going on about the movie, though it was awesome! But there were moments in the movie that had given me butterflies. Not because of the movie really, but because of the smooth and charming Hawkeye that was sharing this experience with me. He was a little cheesy about it at first. The whole yawning and stretching to get an arm around behind me. I replied with moving a little closer to him, but the two things that took me off guard was, when a certain mood struck scene came up, somehow he had taken a hold of my hand, I didn't pull away either. Even when I found out what happened.
Then there was another moment, which I kinda, denied in a way? Though I didn't show disgust, nor did I slap him like I had the first time we had met. But during an intense and loud scene I think...still a little uncertain...he tried to lean in for a kiss. I sat up and sort of pretended to be engaged in the scene. I wasn't sure I was ready to...go that far into this yet. It was a first date. Though I still held to his hand, and leaned a little against him to let him know that I was not rejecting him.
All in all the date was. I am going to be cheesy here and say that the date was magical. I was sitting next to a great, good looking guy, who I want to know more about, in costume, watching an amazing movie of an awesome franchise!
It was everything I had hoped for in a first date. After the movie ended and he took me home, I told him that I could see this working. That I wanted to see where this would go, asking him to be patient with me cause this was all new to me and I was a little nervous about it. I got that he understood before I leaned and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek, a little close to his lips. I know some of you would probably scream and yell at me for not fully kissing him...but I am not a girl that just gives it out...I have never been in this situation and I wanted to be honest with him.
His patience would be rewarded in the end.
After we said goodbye I headed on up to my apartment and went to bed.
I never thought that trying to write to someone that hurt you, who you care about, would be so difficult. I have been trying to write this letter for days now. But everytime that I think I got it...I read it over and end up deleting it, starting over.
Yesterday I had gotten to the point that I needed to leave my apartment because I didn’t want to even look at my computer anymore I was so frustrated. I had been able to get a hold of Donatello and my night got better. He was taking a break from the things he normally does (machines apparently :D) so with us both being home alone that night I decided to ask him if he would like company, promising that I would bring over a pizza. Which turned out to be a pepperoni with extra cheese. They were having a deal that also included a case of soda. Couldn’t pass that up.
When I got to the entrance Donatello asked me why I wasn’t with Casey, asking if he was busy. I let him know that I had text him to let hi know where I was, but hadn’t heard back. Also told him that I hadn’t hung out with Casey since having gone out for ice cream. This lead to a conversation about dates, I don’t know what really counts as a date, really. But from what I gathered from the wise Donatello. It is in the girl’s power to decide what is and isn’t a date. I had no idea that I was privilaged to have that type of power. Though I wasn’t fond of the idea. Knowing that I may use it for evil. We all have an evil side to us. Right?
I still need to think of a way to get a certain ninja teenage turtle back for a cruel prank he made on me on April Fools. I jumped right out of my chair! Okay okay...I jumped back and it fell over...with me in it!
When we got to the lair I then noticed that while we were walking...he was limping. He informed me that a mutant warthog named Bebop had done it...with laser hair. That part I am still confused about, but it sounded painful. After the news report I had seen Sunday. I had to ask him about these mutants...I didn’t want to run into one and not know what I needed to do. Run mostly. He gave me the names of the mutants he knew that were not friendly. Though, any mutant would have to gain my trust before I ‘hung around’ them. Donatello had interacted with me online for many weeks before I came to trust him.
Anyway!
I also mentioned the news report I had seen about the teenagers that were running around in turtle costumes wth ninja weapons. As stated by Muckman, the citys monster hero. Maybe there was hope for this city and the exceptance of mutants. Though...Goan Groady...was not very kind to the turtles...having called them children eaters. I have a feeling she maybe a problem in the future. Maybe I can take a job at Channel 6 and defuse things from there as a technician. Certain stories and footage to be lost? Hmmmm.
So, Donatello and I decided to play a game of Call of Duty 3. This is where I got to know his account name. DoesMachines1984. I didn't ask but he told me that TheBrains, was taken. Well mine was no better. GMWarriorPrincess. No it has nothing really to do with Xena, not a fan...but the name was too good to pass up, in most MMORP games I play I choose to be the Female Warrior. Princess was just too good to pass up. Like myself, Donatello didn't care for Xena or Conan.
Though Jason Momoa was a better Conan then Arnold.
Wasn't long after, before we started the game, Casey had shown up. :D We were on a mission to take out the campers. Campers in Call of Duty are those that camp in a location and take people out that run by. They have no real skill in the game so they use this method to take those that do know how to play and are far better the them out. Then try to say that they were sniping.
It is not sniping! It is camping!
We were doing pretty good. Though the headset I could hear the whiny 12 year olds. I tell you what though...never fails. Soon as they find out there is a female playing, one of two things happen, they gang up on her...or they start into the sexual harassment. I am not thin skinned, I have dealt with these type of punk children before. Their intellect is what becomes their undoing. I just have to target that and they shut up. Most of the time. Cause then they sound like idiots. And no one wants to sound like an idiot.
We were doing pretty good as a team. Taking out the campers. I had one kid try his hand at insulting me, but like I said, once you don't react the way they want you to and you target their intellect, they back off. That's right Nick2fast4you.
Then you have the cheaters that just suck the fun out of a game. Clintomous was this ones name, and he was killing me left and right. Donatello even tried to take him out...but his shots weren't hitting him. Figures that someone would take it to that level. I had lost interest not too soon after. Donatello was talking about Bebop again and how he needed to find out how the warthog's suit worked. I suggested using a Broadcasting Signal Intrusion method. Though he would have to keep it on a smaller band otherwise he would pick up signals allover the place. But this suit...it seemed that the only way to figure it out would be to get your hands on the suit it self. That didn't sound easy.
Well, after another death occurred by the cheater, I was done. It was late and I needed to get home. Casey offered to take me home, Donatello wanted to have himself a nice hot bath. I wished him a goodnight and went with Casey...who was wanting to flirt with "Danger".
Don't ask.
It was a great ending to a stressful day. I may have this letter done today.
I hope so...I need to feel some type of closure...even if that is putting the ball in his court.
My day started yesterday after I had gotten a text from Casey Jones he asked if I was excited about the movies, 12 days left! I was excited. We started to talk about snacks to sneak in Gummy bears were on the list for the both of us. As well as popcorn, his mention of garlic popcorn told me that he wasn’t expecting anything close contact after the movie. (Kissing) *cue blushing* He said that he didn’t care what we got as far as popcorn went cause he was going to enjoy the company. I teased and told him that his eyes were going to be glued on Scarlet Johansson. He didn’t deny it saying that her outfit would be hard not to stare at.
And that triggered more teasing. I told him that it was settled I was going to go as Black Widow to Comic-con. Might not be teasing. It would go very well with last years. I was Pepper Potts and Lenny was Tony Stark. Speaking of Lenny, I had gotten a e-mail from him asking about ideas for Comic-con. Talk about timing. Though the e-mail wasn’t easy to answer. Comic-con was months away and...well...things might change by then. I let him know I was thinking it over, would get back to him.
I found that Fuji was at the lair after Casey invited me to come over. Fuji and I had plans to go for coffee/tea so it sounded alright to go to the lair and chat there. But...when I got to the lair, wasn’t so much talking then teasing. A large amount of it from the turtle known as Raphael. But before that happened I got to see the awesome work that Fuji had done for his damaged shell. It was armor and it was amazing! Raphael added a nice touch by putting the Hamato clan crest on it.
Then came the teasing. It was ongoing...talking about sticks being waved...and uh...just things that are making me red right now as I type this. The red banded turtle even made things worse by winking at me. Something that really gets me red. Fuji and Carrie showed up not long after that the teasing didn’t stop, which had me more red I think it was the mention of tea and taste that got the two, Casey and Raphael rough housing. Casey had tackled Raphael and it was on.
I had to ask Fuji and Carrie if this happened a lot, mentioning the paint fight that Donatello and Casey had the other night. It didn’t happen a lot it sounded like. But when it did it was hilarious and worth watching. Can’t say I was used to this type of hang out. Normally it was Lenny and I and we watched movies, Tv shows and played games. Board and video. Anyway...then the rough housing turned into a strip party? Raphael’s mask was the first to come off, then his belt. During this, Fuji asked me if I liked Casey, I told her that I wanted to get to know him...not wanting to just jump into something...it was at this point something had landed on my head...it didn’t take a genius to figure out that on my head were the pants of Casey Jones...my face felt like it was on fire.
I tried to be okay about it and closed my eyes, though my face was beat red I am sure...I took the pants off my head and held them out to him, eyes still closed. I couldn’t get words out of my mouth feeling so embarrassed and a little humiliated. But it was all in good fun, so I couldn’t keep the smile from forming.
Fuji and Carrie were just as amused along with Raphael. Poor Casey, he was more embarrassed I am sure. He got his pants on and in his embarrassment tried to make things better for himself as he stated that no one saw anything but clothing, his “package” was still hidden away. I tried to let him know that I didn’t see anything due to the fact his pants landed on my head...but god...I shouldn’t have said anything! Cause that gave Raphael an opening to tease yet again. Earning a pillow to the face, which put him out like a light...not only him, but Fuji was out not long after. I got to talk with Carrie for a short time, having learned that she had once been mutated. I didn’t get much info as she too had fallen asleep. I thought maybe there was something in the tea...but Casey and I were just fine.
We decided to leave the lair, giving the said sleepyheads blankets before we left. Casey had offered to take me out for ice cream. Before we took off for the ice cream parlor...Casey got a text from Donatello, he wanted to talk to him about Fuji and Raphael. Casey was apologizing in advanced cause he was going to take the call when Donatello decided to call him up. I told him that he had no need to apologize. Almost said more then that...but stopped myself.
Never tell a guy what it is that makes them attractive. :D Not this early anyway.
We got to the parlor, finding one that was open pretty late. I got myself a cookie dough ice cream with nuts and a cherry on top. Casey had chocolate chip mint, one of my favorite. But cookie dough was the one I chose when something was weighing on me. It was perfect and needed for the last few days...
I hadn’t made any entries till now cause I was dealing with that, and didn’t want to talk about it really. Still not ready to just open up about it on this blog either.
Anyway, while we were talking Casey got the call from Donatello and I was more then happy to let him talk with his troubled friend. I didn’t pay much attention to what was being said, but I could hear the urgency and distress coming from the cell. Poor Donatello...something was really bothering him...only thing I understood was it had to do with Fuji and Raphael. That and...something about being naked in bed with Casey?? Or, nearly naked. Something Casey mentioned and I couldn’t ignore. Going to get more details on that later.
When he was done on the phone, it sounded like things didn’t go well. I was worried about Donatello, but it was really none of my business so I let it go. For now. Casey and I then got to talking about what had been weighing on me for days. Not going to get into it too much here. The gist of it was, I had been deeply hurt by someone’s actions, something that I had done about a year ago that cost me.
It was nice to have Casey there, to feel alright about him and open up like I did. Like with Donatello it helped me. Though at this point Casey knew a little more then Donatello, for reasons. Wanting to get to know someone better, to the point of relation status it was only fair to open up about things you haven’t told anyone. I felt more like there was something that could be between Casey and I. Especially since at the end of it, saying goodbye, he had been the one to kiss me on the cheek.
I think it is safe to say...we’ll forget the idea of garlic flavored popcorn.
Gracie (Casey is never naming the kids again CASEY you gave your daughter your ship name! XD)
Gender:
Female
General Appearance:
Pale skin (which looks way paler than I anticipated in this drawing wow), dark brown eyes, dark, dark brunette with a slightly gangly build. She’s most often seen in fandom shirts, and handkerchiefs.
Personality:
Gracie is a friendly girl, who is open, and talkative, on, or offline. Online, she enjoys stalking different fandom sites for all her favorite shows, which range from science fiction thrillers, to cheesy anime. If someone were to proclaim their love for one of her shows? Instant friends! Though, she can be a little sheepish with newer people getting to know her better.
Because she is a scary fan.
All the posters.
All the merch,
In a giant clusterfunk of her bedroom. She can’t quite remember the color of her walls anymore, what with so many posters and printed out fan art she’s put up on the walls.
Special Talents:
Fandom trivia is a great passion of Gracie’s, but life isn’t all about television and web shows (gasp!). She’s also a pretty good artist! (wonder who draws half the fan art on her walls? Hmmm…)
Who they like better:
I think she likes both parents quite a bit, but Gale has to win out on this one. Because while Casey MAY have Sailor Moon under his proverbial fan belt, Gracie can REALLY geek out with her mom quite easily. And often.
Who they take after more:
Casey, definitely.
Personal Headcanon:
Gracie maaaay be a little self conscious about her freckles. Just a little. Even if they’re hardly noticeable (AGAIN Artist’s fault aughgbfh)