Today there is 3 days until I move!!! 🥳🥳🥳
A few more things have been settled between my ex and I. So that's good.
Today I did some more adulting. Looked at the insurances and my future budget. I suck at such things, but it looks like it is fine now. I'm insured and covered. And it looks like I might even have room in my budget to save up a little money every month. That would be absolutely wonderful!
I talked with my ex yesterday about how we are two very different parents. He's very good at taking the kids on trips and seeing different sights and so on. I'm am more the kind of parent who will do crafty things with the kids and take them to the library and invent fun stories for us to talk about and build on. I actually liked that conversation because it helped me see myself as a good enough parent, even when I don't drag the kids to museums and events all over the country.
A good thing about the new house:
Since I won't be bringing too many things, I hope to settle very quickly in my new home. This also means that I can quickly start to focus on helping my kids heal from having their world torn apart.
Generally, though, I think they will do just fine after max 2 months of seeing how it works for them and us parents, to have our new routines and new lives. But there will still be harsh talks to have and tears to be wiped away.
I have always been the parent who gave the kids all the emotional support I possibly can. When our first cat died, I comforted the kids. When mid-kid was scared about starting school, swimming lessons or the scouts, I have been comforting her. When lil-kid has problems with other kids in daycare, I make sure to comfort her and talk with the daycare teachers about the problems. When big-kid complains about her classmates being shitty, I talk to her and ask her if I or her teachers can help make the situation better.
All this (and more) will continue after the move. I have no idea how to actually navigate their grieving regarding my moving away from their dad, but for starters I will make sure to talk to all of them and have them ask me all the hard questions that I will answer as well and age-apropriately as I can. It will be very much a go-with-the-flow thing at first. Perhaps that's all it takes for them to heal. If we need help from someone else, I will know who to call.
But I hope I can help the kids see quite fast that it's a good thing that I moved out and that the new house is a nice house, even if they have to share room. I will do my best to help the kids heal asap.













