Lol why is it that commitment feels scary? Just cause I’m the worst? Or other people are?

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Lol why is it that commitment feels scary? Just cause I’m the worst? Or other people are?
Mood. . . . . . . . #blob #eyes #lowbrowart #weirdart #doodles #sketchbook #surrealism #darksurrealism #penandink #blackandwhite #scopophobia #creepyart #feelingweird #emerging #melting #horrorart https://www.instagram.com/p/BsmfO09BoJp/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1hg0czhnh8kln
I am so weird sometimes. Like, I have the feeling that people sometimes look at me like I am a weirdo in the edges of society trying to adjust. Even tough I am nearly 30 (and have a life and a job etc).
First day of moving on. Spent P320.00 for a Signature massage alone. After an hour, I bought myself an Aficionado perfume, my favorite. Spent another hundred for bread, a local hot chocolate drink (sikwate), and proven (a local street food as well). It was hard finding a ride home even at 8 pm because of the rainy weather. Curfew is at 10 in the evening. For some reason, two different strangers asked me what time it was and a strange looking guy called a motorcycle shouting to let me take a ride. Anyways, I'm enjoying my warm cup of choco in my comfy bed while listening to chill music! Doing fine so far. 🤍😆
(b07gem)
Day 17 in Lockdown. I’ve been too busy in the garden to make photos, just been a busy bee. It’s so healing to be with your hands in the ground..feeling grounded is a magic feeling and being me, that means and feels a lot. 🙃But than it made me stare into space too, as ‘is this all real ? ‘.. What the F*^^^ ? And the first thought came up with questioning myself ‘when am I able to fly again?’ Is this all a joke!?? Big question mark !? #covid19 #newzealand #feelingweird #vegetarian #beans @ingetje_tadros (at Glenduan, New Zealand) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-1Vn9XA_9w/?igshid=kajfhgc9ta0l
Can i just like...fly away?
And never come back?
Or just for a few moments? Days? Weeks?
i cant make up my mind if i like a guy or not and i keep going back and forth and its so unfair to him because everyone tells me he was like depressed over an entire summer because of the way i told him i didnt want to be together and then i got together with one of his close friends who ended up being a dick which led me back to my guy and its such a mess and now i think hes getting over me but i keep lookink back at our conversations and wondering if i messed up