#fearvsfaith

[mizdriverjames-blog]

3/13/2023 #universesays Growth is uncomfortable. Break out of your comfort zone. #fearvsfaith #trust #blessings https://www.instagram.com/p/Cpu0B4SMwFG/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[shamansara]

When we move with FAITH we move with courage, strength, grace and the knowing that what we want is just on the other side of the hurdle. We have a knowing that whatever is happening to us is a reflection of our thoughts and emotions or of the collective and we also have the power to change it with Faith. ⁣ 
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When we move with FEAR, we project powerlessness and doubt. We lose our trust in the Divine and most importantly in ourself. After all we are created in the image and likeliness is the Divine, God himself.⁣
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That power is always within you. The stamp of Divinity was placed on your heart from beginning of time, you have access to it 24 7. Just place your hand on your heart and take a couple of deep breaths and connect with the source of your FAITH. 🙌🏼⁣ 
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#fearvsfaith #faithvsfear #shamanicjourney #healyourself #mindthoughts #changeyourworld
https://www.instagram.com/p/B_iC00cHlge/?igshid=12l3z9ammbmmn

[beautifulllyrewritten]

What is driving your fear?? . . . . #fearvsfaith #beautifullyrewritten #faith #faithoverfear #coronavírus #quarantine #biblestudy #followerofchrist #biblicalwomanhood (at Dallas, Texas) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-egyMnl50c/?igshid=1rwuc6q2m0nfw

[colemanateyourlife]

Happy Hump Day!!! Don't waste your time worrying about what's next!!! Channel your energy into prayer!!! God is a respecter of faith!!! GO ahead and start making faith moves!!!! Have a wonderful day! #dontworrypray #prayerispowerful #makeyourfaithmove #faithmoves #fearvsfaith #colemanateyourlife

[mommarennick]

Fear vs. Faith

In my last post I talked about reconciliation. Reconciliation with things in life that we go through that are outside of our control, things that we never saw coming.

At 12 days of age my sweet, fragile, innocent and beautiful daughter ended up in the hospital with an unknown infection. When an infant shows up at the ER with a fever, a myriad of things happen because our little ones cant communicate their symptoms. 1) Monitors were immediately placed on her small little body 2) blood is taken which can consist of a heel prick and squeeze or needle straight to the arm 3) straight catheter to collect a urine sample 4) an IV is placed and in our case it had to be placed in her perfect soft baby smelling head. Yep, you read that right, IV in the head and last but not least..... 5) a lumbar puncture. Needle in the spine to collect spinal fluid... on an infant, a baby.... my baby. This was the longest night of my life.

From the moment I got pregnant, I was plagued with fears of losing my pregnancy. I had been through a previous miscarriage and I didn’t want to relive that. From day 1, for me it was my fear vs. my faith. The faith that I have doesn’t always say “I have faith that nothing bad will happen to me” but rather “I have faith that whatever happens to me, it is happening for a reason and God will make it all right”. But that type of faith is not easy or comfortable, especially when it comes to something that I wanted and already loved more than I could EVER imagine! So when I gave birth to a beautiful health baby the fear turned from losing the pregnancy, to something bad happening to my child, something that I can not protect her from, and isn’t that exactly what happened.

When the ER doctor did the lumbar puncture the spinal fluid came out cloudy when it is supposed to be clear (we later find out from a pediatrician that infants don’t always have clear fluid). The ER doctor was convinced that it was some type of infection and we were admitted for 48 hours, that is how long it would take for any cultures to come back. So we waited, with no answers for 48 hours, thinking our sweet angel had an infection of her spinal fluid. She was immediately started on antibiotics so that if she did have an infection they were treating it already.

During this time I was a wreck, of course. Holding it together on the outside, trying to be regal and strong but on the inside I was full of rage, fear and confusion. 32 hours had passed and our girl was doing very well. All levels were trending down like they were supposed to and that morning the pediatrician notified us that the cultures had not grown anything and the chances were less than 1% that they would moving forward!! Turns out she just had a viral infection that had to run its course.

So I ask myself why did we have to go through this? Why as a brand new parent who had just recovered from birth back in the hospital. In these types of situations we can either embrace the challenge and recognize that it will create in us character and perseverance, or remain angry and bitter. Well, I chose to be angry, bitter and afraid.

After she was born I had no trepidation about people coming over, holding and loving on her!  After she was in the hospital I put all walls up, no one in and no one out! There’s no way that I’m going to let this happen to her again, I thought. But who can live like that? In a constant state of alert, fear and mistrust. At a certain point I didn’t go outside for 2 weeks.

There has got to be a line, and I’m still searching for it, between being cautious, and wise and having faith in God and he has power to protect my daughter better than I ever could. It is still flu season so that comes with special considerations, but every day I am working through my anxieties surrounding my daughter. Speaking with a friend today, she reminded me that James 1 talks about embracing the trials we are given, and Psalm 91 talks about God protecting us with his legion of angels. I don’t know about you but it is a little bit of a relief knowing that I don’t have to work so hard on things I really have no control of at the end of the day.