✿ summary: The feeling of deja vu you get when you start to see yourself in your ex's new relationship.
*(levi x gn!reader (past relationship), levi x petra.)
** Based on deja vu by Olivia Rodrigo
✿ genres, warnings: Angst (?), no tws besides poor writing and bad grammar lmao.
✿ notes: I haven't written any one-shots since I was 16 (now much older than that lol). I'm really obsessed with that new Olivia Rodrigo song and had a daydream about this little scenario, so here it is. I have never written anything from a gender-neutral perspective but I want to be as inclusive as I can if I'm going to be posting self-insert fanfiction, any comments on how I can improve are welcomed! hope you enjoy it.
*** levi icon by @/slkvenus on tumblr and art by Holly Warburton (@/holly-warbs)
That used to be their thing.
“Ours,” y/n thinks to themselves as they watch Levi pour a cup of the hot beverage into Petra’s cup from the half-open door of the dining hall. Petra takes a small sip of the steaming drink and scrunches her nose in something that y/n can only make out to be disgust. “It’s so bitter,” she whispers in between sweet giggles. A sound so sweet and intimate; it almost made y/n nauseous.
“Ours,” y/n thinks to themselves as they watch Levi pour a cup of the hot beverage into Petra’s cup from the half-open door of the dining hall. Petra takes a small sip of the steaming drink and scrunches her nose in something that y/n can only make out to be disgust. “It’s so bitter,” she whispers in between sweet giggles. A sound so sweet and intimate; it almost made y/n nauseous.
“Tch, you will get used to it,” Levi replied. His usual monotone tone, accompanied with a hint of something else.
Something that y/n knew all too well.
They could almost laugh at the irony of that moment.
Only a few years before, it had been them pouring Levi a cup of tea. It had been him complaining about the bitter taste.
Unknowing to Levi at the time, it would become his most characteristic habits. One that would replace the heavy drinking that had lead to so many regrettable decisions. One that he would share with others as a symbol of intimacy and comfort. One that would even come to save his life.
To y/n, it was yet another thing he had unsuspectingly stolen from them and given to someone else with no regard.
Within the last few months, y/n kept finding pieces of themselves scattered all over Petras’s life, resentfully aware that it had been Levi who had been leaving those remnants.
They saw her at what used to be y/n “secret hideout.” They have caught glimpses of Petra sneaking out from the Capitan’s office late at night. Flushed-faced and bright-eyed, very reminiscent of another time in y/n’s life. They remembered seeing Petra reading their favorite book about two weeks ago. Y/n caught the light blush on Petra’s face when Hange asked her it at the dinner table.
“Oh, this? Capitan Levi, let me borrow it. He has great taste in literature!”
“I bet he does,” y/n snored almost intuitively as they stuffed their mouth with the staled bread. Sure, it might have been better if they said nothing, but now that had they had, they didn’t particularly regret it. Y/n had shown him that book. Their favorite, to say the least. A book so sacred to them, it almost felt criminal to see other people indulge in the words they found so personal.
Petra looked up with wide, curious eyes at the comment, ignorant to the nights y/n and Levi had stayed up discussing even the most minuscule details of the piece she held in her hands.
“Say Petra; you must be really close to the Captain if he’s showing his books. Seems... so personal,” Y/N said between sips of their tea to try to change the focus from their offputting comment.
Petra’s face turned a deep shade of red that said more than anything she could say could. She must feel so special. To have knocked down the seemly impenetrable walls Levi surrounds himself with.
“I guess it’s easier than it seems,” y/n thought then, the scene enveloping in front of them only making that much more apparent.
The aroma of black tea permeating the dining hall. The pale light of the moonlight. The reflection of courtyard lights. y/n had lived this moment before, but back then, it had not been from the outside looking in.
It felt almost like deja vu. Except, it wasn’t quite right. This scene felt much more repulsive than the one that lived in her subconscious.
Y/n couldn’t help but wonder, does he feel deja vu when he is with her?
