Kurt is no stranger to one-night standers, of course, and is infamous for this little activity. The lines about love and sex used to be a blur for Kurt and in the past, a very distant one, Kurt was sure to love and sex were the same things and he´s an expert on the subject. Now, as Kurt looks at his soulmate´s mark it proves how wrong Kurt was with everything.
And maybe in another timeline, he could have enjoyed being in bed with Cerise, however, right now all Kurt can think is where is Kitty Pryde and what is she doing?
Is she kissing someone? Is she in bed with someone? Has she ever said I love you to someone else?
And Kurt lays down on the bed looking to the other side avoiding Cerise who is gazing at the ceiling amused-maybe amusing is not the right word, Cerise has not minded the lack of presence from Kurt and is filling her mind with something else now. Maybe all the new discoveries she made about Earth costumes-and she is the brave one to break the ice and speaks as Kurt didn´t want any of that.
"We can ask Kitty if she wants to join in..." Cerise is twirling her hair still gazing at the ceiling. "She´s really pretty and I wouldn´t mind experiment with her" she blinks as she tries to recall the word to use in this scenario but sadly, the word escape her mind-is funny, she can recall every single aspect of all Shiars and even other aliens civilizations, but, the Earth culture is too strange and too ''alien" for her- as now Kurt moves on the sheets to dress and to face her.
"NO!" Kurt grith his teeth for a moment and then calm himself down. Can I be selfish? Yes, I can and it proves I´m a mess right now. Once counting to 3 Kurt tries to speak freely. An insidious voice - a bit similar to Margalia and Mystique- is saying how Kurt can´t be honest with himself and how he avoids introspection by sheer fear.
Yeah. I do...but I can´t run away anymore.
"Look, I must apologize to you, Cerise." Kurt begins and facing the woman he lifts his arm to show his soulmate´s mark- there´s a source of light from her lamp on which allows Cerise to see the mark- and speaks again. "Do you know what is a soulmate?"
Cerise sits on the bed now hugging the sheets to her body and shakes her head. "I heard you humans have this...I have no idea what this means. We shiars come from eggs, not from the usual way you humans are used. I´d not think I can have children that way...which is not a problem for me nor to any Shiar I ever meet" she states boldly and Kurt wonders if in another timeline he would have taken advantage of Cerise´s naivety.
Kurt sighs. There´s no point in dwell on the past and much less in what-ifs. Kurt needs to be honest and needs to do so now. "To summarize, a soulmate is a person who loves you...Kitty is my soulmate and ...I break her heart once and I fear I may not be a good soulmate for her. We agreed in date other people until she got older through and ...I´m fearing she may be lost to me" Kurt confessed now hiding his face behind his hands.
Cerise hummed softly. "It was pretty obvious. I mean, you just called me Kitty...I thought you were missing her that much ..." Cerise then looks at Kurt not impressed nor cross as she adds. "I´m not mad at you, I knew your heart and mind was in some else and again, I told you this is just an experiment...You´re always looking at the door as if Kitty would arrive any minute"
"Oh, is that´s why you´re a ...what´s the word Rachel used?" she snaps her fingers and then remembers with a smile. "A miserable bitch with Karma? Are you jealous?" she asked now gazing at his form who only nods.
"I fear Karma can give things to Kitty ...I can´t give it. I...look, I never had normal relationships and until a few months ago I thought I was fine but...going after someone who is with a soulmate and finding out the worst way Kitty is my soulmate really prove me how wrong I was" Kurt eloquently explains as the elf is wearing his heart on his sleeve.
"Is her age a problem? Because is something I struggle to understand. She´s old enough to kill, oh yes...Rachel told me about Cape´s adventure, but is not old enough to love you? How come?" Cerise asked confused and Kurt chuckles despite the situation.
"I think...we´re just afraid. I was afraid enough for both of us" and then he changes the conversation as is strange speaking about Kitty after what they just did. "Can I ask something? Why you wanted to experiment with me?" is a question searing in his mind and Kurt never once thought in making with his past flings-the answer of fetishism plays in his mind and goes along with "Kitty wouldn´t do it"- and Cerise is dressing herself and explains her reasons easily.
"Oh, Brian and Meggan are too unite. Rachel is ...Rachel...she has a bad memory of the Shiars and I´d not wanted her to experiment anything she would regret and well, you´re available but Kitty would have been a good option too" and once she´s fully dressed the woman adds. "plus like I said I have no problem in trying with you and Kitty, but, now ...while this soulmate thing seems odd to me...it proves you´re too into Kitty and likewise"
"You think...you think I can make her happy?"
"I think so...but, again, I´d not get soulmates. I think this is something you need to talk with her!"
Seems a bit of joke that Karma arrived first and Kitty took longer to return-for a paranoid moment, Kurt wonders if she´s hiding from him and he has to shake his head from this thought- and in moments like this Kurt realizes how his past actions have consequences as no one in the team is trying to comfort him. Meggan still keeps her distance. Brian is the one who is being professional if anything else. Rachel dislikes him and Karma and Rhane are either confused and at the same time avoid the conflict.
Is she alright?
Is she hurt?
"Kurt, stop asking questions so loud. Kitty is fine!" Rachel states a bit annoying as she clicks her tongue and tries again. "She´ll come back, remember? She´s a member of Excalibur. She´s Kitty Pryde" Rachel concludes calmly now drinking her mug of coffee as Rhane showing more of her favorite bands as she wants to introduce Rachel to new styles since she asked.
Kitty entered a bit late than usual and this time was not because of anything unusual, rather, it was just a problem in her transportation and she waves her arms nicely -and she even jokes to her friends how it was strange to not have to deal with anything strange for once- and Kitty notices Kurt. Kurt notices her.
"Can we talk?"
"Of course"
Karma holds no hard feeling as she knows this arrangement was temporary. Rhane shows support in the sincerest way she can imagine, a hug and promising Karma will find her soulmate.
"I thought...you wanted to wait and date other people?"
"I don´t...I want to know you. I want to be there for you. Even if we can´t date right now ...I don´t want anyone else but you...do you want me?"
"I do...I won´t say I have no reservations...I fear I´m the second-best here"
"NO, please, no. I feel that I´m not good enough for you...I keep anguishing over this and ...I want to be worthy of you and I want to be better for you and for me. Sex and love are two different things and I need to know the difference...I need to face a lot of my issues to enter a healthy relationship, but, I want you in my life"
"Let´s talk. Walk with me, because I do have some issues to face"
The New Mutants is reunited in the party of Brian and Meggan´s engagement and a group hug is issued. Yana not a hug person by nature had no problem in hugging her friends and Kitty is included. "you and Kurt?" she asked impressed and Kitty nods saying only "baby steps"
Cerise invites some of the Shiars who are on Earth for their punishment- Rachel promised she would be ok- and DeathBird arrives and immediately Karma´s arm glows as it did with the other Shiar. "You´re my soulmate?" "What´s a soulmate?"
Dr. Moira is talking with her sister about the news regarding Kitty and her soulmate. "So...her soulmate is a playboy with a heart of gold? Really? That seems the most cliche Harqueline story I ever read" Terry stated and while she was in witness protection- the ban is lifted as the criminal is finally arrested and Terry is allowed to return home- and has lots to catch up.
"Oh, he was a slut...but was suffering for Kitty...He wants to change and be worthy of her. Pretty Mr. Darcy...but I still will keep an eye on him" and she sighs. "don´t want Kitty ended up like me...Charles was a prince at first and then...you know"
"Moira, I´m sorry. The universe will give you a better soulmate"
"Meh, the talk here is about Kitty´s love life and you need to know every detail"
I took an exact-o knife and cut the epilogue out of all 4 of my Hallows books(most of us have multiple copies right?). If it’s not there, I don’t have to acknowledge it.
I so want to do this (I have a few sets myself lol) but the need to rip it out is at war with my need to never harm a book because they are my precious babies. lol
I am crying at the thought that there are only two chapters left. Can I count on epilogues? PLEASE 😭
I knowwww. It’s so bittersweet for me. This was my first fic, and I’m BLOWN AWAY by the support and luv. Maaaybe an epilogue. A lot of people have been asking about sequel/afterwards, so we’ll see how everything looks when the final chap is posted.
