Dec 14, 2020
Maybe there is no way of healing or recovery for me. Too many traumas, pains, sufferings have overlapped and I am not even willing to make any attempts anymore to overcome them. The will to fight and survive is dying and I can feel it seeping in slowly and occupying my consciousness. I loved this life with all my heart and the people who came close. Yet, I was always unloved by life and never felt belonged to anyone or anything. It somehow feels like the last chapter has begun. There is nothing more to look forward. I just need to wrap things up. If I don’t, this struggle, this suffering, this loneliness will continue and continue till God knows when. I need to close the shutters as soon as possible.