@nropay asked OUAT/ Enchanted crossover + “what the hell is happening?”
Robert was no stranger to guests from fairytale lands. Nancy came often, her husband in tow, and a few of Edward’s more curious subjects had braved the portal, with one or two having decided to settle in New York.
Giselle greeted all with a welcoming smile, no matter their status or how eccentrically they behaved.
Which explained why, when his wife tensed and turned white, staring at the man that Henry had introduced as his grandfather a few minutes before, Robert was immediately alert. “Giselle?”
“She called him Rumpelstiltskin,” Giselle whispered, pointing between the man and his wife before she clutched onto his arm and led him away toward the kitchen. “Just now. I heard her. Do you know what this means?”
He vaguely remembered a tale where straw was made into gold. Having helped the Andalasians pick a surname for their lives in this world, he appreciated the inside joke of this Rumpelstiltskin’s choice. “That the only wonder is that they aren’t richer?”
Giselle frowned, at a loss as to his reasoning. She never cared about things like that. “What? No. I thought he’d be a cursed prince - we have lots of those, you know. Most of them make perfectly nice beasts, very sweet and polite.”
The reminder of the Golds having a literal fairytale romance didn’t faze him. His first date with Giselle had included dragons and True Love’s kiss, so he just wished the other couple a less dramatic story.
However, he doubted that at any point Mr. Gold had been particularly sweet or polite. Years of work alongside cutthroat lawyers gave Robert the impression that any niceties that man showed were a calculated choice. He said none of that. He liked that Giselle was an optimist about people, and people often rose to her expectations in a subconscious dislike of disappointing her.
His wife made the world a brighter place, so he struggled to understand her sudden wariness. “Is something wrong, dear?”
Giselle nodded emphatically. “Of course! Henry says he used to be his mother’s mentor. I thought he meant Emma, because the information Chip has gathered mentions only one person who taught magic to Queen Regina - and Henry is such a good boy! He can’t possibly be related to him!”
“Taught magic to…” Robert put the pieces together. “You mean, like an evil… witch. Wizard?”
He tried to imagine something worse than a dragon trying to eat him. His brain gave a little shriek and refused to walk along that path. “Worse than Narissa?” he asked anyway, drawing in a sharp breath when his wife nodded. “Giselle, what the hell is happening? Who is this man?”
“I think he’s the Dark One,” Giselle said, her voice thin with fear. She shook her head when the overrated villain title failed to make an impact on him. “He’s bad. Even the ogres are scared of him!”
That last remark had the opposite result to what Giselle had intended.
An ogre had once hunted her. Edward had told him about that after a few beers, years ago.
Robert’s regard of Mr. Gold rose considerably even if the picture of a creature thirty feet tall, cowering from the man in his living room, found no foothold in his mind’s eye. Maybe he beats them up with his cane, he thought and bit his lip so he wouldn’t snicker.
Giselle noticed. “You’re not taking me seriously, Robert,” she told him, eyes wide with hurt.
“I’m sorry.” He grabbed her hands. “I am listening, and knowing my luck, yes, Morgan’s new friend is the grandson of Merlin’s evil twin.” He rolled his eyes to express his disbelief at the madness his life had become, to which Giselle responded with an unsure smile. “But all I see is a guy who is uncomfortable in a social occasion, but all the same agreed to come along when Morgan invited them for dinner and has answered our daughter’s questions without losing his patience at her pestering - and, yes, she’s been pestering both him and Mrs. Gold.” He bent down to kiss Giselle’s forehead. “I would hate meeting him on court as opposing counsel, but right now I just want to offer him a beer and get advice on how to make Morgan understand that she can’t have a unicorn.”
“…you believe me, don’t you?”
“Of course. If he so much as tries to conjure a penny from behind your ear, I’ll have words with him,” he promised, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “But so far his best trick has been blending with the furniture, and he’s failed in every attempt. Believe me,” he said with a little smirk, “he is more wary of getting a goodbye hug from you, than you ever could be of him.”
Gisselle’s lips quirked up minutely. She drew back her shoulders, allowing her natural positive attitude to reassert itself. “You think that now he’s… good?”
“So far I’ve seen an indulgent grandfather, a devoted husband, and a happily expectant father.” Robert smiled. “Chip’s doing his best, but all his information is decades out of date. I know nothing about wizards, but I can recognize a fellow family man when I meet one. Just give him a chance, okay?”
Giselle stared at him, her expression a mixture of disbelief and tenderness. “You have been listening to me.”
“No, I mean-” She took his hand into a tender grasp, lifting it to her lips to kiss his knuckles. “There was a time you wouldn’t have trusted a stranger so easily.”
Robert felt his cheeks pink at the pride in her voice. “Well. You’ve been a good influence,” he managed, and wasn’t surprised when his wife threw her arms around him.
“You’re a good man, Robert Phillip,” she said into his ear, dropping a quick kiss on his cheek. “I’m so happy that you’re mine!”
“I’m happy to be yours,” he told her, and taking advantage of the privacy they wouldn’t recover until their guests had left, he bent his head and kissed her properly.
