"The Sand of Canaan" by Budapest, Hungary-based gothic experimental project Redeye Black Tears off of 2025 debut album Cuddling Monsters

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"The Sand of Canaan" by Budapest, Hungary-based gothic experimental project Redeye Black Tears off of 2025 debut album Cuddling Monsters
chicago - 2025.
i didn’t think that i would share my more experimental and goth looks on this account, but after spending the last few months thinking about my creative image, i decided that the southern gothic white fields and more traditional gothic silver crosses parts of my creative identity feed into each other in mutual exchange, so it would be limiting to my artistic expression to only share one curated peace here. i hope you all enjoy the balance.
i think the song old money compliments this post in an unexpected way. i did grow up in an upper middle class family, i won’t lie about that or try to hide it, but the area i grew up in unfortunately lacked alternative forms of expression. my middle school had one emo girl who only wore hot topic disney dresses and even that got her bullied enough to turn normal. my high school had no real emos or goths to speak of either. i didn’t begin exploring alternative fashion and expression until the Covid-19 pandemic and lockdowns, which were obviously catastrophic for public health and wellbeing, but also served as a catalyst for personal growth. many people look back at that era of fashion as cringe-worthy, and while it did glorify microtrends and over consumption, it also encouraged personal experimentation. being trapped at home with nothing to do but go online led me to amazing alternative spaces and ultimately watered the little emo seed that i think i always had within me. all of this is to say that while i love alternative fashion and expression, there is still a side of me that grew up in that comfortable, east bay area, white upper-middle class, but still i was able to find my own form of expression that exists at odds with the expectations of my home environment. i love the harshness of the gothic looks and alternative aesthetics, but i also have that quiet boy inside me who wants nothing more than a peaceful and quiet life of suburban placidity. when you call for me baby i’ll run run run, and i want to be called for in my black wig and face paint. i want to be beautiful, and at the same time scary. black beauty is another song that really resonates with me for similar reasons, though i just have to ignore the real message of the song (LOL). all in all, i want to keep being weird, but i want to experience the love and devotion that seems to demand normalcy and conformity. but that’s just my cross to bare with all the crosses i wear.
The title track off of 2022 album Locusta by Rennes, France-based self-declared queer feminist experimental goth duo Maalice
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