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we were talking about this the other day and i really wanna see your take on the orange theory with the skz boys 🙏🙏
-🌷
ooh yes 😈😈 these get like progressively longer sorry
ORANGE THEORY WITH SKZ!
chan carefully peels your oranges without you knowing, digging into the juice-covered rind no matter the length of his fingernails to appease you. it's all worth it to him to see the way your eyes light up as you lean your body against his, warmth radiating from you.
minho is no better than chan, except for the fact that he's more discreet about it. he'd spend eons by your side peeling them if it meant being with you. he loves the way you chat with him animatedly, eagerly biting into the citrusy wedge...turning away to hide the burning tips of his ears.
changbin pretends to not know how to peel oranges. he complains that his fingers are built for lifting weights, not peeling fruit. in reality, he can peel them fine, but he just loves when you do it. the way your fingers nimbly slip under the peel, pulling it back. he always shows his gratitude through kisses all over your face, citrus on his breath.
hyunjin craves simple acts of domesticity with you. he adores every inch of you, wanting nothing more than to spoil you. he sits at the kitchen counter with you, orange rinds piled neatly upon a napkin beside him. you watch him with an adoring smile as he furrows his eyebrows in concentration, your chin resting on the upturned palm of your hand. your little life with hyunjin is so lovely.
jisung looks at you like you deserve the sky and the stars. he's always been embarrassed he can't peel his own oranges - he doesn't want to seem childish or helpless. he can't help it, though...every time he tries, his nail pierces right through the center and juice gushes out like blood from an open wound. when he admitted this to you, looking at the floor in embarrassment, you murmured a quiet "that's okay. i'll peel them for you, ji." and ever since then, he's been head over heels in love with you. (well, he always has been...it's just more prominent now!)
felix would do anything for you if you asked. you come up to him, a mauled orange laying lifeless in your hands. your lips are turned into a pout. he immediately knows what you want, setting down his phone (your most recent tiktok plays on repeat) and taking it in his own hands. his hands are tiny and lithe, and he peels the orange in no time. thankfully, the inside is safe, as all of your senseless attacks were focused at the peel. you gleefully wrap your arms around him, leaning in for a peck on the lips. maybe he should peel your oranges more often.
seungmin can put on his uninterested act all he wants, but if he really did not care for you, he wouldn't be sitting here peeling oranges for the love of his life. he has little cuts on the skin beneath his nails from picking at them, and he lets out a hiss of pain as the juices sting his skin. as if you were listening for him to make a sound, you appear almost instantaneously behind him, armed with a bandaid and a kiss to make the wound feel better. once it's wrapped, he decides to finish peeling the oranges, much to your chagrin. how else could he repay someone as perfect as you?
jeongin may tease you mercilessly for not knowing how to peel fruit, but that doesn't mean he won't peel them for you! he giggles, saying things like "this is so easy" and "how do you mess this up?" as he expertly peels the orange, separating each wedge neatly. then, he lifts one up to meet your parted lips, a warm smile upon his handsome face. "say ahh." as you open your mouth and he feeds you the orange slice, you can't help but notice his rosy cheeks. "don't ever learn how to peel anything, okay? i've got you."
hi katsy poo... thought long and hard about this and came up w absolutely nothing. i had to dig far into my messy notes app to find ideas and these are from all the way back in summer for context ☠️☠️
have you ever been to the beach/pool and seen a cute lifeguard yk? i was thinking maybe skz as lifeguards - this is derived from a lifeguard chan idea my friend and i were talking about <3 (i just thought - jisung giving you a smooch after saving you but playing it off as mouth-to-mouth resuscitation cause he's too shy to admit he's crushing)
excited to see where your mind takes this! cannot wait <33
BABY THAT’S ACTUALLY GENIUS!?
I can actually see it like -excited sounds-
It got me thinking! So I’m turning this into a mix of small blurbs and I'm not apologizing
I'm trying, but they're hot! —lifeguard!skz
To have a baseline, I don't think Meowracha would fit. Like. i just couldn't picture Minho or Felix in this?? (sorry if you were expecting those two!)
But, because of that, they're the besties who —after a thorough session of negotiating, and a large, strained okaaaaaaaaayy from Minho—, agree to go with you to your usual fitness center, which recently opened a swimming pool facility! (and they've hired a certain group of lifeguards... oh wow...)
(got carried out: 2k words)
"This place smells like plastic. And I can't even swim."
You rolled your eyes as Felix snickered, the three of you checking into the new building.
"Minho, there are other things aside from the pool. That's why I even invited you in the first place, like I mentioned the last seven times you started whining about the exact same thing." You let out an exaggerated huff as you smirked, shaking your head sideways.
You separated from your small group as you entered the changing rooms, and quickly put on your dark-coloured swimsuit, your towel resting on your shoulders when you got in the brand new area.
And let me tell you, it was big.
Impressed by the depth of the building, you couldn't see a couple of small-looking kids running around the swimming pool playing tag in loud, childish giggles.
"Careful!" A voice warned, but it startled you, and you jumped in your place, slipping on the wet floor.
Not one of your fanciest of moments, no.
Or so you thought, until your back didn't quite meet the floor, but instead softly crashed against a lean, warm surface.
Knowing Felix would immediately ask you if you were alright and Minho would threaten to let go in less than a second, you looked up at your saviour, and you were welcomed by a handsome rounded face, eyes small because of his heartwarming smile.
Forcing your stumbling legs up, you froze in front of him and stuttered. "T-thank you. Or... I'm sorry. Wasn't paying attention," you managed to let out, followed by a pink dust colouring your cheeks.
fuck, shit, fuck. why did he have to be hot too?!
"Totally fine!" He brushed off nonchalantly, his smile shining enthusiastically, so contagious you couldn't help but grin back.
He called over the member of staff who had warned you, his voice loud to the point were you had to restrain yourself from jumping in your place again when he screamed his name, not wanting to trip another time, and as he smiled at you and walked off to look for the problematic kids or their parents, you could read Changbin on the back of his red and white shirt, the short sleeves letting you see an extensive trail of inked lines that got lost underneath his top and swimming shorts.
what a piece of cake.
Almost in an instant, a slightly younger lifeguard approached you, not quite panting, but really close to doing so. You got flustered, not knowing exactly how to react, and just stared at him while he rested his hands on his waist, looking like he had run several marathons in less than an hour.
"I'm so sorry...! I should've stopped the kids... or warned you sooner..." He sighed, looking quite tired despite it barely being his first week.
"Don't sweat, I'm okay." You shrugged sheepishly. "Rough day?" You smiled, hoping to get one back from him.
He scoffed, amused. You celebrated silently. "More like a rough job... Uh! I mean, no! I love my job...!" You grinned, raising your eyebrows, shocked yet still unable to hold back a sheepish snicker. "Ah, shi... I mean... goddamnit, please don't tell Chan..." he muttered, defeated.
"Oh, wait, Chan?" You blinked, recognizing the nickname. "Wasn't he a trainer in the gym?"
Catching his breath, now looking less stressed, he nodded, hands still on his noticeably really slim waist, unlike the other lifeguard, who was shredded.
"He and Hyunjin were swapped around because they had more experience than other candidates for the jobs. They're both great, don't get me wrong. But Hyunjin should really stop flirting with the group of girls from the synchronized swimming class..." he huffed, then blushed. "Oh." His eyes widened, and he stared at the floor almost mortified.
"Right, eh..." You smiled, amused at his slip-ups, biting your lip softly.
Jisung blushed even more at your giggles, trying and failing to hold it back because he couldn't help but ogle at your defined and fit body from all the exercise you did, being a member of the centre for quite some time. You were a stunning stranger whose giggles were cute. Too much for his caffeine-filled, sleep-deprived self.
"Jisung. Soon-to-be-fired, lifeguard Han Jisung." He presented himself with tired eyes, the last part more for himself than for you, then covered his mouth when he realized he had said it too loud. "I shouldn't have said that...!"
You couldn't help but cackle, unable to hold back your laugh as his blush got to an even deeper shade of pink.
"I'm just... going to... eh... Jeongin is... probably looking for me..."
"Jisung-ah, fighting!" You teased, and he couldn't help but blush even more, smiling as he rushed back to his assigned area of the swimming pool building.
You realized Minho and Felix had been eavesdropping when Minho passed an arm over your shoulders and ruffled your hair, making it messy.
"Yeah, welcome back, cheater," he tsked, smirking.
You struggled to get away from his deathly grip, and Felix rolled his eyes, just laughing at you two.
"Oi, isn't that Chan?" the freckled asked, signalling somewhere else.
"I care more about that hottie who ran away a second ago." Minho scoffed, focused on his own priorities, sounding offended by the fact that he hadn't been able to talk to Jisung.
Felix waved at Chan, and happily waddled his way to him, the two already close friends.
While Minho hurried off to the sauna, Felix and you tried out the main swimming pool, at first actually swimming, but ending up just chatting playfully, Chan joining in from time to time, and then he stayed close during his break.
You got out of the pool and sat on the edge when suddenly you felt someone tickle your sides and push you, making you fall into the water.
Swimming to the surface with ease, you moved your wet hair from your eyes, hiding half down of your face under the water, looking at Chan, who was chuckling.
“Really funny, Mr. Bang.” You mumbled, faking boredom.
“It was Felix’s idea, but I gotta admit that was funny.” He kept on laughing, and that alone was cute, but because he was on a break, to avoid being called over to work, he had taken his shirt off, not feeling cold in the acclimatized environment.
And the image just looked ten times better.
“Reeeally funny.” You were nodding, as if in deep thought. “Help me out?” You smiled innocently, raising one hand towards him.
He grabbed it, but before he could pull you up, you pulled down, his body falling over yours and staying tightly against you for a second, then you smiled under the water and started laughing as soon as you both got back to the surface.
He was blushing, but also smiling cheekily.
“Fair. I deserved that.”
After a while of swimming, laughing and splashing each other, you got out of the pool leaving Felix and Chan on their own, but felt a soft sting in the back of your thigh. Probably from when you were sitting and Chan pushed you to the water, the slight bumps on the stone might've scratched your skin.
You started looking for your towel, but frowned when it wasn’t where you had left it. From the corner of your eye you saw Minho, and he smiled slyly from afar, your towel resting on his shoulders.
what a bitch.
You ran after him but were quickly stopped by yet another lifeguard.
Really, really lucky you.
You were only able to read Seungmin on the back of his shirt before he turned around and frowned, and you struggled to slow down, ending up bumping onto him.
"I'm sorry, uh, I uh..." you stammered, struggling to find an excuse.
He sighed, and deadpanned at you, in his eyes a hint of mockery that didn't reach his face, and it made you even more flustered. He pointed to a sign on the wall, who said in a big, bold font, "do not run near the pool."
"You probably can swim, but can you read, dollface?"
d-dollface?
“Y-yeah, of course I can. I forgot.” You pouted.
He smirked slightly. “You forgot how to read?”
You frowned softly at the tease, and he brushed it off with one hand.
“Where were you going that was so important for you to be running?” He questioned, the sly smirk lingering on his lips, the mockery still there.
“I wanted to go to the infirmary but my friend took my towel.” You defended yourself, but a blush crept from underneath, making your cheeks pink.
The moment you said infirmary, Seungmin’s entire body language changed. The mockery wasn’t gone, but covered by a layer of innocent worry. Cute.
“To the infirmary? Why? Did something happened?” He asked softly, and it surprised you how fast his attitude had changed.
“I just scratched myself. It’s probably nothing…”
He shook his head and smiled, almost tender. “Nonsense. Can I have a look at it?”
You blushed slightly and turned so he could look at the small scratch in the back of your thigh. The area was red, and there was small even more red lines in it, but nothing too wild.
Seungmin cleared his throat. Stay focused.
“You should still put something on it. I’ll do it. Come with me.”
Crossing from where you were with Seungmin you passed by the kids’ swimming pool, and waved at Han, and who you thought was who he had mentioned, Jeongin, struggling to take care of the kids as they all ran around, fighting with the swimming noodles as they used those like swords, and you couldn’t help but smile at the mess.
Seungmin took a small radio device from his waistband, like a black walkie-talkie. “Send Changbin to area 3. Jeongin, office, 6pm.”
The youngest-looking of all the lifeguards in the building approached you two when Seungmin told you to wait while he looked for the first-aid kit.
“Hi, as you might’ve heard, my name is Jeongin. Did you get hurt?” He said, so softly you almost cooed at him because he was so cute.
“Um, I scratched the back on my thigh, yeah.” You smiled a bit, and he smiled back reassuringly.
“I hope it doesn’t sting a lot.” He added kindly, picking up his stuff from a locker. “I would stay and help you, but I assure you that if you’re in Seungmin’s care you have nothing to worry about.” He nodded, almost to himself. “He teases everyone a lot but he’s a nice guy. I… have to go now, my shift has ended. But it was nice to meet you!”
You bid him goodbye, and Seungmin came back in no time, carrying a small bag of medical supplies and a towel. He left it on the side, and opened the bag next to you, taking a small glass bottle of spray from it.
“Could you stand and turn around, please?” He asked formally.
You couldn’t help but blush when he sprayed the medicine, the slight sting making you gasp softly, but it was more because of the position you two were in, and because he held a cotton pad underneath the scratch, brushing your thigh with his hand.
Being outside of the water for so long now, you started feeling cold, shivering softly.
“Darling, can you pass me the towel?”
You blushed almost furiosly at the nickname and did as told, and he opened it and hung it on your shoulders, as you quickly took it and tightened it around you.
“Sorry, I didn’t give it to you before.” He smiled, throwing the cotton away and going back to put the first-aid kit in its place.
It was almost 7pm when the three of you got out of the changing rooms.
“That was really fun!” Felix smiled brightly.
“It was decent. Still couldn’t talk to that cutie back there. We should come back other time.” Minho stated, sounding like an order.
You blushed, thinking about what had happened in so little time.
“Yeah. We should come back soon.”
(teehee, i enjoyed this a lot! Hope you like it too! Thanks a lot, ren! <;333)
~Kats, who now would love to go to that swimming pool!
chan x gn!reader | drabble | wc: 0.5k
| based off the most recent skz talker and the fact that i cannot paint my own nails 😭😭
chan loves to help you paint your nails.
you are sitting on the sofa, chewing on your lip in concentration. in your non-dominant hand, you shakily hold the brush, attempting to make the paint come out smooth and professional. you would've gotten them done at a nail salon, but you've just been so busy...and what was so hard about doing it yourself? hell, if your boyfriend did his own, you'd be fine.
you are, in fact, not fine, because it looks like the remnants of a paintball massacre are splayed over your hands. it is so damn frustrating.
"baby, i'm home!" chan says eagerly, throwing open the door. "god, today was so long...i'm so happy to be home with you."
he sees you on the couch and absolutely melts. he hasn't even noticed your dismay. his coffee-colored eyes are swimming with adoration. just seeing you, even for a minute or two, is enough to make his day.
he sets his things down swiftly, coming to bombard you with kisses, but stops abruptly when you try your best to signal that your hands are full and your nails are far from dry. instead, he settles for using one hand to maneuver your head so he can press a soft kiss to your lips.
it's gentle and romantic, and he savors the display of intimacy until it feels like eons have passed by, and his long eyelashes flutter open and a dazzling smile stretches across his face. his lips part, as if he's about to bless you with some lovely hymn, and then his eyes fall to your hands, splattered with nail polish.
his trademark squeaky laugh can be heard reverberating through the home.
"awww, do you need some help?" he giggles, his hands trailing down your body until he reaches your own hands, and he takes the brush from you. "may i?"
here you are now, sitting cross-legged on the floor across from chan as he expertly paints your nails one by one, blowing on them when needed and using a small cotton swab to dab at the parts that he messed up on. once he's done, he admires his work.
"absolutely lovely. it's so good on you, babe." he compliments wholeheartedly, leaning in to place a quick peck upon your nose. "i mean...you can pull off everything, since you're so stunning. so damn ethereal. but this is just your color, you know?"
you look away, knowing you're getting flustered by his words.
"hey, keep those pretty eyes on me." he murmurs, his arm wrapping around you, his hand rubbing gentle circles upon your soft skin. "we still have to paint mine so we can match!"
@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.
𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞, 𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞. ˚｡୨୧˚
pairing: Lee Felix x GN!reader
genre: drabble, non!idol au, established relationship, fluff(?)
wc: 1k
warnings: lots and lots of kisses, suggestive, making out, language, pet names (honey, sweetheart, babe, lix)
summary: you have an amazing idea. the idea in question being a romantic tiktok trend that your boyfriend is over the moon about trying.
a/n: so...i was listening to cigarettes after sex and i remembered that one tiktok trend to k., and ik it's dead now but IT WON'T BE DEAD UNTIL I DO IT RAHHHH so here's me feeding you guys while the last two lovertober entries are being worked on
Felix knew something was up the second he stepped through your door.
You had texted him randomly, a cryptic message he'd stared at for an actual eternity (five minutes) attempting to decipher but ultimately giving up.
"come over. as soon as possible."
Were you in trouble? Did you want to fuck him? Was it both? He decided he should just go over to your apartment to see if you were okay. He slipped on his coat and left hurriedly.
You were on the couch, dozing off to some early 2000's movie you couldn't bother watching. When the door opening, you jolted out of the state you were in and turned to stare at Felix, a look of utmost delight upon your features.
"Hi, honey." You cooed, getting up from under the comfy blanket to snake your arms around his neck and press a loving peck to his plush lips. "You look lovely tonight."
Blood rushed to Felix's cheeks, turning them the color of blossoming pink roses. You were wearing his shirt and a pair of simple, black sleep shorts. Felix gulped, trying to fight the urge to pin you to the wall and kiss you until your lips were raw.
"What do you need? I saw you wanted me to come over quickly so I rushed here." Holy shit, he was a blabbering mess. You grinned.
"You know that one Cigarettes After Sex song, right?" you asked, plopping back down onto the couch and pulling out your phone.
"Very specific." Felix teased, hanging up his coat before awkwardly sitting down beside you. However, he relaxed once you leaned into him, your head resting on his shoulder.
"Hey! But it's called K., and it's that one where it goes like 'Stay with me, I don't want you to leave'..." you tried to explain, and Felix giggled.
"Yes, I know it. Did you call me all the way here for a song recommendation?" You shook your head, before zeroing in on the black, form-fitting turtleneck he'd been wearing beneath his heavy coat.
"Not really, no. There was this trend that was going around...I don't remember when, but every time I hear the song I think about it." You mused, gasping softly when one of Felix's arms made its way to wrap around your waist. Good god. "You look really hot in that turtleneck, by the way."
"Thank you, sweetheart." he laughed softly, pressing a kiss to your exposed neck. "Now, what was this trend about? I feel like I know what you're talking about..."
He knew exactly what you were talking about. To be honest, he was overjoyed you were even bringing up the idea to him. Being kissed all over by his partner sounded like the perfect Saturday night.
"I hope this jogs your memory, then!" You pulled up a video you had saved on TikTok, moving your phone over a little so that he could see it better. It showed some girl putting on lipstick, and messing it up. Then, a hand reached into the frame to wipe it away, and the camera panned to show her boyfriend, covered in lipstick marks and staring at her affectionately. "So...what do you think?"
Felix was staring in awe. Which pretty much answered your question.
"Please use that one burgundy lipstick you have. I'm begging you." He murmured quietly, still staring at the video on loop. You laughed out loud with glee, dashing off to go grab it.
Felix was waiting patiently, staring at the empty doorway as the distant sounds of you rummaging through your drawers excited him to no end. He just hoped he wouldn't get too excited...
When you finally came back, holding the tube of lipstick he loved so, he swore the butterflies flitting around inside his stomach began migrating. He changed the position he was sitting in so he could lay his back comfortably against the armrest of the sofa. Unfortunately, every one of his emotions were on full display as you climbed on top of him, straddling him.
"Wow, you're pretty red, Lix. I'm a little worried that the lipstick might not show up!" You slyly teased him, only adding more color to his adorable cheeks. He reached up to caress the soft skin on your cheek, his lips curled upwards into an endearing smile.
"Babe, I love you and your teasing but put on that makeup and fucking kiss me already." Felix grumbled playfully. You had no hesitation as you applied the dark lipstick, leaning down to press kiss after kiss onto his freckled face until his skin was stained red inside and out.
Felix felt like you were edging him.
You'd kissed everywhere except his lips, and it was making him feel embarrassingly needy. You noticed this, and with an airy giggle, you moved towards his lips. However, at the last second your head swiveled and you left a mark on the corner of his lips. That was his final straw. With a groan, he reached up and pulled you down so he could kiss you passionately, his hands going to your waist to steady you.
His kisses were dripping with love and adoration, fiery with desire. They slowly became more and more intimate, tongues dancing with each other. Your hands went to his blonde hair, holding them tightly. When you pulled away, a string of saliva connecting you to him like some otherworldly string of fate, your lips were swollen and his were the color of spilt red wine.
"You can't jus' leave me hanging like that, sweetheart. C'mon, get my neck too." He said, panting. His chest was heaving. You liked it.
"But you're wearing a turtleneck." You pointed out, blinking once, twice.
He grinned.
"Exactly. Go ahead, take it off of me." With his help, his expanse of tanned, bare skin was exposed to you. A perfect canvas to create art upon with your lovely lips.
Needless to say, you never finished filming.
@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.
han jisung x reader | wc: 0.9k | genre: hurt/comfort, sick!fic, highly self-indulgent | warnings: mentions of illness, mentions of anxiety, non-sexual nudity, language, NOT PROOFREAD | a/n: i couldn't find a jiji sickfic so i wrote my own. voila bitches
when you called jisung to let him know you were sick, he dropped everything in his possessions to scramble home to you. it was an odd sight for chan and changbin - they'd been going over an upcoming song that needed a little more reworking on the outro when jisung's phone buzzed. he held it up to his ear, a quiet "hi, jagiya" just barely leaving his lips.
the two men with him watched with equal amazement as his eyes widened. jisung hung up almost instantly, shoving his things into his bag and dashing out of the studio. incredulously, they stared at each other for a moment or two before getting back to work.
jisung arrived home in record speed, out of breath as he stepped into your shared apartment. there you were, curled up on the sofa almost pitifully, a trash can filled to the brim with used tissues beside you.
when you saw him, your eyes were watery and you hugged yourself tighter. in that very moment, the world around jisung stopped. all that mattered was you. he came closer to you, wary of your sickness but prepared to toss caution aside if you needed him that badly.
"i'm so useless," you spat, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. you were shivering- or were you trembling? jisung didn't know. he wasn't a doctor. "i can't even keep myself from getting sick, and at such an important time too. hell, i can't even perform basic tasks. i'm achy as shit."
his heart rate quickened. he didn't want to let you down, ever. but what if he did? his anxiety was threatening to take hold of him, its dark tendrils peeking out of every nook and cranny in his body. he forced himself to remain calm. his most important mission was helping you.
taking a deep breath to ground himself, jisung knelt down beside you, looking up at you with his large, dark eyes.
"hey, look at me. you didn't do anything wrong, okay? you just got sick. that's not your fault at all. how about you go get ready to take a nice, hot shower, and i'll get you something to eat. then, once those two things are done, we can watch a movie together."
you nodded, hesitant, and slowly made your way to the bedroom, a fleece blanket still tightly wrapped around you. once you had disappeared, jisung pulled out his phone and called minho.
"hi, min? can you do me a huge favor? i'll pay you back for this, i promise. you're a better cook than i am, so could you make a batch of chicken noodle soup? thank you so much, man. i owe you."
minho could never turn down a plea from his best friend, and he heard the worry hanging upon every word. he immediately got to work on the soup.
meanwhile, jisung reunited with you in the bathroom, where you were testing the shower's water to make sure it was hot. sure enough, the room was becoming steamy, perfect for your congested nose. you began to undress, but stopped when you noticed jisung's shirt was peculiarly on the ground.
"ji, what are you doing?" you asked, stepping back. he gave you a soft smile, causing your heart to flutter.
"i'm showering with you. you said it yourself: you feel so achy you can't perform mundane tasks. let me help you, please." he tried to take your hands in his, but you pulled them back.
"but if you get sick, it'll...it'll all be my fault. you're on an important schedule." he scoffed at your words.
"i'd rather be sick so you could take care of me. you'll owe me, won't you? now let's get in the shower...i don't want the bill to get any higher!" he finally grabbed you, helping you out of your clothes and into the shower.
"that's because you hold full-on concerts in here, doofus." you grumbled. usually, whenever you showered with him, jisung did not wait to make suggestive comments about you. but this time, all that escaped from his lips were soft, loving words of praise. you truly brought out the best in him.
you stood there, your legs ready to give out on you at any moment, knowing that jisung would catch you. the feeling of his soft, soapy hands carefully massaging your scalp was tranquil. he helped wash every inch of your body, his eyes never leaving yours.
it was endearing, you reminded yourself, how jisung knew the risks of helping you. he had a career where he needed to be healthy all the time. but in this very moment, it was just you and him. no obstacles or fears were there to harm you. you knew moments like these were finite, tangible only until your brain was weary with forget. you were determined to keep this memory forever. to tell jisung when he needed a story to cheer him up, and maybe even to tell to your own children someday.
by the time minho arrived with the soup, you were sound asleep on the couch, in your favorite pajamas and tucked carefully into the blanket. your head was in jisung's lap, and his eyes were filled to the very brim with devotion.
he wished you could stay here, beside him, until his final moments.
@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.
⋆₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆ 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐬𝐤𝐳!! ❆ ₊⋆౨ৎ
pairing: Stray Kids x reader (OT8)
genre: Slice of Life, Fluff, Comfort, Established Relationship
warnings: Language, A tad suggestive in Felix's part
a/n: Merry Christmas everyone! This has been queued since Thanksgiving lol I didn't know when to release it. Feel jolly rn.
𝐜𝐮𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍 ･:*:｡❆
It's snowing really hard outside.
You'd have to squint in order to see the dim streetlights, hidden by the storm of ice and the piercing cold brought along with it. You know very well that if you were out there for just a little bit, you'd be shivering, fingertips numb and lips turning blue.
Luckily, you are snuggled into your boyfriend, his strong arms wrapped tightly around you as you sit in solace on the couch. A warm blanket is delicately draped across his broad shoulders.
In front of you, a warm fire roars, warmth emanating from its core of orange and yellow flames. The room is oddly silent, except for the soft pitter-patter of snow against your window and Chan's quiet, melodic hum.
"What are you humming, baby?" you ask with a giggle, absolutely adoring the way his cheeks redden from your words.
"Well...it's a song I've been composing." he says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I wrote it for you. It's a love song...and I'm gonna release it on Christmas. Do you like it?"
"I don't know the words, but the melody is really pretty." you assure him, and his fingers intertwine with yours as a content sigh escapes his lips. "I can't wait to hear it."
He maneuvers you slightly so that you're now sitting in between his legs, his hands on your hips. His thumb rubs languid strokes onto your soft skin in the shape of a figure eight.
"I really don't deserve you." he whispers, his lips ghosting the shell of your ear. "You're so amazing, so lovely. So perfect for me."
His nonstop kisses make their way to your neck and collarbone.
"Can we stay like this, just for a little while longer?"
So, you will stay in your little bubble with Chan, forever and ever. Until the snow stops, at least.
𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐨𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐇𝐎 ･:*:｡❆
The moon is high in the night sky, bright and full as it blesses the Earth beneath it with light. You're inside, having a small party with family and friends. It's not completely silent, as your home is filled with sounds of lively chatter and glasses clinking against each other, but it is tranquil.
You're standing in the arch of the doorway, talking animatedly to Hyunjin about a present you bought for your boyfriend, who is currently watching from the distance. He is definitely not pouting. Jisung stands beside him, patting his shoulder.
"I think you're overreacting, Min." he says teasingly, eliciting an eye roll from the older boy. "C'mon, they're just talking to Hyunjin. He couldn't hurt a fly."
"But he's attractive. And they've known him so much longer than they've known me...and they haven't kissed me in three fucking hours." he says the last part with such fervor it sends Jisung into a fit of giggles.
"Three whole hours? I'd think you were being starved just hearing that."
"I am!" Minho whines. When your adorable laugh, the one you only save for him, reverberates through the crowded room, Minho feels his blood boil. "Oh, fuck this."
He pushes through the room, soft echoes of "sorry" and "excuse me" falling from his lips. When he reaches you, Minho pulls you into his chest and flashes Hyunjin an unfathomable glance. Hyunjin takes this as his cue to leave (thankfully) and once he does, Minho pulls back, keeping his hands on your hips.
"What was that for?" you ask him with a light giggle. "You seemed so annoyed. Are you and Hyunjin not on good terms right now?"
Minho shakes his head. He tightens his hold on you, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. His cologne smells so good, you think you might be a little dizzy.
"'Wanted some time with you, just the two of us." he mumbles into your shirt, pressing kisses all along your jawline. "Please? For me?" However, he stops when he hears you chuckle lowly, watching as your index finger extends to point upwards. Minho's gaze follows it until it reaches its destination: a trio of dark green leaves held together in a bow by vibrant red ribbon. You smile.
Minho's arms reach around you, caging you to the side of the door as his lips meet yours in a passionate embrace. He's never intimate in public with you, resorting only to hand-holding, but at this point, he just wants to be with you. He wants to feel your lips on his until the sun rises.
𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐍 ･:*:｡❆
"Don't let go of me, 'm gonna fall!" Changbin whines, a gloved hand tightly squeezing yours as you gracefully skate across the ice. Your boyfriend unfortunately is not as graceful.
It was his idea in the first place. He wanted to take you here, to show you his amazing skills, until he remembered one very important thing:
He could not ice skate to save his life.
Now, here you are alongside him, expertly gliding along the ice as if you've done this your entire life. You ask Changbin, time and time again, if he wants to hold onto the side so there's a smaller chance of him falling, but he is too prideful. He shakes his head, his cheeks reddening.
"No way! I'm no kid, I can ice skate."
And yet, he still holds onto your hand for good measure. He says it "brings him good luck", and you simply giggle and continue skating through the rink with him at your side.
"It's not my fault that I'm slowing you down. We're at two completely different skill levels." the way he's looking at you now, eyes large and round and the cutest little smirk upon his lips, you can't help but grin at the sight. He's lovely, isn't he?
"I guess you make a good point, Binnie." you sigh, going to pat his shoulder when his hand clamps around your wrist in a vice grip.
"If you let go of me, I'm suing you." he says with absolute seriousness.
"For what?!" you laugh loudly, slipping your arm out of his hold. Changbin wobbles for a moment or two before gliding easily along the ice and when you call out to him, telling him a tip or two, he slows down until he is completely stopped.
"I...did it. Baby, I did it!" he gasps. You let out a sound of joy, skating towards his waiting arms to give him a celebratory hug. Unfortunately, his unsteadiness and your speed ends with the two of you on the cold ice, laughing so hard you can't breathe. "Aren't you proud of me?"
"So proud. Wanna try a twirl next?" You ask slyly.
"No."
𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐍 ･:*:｡❆
"Turn around for me, love. I want to see the whole outfit. You look divine."
It is not uncommon for such words of praise to fall from Hyunjin's beautiful lips, especially towards you. Hell, you were only going to buy a new sweater for a Christmas party but Hyunjin just had to tag along, and now here you are, in the goddamn Versace store, walking out of the dressing room with your boyfriend staring on in awe.
This outfit is far too expensive. It's amazing quality and it looks great, but it's designer. However, Hyunjin doesn't mind one bit. If you didn't stop him, his credit card would be drier than a desert, used up from buying you all kinds of things.
Hyunjin wastes no time paying for everything you need without you lifting a finger. He leaves with you by his side, his fingers intertwined with yours. When you find yourself in the center of the stream of people once more, his hand is quick to change its position to the small of your back, guiding you through the crowd.
Your next destination is a surprise: it's a kids' toy store. You have no idea why your boyfriend would lead you here, but once he starts looking, taking out his phone and checking something on a mysterious list.
"Hm? What's that for, Hyune?" you ask, the tips of your fingers brushing against the sleeve of his hoodie. He looks over at you, his beautiful lips curling into a lovely grin.
"I'm buying presents for Angel Tree. I felt like giving back this Christmas. Don’t you agree?” you feel your cheeks warm at his words. He’s such an amazing person and never takes what he has for granted.
You crouch down and begin searching for the perfect presents until you and Hyunjin have more than enough. It feels good, you think to yourself, helping people. It feels even better doing this with the love of your life at your side.
After your vigorous shopping trip, you want nothing more than to grab something warm to drink, so you drag a very unenthusiastic Hyunjin to a nearby coffee shop. As you're walking, you pass a jewelry store. And Hyunjin makes a mental note of the beautiful diamond-encrusted ring in the window.
𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐉𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆 ･:*:｡❆
Movie nights with Jisung are always the best.
After a long day in the studio, he wants nothing more than to cuddle on the sofa, a mug of warm hot chocolate in one hand and his other wrapped around you. You're snuggled into his side, the rise and fall of your chest soothing. On the television, Home Alone is playing, although neither of you are paying it much attention.
You pull his mug over to you gently, taking a sip. A speck of whipped cream remains on the corner of your lip, and Jisung's eyes nearly pop out of his head.
"Baby, you've got something riiiight...here." he grins, leaning over to press a soft kiss to your lips. You can't help but giggle into it, smiling widely. You go to lean in for another kiss, but you are met with the soft skin of his round cheeks. He turned his head just before you could get to him, hearing some crash coming from the movie.
"Oh my god, he just burned himself on the doorknob!" Jisung says, laughing loudly. "Did you see that?"
When he checks to see if you're watching, he's met with a pout upon your adorable (and extremely kissable, in his opinion) lips. It's obvious you're trying to make him feel guilty for unknowingly rejecting your kiss earlier.
And it works. It works very well.
Jisung whines, flopping on top of you, his arms wrapping around you so he can hug you tightly. You pretend to be uninterested, to be more focused on whatever scheme Kevin McCallister is cooking up.
"Don't look at me like that." he practically cries, shoving his face into the crook of your neck so his words are muffled. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Babe..."
You giggle, giving the top of his head a kiss.
"I forgive you." you whisper, but he doesn't respond. He's fallen asleep, his arms around you, his breathing soft and gentle. Although he can sleep anywhere, he'll really only sleep around you. You're his safe space. You allow yourself to sink into the pillowy cushions of the sofa, closing your eyes and falling asleep with the man of your dreams.
𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐗 ･:*:｡❆
The windows are fogged up from the cold, intricate ice crystals forming on every pane of glass. But you don't exactly give a shit what's happening outside. The world could be on fire, but you wouldn't even notice, too caught up in the secure and cozy atmosphere inside.
Ambient Christmas music plays in the back, sweet and festive. Every other room in your homely abode has dimmed lights. Except for the kitchen, of course. You're very busy in there, having the time of your life with your boyfriend.
Strewn across the counter is an array of measuring cups and ingredients, along with icing and gaudy Christmas-themed cookie cutters. You bite your lip in frustration. No matter how much you stir it, the wet and dry mixes just won't combine. How does Felix make it seem so easy?
You feel a pair of hands brush against your hips as your prayers are answered. Behind you stands Felix, who leans forward slightly to make a much appreciated comment on the mixture in your bowl.
"You're doing a great job." he murmurs, the deep timbre of his melodic voice making your stomach do a series of aerial tricks. "One thing, though. You're stirring it, and that's not getting it anywhere. Try folding it...may I?"
Once you nod, giving your approval, Felix's hands covers yours on the wooden spoon. With precision and expertise, he repeatedly folds the dough into itself until it is completely combined.
"Thank you so much, Lix!" you coo, turning around to meet his soulful brown eyes. His hands rest against the counter on either side of you, caging you in his frame. You lean forwards to press a kiss upon his sugary lips, savoring every moment. He smiles, a hand moving to brush a few stray strands of hair out of your face.
Your arms wrap around him, and he reaches for the back of your thighs to carefully lift you onto the counter, the cookies long forgotten.
The way his arms are so snug around you and his lips fit perfectly with yours like some romantic jigsaw puzzle doesn't need to be studied - you already can confidently say it is a surefire sign that you and Felix are soulmates, fated by the heavens. You sigh contentedly as his hand slips under the warm fabric of your sweater and onto your cool skin.
And then, the nagging buzz of the timer interrupts your intimate moment. Ugh. Now you have to wait a little longer until you can have him all to yourself.
𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍 ･:*:｡❆
You've waited all year for this.
Now that the air is frigid and winter has arrived, lush layers of snow have come along with it. You are excitedly watching, waiting, hoping for the snow to reach a point where you can go out and enjoy it freely.
You're always so busy, you never get the chance to cherish the beautiful joys of nature. But this time, now that you're on a break and spending time with Seungmin, who is adoring as ever and more than willing to follow you on whatever journeys you embark on.
He comes up behind you, arms wrapping around you as he leans his head onto your shoulder, pressing his lips against the soft skin. You close your eyes, smiling at the quiet intimacy of the moment. Words are not spoken nor needed.
Once the temperature is cold enough, you pull on a winter coat and boots while you wait for Seungmin to be ready as well. As you're about to venture into the snow and ice, a gloved hand grabs yours.
"Your shoe is untied, hun." He says gently, kneeling so that he can tie it himself. You feel your cheeks warm up and your heart flutter. At this point, you won't be cold at all out there. "Is that better?" when you nod, he smiles and opens the door to your own winter wonderland.
The chilly air pierces your lungs as you step out into the snow, the crunch of it under your feet sending good vibrations all throughout your body. It's lovely, the feeling of tiny snowflakes landing upon your cheeks...
Until you get taken out by a snowball from behind.
Seungmin stands there, smiling wider than ever, holding a carefully-packed-together snowball or two in his hands.
"Wanna take your best shot?" he asks, a twinkle in his dark eyes.
"That's not fair!" you pout, and he just about melts at the sight. "You played baseball, this is rigged." Seungmin looks down at his feet, his cheeks pink from the cold...and the embarrassment. Were you really offended? Did he hurt your feelings?
And then, he feels something cold and powdery crumble apart upon his head at rapid speed. His expression quickly turns into a smirk.
"Oh, you're on."
𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍 ･:*:｡❆
You've set aside a special place in your living room for the Christmas tree. It is nestled into the corner, yet is a hub of life, love, and memories, and you want nothing more than to cement your devotion to Jeongin by asking him to aid you in decorating it. He's sorting the ornaments, sitting cross-legged on the floor.
"Wow. Was this you as a little kid?" he asks, staring in awe at you in your little Santa hat. You feel yourself getting all flustered, hiding your face in his hoodie. He laughs at this, lifting your chin up with one of his fingers to press a kiss to your nose. Who knew your Innie could be so charming? "No, don't be embarrassed! You looked adorable. Nothing's changed since then. You've got the same smile."
He hands it to you, watching with a grin as you hang it on the tree. You would've very much loved to have some sort of color or aesthetic theme for your tree, but all different kinds of ornaments from various points in your life just seemed more...sentimental, you know?
"Where should we put this one? It's the last one." Jeongin asks, showing you a palm tree made of glass. You love this ornament, you recall with gentle fondness. You got it in LA while traveling with him on tour. You were so sure that he was the one for you, that you'd make it to Christmas with him. If you went back in time to tell your old self that you really did make it, you'd definitely swoon.
"Let's put it near the top, so everyone can see it and how far we've come." you point to a spot deemed absolutely perfect for this ornament...until you come to a revelation.
Neither of you can exactly reach up that high. Sure, Jeongin is tall, but he's not really tall enough. And it's a pretty big tree, too. This is going to need some problem-solving. Thankfully, Jeongin is quick to come to your rescue.
"Easy, baby. I got you." he says with newfound confidence, his large hands lifting you up. He keeps you steady while you fasten it upon the evergreen's lush branches, and admires your work once you finish.
And just like that, your connection with Jeongin has become something more. As he clicks the tiny remote and the tree lights up beautifully, you can't help but squeeze his hand and relish the fact that you are so incredibly lucky, this Christmas, and forever more.
@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.
'𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰. ⋆｡˚❆
Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader
WC: 2.1k
Summary: He always knew you would be the one for him. From the moment he met you. And now, he plans to love you eternally. In every lifetime.
A/N: It's Margaret day (Dec. 18) so here is a lovely oneshot in honor of it <3 This song is so beautiful to me and I hope to portray it into words by the very best of my abilities.. also Fem!Reader is mentioned once or twice but anyone can read regardless of gender!
Ever since you were tiny, with small hands that could barely fit around your father's, you've dreamed of this occasion. You've dreamed of the flowing white silk adorning your frame, the vibrant flowers clasped in your gloved hands, the melodious aria playing in your ears as you walked down the aisle something akin to a movie.
In your dreams, the figure waiting at the altar ready to intertwine his soul with yours has always been a mystery, shrouded in a milky fog you rendered impossible to push away. So you'd wait. Wait until the time was right and the sun would shine, clearing the fog and bathing your husband-to-be in golden light.
You know now that man is Christopher Bahng.
From the moment he smiled at you for first time, everything everywhere in the universe came to a screeching halt as you felt yourself falling for him. For the scrunch of his nose and the crinkle of his dark, soulful eyes. For the way the sight of his dimples made your stomach flutter with delight. You knew from the start that at the end of the day he would be yours. He would be the man in your dreams, hidden by the fog.
Now those wishes have come true, and more than you could ever imagine. Life with Chan is simple and sweet. You've always craved the intimate domesticity you saw emanating from movie couples, the cuddling and the kissing and the little acts of service that proved they knew each other better than anyone else.
Life isn't exactly like the movies, though. You aren't stupid. But Chan makes it feel that way. He makes your heart pound with adoration when he comes up behind you while you're making dinner, wrapping his arms around your midsection and pressing a kiss to your shoulder. You swoon whenever you open your eyes to see him staring at you, a saccharine smile upon his perfect lips. You are blessed to even think about spending the rest of your life at his side. It was always a hope, a wish.
But now, as you stare at yourself in the oval mirror, your body adorned in hues of white and a lacy veil upon your head, your wish has been fleshed out and exposed. It is quite simply, a miracle. And now, a reality. It hits you like a truck. You are getting married. To the love of your life, your first and final flame. In less than an hour, you will have the sacred right to call Chan your husband, to raise children and grow old with him. A single tear slips down your face. It is the first of many that will flow like a river today.
From the tent where you've spent the last three hours getting ready, you can hear quiet conversation and a soft symphony playing as people get to their seats. Chan must already be up there. Your heart rate quickens. Will he like how you look? Will he think you're beautiful? It's a foolish thought, as you know to the very depths of yourself that Chan loves every single atom in your body. He loves you when you are at your happiest, your smile bright enough to power a city, and he loves you at your lowest point, falling apart in his arms when you think you cannot do a single thing right. To him, you are the very oxygen that keeps his lungs working and his blood pumping.
Your bridesmaids come up to you, whispering words of encouragement with wide grins before they are whisked away. One after another, you hear the 'oohs' and 'aahs' from the crowd. You fight urges to peek outside. You and Chan had both wanted a more private wedding, opting to only invite family and close friends. And it was 100% worth it, you wholeheartedly believe. Although the promise of loved ones cannot quell your shaking hands and beating heart. You fidget with your hands, waiting until it is almost your time.
You sigh with relief once Minho, your longtime best friend, slips into the tent, smiling sweetly at you as he takes your hands in his.
"You look amazing. God, you're all grown up now." his voice is filled with multitudes of love for you. From the moment these dreams began as a child, you've known Minho was going to be the one who gave you away. He's watched your heart get broken time after time, comforting you each and every time as gently as the first time it happened. And then, because of him, you met Chan. You will forever be indebted to him. "Are you ready to go? They're all waiting for you. You're going to stun them."
And you nod, a nervous smile upon your lips as Minho links his arm with you. The music crescendos as you step out, and all eyes fall on you. They gasp at the sight of you, people clutching their chests with excitement. You can't help it. You beam, your face radiant.
You don't want to look at Chan yet, still taking in the scenery. The venue is outside, not a single discrepancy in the beautiful sunset. The color theme is white, matching your attire, and paired with the vibrant green vegetation, it looks absolutely divine. Your bridesmaids are giggling and waving to you, unimaginably proud of how far you've come. You pass Chan's family, soon to be yours, and his mother places a hand over her heart in silent gratitude. A thank you, for being her son's one true love.
When you look to the right, you see the remaining six of Chan's boys, dressed to the nines and watching the scene with utmost excitement. You can't help but chuckle when Felix wipes a tear away, eliciting merciless teasing from Jisung and Hyunjin. But even from here, you can see they have watery eyes too. They have nothing but adoration for Chan, and they are your family just as much as they are his.
Then, your eyes fall on Chan. His jaw is to the floor staring at you, taking in every inch of you. When you step up the altar opposite him, he is quick to take your hands in his. His voice is shaky as praise falls again and again from his full lips.
"Oh my god, you're beautiful- you're so- I can't even find the words for it. You've enchanted me. I can't speak." Noticing him getting flustered, you snicker. The officiant unfortunately interrupts your moment.
"May we begin?"
The first part is a blur, the only part you vividly remember and will forever cement into your cerebral is Chan squeezing your hands tightly as he looks deep into your eyes and says the two words that will change your life: "I do."
He never once looks away from you. Not when the officiant cracks a joke or two that bring his infamous dimples out, not when he is carefully slipping a silver wedding band onto your ring finger. When he is done, he lifts your hand up and presses a chaste kiss to the ring. It sits right alongside the brilliant diamond he proposed with, and the crowd releases a collective "awww". When you put his ring on, you do the same. It is a sign of respect and equality. There will never be an imbalance between you.
And finally, it is time for the vows. You wrote these the day after Chan proposed. You knew exactly what you'd been waiting to say to him all this time.
"This feels unreal to me. I still can't believe I'm standing here, about to tie the knot with the only person who has ever made me feel this way. I've never been so giddy when I'm around someone. I've never been so lonely and mopey when you're away. I want to spend every waking moment thinking about you if we are too far away from each other to touch." He's about to cry, it's so obvious, so you rub soft circles upon the skin of his hand. "Love is an inexplicable thing. It's fickle and can be mean, and I always thought it was out to get me. But I was wrong, because I was blessed with you. Love is far too soft of a word for me to use, because the way I feel about you could never be explained. I could dig through every page of every book, meticulously searching for the right term to use, but it would be to no avail. So you must trust me when I say that I love you, although there is so much more complexity than just those three words. Trust me when I'm falling apart and trust me when I'm doting on you like there's no tomorrow because just know that you are making all of my childhood wishes come true by being you. I promise to love you even when your hands are gnarled and you complain a bit too much about your back hurting. I'll love you when you finally become the old man Seungmin is always telling you about. And finally, I'll love you because you make me human."
The audience takes a moment for your words to register, before it is Chan's turn to say his vows. He takes a moment to compose himself before he begins, his eloquence taking everybody by surprise.
"Thank you, angel. That was beautiful. I still remember the first time I saw you. I was at Minho's birthday, and it was getting too stuffy, so I went up to the rooftop to catch my breath. You were up there, in all your beauty, and I swore I wanted to marry you right then and there. Your hair was blowing in the wind and you were wearing white, and I was like 'Shit. You're gonna be mine one day' because I knew that you were trouble and I didn't care because I would go to the ends of the earth for you to even look my way. It was then, I knew. I knew that you would make me the happiest man on Earth. I knew that I would love you for the rest of my life, even if you didn't feel the same. I remember our first date, when we curled up on the couch together and we watched 'Tangled', and the way your eyes lit up at Flynn and Rapunzel's relationship, and I knew instantly that I was going to give you something so much better. Your body is my home, and your arms, my shelter. Our youth may fade, but our love will never be anything finite. Our souls are intertwined now, tied together by the string of fate that led us here. I will search for you in every lifetime. Even if you are on the other side of the world, I will travel the seven seas for even a glimpse of your face.l love you, forever and evermore."
His words are like a drug, seeping into your system and mellowing you out until you can only think of him. You tune out the ceremony until you hear the words you've been longing for ever since you saw him.
"I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may kiss the bride!" And in the blink of an eye, Chan's arms are wrapped around you so tightly you fear your body will disintegrate if he loosens his hold on you. His lips are on yours, kissing you with so much passion and intensity that you two are one. When he finally pulls away, he wraps his arm around you and you look towards your friends and family with a smile. Now comes the final part of your ceremony. The sky has mellowed out now, a shady of navy blue speckled with shimmering stars that you would never see in the city.
Hand-in-hand, you kneel down beside a lantern with both of your names inscribed upon it with a heart. Together, you light it and lift it up so it dances in the breeze, traveling up, up, up, until your love has reached the heavens. You watch it go, your head on Chan's shoulder and his arm around you.
"Thank you for loving me." you whisper in his ear.
"Don't thank me like this is a chore, it is a choice. And from now until the end of time, my choice will always be you."
@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.
𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 - han jisung
pairing: han jisung x reader, lovertober entry viii
genre: fluff, comfort, non!idol au
wc: 8.9k
warnings: brother's best friend!han, language, mentions of alcohol, reader is OBLIVIOUS and jisung is WHIPPED, making out, gets very suggestive, getting caught, starts really fucking slow.
a/n: daylight. lover's final track. what a fitting way to end lovertober. thank you all so much for the immense support i received with this series...can't wait to see you for my next one!
p.s., i'm sorry about the length (i got carried away </3) and the delay (i have been so so so busy), please enjoy!
you'd known han jisung for a very, very long time.
you were ten years old. it was a sunny september afternoon, and you were sitting on the brick stairs of your childhood home, watching with annoyance as your stupid brother and his stupid friends played football in the front yard.
your brother minho, ever the athlete, was the quarterback, of course. he was yelling terms that were so foreign they sounded like another language as the scrimmage commenced. you were bored out of your mind.
that is, until one of his friends sat down beside you.
"hi. you're min's little sibling, right?" he asked. his knees were covered with scrapes and cuts, a bandage places hastily over his left one. he had fluffy black hair and two dark eyes you could get lost in if you looked for too long. he gave you an awkwardly adorable smile.
you nodded skeptically. minho's friends were usually up to no good.
"yeah. why?" you asked, and he giggled. it was cute.
"i always see you hanging around whenever i come over, so i just wanted to know. why do you sit on the step watching if you never play?" he asked, genuinely wanting to learn more about you.
"my mom wants us to get our exercise in, so she basically kicks us outta the house until it's dinnertime." you explained quietly. a little "oh" formed on the boy's lips. "what's your name, by the way?"
"jisung." he said playfully, extending a hand out to shake yours. "and you're yn, right? minho's always talking about you." as if he'd been listening in, minho appeared behind him in an instant.
"jisung, we're down a player. you can't just be chatting up yn like that." he rolled his eyes. after jisung muttered a string of insults beneath his breath, minho crouched down to your level. "if he starts nagging you again, come get me, okay? i'm your big brother. i've got to be looking out for you."
"he wasn't nagging me, though?" you said, confused. "we were just talking." minho sighed.
"okay...but i'm gonna keep an eye on him. i don't care if he's my best friend. he hurts you and he dies. violently."
being friends with lee minho meant ground rules were established. they were short and to the point, usually things about privacy and things people say and whatnot, but there was one main one, one he enforced the most.
yn is off limits. no exceptions.
to minho, the idea of any of his friends dating one of his family members was just so weird. he didn't really want any of them to hurt you and have to cut off a valuable friendship. so, he made it very clear to them that they frankly did not have a chance with you.
jisung was sure he did, though.
he knew his feelings for you were so wrong, and that minho would most likely gut him if he ever told him, so he bottled them up. for years and years. fighting urges to kiss you silly when he saw your outfit for prom, when he saw you in a swimsuit, anything. once he went away to college, however, he hoped that his feelings would simply melt away and he could move on from you.
how terribly wrong he was.
fast-forward to a decade later, he was now standing outside your front door, inhaling deeply. he knocked once or twice before minho excitedly opened the door.
"hey, jisung." he stepped aside so jisung could enter, smiling widely. "how's college going?"
your final years of high school were peaceful, yet lonely. minho and his friends had ventured off to different universities, leaving you to fend for yourself. jisung, namely going to some fine arts school where he was pursuing a career in music production.
jisung caught minho up on how life was going, expressing his dismay about being dumped as he slipped into the kitchen to grab a drink.
"i didn't think you'd be drinking this early, ji." minho teased. jisung laughed, taking a swig before offering it up to him. when minho shook his head, jisung chugged the rest of it with a chuckle. "oh, by the way, i've got something to tell you. don't be weird, but yn's coming home too. i think they'll be home...in an hour or so?"
jisung choked on his drink. so much for not being weird.
"there's no way." he muttered, resulting in minho raising an eyebrow. "i haven't seen yn in what- two years? three years? how...are they?"
minho smiled, almost slyly, checking his phone.
"you're about to see."
the front door opened, and you came in frantically, your face lighting up as you saw your older brother. you rushed over to him to give him a tight hug. when you turned your head slightly to see jisung, your face lighting up into a dazzling smile, jisung swore actual butterflies were flying around in his stomach.
you had gotten fucking hot.
somewhere along the line, you'd had some glow-up that turned you into something akin to a fallen angel. (actually, you'd always been gorgeous to jisung, he'd just noticed it more now).
"as i live and breathe, han jisung!" you beamed, hugging him tightly. jisung swore his cheeks were blooming red. you smelled like lavender and chamomile and he wanted to wake up and smell that every single day of his goddamn life. "you're so different, oh my gosh. you look amazing."
your jaw was honestly dropped at his transformation. he was lean, yet muscular, his body toned and tan. his hair was curly, a chocolatey brown color that complimented his eyes and skin tone so well. and when he looked at you, smiling, god...
"tell me all about it!" jisung said a bit too eagerly, leading you to the sofa to sit down with you. "how is university? have you made a lot of friends? what are you studying?"
his question made you remember a necessity.
"wait! thank you so much for reminding me, ji. i've gotta text my boyfriend and tell him i've gotten here safe." you smiled cheekily.
jisung saw red.
"i didn't realize...you were in a relationship." he said with gritted teeth. you nodded, a bit confused as to why the mood suddenly changed to something much tenser.
"yeah, um, it's not a super serious one, we've really only been together for like five months tops, but he's sweet." you said awkwardly. something about how jisung was staring so intently at you made you feel like you had to explain yourself.
"what's he like?" jisung asked indignantly. "uh, y'know, just in case i meet him...so i can...get along with him better."
he was not slick. how the hell did you not pick up on it?
he didn't know, because he breathed a raggedly sigh of relief as you laughed and began vividly describing your boyfriend, eliciting a grimace from jisung. god, this guy sounded fucking annoying.
"let's see...he's absolutely my type. he's adorable, kind, funny, caring, and hella talented. he's a great singer." jisung was a greater singer too. probably even better than this guy. he would crush him in karaoke. "but i wish he could play the guitar...that would make him so much more desirable to me."
jisung had a guitar in his trunk he was fighting demons not to go grab. it was the way your boyfriend sounded like a carbon copy of him that had him fuming. for fuck's sake, he was right here!
it was unfair, in jisung's eyes. once you'd admitted that your boyfriend had a very short temper and could be very controlling, he'd whipped his head around so his eyes could meet minho's. minho simply shook his head.
knock it off, he was saying.
how the fuck was this absolute douchebag able to date you but jisung wasn't? it was so fucking rigged.
your boyfriend wasn't even that handsome, either. he looked like any average twenty-something year-old guy. if anything, he had absolutely fucking nothing on jisung. jisung was the hottest guy he knew. a solid twelve out of ten. this guy was a four or less on a good day.
he reassured himself, remembering he had so many fucking weeks with you, without your boyfriend. his only problem, however, was not you or that guy you were fawning over. it was lee fucking minho.
twelve years and not a single ground rule changed. jisung was still not allowed to make any advances on you. therefore, he had to get better at being sneaky.
his first (and only) attempt to get you to break up with your boyfriend was on a wednesday. it was rainy, diminishing the possible activities you could do, so you opted to watch a movie with minho, jisung, and one of their other friends, chan.
it was some horror movie you couldn't stand one bit, jumpscares at every turn. you were flinching and hiding your face in jisung's shoulder. he wrapped a strong, comforting arm around you, to which minho gave him a look.
"hey, i got you. it's just a movie." he murmured softly into your ear. you giggled.
"ji, stop it. you're so cuddly, i have a boyfriend." you whispered, not to interrupt the movie. the words stabbed him in the throat.
"i know." he said quietly, drawing his hands back slightly. "but he's not here right now. you don't need to talk about him. you were talking just yesterday about how you were worried he didn't care for you. why are you still with him?"
"well...my friends are his friends...and we have so many memories that i'd hate to lose..." it was excuse after excuse. god. this guy had really fucked with you bad. maybe if your boyfriend ended things with you, you could learn to truly love someone, namely a super sexy and talented guy named han jisung.
"that's no reason to still be dating him. you could always try and end things on good terms and then-"
"jisung, enough." your voice was firm, implying this was the final time this conversation would be held. so much for trying. eh. he'd never been much of a negotiator in the first place, anyways. now, he just had to hope and pray and pray and pray for some amazing miracle.
four days later, it happened.
minho called jisung over to hang out. the day was rooted into his mind. they were laying on the sofa, one of the cats on minho and another in between jisung's legs, scrolling through social media. you were off in your room, on the phone with your boyfriend. the walls weren't super thin, so he couldn't really hear your conversation.
until the volume raised. louder and louder until you were full on yelling and jisung could hear every single sentence. every single word. every single vowel and consonant that left your lips. you were furious.
judging by the bits and pieces he was straining to hear as he acted disinterested, your boyfriend was pissed that being back in your hometown with all of your brother's friends meant that you were fucking them behind his back or something. you were on your last straw with his controlling attitude and you lost it.
"i'm so sick of you! we're done. don't fucking text me or call me." you snapped, hanging up and flinging your phone (jisung knew this because it made a loud crash, tumbling to the floor).
minho stood up awkwardly.
"i'm gonna, um, go check on them." jisung stumbled to his feet, scaring off the cats.
"i'll come with you, min. yn's close with me, too." minho wanted to say something, it was so obvious. but his mouth remained shut as they walked towards your room.
you were laying on your bed, crying. your eyes were red and the mountain of crumpled tissues upon your nightstand progressively grew and grew.
"honey," minho began, his voice soft. he only ever referred to you that way, gentle and caring. this, jisung knew all too well, was the very reason minho was so protective of you. minho had loved and cherished you since the day you were born, fighting off the monsters in the dark just to see you smile. it wasn't that minho wouldn't be able to forgive anyone who hurt you, he'd never be able to forgive himself.
and that in itself was his biggest fear. jisung was minho's closest friend and confidant. minho trusted jisung with his life. however, this also meant that accidentally hurting you would be seen as the greatest betrayal of his life.
you flopped over, staring at minho with red-rimmed eyes. he sighed, a sweet smile upon his seemingly cold features. you really brought out the best in him.
"i'm sorry about what happened. do you need me and ji to get you anything? something to eat or drink, a blanket, more tissues...or if you want to talk, i'll stay and listen." he sat down on the bed, and you sat up to scoot over and lean into minho, fitting with him like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.
"is it raining outside? i wanna look at the stars. me and him used to do that and i want solace." you mumbled as minho rubbed your back. he turned to jisung, thinking for a split second.
"i'm going to start making you some dinner. a good meal will get your mind off of this. the hill outside is perfect for stargazing. jisung can go with you. come back when you're feeling hungry, okay?"
you nodded. jisung's heart skipped a beat. this would be his first time alone with you all break! a win was still a win, regardless of whether or not the situation was ideal.
and now, here he was, laying in the cool grass alongside you. you were moping.
"there are clouds everywhere! it's not worth it. of course the universe fucks with me on a day like today." you whined. jisung gave you a hug, cursing himself when you flinched. was he coming off too strong?
you were right, though. a thick layer of clouds completely covered the stars, painting the sky a drab dark gray. the only thing that could be seen was the bright reflection of the moon, shaped into a mere crescent.
you clung to him, creating a damp spot on his shirt with your tears. he wrapped his arms around you, letting you cry into his shoulder.
"it fucking sucks, ji. i'll never get to go on all the dates i planned with him. i-" your voice broke. he patted your back. "i had a list. a list of all the things i was gonna do with him. now who can i do them with?"
"you can do them with me!" he interjected, a bit too frantic for his own liking. when you looked at him weird, he had to come up with some quick excuse he'd pray you'd believe blindly. "not in any romantic sort of way, but if you want to do them, i'm right here. we have all the time in the world."
you really didn't.
you gave him a tired smile before hugging him tighter.
"you really would? that's so sweet. you're such a gentleman, jisung."
that night, he died and came back to life. and so, the most important mission of his life began.
mission: make yn fall in love with me and do it all without minho finding out was officially a go.
he was snapped out of his daze when minho opened the door to the back porch, signaling that dinner was ready. like the perfect brother he was, he'd cooked up three plates of your favorite meal. your eyes lit up at the plates neatly made and you finished it almost instantly. minho and jisung watched you as you slid the fork between your lips for two very different reasons.
the way minho looked at you was almost motherly, like he wanted to hide you under his wing and keep you safe, to protect you every step of the way. his heart was absolutely shattered seeing you so beaten up over your now ex-boyfriend. he should've known, he told himself again and again as he sliced the vegetables, he should've known that guy was bad news. he wanted to wrap you in a bone-crushing hug and spill words of remorse and sorrow from his heart-shaped lips, to apologize for not being there for you.
jisung wanted to kiss you until you were a flustered mess beneath him. he wanted to run his fingers through your hair and caress your soft cheeks. he would have to shake these thoughts off for his next week, a week filled with definitely-not-dates with you.
monday
you stared at yourself in the mirror, spinning a bit to see all of the angles of your outfit. you'd just recently bought this top and you were a little unsure about it.
ending things with your boyfriend had completely thrown off your schedule for your break. and here you were now, getting ready to go to an aquarium with someone you hadn't seen in years. a knock sounded on your door. it was soft, as if the echo was a question.
"come in," you said, a tinge of unsureness upon your tongue. the door slid open to reveal jisung, wearing a cute crewneck and baggy jeans. he began smiling widely once he saw your outfit.
"you look stunning. i- i don't even have any words to describe you, you look so lovely. like the first warm day of spring." you felt your cheeks heat up at his words. for somebody so energetic and funny, he certainly was eloquent. it was as if he had some magical control over words and syllables, combining and separating them until he'd made the perfect match.
"thank you so much, ji! you look amazing too." his outfit was simple yet stylish, the color palette blending incredibly with yours. jisung never went out of his way to put this much effort into an outfit. was there any reason? (spoiler alert: there was)
his cheeks flushed pink at your words, and he outstretched one hand for you to take.
"shall we go?"
you'd never really noticed his hands before. you'd never really needed to in the first place. but they were soft, as opposed to the small callous on his index finger, probably from writing lyrics and schoolwork all the time. his hands weren't huge, but they were larger than minho's. his nails were painted expertly and delicately in hues of navy blue.
"i didn't realize you still painted your nails." you murmured, and he looked up, laughing sheepishly. "i remember being so jealous that i could never paint mine like you did. that's why i always asked you to do mine for me."
"practice makes perfect, i'm afraid. but you can ask me anytime, and i'd drop whatever i'm doing to help you. just say the word and i'll be there in the blink of an eye." his declaration seemed a bit off for just helping you with your nails, but everybody expressed emotions differently, so you shrugged it off.
his hand was still outstretched, never once faltering, as if he knew at some point, no matter the journey, you'd take it. and you did.
the aquarium was somewhere you'd always wanted to go with your boyfriend. it held such nostalgia and beauty that you'd been dreaming of the day you could go there with someone you'd enjoy it with. you were happy it was the first idea on your bucket list, something to get your mind off of the miserable day before.
you honestly still couldn't believe you were doing this with han jisung himself, anyways. he was your brother's best friend, and he was way too cool for you. he'd seen you as a little sister his entire life. this idea of his was out of the care and concern of his heart in the utmost platonic way possible.
jisung, on the other hand, was trying not to trip over his own two feet as he held your hand, seeing the awe in your eyes. he squeezed your hand with excitement, hoping his hand wasn't sweaty or anything. oh god...what if it was? he told you he needed to "readjust" his hand before profusely wiping it on his jeans until he was certain it was drier than the gobi desert.
the aquarium was absolutely beautiful, in shades of blues and greens. all sorts of aquatic creatures reside behind walls of glass, swimming around without a care in the world. it was divine. you walked around with jisung, hand in hand, pointing out various sea creatures. he seemed especially taken by the sharks, excitedly swiveling his head between you and the tank whenever they swam by.
eventually, you made your way to a room in the back of the aquarium, a large rounded glass tank in front of you. the lights had been dimmed to a midnight blue, letting the pale moon jellies show themselves. they languidly floated around, a dazzling sight. they were like clouds of the sea.
a wooden bench with a black leather cushion was positioned next to one of the tanks, and you and jisung sat down to rest your feet, weary from all the standing. he was looking through his camera roll at the photos he took.
you smiled at the little things he does. you'd been noticing them much more recently. the way his lips stretched into a crooked grin when he saw something he liked, the way he pouted if a picture came out bad or too blurry. it was endearing.
but it was also odd. the last time you'd been able to identify such minuscule details about jisung was when you were fourteen years old and had the fattest crush on him known to man.
you pined over him for a good seven months, making all sorts of excuses to hang out with minho and his group of friends. most of the time, his answer was a solid no. but sometimes, when he'd sigh and say "yes, but be good", you'd try and have all sorts of conversations with him. you loved his enthusiasm and interest as you spoke, as if he was hanging onto every word.
eventually, you came to the conclusion that he saw only ever you as minho's annoying kid sibling and was only being nice to humor you. you'd laid in bed, crying into your pillow, face warm from guilt and humiliation. from that day forward, you were always wary of men. you were scared that they wouldn't like you if you were too forward.
it was incredibly foolish, you realized. you'd based this claim off of absolutely nothing at all. you'd assumed jisung didn't like you. but there was no way he did, you were a hyper and silly kid and he was a teenager focusing on sports and whatever guys did.
"hey," he said, snapping you out of your walk down memory lane. a small smile graced his pretty face. "wanna take a picture with me and the jellyfish? we can make them into matching polaroids. i know you wanted to take polaroids with your boyfriend as a like- a couple idea, so we could be killing two birds with one stone?"
it was a great idea. you scooted closer to him, and he leaned in. jisung wrapped an arm around your waist, and you softly gasped at his gentle contact.
"say cheese!" he smiled brightly and you did along with him. you didn't think you'd be smiling like this the day after ending a months-long relationship. and yet, it felt like some enormous weight was lifted off your heart. you felt...free. and happy. really happy that you were experiencing this with han jisung, out of anyone.
you were so caught up in this inexplicable feeling of joy you didn't notice the pretty pink colour on jisung's round cheeks, or how he was staring at you the entire time.
tuesday
"have you seriously never been to a drive-in movie? not once in your life?" jisung asked in shock, from where he was leaning against your doorframe. he held your list in his hand, scanning it up and down. "they're holding one tonight. guess what they're playing?"
you thought to yourself.
"hmm...some cheesy-ass movie from the 80s?" you guessed, eliciting a chuckle from jisung's lips. you'd spent the entirety of your time "sleeping" and thinking about them. he'd been plaguing your mind all day- not that you minded, though.
"close enough. they're playing grease. that's from...1978, i think?"
you sighed, getting up to run a hairbrush through your messy hair. you couldn't go out looking like shit. that would be horrid.
"is it really?" at his nod, you giggled. "damn. i thought it was the 80s. i can't really make that assumption, though. i've never seen it in my life."
the way jisung's jaw dropped to the floor was so comical it was almost cartoonlike.
"what the actual hell. you've never seen grease?" his expression was stony, and for a second you were scared you offended him. then, you remembered it was jisung, who was rarely ever serious. "get your things and get in my car. we're going right now. you cannot go another second without seeing grease."
so here you were, in the passenger seat of jisung's sleek black convertible. he was driving well, focused on the road. at one point, his hand absentmindedly drifted over to rest upon your thigh. you felt your cheeks begin to heat up. when jisung became aware of the placement of his hand, he retracted his hand in a flash, apologizing profusely. his face was beet red. it was adorable. you grabbed his hand and put it back on your thigh, much to his astonishment.
"it's okay. i don't mind." you murmured softly. "you're not hurting anyone with your hand there. and the physical contact feels nice. the warmth of your palm on my freezing leg is enough for me. makes me feel human."
jisung absolutely melted at your soft words. now this, this funny feeling in his stomach which only surfaced around you, that he yearned for day after day while he was away at university, was exactly what he craved.
if he really did succeed in making you fall for him, how would it go? he'd done some digging, and your university was only a half an hour or so away from his. he could imagine it now, so vividly it was almost a film playing in his brain on repeat. he could text you sweet messages like "good luck!" or "how was your day?" and if he felt like it, he could come see you.
he would be the best boyfriend ever. way better than that dickhead guy.
he pulled into the drive-in theater, where an assorted group of cars where already there. various people had already settled in and were watching the beginning of the movie. few families were there, but most of them were people on dates.
"do you want to get out of the car? i have a picnic blanket my roommate from university lent to me that i'll gladly lay out on the grass, if that's what makes you comfortable." jisung suggested, pulling out a patterned grey blanket from the back seat. "i'm okay with whatever you want."
"let's sit on the grass. we're on a hilly area, so we'll still have a good vantage point. and besides, from up here, you can sing your heart out."
"we can sing our hearts out." he corrected. "don't think you're getting out of this one easy, hun. be happy i'm not forcing you to learn the entire 'greased lightning' dance."
you'd always liked funny guys.
the movie began, the plot exactly how you imagined it. however, it was actually really good, with fun choreography and surprisingly good songs. jisung knew every word, an imaginary microphone magically appearing in his hand the minute he heard the first few beats of a song.
it was so fun. he'd pass the "microphone" to you, staring at you in awe when your lips parted and you began singing the melody, soft and sheepish from embarrassment. your voice was heavenly. like the song of a siren, the way you hit every note with talent and poise and then proceeded to giggle it off saying "you weren't as good as him" was absolutely insane.
at some point, you had become so incredibly engrossed in the movie. rizzo was walking through the school, singing her heart out and it was so powerful you didn't even notice the wide expanse of goosebumps covering your body.
"oh my goodness, you're shivering." jisung noticed with urgency, and you peeled your eyes away from the screen. now that your focus was no longer on the movie, you felt the chill begin to overtake you. you snuggled into jisung, trying to capitalize on the heat leaving his body.
"you're right, i didn't even notice..." you gasped slightly, your teeth chattering. jisung pulled off his coat and gave it to you.
"here, put that on." he said, getting up to grab something else from his car. what was he hiding in there?
"won't you be cold without your coat, ji?" you asked with concern. he was wearing grey sweatpants and a long-sleeved shirt that wasn't made of any warm material in the slightest. he grinned, pulling out a fluffier blanket and wrapping it around the both of you.
"not anymore." he moved in closer until you felt your body against his. it was almost therapeutic. your head fell onto his shoulder, eliciting a tiny gasp from jisung's adorable lips.
the drive home was anything but silent as you excitedly rambled about the movie, explaining your favorite parts to a quietly satisfied jisung. he loved listening to you talk about things that made you happy. the way your hands moved to match your words with fluidity, the way your voice became higher with some foreign excitement. it was just like how you were when you were little.
"what are you smiling about?" you teased, noticing his adorably rosy cheeks in the pale moonlight.
"i'm sorry...i just absolutely adore listening to you talk about things you're passionate about. it's so endearing." he admitted, immediately focusing his eyesight towards the road ahead as to not see a reaction he'd be disappointed by.
if he'd just looked with his periphery, he would've noticed the flustered mess you'd become with a single response.
that night, you laid in bed, thinking long and hard about your relationship. these endeavors with jisung were exactly what you'd wished for time after time with your ex, only for him to fall short.
wait.
now that you were spending time with him again, you'd come to a conclusion. han jisung and your ex-boyfriend were uncomfortably similar, with their clothing and hair styles, their mannerisms, and their personalities. it didn't give you uncomfortable flashbacks in the slightest. in fact, you came to a massive conclusion.
you'd never gotten over jisung.
that was why you'd dated someone so similar. and you were still just as hopelessly in love with him as you were when you were a teenager.
oh shit.
saturday
you were in too deep.
every single date with jisung, you fell more and more in love with him. with his smile, his laugh, his gorgeous eyes, his caring nature, every single thing about him.
with every touch he placed on your skin, light as a feather, you felt yourself tread further and further past the point of no return. you couldn't stand it. you were running out of opportunities to confess.
what if you never saw him again after this? the next time you'd see him would probably be his graduation, and by then he might be in a relationship with someone. not a good one, because you'd come to the conclusion that nobody loved jisung like you did. even when you felt like you didn't, some core part of you kept that.
you loved passionately, most of the time confidentially. you kept your crushes to yourself. but if you had determined that you quite literally could not live without him, now that you'd grown so accustomed to seeing him every day.
you were in your sleep clothes, an oversized hoodie that was a hand-me-down from minho and flannel pajama pants when minho knocked on your door.
"good morning." he said softly, smiling at you. he held dori in his arms. "i made us breakfast. care to join me?" you loved weekends when you were with your brother.
your parents were always busy, so you'd really been raised by minho. he worked as a dance teacher outside of his studies, working late nights at the studio just to provide for the two of you. you loved your brother, to the moon and back.
you sat at the table, eating breakfast, contentedly listening to him talk about how his students were progressing nicely. you were so busy trying to get a piece of a scrambled egg onto your fork you almost didn't hear him pop the big question.
"so, um...jisung has been coming over a lot recently. care to enlighten me as to why?" he asked, almost nervously. "he's my best friend, yet he's coming over for you, and you're hanging out with him what- every night? i'm not mad at you or anything. i just wanna know the truth."
you sighed. you were much too embarrassed to admit you had any sort of feelings for jisung. it wouldn't hurt if you didn't lie...rather...skirted around the central idea, would it?
"he's been helping me cope with my breakup. i love you and i know i can tell you literally anything, but there's just something different about telling your story to a friend. you already know it, min."
minho probably did not believe your sob story one bit. however, if he didn't, he clearly didn't show it, because his lips parted to release a soft "ohhh."
"i get it. thanks for being honest." his words sent a pang directly to your heart. you hated lying to your brother. but, you were going over to jisung's house tonight and you had to make sure there was no suspicion on minho's part.
after a strenuous hour of getting ready, you were finally prepared. you took a deep breath, knocking on jisung's door. his family home was in your neighborhood, luckily, so you could just walk.
he opened the door, his eyes warmed at the sight of you.
"you've done it this time. you're the most gorgeous person i know. there's no competition. i know you're just in casual clothes, but damn." his mouth was agape, and he looked you up and down. you laughed at his words, trying to avoid the fact that your face was burning from his simple compliments. "i'm rambling, oh my god. let's go inside."
he stepped aside so you could enter. you'd always loved his house. his parents were very fond of interior design, so it was so architecturally beautiful it made you smile. the couches, walls, paintings, and doors were all color coordinated. once jisung led you through the door to his room, your lips stretched into an even wider grin.
it was so...him. rock band posters were plastered everywhere, and it was organized and minimalistic. he had a computer and some producer supplies, and in the corner of the room sat a gorgeous acoustic guitar.
"wow, it's so beautiful!" you said in awe, running a hand down the smooth wood. "i've always wanted to learn how to play. can you play some songs for me?"
he nodded, pulling the guitar off its stand.
"let me tune it real quick, and then we're good to go. any song recommendations?" he asked as he began tuning the instrument. his fingers moved swiftly, expertly. he bit his lip in concentration. "sad songs? love songs?"
"a love song would be nice. you can choose one." you responded, coming over to sit beside him. he thought for a bit, before beginning to strum a lovely chord progression. the song was on the tip of your tongue, and once he started singing, you were in for it.
i found a love, for me...darling just dive right in, and follow my lead
it was perfect. of course it fucking was. you felt your stomach flip with delight, playing into some hopeless fantasy that he was singing it for you. that he was playing the guitar so beautifully, trying to convey a message.
i found a girl, beautiful and sweet...oh, i never knew you were the someone waiting for me
you inched closer. his eyes were focused on yours, and he sang with a smile, never missing a beat.
'cause we were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was
was he singing it to you? was he telling you to your face that he loved you, or were you just delusional?
but darling just kiss me slow, your heart is all i own, and in your eyes, you're holding mine
you couldn't do it anymore. he had to know. you couldn't hide it anymore.
"jisung, stop." you said shakily, and he obliged.
"what is it?" he asked, concerned. had he done something wrong? he would admit, he was carried away with his serenade because all of his feelings were so fucking real, but if he was making you uncomfortable, he'd stop instantly.
better now than never.
"um, this is gonna sound really weird, and you have every right to say no or tell me to get out..." you were rambling, and jisung was silent with an unreadable expression. "i have, like, really strong feelings for you. and it didn't just happen. i loved you when i was little and i love you now, i just stuffed these thoughts away to the back of my mind. if you think about it, my ex was just a cheap copy of you."
jisung wasn't talking. he was just staring at you with his jaw dropped.
oh shit. you fucked everything up. over a decade of friendship. ruined.
"it's okay, i'll just go, i'm so sorry...it's obvious you don't like me back." you said, humiliated. as you went to leave, you felt jisung's hand wrap around your wrist.
"did you just say i don't like you back?" jisung murmured in disbelief, shaking his head. "oh my god. you are so fucking oblivious."
you cocked your head.
"what?"
he led you to sit on the bed next to him, his skin flush against yours.
"how have you not realized i've been head over heels in love with you since we were in grade school?" he sighed. "i never pursued you because min doesn't let any of his friends date you. but i thought of you every day while i was at university. i dreamed of you when my brain was too tired to think. i dated here and there but i was a horrible, horrible boyfriend because i never wanted them. i wanted you. but you never noticed me pining over you. does that make sense?"
you nodded, fighting the tears of joy threatening to fall from your eyes. you reached a gentle hand towards jisung's, and he enveloped your hand in his, holding it tightly.
"can i...kiss you?" he asked softly, waiting for your permission. you nodded, your heart racing as he leaned in. his thumb brushed against your cheek as his lips met yours in a gentle kiss ten years overdue.
it was sweet, laced with a quiet passion that grew as he kissed you again and again. it was so lovely, almost as if fireworks were shooting off in the distance.
when he finally pulled away, his hand rested on your hip and he was breathing a little heavier, staring at you with a twinkle in his molten chocolate eyes.
"will you grant me the immeasurable honor of being mine? no lies and no miscommunication this time. i promise." he held out his pinkie, and you giggled as you curled yours around his.
"you've got yourself a promise, ji." you replied, bursting with delight.
a realization dawned on jisung. he hadn't even brought minho into the equation.
"one problem. minho wouldn't be happy with me if he found out about this. he's told his friends and i it for years- you're off-limits. but now...i just broke his rule. we're gonna have to sneak around behind his back..."
you patted your boyfriend's shoulder. god, it felt divine being able to say that.
"it's okay. he won't catch us." you laughed softly, giving jisung a hug, solidifying your love in stone.
thursday
you'd almost been dating jisung for two weeks! this was an achievement for you, because every single day you were with him felt like you were drifting away on a fluffy cloud of ecstasy. he made you unfathomably happy.
so far, hiding your relationship from minho was going surprisingly well. to try and throw him off of your trail, the three of you started going out more when minho didn't have work. you'd also convinced jisung to prioritize minho's texts and hangouts for the time being.
it was a lot easier said than done, though. minho was observant and cautious, picking up on any unusual signs and forcing you to come up with lies on the spot. he'd look skeptical, but not push the question, thankfully. however, some gut feeling told you he'd find out any day now.
how would he find out? you asked yourself. would he see you two in public from a distance? would a friend inform him? would he find out accidentally? it was a scary thought.
one night, you were laying on your bed, reading some book your mother had recommended to you. it was an amazing book, filled with intrigue and plot twists that left you reeling and begging for more. in between your legs, resting his head on your chest, was jisung.
you'd learned from him being your boyfriend that he was a total sucker for physical touch. like a koala, he was always clinging to you by any means possible.
"baby..." he whined, flipping over to rest his chin on your tummy. "what's in that book that could possibly be more important than me?"
"someone just got murdered, ji. they're trying to figure it out." you replied ignorantly, eliciting a whine from jisung. you giggled, reaching a hand down to entangle your fingers in his dark curls. he sighed dreamily as you massaged his scalp.
"boring, boring, boring." he muttered, grabbing your book out of your hands and placing it neatly onto the nightstand. "shit. how should i save your page?"
"there's a bookmark in the book! use it! han jisung, if you doggy-ear that page, i will fuck you up." you laughed loudly.
thankfully, tonight you had zero worries about minho catching you and jisung. he was working out with chan and then he had an hour and a half teaching private lessons for one of his students. he wouldn't be home until at least 8:45pm, and since it was like 6:30 you could probably sneak jisung out by 8:20pm and get a twenty-five minute grace period to make it look like nobody had been over. life was good.
all of a sudden, jisung gave you a devilish grin, and positioned himself so he could easily climb on top of you.
"ji, what are you doing?" you asked with a chuckle, reaching up to caress his soft face.
"givin' you lots of kisses, duh." he leaned down to brush his soft lips against yours, and you wrapped your arms around his neck. the kiss grew more and more heated in a blink of an eye. it happened so fast. one second he was giving you gentle kisses, like the touch of a fairy, and the next his tongue was in your mouth dancing with yours.
he pulled away after a very long makeout session, a string of saliva connecting your lips to his raw, swollen ones. he licked them with a smile, and shifted a bit so he could lean down and press wet, open-mouthed kisses along your neck, shoulders, and collarbone. you almost groaned at the sensation, but covered your mouth with one hand. jisung giggled at this.
"you don't need to hide those pretty noises, babe. nobody can hear us. we're alone." he snickered, before resuming his work kissing and sucking on your neck until your skin was littered with baby bruises the color of cherries. thankfully, jisung wasn't an idiot, so he only left marks in places you could easily cover with concealer or hide with your shirt.
to him, you were ethereal in this position, pressed into your bed. lips raw and parted in an "o" shape, hair splayed out in a halo around you, your chest heaving.
"you look debauched in the loveliest way possible, gorgeous." he grinned, his fingers now reaching down to the buttons of your shirt. "don't you feel embarrassed at all? i'm literally going down on you on your childhood bed."
you laughed breathily.
"shut up and kiss me again."
your response was cut short. you would have said something more, something almost provocative, if your door didn't open abruptly.
"hi, honey. i'm home early. my student was sick, so i'm gonna get started on dinner-" the scene was almost comical. you and jisung both turned your heads in slow motion to see minho standing there, a grocery bag in his hand and shock upon his face. "jisung. get the fuck off of them or i'll snap your neck."
jisung shot upright, cheeks beet red as he helped you up. minho noticed the marks on your skin instantly. he looked furious. you'd never seen your brother this way, ever.
"we have been friends for what- fourteen years? and what has been the recurring thing i have told you, time and time again?" minho hissed. jisung hung his head in shame.
"you said yn is off limits." he murmured. he slowly lifted his head to meet minho's eyes, searching for the tiniest speck of sympathy, but there was none there. "look- i can explain."
"what is there to explain, jisung?" minho snapped. "'oh, i always want what i can't have, so i'm gonna defile my best friend's sibling behind his back.'"
"min, that's not what happened." you tried. no luck. "i confessed to him first. if anything, it was me. not him. don't take this out on him just because you won't take it out on me."
"don't even say anything. i don't want to hear a single word out of you. everything i do is to protect you! i've looked out for you our entire lives. i...i love you immensely and endlessly, yn. that much is true. but i can't allow this. i wouldn't want to lose jisung because of something you did or something he did to you. and i wouldn't want to lose you because you're so hurt by someone like him." minho's voice broke. he was done. he sighed, and stormed off.
you turned to stare at jisung.
"i, um, think you should go." you murmured, wrapping your arms around him and kissing his cheek. his toned arms made their way around your waist, and he hugged you tightly.
"okay. text or call me if you need anything. let's figure this out tomorrow."
you were with jisung. you loved him so much. but what was the cost of loving him?
friday
minho wouldn't speak to you.
he left for chan's before you woke up, sending you a brief text telling you where he was. you opened the fridge to see a plate stowed aside for you, a sticky note with your name on it on top. huh. even though he was mad, he still went out of his way to make breakfast for you.
you knew you were in the wrong. it wasn't okay of you to sneak around behind minho's back, but if he was too petty to talk to you, then it'd be hopeless.
after eating, you called jisung. he picked up on the first ring, like he always did whenever you called.
"minho won't text me back. he's leaving me on read. god, he's petty when he's mad." his voice sounded a bit gravelly, meaning he'd probably just woken up. you hoped your call didn't serve as an alarm for him.
"i feel bad, ji." you murmured, flopping down onto the couch. the cats sensed your discomfort and padded over to you, rubbing against your legs and purring to try and get you to relax. "i know he would've been mad either way, but do you think he would've been less of a dickhead if we'd just been up front about it?"
"i guess. i'm embarrassed i suggested we keep it a secret. but what's past is past. now, we've got to figure something out. i love you, but he's my best friend of fourteen years. and i love him, but i've been madly in love with you since i was a kid. i don't want to lose either of you."
you smiled fondly at his sweet words. sometimes, he always knew the right thing to say to put you at ease.
"when he gets home, i'm going to talk to him. i'll text you how it goes." as you were saying this, the front door opened and he stood there, looking at you with a cold expression. you wanted to cry. "speak of the devil, he just got home. i love you, bye." you hung up, feeling absolutely powerless. but you weren't defeated yet. you still had your words.
"min," you began. "now that we've blown off some steam since last night, can we talk? jisung and i care so much about you, and neither of us want to lose you."
you followed him to his room, where you sat down on the bed beside him. he was not too enthusiastic.
"well, you shouldn't have jeopardized that by fucking my best friend." minho replied solemnly. you were infuriated.
"i haven't fucked him at all, min. don't jump to conclusions. besides, we haven't even been dating for two weeks. see, the reason we were hanging out so much is because he was helping me with a this sort of- bucket list that i had, of date ideas. and i didn't get the chance to do them with my ex, so i did them with him." you explained. minho was listening, thankfully. "and then, i realized i had feelings deep down for him i'd been harboring since i was younger. and i couldn't keep them in anymore, so i told him. and he told me he'd been in love with me since i met him."
minho nodded, his eyes still untrustworthy.
"okay. how much do you love him?" he asked.
"i love him so much it hurts to see this happening. you're his best friend and he's suffering without you. he was texting me, complaining all night. and no, i know what you're going to ask. i don't love him more than you. romantic love and familial love are on two very different ends of the spectrum."
minho was silent for a moment, reaching out to take your hand.
"i'm sorry for acting this way. i'm sorry for punishing you with silence. i've watched you grow up from a little kid with big round cheeks to the successful, loving person you are today. when you broke up with your last boyfriend, it took everything in me not to go fucking kill the guy for breaking your heart. but this, this is different. jisung is my best friend. i love him so much, and i don't know what i'd do with myself if he ever hurt you. if anybody i cared about hurt you." you gave your brother a tight hug, and he wrapped you in his arms.
"i understand. but we both know jisung isn't that kind of person."
"and you," minho whispered, and you barely caught it. "will you promise not to break his heart? i'll...i'll think about getting behind this if you do."
"i promise. i swear on my life."
that night, you lay in the grass once more with jisung, staring up at the stars. his arm was wrapped tightly around you as you pointed out various constellations with a jubilant look upon your face. god, you were adorable. he rolled you over slightly so he could press a loving kiss to your lips.
the sky was clear, the clouds pushed away to reveal an angelic array of twinkling lights, set against an ebony blackdrop.
"you can see the stars tonight." you whispered gleefully. jisung laughed.
"you can, can't you? they're really beautiful. just like you said. just being here with you brings me eternal solace." he brought your hand to his lips and softly kissed each of your knuckles. "i love you, to the moon and to saturn."
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