August 10th Update: Dad Is The Worst >:c
So. Update. And it's a bad one.
I accidentally left two lights on. Dad told me to turn them off. I was in the middle of a severe mood swing and yelled back by accident. That turned into an argument where he called me lazy, I yelled I wasn't, and suddenly my laptop is gone for two weeks as punishment.
He said he won't feed me at home for those two weeks and told grandma not to either — all because I told him I wouldn't talk to him for two weeks. And the reason I said that is because he took away my main coping mechanism. So he punished me for reacting to his punishment. Cool logic 💀 (Sarcastic)
(At one point, I was so upset and desperate that I actually considered going outside during the heat advisory just to stay out there and suffer heat exhaustion (just to clarify, definitely not as suicide). My goal was to show him how much I’m really suffering so he'd finally feel sorry and apologize. I didn't end up doing it, but only because while calling my mom, she told me it wouldn't make him feel guilty at all. I’m really distressed and upset right now over the whole thing :c)
I left the house this morning because I couldn't stand being there and spent the day at college instead. Came home sweating, weak, stomach hurting from the heat and hunger. It was bad.
Grandma, to her credit, fed me tonight and was genuinely concerned I hadn't eaten. She earns a W even if she also scolded me for "provoking him." The lady stayed neutral and didn't pile on, which is the most I can ask from her right now.
For the next two weeks I'll be using school and library computers since my laptop is gone, and staying out of the house until grandma gets home in the evenings. Surviving mode activated 💀
I'm very exhausted and angry and really tired of this.
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