they call you clingy on tour : maknae line ( part two )
➪ pairing : skz maknae line x reader
➪ summary : a continuation to part one. your boyfriend regrets how awful he treated you and now grovels to have you forgive him, you however remain hurt by him.
➪ other notes : LAWD THIS TOOK WAY TOO LONG but i’m glad that it’s done now. all endings are purposefully done like this, no part three will be made !
ੈ✩ synopsis: after seeing a guy at a house party, Felix gets a bit overly jealous and clingy
ੈ✩ word count: 2.4k
ੈ✩ photos credits: Pinterest
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊ *ੈ
Hiiii managed to write this on a plane back home with severe as fuck delays so thank Air France I guess……
Finally managed to put together that clingy fic
Enjoy !!!!!
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊ *ੈ
—————————————————————————
If you were being completely honest with yourself, your top was immediately uncomfortable the moment you put it on. You wiggled around in it a little more in the mirror at the bottom of your apartment. Nope, still uncomfortable as fuck. All the straps in the wrong place. It was just as you were frowning at yourself that you saw Felix behind you in the mirror.
“What’s wrong?”, he asked in a higher toner with a bit of a pout.
“Nothing”, you sighed, still shifting the top around your shoulders, “I should probably at least wear this once”
Felix gave a rub of both of your shoulders, and met your eyes in the mirror before collapsing into you. His hands linked all the way around your waist, face buried in your neck.
“You look so pretty tonight though”, he mumbled into your shoulder, rubbing his chin in the crease of your neck.
You were a little surprised by the sudden sulkiness and gave him a soft pat of his head.
“It’s not fair”, he added a little quieter
“What’s not fair?”, you asked, a little too worried given the response he was about to give
“That I can’t have you all to myself tonight”
You gave a short giggle but he just wrapped his arms tighter around your waist.
“Clingy”, you retorted, poking his cheek playfully.
He just grumbled into your neck, “yeah whatever, still”.
“I’ve not seen you in a whole week and now we have to go out … it’s fucked up”
You just rolled your eyes and looked at him buried in your neck still. You were silent until he looked up at you, locks falling over his face with his deep doey brown eyes.
You gave him a brief kiss on his forehead, “you act like you won’t see me at all tonight”, speaking to him through the mirror.
“And anyways, it’s just me and you tomorrow, and the day after that”, you reasoned.
“Yeah…”, he sighed.
You just smiled and looked at your phone. The uber had pulled up outside your apartment.
—
The uber dropped you an annoyingly long distance from your friend’s apartment because of roadworks, leaving you to walk in the cold. You secretly hoped there weren’t too many people there tonight, and that your entire year hadn’t been invited. You were way too tired for that already, having just gotten back home earlier that day.
You picked up the pace to get out of the cold. Felix just followed close behind you in silence, his warm hand placed on your bare lower back.
You smiled at your friend and gave her a long hug when she opened the door. The warmth of the room was a relief, even if it was a little stuffy already. Felix gave a polite smile and a nod before being surprised with a hug too. He was still so polite and quiet around all your friends despite the fact they were more than entirely comfortable with him.
You gave a quick glance over of the room. A sea of people. You gave a deep breath in to prepare yourself for at least a few hours of extrovertedness.
Your friend waved you over to pour your drink and you smiled back before hearing Felix behind you.
“Hey baby”, he started
You turned around to meet his eyes. There was a slight timidity in his voice that you didn’t hear that often.
“Can we maybe stick together tonight?”
His gaze had already floated off behind you.
“Uhh yeah sure, sunshine, if you want”. You took one of his fingers and started playing with it to get his attention.
You’d both thought earlier that you’d probably get separated, having different people to catch up with.
You didn’t grab his attention, and after a second of silence, you followed his gaze all the way to the back of the room.
A guy stood in a tank top and jean shorts. Holding a cup and speaking to two others with their backs turned. You gave sigh, mentally flinging your arms in the air.
It was the guy who’d drunkenly confessed he liked you a year ago. Felix, let’s say, wasn’t the fondest of him. The guy didn’t know you had a boyfriend and had apologised profusely (hungover). Apparently he’d had other partners since then, not that that would matter.
You’d actually managed to have a civil conversation with him since as well, trying to keep the peace with a friend of a friend. That didn’t mean that Felix’s face didn’t drop the few times his name was mentioned.
You turned back to Felix and gripped his hand a little tighter. You looked at him with a combination of “really?” and reassurance. He looked back at you with that same pout, and a slight added annoyance in his eyes.
“You know nothings gonna happen right? He knows full well all about you”. You attempted reassurance.
Felix groaned in response, physically squirming a little.
“Yeah but you know if I see you two talking together alone I might actually explode”
You were about to tell him off for the possessiveness, but something in his eyes was a bit too sincere, and it stopped you in your tracks.
You looked down at your joint hands, and gave his a soft rub. You thought about it for a second in silence before pressing your lips into a silenced smile.
You looked up at him again, “We can stay together if you really want, Lixie?”
“I wouldn’t want you to be worried all night”.
But by the time you finished, he was looking down at your hands with a slightly different expression.
He pressed his lips together, shut his eyes and shook his head. His freckles were so visible from that angle, painted over his nose and onto his cheeks.
“No, that’s ok princess”, he started, now looking up at you earnestly, “you go say hi to your friends, sorry for being ridiculous”
“Don’t be silly”, you replied, cupping his face with your right hand, “you’re not ridiculous”, you said with a pout of your own. You didn’t like him putting himself down in any circumstance.
He gave a short shrug of his shoulders and a smile before kissing your cheek as you left to pick up your drink.
—
It had been a couple hours. And you were happy enough to break away to pour a drink by the now emptied kitchen. Everyone had moved to other rooms or to catch some air.
You turned to the cabinet and hadn’t noticed Felix enter the room, smiling at the sight of you. He snuck within reach before saying anything.
“Hey you”, he whispered in a deep tone, hugging you round the waist.
You yelped briefly in surprise before sighing in relief and clutching your top. He just giggled and left a kiss on your neck.
“I missed you”, he started, slowly rubbing your stomach in circles with his thumbs
“It’s been half an hour since I last saw you, angel”
“That doesn’t mean I didn’t miss you the whole time”, he replied
“Are you having fun, cupcake?”, he said, poking your cheek with a menacing grin.
“I am Lixie, are you?”, you responded, pouring some(?) spirit into your depleted cup.
“Mhm”, he responded, watching you pour your drink with his chin rested in the crook of your neck.
He turned to face you as you were pouring, making your ears turn red from embarrassment.
“It’s still not fair I can’t have my pretty girl all to myself though”
“Is that so”, you responded a little sarcastically, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t love it really.
“Well what about the fact I have to share you with other people tonight as well”, you parried.
“Don’t even try it, cause you know I’ll stay clung to you all night”
—
After another half hour, Felix had gone outside to get some air with his coursemates, and you were mingled in a larger group.
Some left and some came, until it was just 5 of you. You, your friend, and 2 friends of friends. And then the guy, who joined last.
You acted as normal as possible, and it was fairly natural. There wasn’t really a strange vibe, but also you knew you’d never be friends, even if Felix had no say in it.
Felix walked back through the door but stopped dead when he saw you and the guy through the small opening of the door.
He bit his lip for a second and furrowed his brow. He knew he should leave you, and it would be fine, but something in the pit of his stomach wasn’t letting him.
Like out of some ridiculous movie, you said something that the guy laughed at and then smiled at you, just as Felix entered the room.
He tried to keep a smile as he walked over to where you were standing. Before saying anything, he linked his hand around the small of your back.
You were slightly startled but just looked at him, beaming back at you with crescent eyes. The conversation continued without you as you spoke.
“Hey”
“Hi”, you responded, happy he seemed happy
“I just wanted to check you’re ok”, he asked seemingly earnestly.
“Yeah of course baby”, you responded, wiping his cheek with you’re free hand, “let me introduce you”
You introduced Felix as your boyfriend to the group as he smiled widely and said hi. You knew he’d fit right in already.
After introducing him, you gave a rub of his hand at your back.
You talked about basically nothing for the next 15 minutes. Felix was a natural with people he didn’t know, so you were happy to take a bit of a back seat. Just admiring how talkative he was, the corners of his mouth turning up in a smile when he was half way through a story.
When he wasn’t speaking, he was slowly rubbing the right side of your hip with his thumb. Once or twice, he curled a stray lock behind your ear, looking at you with a beam when you spoke or sipped your drink like you were the most precious thing on earth.
What you didn’t notice was the way he’d stop rubbing your waist when the guy looked at you, and instead grip it, pulling you a millimetre closer. The corners of his lips turning into a frown if it was for so long. You laughed at one of his jokes, and he moved his other hand to rub your left shoulder and restrained a deep breath.
You just obliviously laid your head on his hand for a second.
Not after long, the 4 of them decided to go out and get some air. You both said bye to all of them, and you tried to peer at Felix’s expression towards the guy, but just about missed it.
The door closed and it was just the two of you left in the room.
Felix immediately groaned and buried his head in your neck once again, as if he was watching the door for the millisecond it closed.
“Hey what’s this about?”, you asked with your hands surrendered up, “nothing happened right?”
It was less of a question and more of a statement, but you left it open in the extreme off chance you hadn’t noticed something. Felix was way too good at noticing those type of things.
“Hmmm nothing”, he whined into you, pulling you close to him and sighing.
“Lixie?”, you asked in a higher tone as he rocked you gently side to side.
You ripped his face from your neck into your hands.
His face was bright red and he pouted as he refused to meet your eyes.
“Sunny…?”, you asked in a depleted whisper, your eyes begging to be met. At this point you were starting to convince yourself you’d missed something he’d done.
He heard your tone and snapped his eyes to yours. He was overly embarrassed, but he physically couldn’t ignore you when you spoke like that.
“Oh no it’s nothing it’s just…”, he started to reassure you, but stopped in his tracks
He rubbed your elbows in both his hands as he avoided eye contact again.
“He was smiling at you a lot”
He said it so quietly with an exaggerated pout you almost had to ask him to repeat.
“And laughing at you”
You realised just then that the redness in his face wasn’t entirely from jealousy, but at least half from his own embarrassment of being so bothered over small things.
He slapped his face in his hands and groaned again.
“This is so stupid”, he started. You grabbed his wrists near his face.
“And it’s not fair on you either…”. He held his cheeks in his fingers.
Any frustration of him worrying you for no reason evaporated from your body at the sight of his huge concerned eyes and furrowed brow. He was a little too concerned over his reaction.
You sighed and brought his hands down from his cheeks, tucking his hair behind his ears with both hands.
“I think it’s cute”.
It was probably the last thing he expected to hear but you weren’t lying either.
A part of you loved when his ears would turn red when explaining why a guy was ‘definitely flirting’ with you.
Or how he’d grab your cheeks and call you his precious girl after the same interaction, just to reinforce that you were still here and still completely his.
Although granted, you didn’t like seeing him this worried.
His eyes searched yours in slight disbelief. You just gave a smile in response.
“You’re so silly”, you said in honesty, “and you need to stop worrying”, you said a little more seriously.
You gave a kiss on both sides of his cheeks before continuing,
“But I think you’re so cute”.
He gave a long sigh with his eyes shut before cupping your face and leaving a lingering kiss on your lips.
“I’m working on it”, he said, half in jest.
You just giggled back at him.
He gave a content smile with a tilted head, the anxiety visibly leaving his body.
You left it a second before speaking again.
“I love you so much, you know that right?”, you continued as he ran his fingers through the front of your hair, nothing but adoration in his eyes.
“I know princess, I love you more”
You could’ve just stood there in his eyes and his hands forever, but sound of feet on stairs slapped you back to reality. And the heat of the room you were in.
“I think I’m gonna grab some air…?”, you left the idea open.
He bit his lip before responding, “I’m coming with you”, gripping your hand and leading you to the door.
*synopsis: When a mutual friend sets you up with a new roommate, you expect quiet, low-key company — not Hyunjin, a stunningly handsome model with a reputation for being a charming and flirty. At first, you try to keep your distance(barely), focused on your studies and convinced that someone like him is out of your league.
not proof read
wc:11.7k
-
You were recently kicked out of your apartment, which you had lived in for quite a while. Well, ever since you started your first year of college. The landlord kicked you out just because you were late on rent one time. Let's just say there was a time when you struggled to make money and be the top student in all your classes. You never thought you had the looks, so you focused on what you could control: your grades, your discipline, your mind.
You mentioned to one of your good friend, Felix, what was happening to you just to vent. But to your surprise, he said he could help, but he just would have to see. But you learned not to look forward to what other people say. Since the only thing people know how to do is let you down. So you brushed what he said off, but still thanked him.
You then went on with your life and made sure you had enough money saved up so you could stay afloat. One day, while studying, Felix hit up on messages.
Felix: Hey y/n, good news
I found you a new roommate. Chill guy. Travels a lot. Kinda quiet. You'll barely notice he's there.
y/n: Omg thank you so much Lix, you're a lifesaver
Felix: No problem, you deserve it, you've always been there for me. You know me being a social butterfly, I know a lot more people than you think. ;)
Y/n: still, thank you
You smile as you think to yourself, this is a perfect match. You needed quiet since you had a lot of work to do daily. Socializing wasn't really your thing, so this was great. You didn't need any distraction right now.
-
Over the weeks, you start packing your belongings to get ready to move in. Then the realization hits you that you don't even know what this person looks like. But you think about Felix and how he wouldn't do you wrong and give you a creep. But you had a date set for when you were gonna move on, since Felix talked to you about it in the past. The date was June 7th, and today was that day. You decided to not ask for any help since Felix had done more than enough for you.
You had a car which was enough space to fit all the stuff that you had. You decided to put your furniture in a locker, so if you need it for in the future, you could always get to it again. When all the stuff was packed, you started driving to the address.
You were nervous to meet the person who was your roommate, so you hoped the person wasn't there. After like 20 minutes you made if. To your surprise, it was a new complex, it looked like it was made for celebrities in a way. You decided to ask the employees for help to move in, and they said they have it all covered. You said thank you and gave them all your stuff to take up, with the apartment number. In the meantime, you walked to the elevator and pressed the button to go inside. You pressed the button 39 since the apartment was 3901. You took a breath and waited for the elevator to stop.
The elevator doors opened, and you saw the door on the left. You walked to it and got the key from under the mat just like Felix discussed with you. You unlocked the door and saw a neat space. The apartment was nicer than expected. The place smells like laundry detergent and a really nice candle that you couldn't buy.
Just liked that you hoped your new roommate isn't home yet. You glance around and see a note on the fridge.
"Kitchen's yours, I don't cook, Room on the left is yours, Welcome." Signed: H
Just as you read it, the bell rings. You sprint to the door and look through the peephole and see your things on a cart by an employee. You open the door and take your things, sparing a smile for the worker when you're done. You close the door and start taking your things over to the room on the left. You open the door and fall in love with the view that's in your room. The window goes along the wall that you love.
The place had everything it needed, except food. As you were about to get some, the door started to open. You quickly turn around and run to the couch to avoid the awkwardness of crossing paths so quickly. You act like you were busy when the door fully opens. So you don't turn your head right away.
" Hi, I'm Y/n, you're new roommate." You flash a warm smile as you turn around.
Silence.
Until a smooth laugh comes out of H's face. You finally look at him, and you stop breathing.
The guy standing in the doorway is tall, stupidly attractive, hair growing from a buzzcut, wearing a black hoodie and sweatpants that should not look that good on a human being. He has rings on his fingers and cheekbones that belong in a museum.
He leans a hip against the wall, one brow raised. “You’re... Y/N?”
Ouch he sounds dissapointed did I not meets his standards. you think
He walks in, slow and confident like someone who’s used to being looked at. You try very hard not to. It doesn’t work.
“I’m Hyunjin,” he says, offering a hand.
You shake it, briefly forgetting how hands work. “Cool. Okay. Yeah. I mean, nice to meet you. Wow, that was loud. Sorry.”
He grins, clearly entertained. “No worries.”
You clear your throat and gesture vaguely at your boxes. “Just unpacking. Not stealing anything. Yet.”
That earns another soft laugh.
He glances around. “Guess Felix didn’t tell you who I was?”
You squint. “Should he have?”
He tilts his head, still smiling. “Probably not. Makes this more fun.”
You frown. “You’re not, like… secretly a serial killer, right? Or worse, someone who leaves dishes in the sink for three days?”
He chuckles. “Guess you’ll have to find out.”
You stare after him, already dreading your Google search later. Because now you really want to know what kind of person you just moved in with and why your heart won't stop doing weird gymnastics.
" Well, I'm off to my room. See you then." You get up and give him a smile before leaving him in the kitchen.
You walk to your room pretending to be fine, but on the inside, you're dying. You open the door and crack it just because. You take your laptop and search for Hynjin on Google. You instantly regret it.
Top Results:
- Vogue Korea
"Hwang Hyunjin Is the New Face of Modern Masculinity — And He’s Not Sorry About It"
“With his striking visuals and fluid fashion sense, Hyunjin is redefining what it means to be a male model in a hyper-curated industry...”
Oh, so he's legit, I mean, look at that face even with his hair short. You then scroll to find his Instagram. You don't really use apps, but you know Instagram is big for models for there own platform.
You click to see:
Instagram: @ hynjinnnn
5.2M followers l Following 5k
Bio: nothing
You roll your eyes.
Of course. He has to be a big model.
You must've been so focused on studying that you don't even care for social media. I mean, you don't have any time anyway with the intense studying you do.
after a while of the high of him you realize you still have to study and focus.
-2 hrs pass time (11:30)
You decided to finally leave your room for some water. You get up and hurry to the kitchen.
You were never great when it came with men. Except Felix he was basically your brother. But being the extremely odd individual you are, conversations didn’t really go well and it always ended being awkward.
You poured the water from the fridge and drunk up. You look up to see Hyunjin looking at you.
“ What do you do on your free time?” He asks out the blue.
“ I study and…That’s about it,” you tell him, reminding yourself that you’re just a boring person.
“You look like it,” he mumbles. But you catch it, you knew you “weren’t” the prettiest but hearing a person like him say just stung.
So without even saying anything you, excuse yourself to your room. Not that Hyunjin would even care. It’s hasn’t even been 24 hours of knowing him.
-
You woke up at your alarm clock. 5am, you remember going to sleep early to stop your insecurities from swallowing you alive. You rub your eyes and finally get out your bed. Headed to the bathroom you see someone is in there. That someone being Hyunjin because he’s now your roommate. You were about to knock until the door opened.
Hyunjin steps out, towel slung low around his waist, hair damp and messy like he just dragged his fingers through it instead of using a comb. Water beads at his collarbone, disappearing beneath the towel. He smells like clean soap and something expensive.
You freeze.
He freezes too — but only for half a second.
“Morning,” he says easily, eyes flicking to the clock on the wall. “Damn. You’re up early.”
You look anywhere but him. The wall. The floor. The light switch. Anything that is not him.
“Yeah. I, uh— I have class,” you mutter.
He hums, clearly amused. “At five?”
“No,” you snap a little too fast. Then you wince. “I just… like starting early.”
He raises an eyebrow. Cocky smile loading.
“Studying again?” he asks. “Shocking.”
You step back, giving him space to pass, but he doesn’t move right away. Instead, he says, " Oh, yeah today I'm going to be out all day. I have a shoot." You nod and then he proceeds to his room.
You go into the bathroom not forgetting to close the door. You splash water in your face to wake yourself up.
' Ok y/n you gotta pull yourself together.' you thought to yourself.
-In class
Your just packing up after class when you hear a girl mention hyunjin.
You’re just packing up your bag after class, sliding your notebook inside when the voice reaches you.
“Omg, have you seen Hyunjin’s new photos that just dropped? He looks so good.”
Your hand pauses on the zipperYou don’t turn around. You pretend you’re still focused, adjusting your books, but your ears are burning now, fully tuned in.
“I swear,” another girl adds, laughing, “that man could wear a trash bag and still break the internet.”
You swallow.
Of course he could.You finally sling your bag over your shoulder and stand, keeping your expression neutral as you walk past them. One of them is already scrolling through her phone, eyes wide, showing the screen to her friend.
You catch a glimpse without meaning to — black-and-white, sharp lighting, Hyunjin staring straight into the camera like he knows exactly what he’s doing to people.
Your chest tightens.
You keep walking.
Because this is exactly why you told yourself not to get distracted. This is his world — photoshoots, millions of people obsessing over his face, girls squealing over pictures that dropped an hour ago.
And you?
You’re just his roommate.
Later, when you get home, the apartment is quiet. His shoes are by the door, jacket tossed over the chair like always. Evidence of him everywhere, even when he’s not.
You drop your bag on the couch and head to the kitchen, telling yourself you don’t care.
But your phone betrays you.
You open Instagram.
And there it is.
Hyunjin, leaning against a wall, jaw sharp, gaze unreadable. The caption is empty. The likes are already in the hundreds of thousands.
You stare at the screen longer than you should.
Then you lock your phone and set it face down on the counter.
You don’t need this.
You grab a glass of water, take a breath, and remind yourself:
This is exactly why you keep your distance.
Because falling for someone who belongs to everyone else?
That’s a losing game.
-
Past midnight, the lock clicks and the door swings open.
“Y/N?” Hyunjin calls, his voice casual.
You stiffen, instinctively straightening your posture. “Uh… yeah. Still up,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady.
He steps in, tossing his jacket over a chair, hair perfectly styled, outfit sharp. You quickly look down at your notebook, pretending you’re absorbed in work, but your stomach twists a little.
“Oh, hey,” he says, noticing you. “Didn’t expect you’d be up.”
“Uh… yeah. Just… studying,” you manage, fumbling slightly with your pen. “You?”
“Came back from a shoot. Some of the photos dropped online today. People are… excited,” he says, glancing at you with a small, easy smile.
You nod, giving a quiet, awkward “Mm, okay,” your words sounding far more flat than you intend. You clear your throat and look down again, trying not to stare at him.
He leans against the counter, smirk tugging at his lips. “Late night study session, huh?”
“Yeah… something like that,” you mumble, glancing up briefly before returning your gaze to your notes. You don’t want to make this weird, and yet, somehow, it already is.
“Why are you so awkward? Loosen up, don’t worry, I don’t bite,” he says, smirking a little.
You freeze, fingers tightening around your pen. “I’m not… awkward,”
He shrugs, casually leaning against the counter, clearly unconcerned with your discomfort. “Mm. Maybe. You just… look like you’re trying really hard not to fall asleep or something.”
You blink, unsure how to respond, and glance back at your notes. “I… guess I’m just tired.”
“Sure,” he says with a small smile, then yawns exaggeratedly, as if the whole conversation isn’t worth his energy. “Anyway, I’m just grabbing a drink and crashing in my room. Don’t burn the place down while I’m gone.”
He walks past you, completely relaxed, barely acknowledging your presence beyond a casual nod.
You let out a quiet exhale, heart still racing for no reason you can explain. He doesn’t care about impressing you, doesn’t even notice you flustered — and somehow, that makes being around him even more awkward.
You mutter under your breath, adjusting your notebook like it’s a shield. Okay… just roommates. Nothing else. Totally fine.
But you can’t shake the uneasy feeling that living with someone like him is going to be… exhausting.
-1 month later
It’s been a month since you moved in, and somehow, living with Hyunjin has become… easy. You learned how to stopped being somewhat awkward with Hyunjin. Remembering the you would have to get over this stage plus it makes it so much easier when everything is normal. The apartment no longer feels like a shared space between strangers. You’ve unpacked almost all of your things, organized your side of the apartment exactly how you like it, and learned the small rhythm of coexisting with someone who has a completely different schedule from yours. Hyunjin still comes and goes on his own timetable — late nights after shoots, occasional early mornings if he’s got a project — but it doesn’t unsettle you anymore. You barely notice when he slips in, the apartment’s rhythm accommodating him as much as it accommodates you.
That night, you’re in the kitchen, quietly making yourself a snack. The hum of the fridge and the faint rustle of your notebook papers are the only sounds. You’ve grown used to the stillness, to the little routines that fill the apartment when it’s just you.
“Hey,” Hyunjin says casually, sliding in behind you. You glance over your shoulder. He’s leaning against the counter, a drink in hand, jacket slung carelessly over one arm. There’s an easy, natural look to him — the kind of presence that doesn’t demand attention, but inevitably draws it anyway.
“Hey,” you answer, popping a granola bar into your mouth. “Late night?”
“Yeah,” he shrugs, taking a sip from his drink. “Shoot ran long. You?”
“Just… studying,” you murmur, leaning against the counter. Not stiff, not awkward — just comfortable in the silence.
He smirks faintly. “You’ve been at this a while, huh?”
“Yeah,” you reply easily. “I’m used to it. Makes it easier to focus.”
He nods, glancing around the kitchen like he’s taking in the apartment as much as the night. There’s no expectation between you anymore. No tension hovering in the air. You can sit in the same space, do your own thing, and feel completely at ease. If he hums to himself or taps rhythmically on the counter, it doesn’t bother you. If you make a joke, he smirks. If you roll your eyes, he laughs quietly.
“Not as awkward as the first day, huh?” he teases lightly, leaning a little more casually against the counter.
You shrug, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Not really,” you say.
For the first time, living with Hyunjin doesn’t feel intimidating. It’s just… normal. Calm. Comfortable. You’ve learned how to exist around him without overthinking every word or gesture, and you’re realizing how much easier it makes your life.
He takes a casual sip from his drink, eyes scanning the room. “You’re definitely… easier to be around now,” he says, not in a flattering or flirty way — just matter-of-fact.
“Yeah,” you answer lightly. “I think we’ve figured out the whole roommate thing.”
He smirks, tossing his empty bottle into the sink. “Figured it out or just stopped caring?”
You grin faintly. “Maybe a little of both.”
The apartment feels like home now, and while you wouldn’t call it friendship exactly, there’s a rhythm to sharing this space with him that makes everything else — school, deadlines, life outside these walls — feel manageable. You can exist, quietly, comfortably, with Hyunjin around and not feel overwhelmed or awkward.
For the first time since moving in, it feels like the two of you are… in sync.
-
The apartment is dimly lit, soft shadows stretching across the walls. You feel warm, your heart pounding for reasons you can’t fully place. Hyunjin is there — too close, impossibly close — his usual calm and collected demeanor replaced with something more intense, more aware of every subtle movement you make.
“You’re not avoiding me this time,” he murmurs, voice low and husky, brushing just a fingertip along your arm. You freeze, pulse racing, a shiver running through you.
You want to pull back, want to protest, but the words catch in your throat. His eyes lock on yours, dark and unreadable, every glance heavy with something unspoken. You feel the heat of him near you, the tension building until it’s almost unbearable.
“Y/N…” he whispers again, leaning closer, so close you can feel the warmth of his breath. “Why do you keep yourself so distant… when you don’t have to?”
Your chest tightens, lips parting slightly, a flicker of defiance mixing with anticipation. “I… I don’t know,” you manage to murmur, barely audible, though your mind screams with a thousand unspoken truths.
He tilts his head, smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. “Hm… maybe you just like keeping me on edge,” he says, voice teasing yet loaded.
The room seems to shrink around you, the tension crackling in the air, magnetic, impossible to ignore. Every subtle touch, every glance, every barely-there movement is electric, a slow burn that threatens to ignite at any second.
Just as the tension reaches a breaking point — the moment that could change everything — a sharp beep from your alarm jolts you awake.
Your eyes fly open, heart racing, and the apartment is just as it was. Calm, quiet, distant. No lingering heat, no Hyunjin brushing against you — just the faint sunlight spilling through the blinds.
You sit up slowly, trying to steady your pulse, running a hand over your face. Just a dream… you think, even as a part of you aches at how real it had felt. The tension, the intensity, the simmering connection — all gone, but not forgotten.
Hyunjin’s subtle smirk, the low hum of his voice, the way the air had felt charged around him — it’s all tucked away in your memory, a lingering tease of what could be… or maybe never will.
The morning light filters softly through the blinds, but your chest feels tight. You’re still caught in the remnants of the dream — the way Hyunjin had been impossibly close, the heat, the tension, every word lingering in your mind. Your pulse is a little too fast, your thoughts a jumble.
You quietly get up, trying to shake it off, but the memory of the dream makes every movement feel heightened. Even the faintest sounds of the apartment — a cupboard opening, his soft footsteps — set your nerves on edge.
Hyunjin enters the room, casual as ever, coffee in hand. “Morning,” he says softly, smiling in that calm, effortless way that usually puts you at ease.
You glance up, forcing a neutral expression, but your cheeks betray you with a faint flush. “Morning,” you mumble, tone clipped, avoiding his eyes, fiddling with your hands.
He pauses, noticing something is… off. “Uh… you okay?” he asks, tilting his head, brow slightly furrowed. There’s no way for him to know your dream, no way for him to understand why your usual calm, collected self feels suddenly jittery.
“Mm, yeah,” you reply quickly, nodding, voice a little too clipped. You can feel the tension radiating from yourself, awkward and unintentional. You force your gaze to the window, pretending the sunlight is more interesting than the fact that Hyunjin is standing just a few feet away.
He shifts slightly, giving you a subtle, curious glance. “You’re… different this morning,” he says carefully, still smiling but with a hint of genuine concern.
You clear your throat, forcing yourself to relax. “Just… tired,” you say softly, vague and neutral. Not a lie, but not the whole truth either.
Hyunjin gives a slow nod, eyes flicking to you for a moment longer, then he sips his coffee, trying to ignore the subtle shift in your energy. The tension hangs thick, awkward, unspoken, and he has no idea why.
Meanwhile, your mind quietly catalogues the dream, your pulse still elevated, every glance he gives you now laced with unintended meaning. You don’t say anything, but the tension simmers between you, unacknowledged but undeniably present.
Neither of you acts on it — not yet — but the air is charged, heavy with unspoken heat, and for the first time, Hyunjin notices a small crack in your usual composure.
He leaves and you can breathe. you never really thought of liking Hyunjin this past month so this was really weird.
You get out your room and go to the kitchen. Of course he's there, looking hot as ever. You walk over to the fridge to get a glass of cold water. By the time you get there hyunjin Is all ready putting his shoes on.
“Alright, bye, Y/N,” he says casually, glancing back at you as he reaches for the door handle. “Got a shoot today, so I’ll probably be home late. Like usual.”
His voice is low and rough from the morning, effortlessly calm in a way that makes your stomach do something deeply annoying.
You tighten your grip on the glass slightly before giving him a small nod.
“Okay. Bye.”
The door clicks shut behind him.
And just like that, the apartment feels weirdly empty.
You stare at the glass in your hand for a second before taking a long sip of water, trying very hard not to think about how relieved you are that he left before you embarrassed yourself.
Because seriously.
One dream should not have you acting like this.
You set the glass down with a sigh and lean against the counter. The apartment is quiet except for the faint rain tapping against the windows.
“Get it together,” you mumble to yourself.
You spend the rest of the morning trying to distract yourself.
Laundry.
Studying.
Answering emails.
Anything.
But your brain keeps replaying little things:
his voice this morning,
his sleepy eyes,
the way he looked at you like he knew something was off.
By noon, you’re still annoyed with yourself.
So naturally, you decide the solution is caffeine.
You throw on a hoodie, grab your bag, and head downstairs to the café attached to the building lobby.
The place is warm and crowded from the rain outside. You order quickly, keeping your headphones around your neck while waiting for your drink.
“Y/N?”
You turn.
Felix grins at you from near the pickup counter, umbrella tucked under one arm.
“Oh my god,” you laugh softly. “You’re alive.”
“Barely.” He pulls you into a quick hug. “Midterms?”
“You know it.”
He winces sympathetically. “Brutal.”
You both move to the side while waiting for your drinks.
Then Felix gets this look on his face.
A dangerous one.
“No,” you say immediately.
“I didn’t even say anything yet.”
“You have gossip face.”
“I do not have gossip face.”
“You absolutely do.”
Felix snorts. “Fine. I just wanted to ask how things are going with Hyunjin.”
Why is he asking this...did hyunjinput him up to this??
Your stomach betrays you instantly.
Thankfully Felix is too busy grabbing his coffee to notice.
“Normal,” you answer carefully. “We coexist peacefully. Very thrilling stuff.”
“Mhm.”
You narrow your eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.” He takes a sip. “Just interesting.”
“What is?”
“The fact that Hyunjin actually likes living with someone.”
You blink.
“He’s had roommates before?”
Felix laughs loudly. “God, no. He hates people.”
Your eyebrows lift.
“Seriously,” Felix continues. “Most people drain him after like three days.”
You stare at him.
Because somehow… that doesn’t match the Hyunjin you know.
Sure, he likes quiet.
Sure, he disappears into his room sometimes.
But with you?
He lingers in the kitchen.
Teases you constantly.
Waits up when you study late.
Brings home food without asking.
Your chest feels oddly warm at the thought.
Felix notices your silence immediately.
“Oh my god,” he says slowly.
You panic instantly. “What?”
“You like him.”
You nearly choke on air.
“I do not.”
“Y/N.”
“I don’t!”
Felix just stares.
Then he starts laughing.
Not subtle laughing either.
Full body, evil best-friend laughing.
“You’re doomed,” he says finally.
You groan, covering your face with your sleeve. “Please shut up forever.”
“This is incredible.”
“There is literally nothing happening.”
“Yet.”
You glare at him.
Felix snorts into his coffee, clearly entertained by your suffering. “Good luck living with a supermodel while having a crush on him. That sounds psychologically devastating.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “You’re annoying.”
“And right.”
You hate that he is.
Your phone buzzes against the table.You glance down absentmindedly—and immediately regret it.
HYUNJIN SPOTTED WITH AESPA’S NINGNING AFTER LATE NIGHT DINNER
Your stomach twists.There’s a blurry photo underneath the headline: Hyunjin in a black hoodie, head tilted toward Ningning while she laughs about something. It looks casual. Friendly. Normal.
So why does it feel like someone dropped a brick on your chest?Felix keeps talking across from you, completely unaware while you stare at the screen too long.You quickly lock your phone and shove it into your pocket.
“…and then Chan said—” Felix pauses. “Why do you suddenly look like you witnessed a murder?”
“Nothing,” you say too quickly.
He squints suspiciously. “That was the least convincing ‘nothing’ I’ve ever heard.”
“I’m just tired.”
Felix hums like he doesn’t believe you at all, but thankfully lets it go.
Meanwhile, your brain is spiraling.
They were probably just hanging out. Idols do that all the time. Ningning is gorgeous and funny and talented and—
“Oh my god,” you mumble under your breath.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
Felix studies you for another second before sighing dramatically and standing from his chair. “Alright. I’m gonna pretend I believe you because I’m feeling generous today.”
You roll your eyes, grabbing your bag. “Thanks. Truly life-changing.”
“I know.”
The two of you step out of the café and into the cool evening air, the city buzzing around you with passing cars and scattered conversations. Felix walks beside you casually, hands shoved into his pockets while you try not to think about the article still burned into your brain.
Unfortunately, that’s impossible.
Your mind keeps replaying the picture. Hyunjin leaning close to Ningning. The way she was smiling at him.
You hate how much it bothers you.
When you reach the subway entrance near campus, Felix slows to a stop. “You sure you’re okay?”
You force out a small smile. “Yeah. I’ll survive.”
“Hm.” He clearly doesn’t buy it, but he nudges your shoulder anyway. “Text me when you stop acting weird.”
“I’m always weird.”
“True.”
That finally earns a laugh out of you.
Felix grins triumphantly before turning to head the opposite direction. “See you later!”
“Bye, Felix.”
You watch him disappear into the crowd for a second before pulling your phone back out.
The headline is still there.
Your chest tightens all over again.
-
By the time you get to campus, you’re still thinking about the article—but not in a way that ruins your whole day. More like an annoying background tab your brain refuses to close.
You walk into your lecture hall, grab your usual seat, and settle in with your notes. Phone face down. Focus on the exam.
For a while, it actually works.
You get into it, writing, thinking, moving through questions without much distraction. The world narrows down to your test and the scratch of your pencil.
Then, behind you, a couple students whisper a little too casually.
“Did you see that Hyunjin thing?”
“With Ningning? Yeah, it’s everywhere.”
“They’d actually look good together though.”
You pause for half a second, just enough to register it—then keep writing.Not your business. Not your problem. Just finish the test.
And you do.
When time’s up, you hand it in feeling decent and step out into the hallway with a small stretch, rolling your shoulders as the tension from sitting fades.Your phone buzzes in your pocket.
You check it as you walk.
Only Felix.
Felix:
You survived? Or did the exam finally take you out?
You huff a quiet laugh and reply:
You:
I’m alive. The test didn’t win today.
Felix:
Impressive. Proud of you.
That earns a real smile this time.
You shake your head, slipping your phone away again as you head out of campus.
The train home is crowded but normal. People scrolling, earbuds in, tired faces everywhere. You find a corner spot by the window and settle in, watching the city slide by in soft motion blur.
For a while, it’s peaceful.
Then the train slows earlier than expected.
Not a full stop—just a sudden, uneasy crawl into the next station.
You look up as it pulls in.
Something feels off immediately.
There are more people on the platform than usual. Not just commuters—security standing in small clusters, watching the crowd instead of moving through it.
The train doors open.
No one rushes in like normal.
A few passengers on the platform hesitate, looking down the station like they’re waiting for something else to clear first.Inside your car, the usual chatter fades without anyone deciding to stop talking. It just… dies out naturally.
You catch fragments from nearby:
“What happened?”
“Is it an emergency?”
“Why are they not letting people through?”
A security guard walks quickly past your window on the platform, speaking into a radio. Another follows, then another.Nothing is directly happening to your train. Nothing is happening to you.But the uncertainty is heavy enough that it spreads anyway.
The doors stay open a few seconds longer than normal.Then finally close.The train moves again, slowly at first, then back to speed like nothing happened.But no one fully goes back to their phone.Even you don’t.You just sit there, watching the station disappear behind you, wondering what that was about.By the time your stop arrives, the moment already feels distant—like something that almost mattered.You step off, adjust your bag, and head toward your dorm building.
The walk is quiet, familiar, grounding. Inside, the warmth of your dorm hits you instantly. You drop your things by the door and finally exhale fully.
Home.
No chaos. No headlines. No strange pauses in train stations.
Just you, safe, tired, and done for the day.
You contemplate on showering or just changing your clothes...
In the end you just decide to get in the shower and to feel fresh.
You stand under the warm spray of the shower for a long moment before actually moving.Steam fills the small bathroom, softening everything, your thoughts, your tiredness, the leftover noise from the day. The water hits your shoulders and suddenly it feels like the tension you didn’t even realize you were holding starts to loosen.
Nothing is rushing you anymore.
No train announcements. No whispers in lecture halls. No headlines. No Felix teasing. No Hyunjin-related chaos orbiting your brain.
Just water.
You close your eyes for a second, letting it all fade into something simple.
When you finally step out, wrapped in a towel and feeling lighter, the room feels even calmer than before. Your lamp light is dim, your clothes are already laid out, and your phone is sitting quietly on your bed like it hasn’t caused you a single problem all day.
You change slowly, comfortably, since you’ve got nowhere else to be.
Hair damp, hoodie on, you flop onto your bed with a soft sigh. The ceiling becomes interesting in the way only ceilings can be when you’re finally relaxed.
Your phone buzzes once.
You don’t rush to grab it this time.
After a second, you do.
Felix:
You better be alive AND recovered. I’m ranking your exam performance tomorrow!
You let out a small laugh, turning onto your side.
You:
I survived everything today. Even you.
There’s a pause.
Then another buzz.
Felix:
Impossible. I’m the hardest thing you deal with.
You smile into your pillow, finally letting your eyes drift shut.For the first time all day, your thoughts are quiet.
You wake up slowly, the way you always do when nothing is demanding you rush.The apartment is quiet in that soft morning way—sunlight slipping through the curtains, dust drifting in the beam near your bed, the distant hum of the city outside your window. Your phone is face down on your nightstand. No buzzing. No chaos.
Just calm. For a few seconds, you don’t even think about anything. You just exist there, half-awake, staring at the ceiling. Then you sit up, hair messy, blanket sliding off your shoulders. Your feet touch the cold floor and you stretch with a yawn, already feeling a little more alive.
Bathroom. Routine. Normal things.
You brush your teeth, rinse your face with cold water, and blink at yourself in the mirror. You look fine—just tired in a regular way. Nothing feels off. Nothing feels different.
That’s what makes it worse.
Because everything feels normal.
You walk back out into the hallway, towel hanging loosely in your hand, already thinking about coffee and what you’re wearing today.
Your steps stop in the hallway.
Everything in your body goes still like it’s been paused mid-motion. The kind of silence that isn’t peaceful—just sudden.
Shoes by the door.
Two voices in your kitchen.
Hyunjin’s voice comes first. Familiar, but not fully relaxed. There’s something slightly stiff in it, like he’s aware of the situation in a way you don’t understand yet.
Then another voice answers him.
You don’t recognize it.Light. Calm. Polite laughter at the end of a sentence you can’t quite hear.Your grip tightens on the towel without you noticing.
Okay. Someone’s here.
That’s all your brain manages at first.
You take a slow step forward before you can talk yourself out of it. Then another. Your heart isn’t racing yet but it’s definitely paying attention now.
You round the corner into the kitchen.Hyunjin is there first.
He looks up immediately when he sees you, and something in his expression shifts fast surprise, then awkwardness settling in right after. Like he didn’t expect this moment to happen right now.
“Oh—hey,” he says, but it comes out a little uneven. Not his usual easy tone.
And then you see the other person.
Its Ning Ning sitting near the counter.
You notice she's wearing one of his shirts.
Wait she's wearing his shirt...
She turns toward you at the sound of your voice, expression polite, slightly surprised but composed. Someone you don’t recognize at all.
She gives a small, careful smile.
“Hi,” she says softly.
That’s it.
Nothing dramatic. Nothing obvious.
But your brain still short-circuits for a second anyway, because you clearly were not expecting anyone here.
You force yourself to respond.
“Hi,” you say quickly, a little too fast, like you’re trying to catch up to the situation.
Your eyes flick between them.
Hyunjin shifts his weight slightly, rubbing the back of his neck like he’s suddenly very aware of how this looks but then he smirks.
“she's just my roommate,” he States not really trying get into it.
The girl glances at him, then back at you, staying quiet.
You don’t know what’s going on, and your brain is not helping you figure it out fast enough.
So instead of standing there and making it more awkward—
“I—uh,” you say, already backing up a step. “I’m just gonna—yeah.”
You turn too quickly and head back down the hallway.
Fast enough that it’s obvious you’re leaving.
Not fast enough to look like you’re running.
You reach your room and close the door behind you.
Click.
Silence.
You lean against it for a second, exhaling hard.
Your mind is going a little too fast now—not panic exactly, just overload. Confusion stacking on top of confusion.
From the other side of the door, you can hear faint movement again. Hyunjin’s voice lower, talking to the girl. Then her replying softly. Then his tone smooth like that didn't just happen.
And you just sit there on your bed, staring at the floor, trying to make sense of the fact that your normal morning just turned into something you did not see coming at all.
-
You get to campus, but even as you sit through class, it’s like a fog is hanging over you—the phrase still looping in your head, “She’s just my roommate.” You push through, though, focusing on the lecture, jotting down notes, and by the time the afternoon rolls around, you feel slightly steadier.
-
When you get back to the apartment, you expect it to be empty—or at least, you hope it is—but as you open the door, you see Hyunjin on the couch.
You freeze for a moment by the door, your hand still on the strap of your bag. The tension hangs between you like a thin wire—neither of you saying much, but the weight of what you both know sits heavy. Hyunjin shifts slightly on the couch, as if deciding whether to say something big or let it drop.
You pause in the doorway for half a second longer than you mean to.
“Hey,” he says he’s not sure what version of you just walked in.
You close the door behind you and try to act like everything is fine.
“Hey,” you answer back, casual, dropping your bag by the wall.
A beat of silence.
Hyunjin shifts slightly on the couch, phone still in his hand but forgotten now. “How was class?”
“Normal,” you say immediately, too quickly, then add, “Just… long.”He nods once like that makes sense.But the pause after it is doing more talking than either of you.
You glance toward the kitchen, then back at him, like you’re deciding whether to disappear into your room or not.
Hyunjin speaks first.
“…You’ve been quiet,” he says, tone lighter now, almost joking, but not fully landing it.
You let out a small breath through your nose. “I was at campus all day. I’m always quiet.”
That earns a short huff of a laugh from him, but it doesn’t fully break the tension.
Another pause.
Then he leans forward a little, elbows on his knees, like he’s deciding whether to say something real.
About this morning.
About Ningning.
About whatever that awkwardness was.
But instead, he just says, “You ate?”
It’s simple. Normal. Safe.
You blink once, a little thrown by the shift, then shrug. “Not yet.”
“Mm,” he nods, standing up now like that settles it. “I’ll order something then.”
You watch him for a second as he moves past the couch toward the kitchen.
It should feel normal.
It almost does.
But there’s still that weird thin thread between you two—something unsaid, something neither of you is touching directly, like both of you are pretending the morning didn’t come with questions attached.
Hyunjin opens his phone again at the counter.
Then, without looking up, he adds casually, “And… earlier. It was just kind of messy timing. That’s all.”
You lean back slightly against the wall, arms crossed now without thinking.
“Yeah,” you say after a second. “I figured.”
He glances up at that, just briefly.
Like he’s checking your face for something.
But you don’t give him much to read.
So he just nods again, slower this time, and goes back to his phone.
And the apartment settles into that familiar quiet again—same space, same people just with something slightly off still sitting between both of you, unspoken but very much there.
“Okay, well I’m gonna go in my room and study,” you say, already trying to step out of the moment.
It’s not even dramatic. Just an exit. A reset button.You turn toward your room.
One step.
Two.
“Y/n,” Hyunjin says, quieter this time. Not sharp—just calling you back before you fully disappear.
You pause. Slowly turn.
“Yeah?”
He’s still by the kitchen counter, phone down now. He looks at you like he’s actually thinking, not just reacting.
“Come study out here,” he says. “You’re always in your room.You let out a small breath, leaning your shoulder lightly against the hallway wall.
“I don’t know, Hyunjin,” you say honestly. “My room is just… relaxing. It’s quiet. I can actually focus there.”
He nods like he understands, but doesn’t let it go.“Please,” he adds, a little softer now. “We never really spend time together. It’s kinda sad.”
That pulls a faint reaction out of you—almost a smile, almost a scoff.
You look at him for a second longer than you mean to.
“You weren’t lonely yesterday,” you say before you can fully filter it.
The moment it leaves your mouth, you realize it sounds sharper than intended.
Hyunjin pauses.
Then he exhales a small laugh—not offended, more caught off guard.
“Wow,” he says, tilting his head slightly. “Okay.”
There’s a beat of silence.
Not heavy exactly—but aware.
You immediately feel it and adjust your tone, softer now.
“I just mean… you were fine,” you add quickly. “You had people over. You weren’t exactly missing me.”
His expression shifts at that—something subtle, harder to read. Like he’s deciding how to respond without making it weird again.
He leans back against the counter.
“Yeah,” he says after a second, calmer. “That wasn’t—like that.”
You nod once, but don’t push it.
Another pause settles in. Then he gestures toward the couch lightly.
“Just sit for a bit,” he says, more casual now, like he’s backing away from whatever almost came up. “You can study, I’ll be quiet. I promise.”
You hesitate.
Your room is right there. Your routine. Your space.
But the apartment is quiet in a different way now—not uncomfortable, just… waiting.
So you slowly walk over, dropping your bag near the couch.
Hyunjin moves a little to make space, glancing at you briefly before looking away again like he’s trying not to overthink you not leaving.
You sit down.
Open your laptop.
Pretend to focus.
And for a while, it’s just that—two people in the same space, not fully talking, not fully distant either.
Hyunjin scrolls quietly beside you, occasionally typing something on his phone, while you try to read a paragraph three times without absorbing it.
Every so often, there’s a small shift—him glancing over like he wants to say something, then stopping.
You notice it.
He notices you noticing it.
Neither of you comments.
And somehow, that makes it even more obvious that whatever this is between you two—whatever almost-moments and half-sentences exist—it’s still sitting there.
“Okay, what do you want to eat?” Hyunjin asks after a moment, breaking the quiet first.
You glance up from your laptop, blinking like you had to rewind your brain a second.
“Uhhh…” you drag it out, leaning back into the couch. “I don’t really know. Maybe Chipotle?”
“Mm,” he nods like that actually sounds good. “That sounds nice. I haven’t had that in a minute.”
He tilts his head slightly. “What do you usually get there?”
You pause.
“Honestly?” you say, a little sheepish. “I’ve never had it before.”
There’s a beat.
Then Hyunjin turns his head toward you fully.
“…You what?”
His expression shifts immediately into genuine disbelief.
“Y/n,” he says slowly, like he’s trying to process it. “Do you live under exam papers? How have you never tried it?”
You shrug, completely unbothered on the outside.
“I don’t know,” you say. Then, after a pause, you add, “Maybe I’m broke.”
He squints at you like he doesn’t believe that for a second.
You crack a small smile and correct yourself. “Okay, I’m kidding. I just… eat what I like. I don’t branch out much.”
That lands a little better.
Hyunjin leans back again, still looking at you like you’ve just revealed a shocking piece of information about your entire life.
Silence follows.
But it’s not the tense kind anymore.
Just… blank.
Normal.
You feel it first—that tiny moment where you wonder if you said something weird. If you killed the vibe again. If you’re about to retreat back into your room out of habit.
But then Hyunjin lets out a short laugh.
“Okay, that’s actually kind of tragic,” he says.
“Excuse you,” you reply immediately, but there’s no real bite to it.
He shakes his head, already reaching for his phone.
“Alright,” he says. “We’re fixing this.”
“Fixing what?”
“Your entire food existence.”
You stare at him. “That sounds dramatic.”
“It is,” he agrees easily.
A few taps on his phone.
Then he glances over at you again. “I’m ordering. You’re trusting me.”
“I don’t trust you.”
“Too late.”
You huff a small laugh despite yourself, leaning your head back against the couch.For a moment, there’s no tension. No awkwardness. No morning replaying itself in your head.
Just the sound of him scrolling through options and occasionally muttering things like “this is criminal you’ve never had this” under his breath.
And somehow, without either of you really addressing anything else, the apartment feels normal again.
Not solved.
Not perfect.
Just… easier to exist in.
-
Fifteen minutes later, the apartment door buzzes.
Hyunjin glances up from his phone. “That was fast.”
You sit up slightly on the couch, closing your laptop fully this time. “That’s our food?”
“Yeah,” he says, already standing. “Stay there.”
You watch him walk to the door, still in that relaxed, careless way like he belongs in the space just as much as you do. A moment later he’s back, carrying two bags and a drink carrier balanced like it’s second nature.
He drops everything onto the kitchen counter.
“Okay,” he announces, like he’s presenting something important. “Your first Chipotle experience is officially starting.”
You scoff lightly. “It’s not that deep.”
“It is to me,” he says, opening one of the bags.
You move over to the counter beside him, watching as he starts laying everything out. The smell hits instantly—warm, savory, kind of overwhelming in a good way.
He glances at you. “Alright. I got you something simple. No weird combinations. I didn’t want to traumatize you on day one.”
You raise an eyebrow. “That’s thoughtful of you.”
“I know,” he says casually. “I try.”
That makes you laugh a little—actually laugh, not just a small breath through your nose.
Hyunjin pauses for half a second when he hears it, then smiles a bit himself like he didn’t expect it to come out that easily.
“Okay,” he says, pointing at you slightly. “That laugh was good. You should do that more.”
You roll your eyes. “Don’t get used to it.”
“No promises.”
You both grab your food and move back toward the couch. For a while, it’s just eating and small comments—him explaining what everything is like you’ve never seen food before, you pushing back every now and then just to annoy him.
It’s… easy.
At some point, you’re actually relaxed.
Hyunjin leans back, watching you take a bite. “So?”
You chew, thinking for a second. “Okay,” you admit. “This is actually good.”
His face lights up just slightly. “Right? I told you.”
You shake your head. “You’re way too proud of this.”
“I have to be,” he says. “This is character development for you.”
You laugh again, and this time it sticks a little longer.
There’s a pause after that where neither of you are speaking, just eating. The TV is off, the apartment quiet except for small sounds of wrappers and cutlery.
Then Hyunjin shifts a little, glancing at you sideways.
“You’re less… tense now,” he says, like he’s observing it more than stating it.
You look over at him. “I wasn’t tense.”
He gives you a look.
You pause. “…Okay, maybe a little.”
That earns a soft laugh from him.
He leans his arm along the back of the couch again, not touching you, but closer than before in a way that feels more casual than careful now.
“You’re kind of funny when you’re not overthinking everything,” he says.
You blink. “Excuse me?”
“I’m just saying,” he adds quickly, but he’s smiling now. “It’s a good look on you.”
A good look on you is he flirting???
Hyunjin is the first to relax into it completely, one arm resting along the back of the couch, the other holding his bowl.
“You’re eating it like it’s a science experiment,” he says, glancing over at you.
“I’m literally just eating,” you reply, taking another bite.
He hums like he doesn’t believe you.
A second later, you notice his phone come up—not to text, but angled slightly toward you.
You squint. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing,” he says too quickly.
That immediately makes you suspicious.
“Hyunjin.”
He laughs under his breath, still holding the phone up. “Okay, wait—stay like that for a second.”
“Why?”
“Just—don’t move.”
Before you can argue again, you hear the soft click of his camera.
You freeze. “Did you just—”
He’s already looking at the photo, nodding like he’s satisfied. “Yeah. That one’s good.”
You reach for him slightly. “Delete it.”
“No,” he says, completely calm.
“You didn’t even ask.”
“I just did,” he replies, like that solves everything.
You narrow your eyes, but there’s no real heat behind it. “I look crazy.”
“You look like you’re experiencing culture,” he corrects.
“That’s not better.”
He ignores you, taking another picture—this time of your food.
Then another.
“Hyunjin, stop—”
“I’m documenting,” he says, focused now, like it’s important work. “This is your first Chipotle arc. It needs coverage.”
You let out a small laugh despite yourself. “You’re actually insane.”
“Thank you.”
He leans back again, scrolling through the photos now, occasionally adding captions under his breath. You notice it a second later.
His phone screen—his Instagram.
“Wait,” you say, sitting up slightly. “Are you posting that?”
“Maybe,” he says casually.
“I’m posting history,” he corrects again, completely serious this time like he’s documenting something important.
You shake your head, still eating. “You’re so dramatic.”
He ignores you and taps a few more times on his phone.A second later, your phone buzzes.
Once.
Then again.
You pause mid-bite.
“…what was that?” you mutter, mostly to yourself.
Hyunjin hears it immediately.
His head tilts slightly, eyes flicking toward your phone on the couch.
“Was that an Instagram notification?” he asks, smirking a little as his eyebrow raises.
Your stomach drops just a bit.
“No,” you answer too fast.
Way too fast.
That makes his expression shift instantly—like he already knows the answer.
“Oh?” he says, leaning forward slightly now.
You reach for your phone at the exact same time he does.
But he’s faster.
“Hyunjin—”
He picks it up, glancing at the screen with a small, knowing smile already forming.
And there it is.
@ hynjinnnn posted a new story
He looks at you over the top of your phone.
That smirk is fully there now.
“Wow,” he says slowly. “You don’t even follow me?”
You reach for your phone. “Give it back.”
He holds it just out of reach, scrolling with his thumb like he’s enjoying this way too much.
“Oh,” he continues, reading silently for a second before his smile widens. “This is actually insane.”
“Hyunjin.”
He finally shows you the screen.
Your eyes land on it.
The photos. The captions. “I changed her life today.”
You immediately grab for your phone again, but he pulls it back, laughing under his breath.
“You posted me eating,” you say, half accusing, half shocked.
“I documented your evolution,” he corrects.
“You’re unbelievable.”
“Yeah,” he agrees easily, still looking amused. “But you’re kind of trending right now.”
That makes you stop.
“…what?”
He shrugs, still holding your phone. “People are reacting.”
You stare at him.
Then at your phone.
Then back at him.
“Give me that.”
“No,” he says simply.
You narrow your eyes. “Hyunjin.”
He finally laughs, handing it back—but slower than necessary, like he wants you to suffer a little first.
When you take it, your notifications are already exploding.And beside you, he leans back into the couch again, clearly pleased with himself.
Like this was the plan the entire time.
You snatch your phone back and immediately open the notifications.
It’s exactly what you feared. New followers. Mentions. People reacting to his story like it’s some kind of public event instead of you just eating on a couch in peace.
You exhale through your nose. “You’re actually insane for this.”
Hyunjin leans back like he’s completely unbothered, one arm draped over the couch again. “I prefer ‘creative.’”
“You posted me without warning.”
“I gave you warning,” he says.
“When?”
“When I said don’t move.”
You stare at him.
He smiles a little, like he knows he’s winning this argument.
You lock your phone and set it down a bit too firmly. “I hate you sometimes.”
“That’s fine,” he replies casually. “You still ate my food.”
“That’s not how this works.”
“It is now.”
A beat passes.
The apartment is quiet again except for the low hum of the city outside. The food is half-finished on the table, forgotten for a second as you both sit there.
Then Hyunjin glances at you again.
Not teasing this time. Just watching you like he’s thinking.
“You’re not actually mad,” he says.
You don’t answer right away.
Because you’re not.
Annoyed? Yes.
Flustered? Maybe a little.
Mad? Not really.
So you shrug. “You’re just annoying.”
“That’s closer.”
You roll your eyes, reaching for your food again. “You’re lucky I don’t care that much.”
Hyunjin hums like he’s considering that.
Then, casually, he says, “You do a little.”
You pause mid-bite.
Slowly look over at him.
He’s already looking back at you, expression relaxed, almost amused—but there’s something softer under it now, less performative than before.
You narrow your eyes slightly. “Don’t start.”
“I’m not starting anything,” he says easily. “Just observing.”
You look away first, because staying on his face for too long feels like a mistake you don’t want to explain.The moment stretches again.
Not awkward.
Just aware.
Then Hyunjin reaches for his phone again, breaking it on purpose.
“Relax,” he adds, lighter again. “I’ll stop posting your internet debut.”
“Thank you.”
“For now.”
You groan quietly, but there’s a small smile tugging at your mouth anyway.
He notices.
Of course he does.
But he doesn’t say anything this time.
Just goes back to eating like everything is normal again—like he didn’t just turn your completely normal evening into something slightly louder, slightly messier, and way harder to ignore.
-
Morning comes in quietly, slipping through the curtains before you’re fully ready for it.
Your alarm goes off once, then again, before you finally shut it off and lie there for a second, staring at the ceiling. The apartment is still—no noise from the kitchen, no movement outside your door. Just that early-morning stillness.
You sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes, letting the sleep wear off in layers.
For a moment, everything from yesterday feels distant. Almost like it didn’t fully happen.
Almost.
You get up, grab your clothes, and head to the bathroom. The routine helps—water on your face, brushing your teeth, the simple repetition of it all pulling you back into something normal. Something steady.
When you step out, hair slightly damp, the apartment is still quiet.
Too quiet.
You pause in the hallway.
Hyunjin’s door is still closed.
You hesitate for a second, then walk toward the kitchen anyway, expecting the usual emptiness.
But as you round the corner—
Hyunjin is already there.
Leaning against the counter, half-awake, hoodie slightly loose, hair messier than usual. He’s holding a cup of something warm, staring at his phone like he’s been up for a while already.
He glances up when you enter.
“Morning,” he says, voice still a little rough from sleep.
You blink. “You’re up early.”
He shrugs slightly. “Couldn’t sleep much.”
There’s a pause.
Not heavy like before.
Just… aware.
You walk to the fridge, grabbing water, pretending your movements are normal, like nothing is sitting between you two from yesterday.
Hyunjin watches you for a second, then looks away first.
“Got class today?” he asks.
“Yeah,” you answer. “shoot today?”
“Later.”
Silence settles again, but it’s different than last night. Softer. Less charged.
You twist the bottle cap slowly.
Then Hyunjin adds, casually, “Yesterday was fine, right?”
You stop for half a second.
Not long enough to make it obvious.
Then you nod. “Yeah. It was fine.”
He gives a small nod too, like that’s enough.
“Good,” he says.
Another pause.
He takes a sip from his drink, then glances at you again—but only briefly this time.
“No more surprise guests,” he adds lightly, like a joke trying to smooth the memory out.
You huff a small breath through your nose. “Yeah. Please.”
That gets a quiet laugh out of him.
And for the first time since everything started feeling weird—
it actually feels normal again.
Not solved.
Just reset enough to breathe.
Campus hits differently that morning.
At first, it’s normal you walk through the entrance, adjust your bag, blend into the flow of students moving between buildings.
Then you notice it.
A glance.
Then another.
Two girls near the steps stop talking mid-sentence when you pass. Someone farther ahead turns their head just a second too long. A small cluster of people whispering lowers their voices the moment you get close.
You slow slightly without meaning to.Something feels off.
You pull your phone out, more out of habit than curiosity, and that’s when it hits you again.
Hyunjin’s story.
The food. The couch. You mid-bite. The caption still sitting there like it didn’t cause an entire ripple overnight.
I changed her life today.
You stare at it for a second longer than you should.
“…right,” you mutter under your breath, locking your phone.
Of course.
You keep walking, but now you’re more aware of everything—how conversations dip when you pass, how a couple people glance at you and then quickly look away like they’ve been caught doing something.
It’s not loud. Not obvious.
Just enough to feel it.
You adjust your grip on your bag strap, trying to act like you don’t notice.Because you don’t want to make it bigger than it is.You reach your building, heading up the steps, when you hear it clearly for the first time.
“Isn’t that her?”
A pause.
“I swear that’s the girl from his story.”
You don’t stop walking.
You don’t turn around.
But your pace tightens just slightly.
Not panic.
Just awareness.
You push through the doors, into the hallway, letting the noise fade behind you.Inside, it’s quieter again.Safer, in a way.You exhale slowly, adjusting your bag on your shoulder as you head toward class.It’s ridiculous, you tell yourself.
It’s just a story.
People forget things fast.
By tomorrow, it’ll be nothing.
But even as you sit down in your seat and open your notebook, you can still feel it like the world saw you for a second longer than you meant to be seen.And somewhere in the back of your mind, you already know: Hyunjin definitely made it worse.
Then your phone buzzes again.
You already know before you even look.
You unlock it slowly.
Your stomach drops a little.
+20,000 followers
You blink once.
Then again.
It doesn’t really make sense at first, like your brain is refusing to process the number properly. You open your profile.
It’s real.
Twenty thousand more people. All at once. Watching. Clicking. Curiosity from a single story that somehow turned into something way bigger than it should’ve been.
You sit back slightly in your chair.
“…what,” you whisper to yourself.
You scroll for a second, overwhelmed by it more than anything else. Your posts barely exist—random photos, study notes, coffee cups, nothing worth that kind of attention.
But now it’s different.
Now it feels like eyes you didn’t invite are just… there.You lock your phone quickly and set it face-down on the desk.
A beat passes.
Then it buzzes again.
You hesitate.
Felix
You open the message.
Felix:
yo what happened 😭
why is your name everywhere rn
did hyunjin do something AGAIN
answer me i’m stressed
You stare at the screen.
Then slowly type back.
You:
it’s not that serious
he just posted a story
people are overreacting
Almost instantly, the typing bubbles appear.
Felix:
“just posted a story”???
girl i saw it it’s not “just” anything
hyunjin has like half the internet watching him 💀
are you okay though??
You pause at that last message.
Your eyes flick up briefly, classroom noise fading into the background again.
Then you type:
You:
yeah i’m fine
you: just didn’t expect it to blow up like this
A second later:
Felix:
i knew it was gonna be chaos when he got involved 😭
Felix: just ignore the noise okay
Felix: people get bored fast anyway
You stare at that for a second.
Ignore the noise.
Easy for him to say.
You lock your phone again and set it down, but this time it doesn’t feel as simple.
Because even if you’re not doing anything different. it suddenly feels like everyone thinks you are.
You keep your phone face-down on the desk, trying to settle back into class.The professor is talking, something about notes and deadlines, but the words don’t fully stick. You force your pen to move anyway—writing things you’ll probably have to reread later.
Every so often, you feel it again.
The subtle shift.
Someone glancing your way.Someone recognizing you and then quickly looking back down.
You try to ignore it. You really do.
By the time class ends, your head feels a little heavy from it all.
You pack your bag slowly, letting the room empty out before you stand. The hallway outside is busier—students moving in groups, voices overlapping.
And again, you catch fragments.
“That’s her—”
“Hyunjin’s story—”
“No way she actually—”
You walk faster without meaning to.
Not running.
Just… escaping the sound.
Outside, the air feels better, but not completely normal. You keep your eyes forward, heading toward the exit, telling yourself it’ll die down in a day or two. People move on. They always do.
Your phone buzzes again.
You already expect it this time.
Hyunjin
You stop walking for half a second.
Then open it.
Hyunjin: u good?
You stare at the message.
He didn’t usually text like this in the middle of the day.
You type slowly.
you: yeah
you: just didn’t expect it to get this big
A pause.
Then:
Hyunjin: yeah… my bad
Hyunjin: didn’t think people would run with it like that
You exhale through your nose, continuing to walk again.
you: it’s fine
you: just campus being weird
Three dots appear immediately.
Then disappear.
Then come back.
Hyunjin: you want me to delete it?
You stop walking again.
That actually makes you pause.
Your thumb hovers.
Because part of you wants to say yes.
To make it all disappear.
To reset everything.
But another part of you knows it won’t really fix the fact that people already saw it.
You finally type:
you: no
you: it’s okay
you: it’ll die down
Another pause.
Then:
Hyunjin: you sure?
You look up for a second, watching students pass you by, none of them paying attention right now.
You type:
you: yeah
you: just ignore it like everyone says
A beat.
Then his reply:
Hyunjin: alright
Hyunjin: but text me if it gets annoying
You stare at that last message a little longer than you mean to.
Then lock your phone.
And keep walking.
But even as you try to drop it—
you can still feel it. The attention. The eyes.
Like something small got pulled into something bigger without asking you first.
-
When you get back to the apartment, it’s quieter than campus—but your mind doesn’t follow.
You close the door behind you and kick off your shoes, already half-tired from the day. The buzz of your phone had slowed down, but not stopped completely.
Hyunjin is on the couch again. Of course he is.
He looks up when you walk in. “Hey.”
You give a small nod. “Hey.”
There’s a pause—not awkward, just careful.You drop your bag by the wall. “Campus is… a lot today.”
He exhales through his nose like he already knows what that means. “Yeah. I figured.”
You glance toward your room automatically, already thinking about shutting the door, disappearing into your own space, letting everything reset.
But before you can move—
“Wait,” Hyunjin says.
You stop. “What?” He tilts his head slightly toward the couch. “Don’t go in your room yet.”
You blink. “Why?” He shrugs, too casual. “Just stay out here a bit. Chill.”
You hesitate. “Hyunjin, I’m just gonna—”
“Relax,” he cuts in, not forceful, just easy. “Watch a movie or something. You’ve been locked in your room way too much lately anyway.”
You stare at him for a second.
Then sigh, dropping your bag again. “You’re annoying.”
“I’ve been told.”
Still, you sit.
He’s already grabbing the remote like this was decided earlier.
A movie starts playing, something random neither of you are paying full attention to at first. The apartment feels normal again in that strange way it always does with him—like nothing serious can stay serious for long.
For a while, it works.
You actually relax a little.
Then Hyunjin shifts.
Not dramatic. Just subtle.
“Hey,” he says, eyes still on the screen. “About today.”
Your body tenses slightly, even if your face doesn’t show it.
“Yeah?”
He pauses like he’s choosing words. Then he glances at you—not long, but enough.
“I just… didn’t think it would blow up like that,” he says. “The story.” You nod once. “It’s fine. It’s not your fault.”
A beat. He doesn’t look back at the TV immediately.
Instead, his gaze stays on you a second longer than usualLike he’s checking.Not in a dramatic way.
More like he actually wants to know.
“You’re sure?” he asks.
You shrug lightly. “Yeah. It’s just annoying. It’ll pass.”
That should’ve been the end of it.But he doesn’t turn away right away.His expression is calmer now, but there’s something in his eyes focused, quieter than his usual teasing self. Less noise.
“Okay,” he says slowly.
Then, like he’s trying to make it lighter again, he adds, “You’re kinda scary when you’re stressed. Just saying.”
That gets a small breath of a laugh out of you. “Excuse me?”
“I mean it in a good way,” he says quickly, but he’s smiling now.The tension loosens again.
Almost.You lean back into the couch, trying to return to the movie.
But every so often, you feel it.His attention drifting toward you more than the screen.Like he’s not fully watching.Like he’s making sure you’re okay without saying it directly.
And that alone is… a little harder to ignore than the story itself.
The movie keeps playing, but neither of you is really watching it anymore.
You’re both settled into the couch—at least at first.
Hyunjin is leaned back, arm resting along the top again, while you sit slightly angled, trying to stay comfortable but still a little aware of him beside you.
At some point, the silence shifts.
Not tense.
Just quieter.
The kind where you start noticing small things again—how close the couch actually is, how the space between you isn’t as big as it felt earlier.
Hyunjin shifts first.
He reaches for the remote without looking properly and accidentally pauses the movie.
“…oops,” he mutters.
You glance at the screen. “You did that on purpose.”
“I did not.”
“You did.”
He scoffs lightly, leaning forward to fix it—but instead of sitting back exactly where he was, he shifts closer on instinct, like there’s more space than there actually is.
Now there’s less distance between you.
Not touching.
Just closer.
You notice it immediately.
You don’t move away, though.
Hyunjin resumes the movie, acting like nothing changed. “It’s fine. We weren’t even watching it.”
“We were,” you correct.
“No, you were thinking.”
You turn your head slightly. “About what?”
He glances at you for half a second. “Everything except the movie.”
That makes you huff a quiet laugh, but your attention drifts back to the screen anyway.
A few seconds pass.
Then his shoulder shifts—subtle—but now he’s leaned just a bit more toward your side without fully meaning to.
The couch is narrow enough that it makes the distance feel smaller than before.You notice it again.
This time, he does too.
But neither of you comments.
The movie continues in the background, forgotten dialogue and moving scenes, while the real focus sits in the space between you.
Hyunjin clears his throat slightly. “You cold?”
You blink. “No.”
He nods once. “Okay.”
But he doesn’t move away.
And somehow, neither do you.
A quiet beat passes.
Then he speaks again, softer this time.
“You know…” he starts, eyes still on the screen but not really there. “You don’t actually have to hide in your room all the time.”
You don’t answer immediately.
Instead, you glance at him.
He’s closer now than earlier—not invading space, just… there. Present. Unusually calm.
“I don’t hide,” you say finally.
He hums like he doesn’t believe you.
“You do a little,” he says.
You roll your eyes, but there’s no real heat in it.
Then, after a pause, you adjust slightly on the couch—and that movement closes the distance just a fraction more without you even meaning to.
Now your shoulders are almost aligned.
Still not touching.But close enough that it’s noticeable.Hyunjin pauses again, like he’s aware of it too. This time, his voice is quieter.
“Better?” he asks.
You look at him.
Then back at the TV.
“…shut up,” you say, but it comes out softer than you intended.
He smiles.
And neither of you moves away.
-
You notice when he’s tired.
You bring snacks back “accidentally” from campus.
You sit closer without realizing you’re doing it until it’s already happened.
But the weird part is—
you still don’t know what it is.
Sometimes it feels like friendship.
Sometimes it feels like something just slightly more than that, but neither of you names it.
Because naming it would make it real.
And that feels like too much to figure out right now.
So instead, you just keep living in it.
In the shared living room.
In the quiet routines.
In the almost-too-comfortable space between you and Hyunjin that keeps getting smaller without either of you stopping it.
m
Over the next two weeks, things shift without either of you really deciding to let it happen.
At first, it’s small.
You start coming out of your room “just for a second” to grab water, then somehow end up staying in the living room while Hyunjin is there.
Then it becomes normal.
You studying on the couch while he scrolls his phone beside you.
Him putting on random movies or music in the background while you pretend to focus but end up listening anyway.
You still go to your room sometimes, but not as much as before.
And he notices.
Of course he does.
At some point, it’s not even planned anymore—you just end up in the same space.
You walk in from campus, drop your bag, and he’s already there.
Or he gets back and you’re already on the couch.
No big announcement. No clear agreement.
Just… coexistence.
And somewhere in between the jokes, the food runs, the shared silence, and the random conversations that go nowhere .
This is also related to my SKZ Big Brother headcanons I did a while back. You don't have to read them, but you can if you'd like :)
SS Count: 28
A/N: I don't tend to get into the more negative side of things on my Tumblr, but in wake of some stuff that's come out today I wanted to post this Felix SMAU and remind ya'll that this man is genuinely one of the sweetest idols out there. He (and the rest of SKZ) deserve the world.
Photo Texts: Bang Chan - Lee Know - Changbin - Hyunjin - Han - Felix - Seungmin - I.N
𝓎our boyfriends will always assure you that they love you equally, because there's no them without you ♡
💭 :: 122O comfort relationship insecurity emotional distress mild angst
the thing about joining a relationship that already has years of history is that you always feel like you're trying to catch up.
jisung and felix had been a couple for two years before they met you. they had an entire universe built between the two of them—inside jokes that started with just a single word, a specific look across a room that meant they needed to leave, and a rhythm to their daily life that felt completely seamless.
when they asked you to be with them, it felt like a fucking dream. they both loved you loudly and gently, always trying to make sure you felt cherished. but love couldn't instantly erase two years of shared memories, and lately, the gaps were starting to feel wider.
you were sitting on the living room floor of their apartment, leaning against the couch while the two of them sat on the cushions above you. a comedy show was playing on the tv, but you weren't really watching it.
"wait, 'lix, remember that one time at the beach?" jisung suddenly burst out laughing, nudging felix's shoulder. "with the ice cream cone and the bird?"
felix’s face lit up instantly, his deep laugh echoing through the room. "oh my god, yes! i completely forgot about that. the guy's face was priceless."
they went back and forth for a few minutes, completly lost in the memory, laughing so hard they were breathless. you sat quietly, a polite, faint smile on your face, staring at the tv screen. you didn't know what beach they were talking about.
you didn't know about the bird or the ice cream.
and, like, it wasn't their fault. they weren't trying to exclude you, and if you asked, they would gladly explain the story. but explaining a joke always took the fun out of it, and it only served as a reminder that you weren't there when it happened.
this had been happening more and more. a specific phrase would make them both giggle, or a song would come on the radio and they’d exchange a knowing glance. every time it happened, a cold, heavy knot formed in your stomach.
the thought had started as a tiny whisper a few weeks ago, but now it was a constant, loud voice in your head: you don't fit here. they were perfect together. they balanced each other out completely. you loved them both so much, but you were starting to feel like a guest in your own relationship, a temporary addition that they would eventually realize they didn't actually need.
what would you do when that day came? wouldn't it just be better to leave now? wouldn't it... hurt less?
the episode ended, and the room fell into a quiet, comfortable silence. comfortable for them, maybe, because you just felt like you were out of place.
"hey," felix’s soft voice broke the quiet. you felt his hand drop onto your shoulder, his thumb gently rubbing through your shirt. "you've been really quiet tonight. are you tired, darling?"
"a little bit," you lied softly, keeping your eyes on the floor.
jisung leaned over the edge of the couch, his face coming into your line of sight. his eyebrows were knitted together, his eyes fixed your face with instant worry. "it's not just tired. you have your thinking face on. what's wrong?"
you swallowed hard, trying to blink back the tears. you hadn't planned on saying anything, but it was getting too much.
"do you guys... ever feel like you're just humoring me?" you whispered, your voice barely audible.
felix’s hand stopped moving on your shoulder. jisung sat up straight, his expression turning completely serious.
"what do you mean?" jisung asked, sliding off the couch to sit on the floor right in front of you, crossing his legs so he was eye-level. felix followed a second later, sitting right beside him, his warm hand instantly finding yours and locking his fingers with yours.
"just... tonight," you said, looking down at your intertwined fingers with felix. "and last week. you guys have so many stories and jokes that i don't know. you look at each other and just know what the other person is thinking. and i'm just sitting here."
"sweetheart," felix murmured, his voice laced with sudden hurt. "we don't ever want you to feel like that."
"i know you don't," you said quickly, a tear finally escaping and hitting your knee. you don't wipe it away. "that's why it's worse. you guys are so good to me, but i just feel like i'm forcing myself into a space that was already full. you two were happy before me. you make sense. i feel like i'm just... breaking up your rhythm. or something."
"stop," jisung said. his voice wasn't mean, but it was incredibly firm, cutting off your words. he reached out, taking your face in both of his hands, forcing you to look at him. his eyes were shiny with unshed tears, looking completely heartbroken. "don't ever say that. don't even think it."
"jisung—"
"no, listen to me," he insisted, his thumbs wiping away the wetness on your cheeks. "yes, 'lix and i have history. we can't change that. but our history ended where you started. when we asked you to be with us, it wasn't because we had extra room or because we were bored. it was because we both fell completely in love with you."
"we were happy before, yeah," felix joined in, his grip on your hand tighteing almost painfully. "but it's nothing compared to how happy we are now. you didn't break our rhythm, you made it better."
you looked between the two of them, your breath hitching as you saw the absolute sincerity and desperation in both of their faces. they weren't just saying things to make you feel better. it seemed like they were genuinely terrified that you believed you didn't belong.
"i'm just scared," you admitted, your voice breaking as more tears came. "i don't want to be the person that holds you guys back from just being you."
jisung let out a shaky breath, leaning forward to press his forehead against yours, his hands still cradling your face. "there is no us without you anymore. we don't want it. if we're making inside jokes, tell us to shut up. tell us to explain it. we're idiots sometimes, we don't realize we're doing it, but please don't pull away from us."
"we'll make new jokes," felix promised. "we have the rest of our lives to make memories where you're right in the middle of them. you're ours. completely equal. always."
jisung pulled back just enough to press a firm, lingering kiss to your lips, tasting like salt and reassurance. the moment he pulled away, felix shifted up to kiss your cheek, his arms wrapping securely around your waist from the side, anchoring you between the two of them.
you sat there on the living room floor, surrounded by their warmth. you still had a lot of history to learn, and there would still be days where you felt a little left behind, but looking at the two boys holding onto you like you were their entire world, you finally believed that you weren't going anywhere.
synopsis: everyone teases felix for being glued to your side, but it isn’t until a drunken confession at a party that you realize the truth..his clinginess is more than a habit, it’s love.
warnings: college au, slow burn, mutual pining, fluff with angst, mentions of alcohol and jealousy.
wc: 5497
part of nini’s 3k special event (requests closed)
You didn’t meet Felix the way people imagine friendships are born, not through some dramatic coincidence or fateful brush of shoulders in a lecture hall, not because you were paired up for a project and discovered how well you clicked. It was smaller than that. Forgettable, almost, if it weren’t for the way he lingered.
It was at the beginning of the semester, when you’d gone to grab coffee with a couple of classmates you knew from orientation. Felix was there because he’d wandered in with someone else, not really in your circle, not really belonging to anyone’s yet. He had the kind of presence that didn’t immediately demand attention. He sat at the edge of the booth, soft-spoken but smiling at the right moments, laughing at jokes even when he wasn’t the one being spoken to.
You barely remembered what he said that day. Something about how he thought the campus map was designed to confuse people. Something about how the iced coffee here was better than back home. What you remembered instead was the way he seemed comfortable being on the periphery, content with floating.
For the first few weeks, that’s how he existed in your group, an extra body at the table, a face in the crowd when you all headed to the dining hall. He was friendly, sure, but not insistent. He came along if someone invited him, stayed quiet if the group got too loud. He wasn’t clingy then. Not at all.
But somewhere between late night study sessions and impromptu dinners, between everyone’s jokes and complaints about professors, something shifted.
It wasn’t obvious at first. He started sitting next to you more often, but so what? People did that all the time. He’d ask you what you thought of assignments before he asked anyone else, but maybe that was coincidence. He started walking you back to your dorm after late evenings, claiming it was “on his way,” even when you knew it wasn’t.
The others noticed before you did.
“Are you guys, like… a thing?” one of your friends teased one night, when Felix had gone up to the counter to grab extra napkins for you.
You choked on your drink, waving it off. “No, no. We’re just—he’s just Felix.”
But when he came back, sliding the napkins in front of you with a small grin like it was the most natural thing in the world, you caught the exchanged glances around the table. Everyone seemed to silently agree: if it wasn’t something now, it was only a matter of time.
The truth was, you didn’t know how to name what you were with him. He wasn’t your boyfriend. He wasn’t just another friend either. There was an intimacy to the way he paid attention, how he seemed tuned to your frequency even in a crowded room.
And slowly, gradually, he became the clingy one.
Not in a suffocating way. Not in the way that made you want to push him back. It was more like he carved out a space near you and refused to let it go. His laughter came quicker when you were the one speaking. His jokes were softer when meant only for you. His presence settled next to you like an extra layer you didn’t know you’d been missing until it was there.
People teased, of course. Sometimes the whole group would groan if you two made eye contact across the room, like they were watching some drawn-out sitcom romance that refused to admit itself. Other times, it was more subtle, a nudge when he offered you the last slice of pizza, a smirk when he passed you his notes before anyone else.
And maybe, though you never admitted it out loud part of you liked it.
It was easier not to think too hard about it, though. College had its rhythm, and your friend group had its dynamic. Felix’s clinginess became part of the background noise, something you accepted the way you accepted that one friend who always borrowed your pens or the one who constantly forgot their charger.
Only, this wasn’t the same. You knew it wasn’t the same.
Because sometimes, in quiet moments, when the group wasn’t around to buffer the closeness, you felt the weight of it, of him, of the way he hovered just close enough that you wondered what would happen if you reached out.
You didn’t. Of course you didn’t.
So the weeks blurred into months. Felix went from the quiet guy at the edge of the booth to the one people automatically assumed would be sitting next to you. The one whose clinginess became a joke everyone shared. The one you couldn’t quite define.
And that was how things stood the night of the party.
You’d all been invited, and of course Felix was going because you were going, and he went where you did. No one even questioned it anymore. It was simply expected.
You told yourself it was just another night. Just another college party. Just another chance to pretend that the tension building between you two wasn’t real.
But deep down, maybe you already knew something was going to shift.
-
Felix texted you before you had even finished doing your eyeliner.
I’m outside. Take your time though. Don’t rush.
You stared at the message for a long second, chewing the inside of your cheek, before tossing your phone onto the bed. Typical Felix. He had a way of making everything sound patient, like waiting for you wasn’t a chore but some kind of privilege. Like he’d rather sit out there in the cool September evening than do anything else with his time.
It didn’t help that tonight, for reasons you still couldn’t entirely explain to yourself, you’d dressed up more than usual. Not over-the-top, not like you were going to a formal or anything, but more than your usual party getup. A little more makeup. A top that hugged you in ways you normally avoided. Clothes that whispered notice me, though you told yourself they were for no one in particular.
But now, as you checked yourself one more time in the mirror, you couldn’t ignore the truth: some part of you had been thinking about him when you chose this.
You swallowed hard, tugged at your hem, then grabbed your jacket and bag before heading out the door.
He was leaning against the side of the building when you stepped out, his phone in one hand, the other tucked into his pocket. The moment he looked up and saw you, the shift was instant. His eyes widened, his posture straightened, and for a second, just a flicker he looked like he’d forgotten how to breathe.
You noticed. Of course you noticed.
“Hey,” you said, trying for casual, like your pulse wasn’t hammering.
His mouth opened, then closed again, before finally forming a grin that was just a little too shaky to be natural. “Wow. You, uh… you look…” He trailed off, shaking his head like the words had gotten stuck somewhere between his brain and his mouth. Finally, he managed: “Really good.”
The compliment shouldn’t have made your face warm, but it did. You laughed it off, rolling your eyes, and started walking to the car. “You’re just saying that.”
“I’m not,” he muttered, following close behind. “Seriously. You look amazing.”
And that set the tone for the night.
At the party, the music was loud enough to rattle the walls, the bass vibrating in your chest with every beat. People were already spilling out onto the porch, drinks in hand, voices raised above the noise. Inside, it was a haze of flashing lights, sweat, laughter, and too many bodies crammed into too little space.
Felix had promised he’d stay close to you tonight “I’ve got your back,” he’d said earlier, with that earnest little half-smile of his. And true to his word, he kept himself within arm’s reach. Always just there, behind you as you pushed through the crowd, next to you as you grabbed drinks, leaning down so his breath brushed your ear when he asked if you were okay.
And yet… tonight felt different.
He wasn’t just close. He was hovering. Protective in a way that felt heavier than usual. His hand lingered at the small of your back when someone bumped into you. His gaze scanned the room like he was looking for threats. And every time someone else’s eyes lingered on you for a moment too long, you felt his attention sharpen, his arm inch closer, his voice drop lower like he needed to stake a claim.
You told yourself you were imagining it. That it was just Felix being Felix. That he wasn’t… jealous.
But then it happened.
He’d slipped away for just a moment, bathroom, maybe, or maybe someone had called his name from across the room. You didn’t notice at first, too busy balancing your drink, too busy weaving through the crowd. But when you turned around, he wasn’t there.
That was when someone else approached you.
A guy from one of your classes, someone you only vaguely knew. He was smiling, leaning in to be heard over the music, saying something about recognizing you from lecture. It was harmless, really. You weren’t flirting, weren’t encouraging anything. You were just… talking.
-
You didn’t notice him watching at first.
The music was too loud, the house too crowded, the boy from your class too chatty. He was telling some ridiculous story about how he nearly failed the last quiz because he misread a question, and though you weren’t especially invested, the way he gestured with his hands and pulled a face at the end made you laugh. Not a big laugh, just a small one, enough to break the tension of the room, enough to make the drink in your hand slosh dangerously close to the rim.
But Felix noticed.
He had just reemerged from the kitchen, a cup in his hand, when he saw you tilt your head back, eyes crinkling, mouth soft with amusement. The sound was drowned out by the bass, but he didn’t need to hear it. He felt it like a pinprick under his ribs.
Jealousy wasn’t something Felix liked to admit to himself. He didn’t think of himself as the jealous type. He wasn’t possessive. He wasn’t controlling. He wasn’t your boyfriend.
But the way that guy leaned in too close, the way you laughed like you’d forgotten everything else in the room for just a second, it did something to him. Something sharp, something that made his grip tighten around the cup until the plastic bent slightly in his hand.
He could have crossed the room. Could have put himself at your side, easy as breathing, reminded both you and the other guy that Felix was always there. He could have cracked a joke, pulled you away, done something.
But he didn’t.
He didn’t say a word.
Instead, he turned back toward the kitchen, away from the sight of you laughing with someone who wasn’t him. He swallowed the bitter taste rising in his throat and replaced it with something else: the burn of alcohol.
One drink turned into two. Two into three. Time blurred, the music becoming fuzzier, the edges of the night softening into something less distinct. But the sharpness in his chest didn’t fade. If anything, it pulsed stronger with each sip, until he was chasing the numbness more desperately than he wanted to admit.
By the time you finally found him again, he was slouched against the counter, shoulders loose, his grin too wide to be steady.
“There you are,” you said, relief cutting through the irritation in your voice. You’d been weaving through the crowd, searching, your pulse quickening when you realized how long he’d been gone. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”
“’M right here,” he slurred, lifting his cup in a mock toast before nearly spilling half of it down his shirt. He blinked at the mess, then laughed at himself, like it was all just a big joke.
You reached out, steadying the cup before he could drop it completely. “You’re drunk,” you muttered.
“Mmm, maybe,” he hummed, leaning closer to you than he needed to. His breath carried the sharp tang of liquor, his words dragging lazily over his tongue. “But, like… s’fine. I’m good.”
You weren’t so sure. His eyes were glassy, unfocused, and he swayed slightly even when leaning against the counter.
“Felix…” You sighed, lowering your voice so only he could hear. “What’s going on? Why did you disappear like that?”
He looked at you then. Really looked. For a moment, the grin faltered, his expression wobbling like something fragile beneath the alcohol haze. And when he spoke, his voice was softer, words tumbling out unguarded.
“I’m… clingy, aren’t I?”
The question caught you off guard. You blinked, trying to process it, but he didn’t give you time to answer.
“I know I am,” he continued, words tripping over themselves, slurred but insistent. “Always around you. Always—like—hovering. People think we’re, y’know… together.” He gave a half-hearted laugh, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “But we’re not. And I know you don’t… don’t like me like that.”
Your chest tightened. The party faded into background static, the laughter and music dimming under the weight of his voice.
“But it’s okay,” he said, shrugging, though the motion made him nearly lose his balance. You caught his arm instinctively, steadying him. He looked down at where your hand touched him, then back up at you with a weak smile. “It’s okay, really. I don’t mind. I just… I just like being near you. S’good enough for me.”
The words hung in the air, heavy and fragile all at once.
You opened your mouth. Wanted to tell him he was wrong. Wanted to tell him you did like him, more than you’d ever said out loud. Wanted to tell him everything you’d been holding back every time someone teased, every time his hand brushed yours, every time you caught yourself wondering what would happen if you closed the distance.
But the words stuck. Froze. Lodged in your throat like glass.
So you said nothing.
And Felix, seeing your silence, laughed again. Forced, brittle. “Don’t worry ‘bout it,” he slurred, waving his free hand as if brushing the moment aside. “Just drunk talk. Doesn’t mean anything.”
But you both knew it wasn’t true.
Felix didn’t let go of your arm after that.
Even when you shifted to put his drink aside, he clung a little tighter, his hand sliding down to find your wrist like he was afraid you might disappear if he loosened his grip. His weight leaned into you, warm and heavy, and you realized that he wasn’t just tipsy, he was on the edge of being too far gone.
“Lix,” you murmured, keeping your tone gentle. “You need water. Maybe some air.”
“I need you,” he blurted, then immediately gave a lopsided smile like he could soften the edges of what he’d said. “I mean, like—y’know… I always need you.”
Your chest squeezed. The words were slurred, tangled, but they landed too squarely on truths you’d tried not to name. You couldn’t meet his eyes, couldn’t let yourself drown in the rawness there, so you focused on keeping him upright as you guided him a few steps away from the counter.
He followed without resistance. Maybe too willingly, because each step brought him closer until he was practically draped against your side, his head dipping just low enough that his breath brushed against your temple.
“You don’t get it,” he mumbled, words spilling like they’d been waiting too long to escape. “I know I’m… clingy. Everyone jokes. I can hear ’em. I know I stick too close. But it’s ’cause… it’s you. It’s always you.”
“Felix—”
“I don’t care if you don’t like me back,” he cut in, swaying slightly as you steadied him. “I’ll take what I can get. Jus’… being near you. That’s enough. I don’t need more.”
It should’ve been flattering. Sweet, even. But the way he said it quiet, raw, almost resigned, twisted something inside you. Because you wanted to tell him he was wrong. That it wasn’t one-sided. That you’d been holding your tongue out of fear, not lack of feeling.
But again, the words froze.
And that was when Jisung appeared.
“Whoa, whoa, what do we have here?” His voice cut through the fog of the party, light and teasing, as he stepped out from the throng of people with a cup in his hand. His eyes flicked between the two of you, Felix clinging, you steadying him and his grin widened.
“Don’t,” you warned automatically, but it was too late.
“I knew it,” Jisung laughed, pointing the rim of his cup toward Felix. “You’re all over them, Lix. Didn’t think you’d get drunk enough to admit it, though.”
Felix groaned softly, burying his face against your shoulder as though hiding there could undo the words he’d already said. His voice was muffled when he muttered, “Shut up, Ji…”
“Careful,” Jisung sing-songed, clearly entertained. “You’re gonna regret all this tomorrow. Saying things you can’t take back.”
That made Felix lift his head again, eyes hazy but stubborn. “Don’t care,” he slurred. “Not gonna regret it. S’true.”
The sincerity in his voice made your breath hitch. You felt heat creeping up your neck, threatening to spill into your cheeks, and you bit down on the inside of your lip to stop yourself from laughing, not because it was funny, but because it was the only way to keep the rising emotions from breaking through.
Jisung just shook his head, chuckling as he backed away. “Alright, alright. I’ll leave you two lovebirds. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.”
And then it was just you and Felix again, the air around you heavier for what had been said, what had been overheard.
You adjusted your grip on him, brushing his hair back from his eyes. “Okay, Lix. That’s enough for tonight. Let’s get you out of here before you pass out standing up.”
He hummed softly, leaning more of his weight into you as if to prove your point. “Don’t wanna go,” he murmured, voice small now, stripped of the bravado alcohol had given him. “If we leave, you’ll… you’ll put me down somewhere. You’ll leave.”
The ache in your chest deepened.
“I’m not leaving you,” you whispered, barely audible over the thrum of music. “I’ll take care of you, okay? You just need to rest.”
His grip tightened again, as though testing the truth of your promise. Then, slowly, he let you guide him through the crowd, out into the cooler night air, the noise of the party fading behind you.
The walk back to your dorm was quiet, punctuated only by his uneven steps and the occasional mumble of your name. He didn’t protest anymore. Just clung to you like you were the only thing tethering him to solid ground.
And when you finally opened your door, helping him inside, the reality of it sank in: you weren’t just carrying him out of the party. You were carrying the weight of everything unspoken between you, everything he’d confessed through liquor-loosened lips, everything you hadn’t been able to say back.
You sat him down on your bed, his head lolling slightly as he tried to focus on you.
And you knew the night wasn’t over yet.
Not by a long shot.
Your dorm was dim and quiet compared to the chaos of the party. The muffled hum of distant laughter and music filtered in faintly through the window, but here, the air felt still, heavy with something else entirely.
Felix slumped down on your bed as soon as you nudged him toward it, his body folding like he’d been waiting all night for the chance to stop holding himself up. You bent to untangle his shoes, trying to ignore the way his eyes followed you, soft and unfocused, like you were the only thing keeping him tethered to the room.
“There,” you murmured, easing the last shoe off. “Better.”
But before you could straighten, his hand caught yours.
“Stay,” he whispered.
Your chest clenched. “I’m not going anywhere. I just need to—”
“No.” His grip was weak, clumsy, but insistent. “Here. With me.”
And then, with more strength than you thought he had left, he tugged. You lost your balance, half-falling, half-collapsing onto the mattress beside him. The sudden weight of him against you, his arm draping over your middle as if by instinct, made your breath catch in your throat.
You froze.
Your neck felt hot, your cheeks burned, your whole body buzzing with awareness of how close he was, his warmth pressed along your side, his hair brushing your cheek, the faint smell of alcohol on his breath.
“Felix—” you started, but the word broke when he tightened his hold, burying his face against your shoulder.
“Don’t let go,” he mumbled.
You swallowed hard, your pulse thundering in your ears. “I wasn’t planning to.”
He made a small sound of contentment, somewhere between a sigh and a hum, and for a moment you thought maybe he’d drift off just like that. But then his voice came again, muffled against your shirt, thick with the haze of drink but heavy with meaning.
“I’m clingy,” he said again, as though repeating it could carve it into the walls of your room. “Too clingy. Can’t… can’t stop. Even if I should.”
You closed your eyes. “You don’t have to stop.”
He shifted, his nose brushing the curve of your neck, sending another wave of heat across your skin. “I like you. So much.” His words were slurred, tangled, but painfully sincere. “Even if you don’t… doesn’t matter. I’ll take whatever I can get. Just don’t—don’t leave.”
Your throat ached.
You wanted to say it. Wanted to tell him he was wrong, that you did like him, that you’d been holding yourself back because you were afraid of moments exactly like this, moments where you couldn’t be sure he’d remember, where you couldn’t be sure it would matter once the night sobered into morning.
The words crowded your chest, pressing against your ribs, begging to escape. I like you too, Lix.
But you didn’t say them.
Because what if he didn’t remember? What if you confessed here, now, and tomorrow it was nothing but a blur to him, just another piece of drunken nonsense to brush aside? The thought of cheapening it, of letting something so real slip into the fog of alcohol, terrified you.
So you bit your tongue. Stayed quiet. Let the words burn holes in your chest instead of giving them to him.
Felix, oblivious to the war raging in you, only held you tighter, whispering the same things again and again. “I like you. Don’t leave. I’ll be fine if you don’t like me back. Just… stay.”
And you did.
You lay there in the dark, tangled in his arms, your body stiff with nerves even as your heart longed to melt into him. You stared at the ceiling, cheeks hot, pulse loud, every repetition of his confession carving deeper into you.
Eventually, his words slowed, his breaths evening out until they brushed steady and warm against your skin. His grip never loosened, even as sleep finally pulled him under.
And still, you didn’t move.
Because leaving would have felt like lying.
Because some part of you hoped, desperately that maybe he’d remember this in the morning after all.
-
You woke to warmth and weight.
For a moment, groggy and half-caught between sleep and waking, you didn’t remember where you were, only that there was a solid presence pressed against you, an arm heavy over your waist, the sound of soft, even breathing against the back of your neck.
And then memory hit.
The party. Felix leaning into you, words slurred and raw. His confessions, repeated like a broken record. The way he clung to you until you gave in, the way he held you like he’d never let go.
Your eyes opened fully, fixed on the ceiling.
He was still asleep, or at least he looked like it. His arm was snug around you, his chest rising and falling against your back, strands of his hair tickling your cheek. You lay there frozen, pulse pounding in the quiet of your dorm, torn between not wanting to move and the unbearable weight of what was unsaid.
Because you’d almost told him last night. Almost let the truth spill out. Almost given yourself away.
But you hadn’t.
And now you didn’t know if the chance was gone.
Eventually, Felix stirred. A small groan escaped him, his grip tightening for a second before he rolled back slightly, blinking against the light. You turned your head to watch him wake, to catch the moment his hazy gaze focused on you.
And there it was, the smile. Soft, sleepy, but tinged with something you couldn’t quite read.
“Morning,” he rasped, voice rough with sleep.
You swallowed, your throat dry. “Morning.”
For a beat, there was silence. And then, casually, like it didn’t matter, he said:
“Uh… did I drink too much last night? Feels like I did.” He chuckled lightly, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry if I was a mess.”
The words landed like a stone in your stomach.
He was pretending. You knew it instantly. His eyes flicked away too quickly, his laugh was too forced, his words too neat for someone who supposedly remembered nothing. He remembered. Of course he did.
But he was choosing to lie.
And in that moment, all the heat you’d swallowed, all the words you’d buried, all the ache you’d carried from the party surged up too strong to contain.
“Nothing important happened,” you heard yourself say, the lie burning as it left your lips.
He nodded, like he wanted to believe you. Like he wanted to erase it all.
And that was what cracked you open.
Your chest squeezed, your eyes stung, and before you could stop yourself, you sat up, pulling slightly away from him. “Why are you doing this?”
Felix blinked, startled. “Doing what?”
“Pretending.” Your voice shook, anger and hurt tangling together. “You—last night, you—you told me things. You said things. And now you’re acting like it never happened.”
His mouth opened, closed. You could see the panic flicker across his face, the instinct to retreat into silence. But you didn’t let him.
“Do you know how much it killed me to hear you say you were okay with just being near me?” you went on, your words tumbling out fast, sharp, unpracticed. “Like that was all you deserved? Like I didn’t—like I wouldn’t want you too? Do you know how much I wanted to tell you?”
Your voice cracked on the last words, and you pressed your hands to your face, hating the heat burning your cheeks, hating the tears threatening to rise.
Silence stretched. Heavy, suffocating.
And then you felt it, his hand, warm against yours, gently tugging your hands down from your face. You looked at him, ready to see guilt or denial or panic.
But instead, his eyes were steady. Soft. Bare.
He didn’t speak. Didn’t try to explain himself.
Instead, he leaned forward, closing the space between you with agonizing slowness, as if giving you every chance to pull away.
And then his lips pressed to yours.
It wasn’t rushed. It wasn’t desperate. It was slow, deliberate, deep like he wanted to pour every unspoken word, every swallowed feeling, every lie and half-truth into the kiss and let it speak for him.
Your breath caught, your heart stuttered, and all the heat and ache you’d been carrying melted into the steady press of his mouth against yours.
You kissed him back. Of course you did.
Because there was no pretending left in that moment. No lies, no drunken haze, no silence too heavy to bear. Just him. Just you. Just the truth you’d both been too afraid to say.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his breath uneven.
“Not pretending anymore,” he whispered.
For a moment, the silence after the kiss felt louder than the music that had thumped through the party hours ago. His forehead was still against yours, his breath warm, his eyes flickering over your face like he was afraid you might vanish if he blinked.
Your chest was tight, but this time you didn’t swallow the words. You let them come, shaky but real. “I like you, Lix.”
His breath hitched, and then unexpectedly, he laughed. Not mocking, not dismissive. A soft, disbelieving sound that broke apart into something brighter, something lighter than you’d ever heard from him. “You have no idea,” he said, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe you. “You have no idea how much I like you. How long I’ve…” His voice trailed off, but his grin stayed, boyish and helpless. “I’ve liked you for so long. Since before I even realized what it meant.”
Your pulse stuttered, warmth rushing up your neck. “Then why didn’t you say anything?”
He ducked his head, still smiling in that sheepish way, still close enough that his hair brushed your cheek. “Guess I didn’t know how. Or maybe I was scared you’d laugh. I thought if I just… stayed close, it’d be enough.”
“Idiot,” you whispered, though your lips curved despite yourself. “If you’re gonna confess, at least do it properly.”
His gaze snapped back to yours, bright even in the dim light of your dorm. And then, as if he was steadying himself, he took a slow breath and said it. Clear this time. No slur, no hesitation. “I like you. More than a friend. More than I’ve ever liked anyone. I don’t want just to hover near you or pretend I’m fine with less. I want you.”
The weight of it hit you like a tide, and suddenly your throat wasn’t so tight anymore. The words spilled out before you could stop them. “I like you too. I’ve been holding it back for so long because I was scared. Scared of ruining what we had, scared of reading too much into the way you… you always stayed close.” You exhaled shakily, finally meeting his eyes. “But I want you, too. Not just near me. With me.”
For a beat, neither of you moved. The words hung between you, raw and undeniable, heavier than all the silence you’d endured until now.
And then Felix let out a breathy laugh, his smile so wide it crinkled the corners of his eyes. He leaned in, kissing you again, softer this time, lingering like he wanted to memorize the shape of it. When he pulled back, his voice was quiet but steady. “I’m happy. Right here. With you. Finally.”
His hand found yours, fingers lacing tight like he wasn’t ever planning to let go again.
And for the first time, you believed it wasn’t just Felix clinging to you. You were holding on, too.
-
Morning light spilled across your dorm room, pale and unforgiving, but you barely noticed it. Not when Felix was still there, tangled up with you like sleep hadn’t loosened his grip. His arm draped over your waist, his hand curled loosely against your shirt, as though even unconscious he couldn’t stop holding on.
You should’ve been nervous. Should’ve been panicking about what this meant, about how your friend group would react, about how things might change. But instead, all you felt was calm. Because for once, nothing between you was unspoken.
When Felix sat up, his hair sticking up in every direction, he groaned dramatically and buried his face in your shoulder. “Don’t let them see me like this,” he mumbled. “Like what?” you teased. “Clingy?” That earned you a muffled groan and then a laugh, low and sheepish, before he finally pulled back enough to meet your gaze. His grin was lopsided, soft in a way that made your chest ache. “Like yours.”
You didn’t even bother hiding the way you smiled. “Too late for that. Everyone’s going to know.”
And you were right.
Later that afternoon, when you and Felix walked into the dining hall together, side by side, you felt the shift ripple through the group instantly. They didn’t need an announcement. They didn’t need you to explain why Felix’s hand brushed yours a little too easily, or why your shoulders leaned a little too close.
“Finally,” one of your friends groaned, throwing their head back dramatically. “Took you long enough.” Another smirked. “Guess the clinginess paid off, huh, Lix?”
Felix only grinned, unbothered, and this time he didn’t shrink under the teasing. Instead, he leaned a fraction closer to you, his voice low enough for only you to hear. “Told you. I’m happy right here.”
And you believed him. Because so were you.
//
masterlist.
a/n: for @lililixie 🐣 thank you for your request!
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