yuri question for you- from what i've seen he's had a bit of a rough life; what do you think was his biggest motivator to seek out something better for himself (as in, what kept him going?) intrinsic or extrinsic !?
HELLO FRIEND WHAT A GOOD QUESTION!
honestly, for a while, it was just survival, pure survival.
I think between the ages of 11-16-ish, when he was in the Doomed Orphan gang proper, he wanted to live because he was terrified of dying. he'd witnessed his parent's horrific ends by gnolls when he was too young to understand that permanent loss. he never got over it. he lived because he had to, with only the faintest hope (ever fading) that it could get better. maybe one day, he'd be saved, right?
at a certain point though, I think he almost gave up. life became a monotonous torture, both at the hands of other men using him and his gang leader's horrific abuse. I think a part of him wanted to join his parents, although he truly believed he wouldn't go to the same 'good place' they went after they died. he had serious survivor's guilt, and felt that (even though he was seven years old) he should have tried to save them.
then, I think there was a breaking point, around age 18, because that's the age he finally ran away from his former gang. to do that meant CERTAIN death if they caught him, but it was also this...burst of desire to live again. he got *out*. even if he was on the run, starving, thinking he only had months to live, he was still living!
and then...against all odds...he does find a better life in the weirdest way possible! picking up a cursed blade owned and possessed by a devil, who becomes his patron and sends him to school where he meets friends, gets a boyfriend and gains the power to resurrect his parents! WILD.